Finding my footing as "the mom" and getting the message through to my mom - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 1 Old 08-20-2009, 06:38 PM - Thread Starter
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I was reading another post about ILS and I am having similar problems, but mine are partially self inflicted unfortunately.

I don't have a good relationship with my mom, I used to be as a kid but things have disintigrated.

So when I was preg. with my dd I was living in the same town as my grandparents and inadvertently this brought my mom into my life more than I could handle because they are her parents. There were a lot of phone calls and a lot of questions and I felt like my privacy was being invaded. Luckily I had the whole pregnant thing working to my hormonal advantage because I didn't hav a hard time saying it was time for DH and I to hit the road and move back to our hometown so that we could preserve our privacy and take some control over our own lives for the time being. I felt very motherly and glad about the decision.
When my dd was several months old and we had been back living in our hometown for about a year there was an incident that forced us to move out of our aprtment for our on safety(it was a violent act involving a gun). We moved in with friends one town over. My mom soon convinced me to come live near here. I gave in because around the same time my husband needed surgery and his work prospects were not good for the next few months atleast.
We moved to be closer to my parents and now I am really regretting it but I don't know how to introduce the idea that we are back on our feet and need to be moving on again. My mom alreadyt hinks I am very irresponsible for not living he same kind of life she has chosen. I feel like if I tell her this now it is going to cause major drama and she won't approve. I wouldn't need her approval, but we bought this house together and to sell I would have to have her agree as well.

I know I just have to suck it up but I need encouragement, wise words, stories, anything anyone has to offer would I'm sure be helpful!
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