Oh, and I should add that my son spends time with my sister's daughter here at our house or at my parents' house, so he isn't exposed to this stuff that she sees. All of that happens at her house, and we don't go there.
IME with elementary school aged kids, if he's not ready to hear it, he'll forget immediately. And if he has been fed inaccurate info, he'll ask some questions.
Krista; blessed mother to four earthly beings and three non-physical. Basking in my beautiful rainbow.
I gave my 8 year old Its Perfectly Normal -- just left it on his bed. Its pretty in-depth, so that may not be the book you want to choose (it goes into birth control, etc as well as body changes during puberty and the emotional side of sex). In any case, he didn't say anything about it immediately, but then asked very good questions about some of the things he read. I am glad I gave him the information now, and that he learned he could ask me questions about it, before he got all teenage and embarrassed about it. Now we already have a precedent of these conversations and I hope that will lead to more in the future. For my DS, it worked well to give him all the info up front and without comment -- he hates it when I try to "teach" him anything or he goes into a conversation not already "knowing everything" -- he'd rather pretend to just be clarifying a particular point but totally down with the knowledge than be in a position of not knowing. lol And I like knowing that he already has the facts before he gets to an age where he hears things from friends too much. I will do similar with my daughters when they get to the right age.
It's So Amazing!: A Book about Eggs, Sperm, Birth, Babies, and Families
It is recommended for K-4th grade (by the same author "It's Perfectly Normal" for grades 4-8 and "It's Not the Stork" for younger kids). All three cover some of the same topics, with different emphasis and information depending on the age.
I would suggest that sex not be a taboo subject all covered up and weird. Sure, there are age appropriate ways to discuss it, but from as young an age as possible, sex is just another bodily function like poop and potty. We don't talk about poop in certain places, people don't watch us poop, but everybody poops. There isnt anything weird or wrong with it. Everybody has sexual feelings, certain parts of our bodies feel good. Its not a big deal.
What is a HUGE deal, is the responsibility that comes with sex. It is also a huge deal to be respectful of your partner, it is a huge deal to learn about your families values, and it is a huge part of life and relationships. Sex in conversation can come up pretty easily in normal conversation, and can be a comfortable topic to discuss with your kids. The more normal a part of conversation it is, the easier it is going to be to discuss the really important stuff...planned pregnancy, respectful relationships, knowing what "no" means, all that kind of stuff.
You wont have to ask what DS knows, if you know he has the information he needs from you, in context with your families values.
There, that makes it all easier right?
She had all the info about pregnancy (her brother was a home birth, I did self care and she was involved), knew anatomy, knew about sperm and eggs. She just never asked the final "How does it get there?" question.
She started to label kissing, hugging, etc as sex so I thought it was time to define it for her.
She has the info now and I do not regret telling her. I am glad that she is getting the info from me and that she feels comfortable asking questions.
One happy momma to a very spirited little girl , her tough little brother , and a happy little suprise late April 2012 . Wife to an overworked and under paid husband .
I would definitely buy him a book!
Mom to three boys 7/7/00 11/20/02 and 10/29/2011
Writing at: http://paisleymama.blogspot.com/ and other places!
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