I want to get rid of my cats - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 09:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't expect any sympathy here. I know many people believe a pet is for life- I used to believe that too. My mom gives me enough guilt about it. I used to be a HUGE cat lover. Then I had DD, and 2 out of my 3 cats just drive me insane. They destroy my house, are constantly underfoot, nearely tripping me when I am carrying DD. They get into everything, knock stuff off of every possible surface, are constantly on the counters when I cook. They lick food whenever I am not looking- drag my raw meat into the hallway, constantly try to run out the door (they are inside cats). I don't have the time and/or money anymore to take care of 3 cats, and I just feel like it isn't fair to any of us. I don't show them any love, and I am constantly yelling at them. I would NEVER euthanize them or take them back to the pound, but I just wish I could give them to a family I knew would love them to pieces. I would give them to my mom in a heartbeat but she doesn't want anymore cats. I don't want to bring DD up to be mean to animals! I hate the way I am with them, but I just don't feel the love anymore. *sigh*

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#2 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 09:36 AM
 
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btdt! s

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#3 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 10:41 AM
 
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Since you used to be a cat lover, I am wondering if your new situation (having a new DD which does change your lifestyle/stress levels) has impacted this. I have a friend who a child, and her cat (who had lived with her for 9 years) suddenly became a "source of annoyance." Well, in her case, she was super stressed out and didn't get a lot of help at home and she was resenting the cat as in her mind it was "just more work."

I just want to point out, that this may just be a phase. I know that after I had my kiddos for the first 6 or 7 months I did very little with the cats and at one point even was getting frustrated with them. BUT, it passed. DH at the time helped out by doing litter pans/feeding them so it helped a lot.

Now, with my youngest around 18 months and my others now young children just love having the kitties so much. So much so that we adopted a new cat when one passed on.

Anyhow, just a thought. Cats do well if they are found good new homes...it does require a lot of patience for the new owners and time. I can say as the cats I've adopted during my life have been older cats. The girl we just adopted is 6 years old.

Perpetually breastfeeding or pregnant ENFP mom to a lot of kids...wife to a midwestern nice guy...living in tropical paradise...pink cats and homebirths rock!

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#4 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 03:38 PM
 
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The same happened to me. My cats were fine, and I thought would be wonderful with DD. Nope. We brought her home and they went insane - doing things they had never done before. Much like what you mentioned. The last straw was my female manx mix scratched my sister in the face just for the heck of it. So, we made the cats outdoor cats. Then, they took up with the neighbors a few houses over. Those neighbors have now made them indoor cats again - after asking us about them.

My dog - who everyone feared with DD - a dalmatian, has been great as always. DD and he play all the time, and he is so loving toward her. Granted he is treated more like the dog now than like the baby (he was the baby now he's the big brother), but he has taken the change well, and loves DD. I'm proud of him.

So, I can't really say I'm a cat person anymore. Now, it's fish and "dog". Though, DD seems really interested in them...

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#5 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 03:57 PM
 
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You will get nothing but empathy from me! My husband's 4 cats would have been gone a long time ago if it were up to me. We have a full basement that is unfinished but we're in and out of there a lot doing laundry and stuff and they have lived down there for a couple of years. It's the best compromise we could come to. I hope you can work something out.
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#6 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 04:05 PM
 
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You could make a listing on petfinder.com or craigslist. I would never put an animal in a shelter either. There are so many diseases flying around those places.

Tis the season, for hot apple cider!
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#7 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 04:07 PM
 
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Introducing a baby into the family can be such a rough transition for a pet and can bring up some really undesirable behaviors in cats. I found myself resenting our three cats when dd was born because two of them have litter issues. They both had issues before dd was born, but they'd been better for a while and I hadn't realized how protective I was going to be of dd. The thought of her finding and getting into cat pee or crap on the floor really freaked me out. Cleaning up a mess before she was born just didn't bother me that much, so the depth of my revulsion and frustration was a shock. (And if you check back through my previous posts on this forum, you'll see we tried EVERYTHING short of kitty diapers and valium.)

Our solution was to make them outdoor cats for the time being. And honestly, all three are thrilled. They're all rescue cats and the two males had previously spent a lot of time outside and apparently really liked it. I know it increases the dangers, but their quality of life and ours has greatly improved and I know as far as outdoor areas go, ours is pretty safe. But if we hadn't been able to do that, I would have seriously considered rehoming at least one of them, even though it would have broken my heart to do so. As it is, all three are sleeker, healthier, clearly happier, and the litter issues have once again disappeared.
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#8 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 04:47 PM
 
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THREE indoor cats? Wow. That would drive me crazy too! I hope you have a big house.

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#9 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 05:15 PM
 
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I am in the same boat. My two rottweilers moved in with my parents soon after dd was born. The one destroyed everything in sight if not constantly supervised. This was not a problem before having a child, but once there is a child, the child gets the attention. The dog chewed up both my couches, a recliner, wood furnature, you name it. The other one didn't like kids. I still have my cat, but I would love to re-home her. She meow's and wakes up the little one. She bites and scratches at the little one. Yes, the little one will pull her tail and bite her. Its hard to maintain the safety of the little one. I am tired of the cat peeing on everything, even though her box is cleaned daily, and she is the only cat. She is fixed, too. Its not a medical problem, its a behavioral problem. I never pet the cat. I really wish I had someone to give her to that would give her a better home than I can.
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#10 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 05:28 PM
 
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At the moment we are cat less - but not by choice, our landlord is not cat friendly, so we have a rabbit But we had two cats who were like family members when expecting my first child - one died while I was pregnant very sad. The other did awesome adjusting to the baby - slept in the crib - great since the baby never did. I think perhaps the trick with us was that she was VERY attached to my husband, so things just went along smoothly as before. Then several years ago our beloved cat got very sick and after trying to save her spending +$1000 on care, she died....(cryptocaucus..sp?). We had had her for 13 years and grieved her death. Several month later, a friend gave us another cat - she was beautiful...but annoyed me endlessly! She was whiny...escaped continually (inside cat - I thought). We ended up giving her to another family...but I think what it all came down to is that I was not attached to that cat (the first I had rescued from the SPCA), so everything she did annoyed me. Attachment makes one able to put up with alot! And with a new baby, busy house, spouse etc...there may just not be enough room for you to also be attached to 3 cats too!
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#11 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 05:46 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by motherspeak View Post
We ended up giving her to another family...but I think what it all came down to is that I was not attached to that cat (the first I had rescued from the SPCA), so everything she did annoyed me. Attachment makes one able to put up with alot! And with a new baby, busy house, spouse etc...there may just not be enough room for you to also be attached to 3 cats too!
I think attatchment means a lot....my friend who gave away her remaining after her son was born really never bonded to that cat much. Before that cat she had two older cats (two brothers) and one of them was the "cat love of her life." He was really old when he died, his brother dying a year or so before him. Then she was left with the cat she didn't really like. Then after her son was born she gave her up.

And, I can understand different levels of attatchment here as well. Though I love my remaining geriatric cat, I have never really felt as close to her as I did to my Nicky who passed on last year or even Heaven who is our new adopted cat. She's very reclusive and quiet. I like the more playful, in your face type, outgoing personality. DH however thinks Sammy is great because she "doesn't do much" LOL. My thought is...if you have a cat that doesn't do anything and is hiding most of the time it's like you don't have a cat!

Perpetually breastfeeding or pregnant ENFP mom to a lot of kids...wife to a midwestern nice guy...living in tropical paradise...pink cats and homebirths rock!

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#12 of 12 Old 03-22-2007, 07:32 PM
 
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I think a person does have to know their limits, & if you can find them a better home, it's not unreasonable to rehome something; I was going to try to maintain my small flock of endangered turkeys, & my larger flock of rare breed show chickens - I did downsize a lot beforehand - but when DD actually arrived, I didn't have the time/support to care for a baby & do right by the birds (cleaning, pest control, feed formulation, etc), so they went to people who would appreciate them. I only kept a few layers (went from over 200 birds, to 40, to 15.) DH will help some w/mammals, but is not a bird person.

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