video games... - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#91 of 107 Old 06-10-2009, 12:03 PM
 
SandraS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,958
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Absolutely! They're harmless, my kids can regulate their time on them, they get plenty of physical exercise, and my oldest can type almost as fast as I can because of these games!

My 4 year old now enjoys Dora on the Wii - what a great tool for hand-eye coordination.

We love the video games here. I've just found some on the computer that my 17 month old can begin playing soon. As long as we get outside often, eat well, and regulate the time on them (we don't spend 9 hours straight on them, obviously!), the kids can have a great time with them. No harm!

SANDRA, 41 year old VERY laid-back mama to VERY free range kids Brett (16), Justus (11), Autumn (4), and Ayla (1)... four perfect NCB's! :::
SandraS is offline  
#92 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 02:00 AM
 
Tanibani's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Southern California
Posts: 3,052
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm on the anti-video games side.

I disagree with the POV of the link you provided Benj.

What this guy is saying, I would pay more attention to...
TV plays a role in youth violence, expert says

Quote:
"The military conditions human beings to kill using simulators and social conditioning, but it does so with discipline," he said. "We are doing the same thing with video games to children without any of the safeguards."
Here is the gentleman's website:
Killology Research Group

So our son is 9. DH saw his firstborn (my 18 yr old stepson) get completely addicted to video games (tuned out his dad, the world, never developed his own, separate, authentic and useful interests) and we now think it's a colossal waste of time. (I know this is an extreme and there are exceptions of kids getting into computers and doing something constructive with it.)

So thankfully, DH and I agree we will not purchase any game units for home.

DS has neighbors with units and Wii's so he plays there. I used to say "no you can't play" but that didn't last long because DS felt left out. And then some of them use it to tease him "you can't play". It used to burn me up that our next door neighbor (awesome AP mom) has ZERO limits on TV (on all the time) and video game for her son and now I just let it go.

All I tell him is a) nothing violent and nothing rated for adults and b) be sensible - don't play for over an hour. Limit yourself to 30 minutes. Do the best you can. Don't play for hours on end. He gets it.

Those boys do get sucked in. A preschool teacher told me that she learned of some research (sorry I can't cite it) that when boys (especially) start playing video games, it doesn't help to teach their brains to PLAN AHEAD. It's all about immediate gratification. That is scary and not something I want to encourage in our home.

I don't even let my kids play computer games at home. (Again, I don't want them down the rabbit hole.) I would LOVE to find some sort of educational game, but really, I prefer real life.

Though I do concede that some computer programs have educational value. I get that.

So in order for it to be less of a "forbidden fruit" they do play when they are out (Chuckie Cheese - I HATE that they have violent games there - and of course DS wants to play them all) and the public library has computer consoles where the kids play and my DD will play Max and Ruby games.

10 - boy
5.5 - girl
Tanibani is offline  
#93 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:03 AM - Thread Starter
 
benj's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: arizona
Posts: 278
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I would disagree that violent video games inherently cause violence. Violence isn't a brand new thing and I don't think seeing violence is the problem. The more serious problem is that somewhere along the line, children see violence as a solution and a way to solve a problem and that's what's sending the bad message. I would prefer my kids to watch movies that are not violent and participate in non-violent things. But violence is part of the world we live in, and I cannot shelter them from that. Dylan Klebold (one of the Columbine shooters) grew up in a home where his mother previewed all his video games and movies and did not let him watch the ones that were deemed "too violent," his parents banned guns (even toy guns), both his parents were pacifists...anti-war, anti-violence, did not believe in spanking, etc. It is the people with the problems, not the inanimate objects they possess. However, as I've said, my sons and their personalities would not mix well with video games. I'm much more worried that they will get "sucked in" more than the violence issue. I much prefer the path that my older one is going on now where he is starting to get interested in different sports because it is something I enjoy as well.

two amazing sons & .
benj is offline  
#94 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:13 AM
 
SandraS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,958
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Interesting. There were police officers that came to our son's school and said video games don't cause violent behavior. I believe them.

Frankly, if a kid gets a gun and shoots someone, something was wrong with him LOONNNG before he played Grand Theft Auto.

I grew up with the Lone Ranger and Road Runner. Never once did I want to get an Acme bomb and blow up someone.

It takes a sick person to kill or hurt someone. A video game cannot be held responsible. Just like "my mother beat me" or "my mother told me there's no Santa Claus" can't be a viable excuse in court either.

Crazy is as crazy does.

JMO, of course. Except for the police offers that said, NOPE. Not related!

SANDRA, 41 year old VERY laid-back mama to VERY free range kids Brett (16), Justus (11), Autumn (4), and Ayla (1)... four perfect NCB's! :::
SandraS is offline  
#95 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:24 AM - Thread Starter
 
benj's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: arizona
Posts: 278
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by SandraS View Post
Interesting. There were police officers that came to our son's school and said video games don't cause violent behavior. I believe them.

Frankly, if a kid gets a gun and shoots someone, something was wrong with him LOONNNG before he played Grand Theft Auto.

I grew up with the Lone Ranger and Road Runner. Never once did I want to get an Acme bomb and blow up someone.

It takes a sick person to kill or hurt someone. A video game cannot be held responsible. Just like "my mother beat me" or "my mother told me there's no Santa Claus" can't be a viable excuse in court either.

Crazy is as crazy does.

JMO, of course. Except for the police offers that said, NOPE. Not related!
True, people respond and react to situations different ways. I would honestly much rather have a violent person virtually killing people than he/she actually going out and committing the act.

two amazing sons & .
benj is offline  
#96 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:28 AM
 
marybethorama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Western MD
Posts: 3,564
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamazee View Post
Not even adults only do things that have a purpose. For kids, even less of what they do really has a purpose. Tons of what kids do is just for fun. Is that really a goal for you - for everything they do to have a purpose?
This really hits home with me. When I was a teen I loved to read Regency Romances and teen mags. Completely worthless but fun. In fact I still read trashy mags for fun. I also read (and still do) tons of literature and good non-fiction.

I think even the trashy reading helped my SAT score (the books have a good vocabulary if nothing else )
marybethorama is offline  
#97 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:30 AM
 
SandraS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,958
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by marybethorama View Post
This really hits home with me. When I was a teen I loved to read Regency Romances and teen mags. Completely worthless but fun. In fact I still read trashy mags for fun. I also read (and still do) tons of literature and good non-fiction.

I think even the trashy reading helped my SAT score (the books have a good vocabulary if nothing else )
You know, my boy's vocabulary, typing, and reading skills all increased tenfold when they began playing online role-playing games. So there, they had a purpose. LOL

SANDRA, 41 year old VERY laid-back mama to VERY free range kids Brett (16), Justus (11), Autumn (4), and Ayla (1)... four perfect NCB's! :::
SandraS is offline  
#98 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
benj's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: arizona
Posts: 278
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by marybethorama View Post
This really hits home with me. When I was a teen I loved to read Regency Romances and teen mags. Completely worthless but fun. In fact I still read trashy mags for fun. I also read (and still do) tons of literature and good non-fiction.

I think even the trashy reading helped my SAT score (the books have a good vocabulary if nothing else )
well if you enjoy doing it, then that's it's purpose.

videogames i do not enjoy so they have no value to me.

two amazing sons & .
benj is offline  
#99 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:31 AM
 
Theoretica's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Inside my head (it's quiet here!)
Posts: 3,825
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by SandraS View Post
Absolutely! They're harmless, my kids can regulate their time on them, they get plenty of physical exercise, and my oldest can type almost as fast as I can because of these games!

My 4 year old now enjoys Dora on the Wii - what a great tool for hand-eye coordination.

We love the video games here. I've just found some on the computer that my 17 month old can begin playing soon. As long as we get outside often, eat well, and regulate the time on them (we don't spend 9 hours straight on them, obviously!), the kids can have a great time with them. No harm!
Just out of curiousity...NOT attacking or anything...I just don't understand?

There's a ton of documented research that screen time at ALL prior to around age 3 is seriously detrimental to their verbal & cognitive development. How do you reconcile that with letting an 18mos baby play vgs?

I seriously don't want you to feel attacked at my asking, so it's genuinely NOT the intent.

GOOD moms let their kids lick the beaters. GREAT moms turn off the mixer first!
Humanist Woman Wife , & Friend Plus Mama to 6 (3 mos, 2, 9, 13, 17, 20)
Theoretica is offline  
#100 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:32 AM
 
mamazee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: US midwest
Posts: 7,500
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by benj View Post
well if you enjoy doing it, then that's it's purpose.

videogames i do not enjoy so they have no value to me.
So if your kids enjoy them, they'll have a purpose? As I recall, your kids are too young for you to know if they'll like video games or not.
mamazee is offline  
#101 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:35 AM
 
SandraS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,958
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Theoretica View Post
Just out of curiousity...NOT attacking or anything...I just don't understand?

There's a ton of documented research that screen time at ALL prior to around age 3 is seriously detrimental to their verbal & cognitive development. How do you reconcile that with letting an 18mos baby play vgs?

I seriously don't want you to feel attacked at my asking, so it's genuinely NOT the intent.
Because I don't believe it. My whole family grew up with televisions and Ataris. None of us have twitches.

My 15 year old grew up that way and he exceeds all of his state tests, he's on the honor roll, he plays sports and musical instruments, etc. Lotta damage done by watching Barney a few times at the age of 2, I'd say!! LOL! My 11 year old is on the same path... and so will my 4 year old and my 1 year old. No doubt about it.

I just don't buy it. I think using the TV as a babysitter 6 hours a day may cause problems, but I know watching a show or playing a video game every once in a while is HARMLESS. Period.

In my house. What you do is up to you!

SANDRA, 41 year old VERY laid-back mama to VERY free range kids Brett (16), Justus (11), Autumn (4), and Ayla (1)... four perfect NCB's! :::
SandraS is offline  
#102 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:38 AM - Thread Starter
 
benj's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: arizona
Posts: 278
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamazee View Post
So if your kids enjoy them, they'll have a purpose? As I recall, your kids are too young for you to know if they'll like video games or not.
I suppose. An outright ban on video games is not my intention. If they enjoy them, they can enjoy them elsewhere, not in my home. Since I don't enjoy video games, this is not something that I would really encourage...but I wouldn't get upset if they did enjoy them. I'd much rather bond with my kids using different mediums. My whole point of asking the question was to see different perspectives: I was not trying to convince people of anything, and I am VERY open-minded, really.

two amazing sons & .
benj is offline  
#103 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:41 AM
 
mamazee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: US midwest
Posts: 7,500
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by benj View Post
I suppose. An outright ban on video games is not my intention. If they enjoy them, they can enjoy them elsewhere, not in my home. Since I don't enjoy video games, this is not something that I would really encourage...but I wouldn't get upset if they did enjoy them. I'd much rather bond with my kids using different mediums. My whole point of asking the question was to see different perspectives: I was not trying to convince people of anything, and I am VERY open-minded, really.
Your home is also their home. What if they want them and have their own money somehow (like from a grandparent) to buy them? Or if they're bought a video game system as a gift and want to keep it?
mamazee is offline  
#104 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 10:44 AM - Thread Starter
 
benj's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: arizona
Posts: 278
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamazee View Post
Your home is also their home. What if they want them and have their own money somehow (like from a grandparent) to buy them? Or if they're bought a video game system as a gift and want to keep it?
I doubt anyone would give it to them as a gift. But if it's their money, then sure although I would hope they'd spend their money on different things. Alas, I can't control everything. However, I'm not providing this for them.

two amazing sons & .
benj is offline  
#105 of 107 Old 06-11-2009, 12:33 PM
 
GuildJenn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 4,776
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Theoretica View Post
Just out of curiousity...NOT attacking or anything...I just don't understand?

There's a ton of documented research that screen time at ALL prior to around age 3 is seriously detrimental to their verbal & cognitive development. How do you reconcile that with letting an 18mos baby play vgs?

I seriously don't want you to feel attacked at my asking, so it's genuinely NOT the intent.
I'm not sure the body of research really comes down to "all screen time before 3 is seriously detrimental." There are so many problems with doing studies on kids because:

1. You can't really put kids in front of the TV 12 hours a day and measure it
2. It's hard to control for all the different factors, like which parents are likely to put their kids in front of the TV
3. What the screen time is about might be really important but I don't think most studies have been able to address this.
4. Media changes pretty quickly. To get a little bit back to the original question, video games today really are quite different than Tetris (which actually is/was a pretty nifty game in some ways).

I'm not sure there have been really good studies that could prove causation. There have been some interesting correlative ones, but a lot of them have been pretty well criticized.

I know that there is a body of thought that all screen time is awful, and actually as a broadcast-free family with a limited library of DVDs, I definitely took that under advisement in our choices. However I have to say that they can pry my Signing Time and Popular Mechanics for Kids and BBC Earth DVDs out of my dead hands before I would take those out of my child's life at this point. And we did start ST at just over a year old.

Having read up on this for literally years, starting when I was teaching reading and there was some thought that TV basically knocks out higher-level thought so that kids don't learn to read fluently (not something that really panned out in a big cultural way), I'm not convinced that we really know for sure yet.

You can't feed kids pesticide-laden apples, cheese whiz, red dye and aspartame, prevent them from going outside, and stick them in front of the TV and then do a study and say it's the TV that caused them to become diagnosed ADHD - when ADHD diagnosis didn't even exist commonly 30 years ago.

It's really not like mixing DEET into the milk.

~ Mum to Emily, March 12-16 2004, Noah, born Aug 2005, Liam, born January 2011, and wife to Carl since 1994. ~
GuildJenn is offline  
#106 of 107 Old 05-29-2012, 03:35 PM
 
M S E's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 4
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

i totaly agree @sandara s, i am a gamer, and i allow my son to play an hour a day (on weekdays) after school work is done, and 3 hours on the weekend... only games rated E (for everyone) or lower. NO shooters or rpgs.....and BTW my son is on honor roll. SO NO,VIDEO GAMES DO NOT RUIN YOUR KIDS, VIDEOS GAMES ARE FINE IN MODERATION.
 

M S E is offline  
#107 of 107 Old 05-30-2012, 10:46 AM
 
cateerob's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: uk
Posts: 21
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

my 18 yr ds and 15 yr dd have  been playing games since they were very young not my choice but  my ex had every game system going, i have never regulated the amount of time they play when they were pre school age they were bored after 30mins then when they were older  as long as homework and chores were done they were free to do what they wanted until bedtime, some weekends  they had a new game they would play all day, and sometimes they would not play for weeks that pattern has continued for my 18 yr ds,  my dd has lost interest few years ago  but sometimes plays her DS a long journey..i don't think it did them any harm when they were younger i would often play with them and the games they played were age appropriate. I think playing   games on a console  is alot safer for kids than browsing the Internet, and much better for them to using thier minds rather than slumped on the sofa watching cartoons/tv

 

Also my son had two friends who were not allowed to have games at home but their parents didn't mind them playing in my house, those boys seemed to spend most of their free time here and would be upset when my son said lets go out on our bikes as all they wanted to do was play with the wii/xbox.

 

All that said it is your home and your choice if you dont want them to play games in your house but good luck putting that argument to teenagers..

cateerob is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off