Visiting friends for the weekend who eat very unhealthy - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Please don't think i am a judgemental snob! We are not perfect. We eat junk. even fast food on occasion I am NOT the parent who doesn't let her child have sweets, white bread on occasion, stuff at bbqs, picnics, etc. We do the best we can but I am not super strict.

But I have some things that are off limits. And we are visiting friends we don't see but once a year this coming weekend. And they eat on a regular basis ALL of my forbidden foods! I really get anxiety about this, as i don't want my kids to eat the stuff, but also don't want to be offensive. I usually do bring some snacks and fruit for the road, and then give them some if theres any left over, and this hasn't been a problem in the past...but I am just so torn. i usually sit there and chant in my head: "this one time won't kill them" over and over, lol. What would you do?

These are the foods I am speaking of:

Very low quality hot dogs (EVERY day for lunch)
Jiffy pop (12 grams of trans fat per CUP)
Fizzy drinks (like alka seltzer, but turns into a neon sugary nastiness with about 6 different dyes, chemicals, and no recognizeable ingredients)
Pancakes with trans fat margarine and sugar free (aspartame) syrup

Should I just let it go?

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#2 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:08 PM
 
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I'd let it go. It's one weekend out of your family's whole lives.
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#3 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:10 PM
 
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It's one weekend Everyone will survive. Suggest going out to eat....or your family will take a turn to make a meal for everyone.

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#4 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:16 PM
 
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I'd let it go too, but it if really bothers you tell them that in return for hosting your family, you'd love to cook a couple of meals during the visit. Then bring or buy your own healthy ingredients. They'd probably appreciate the effort and you'll know your kids had at least a few healthy meals that weekend.
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#5 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:22 PM
 
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Ditto everyone else, unless you have allergies and can justify intervening.

Except the syrup. YIK. I would (and have) bring a jug of real maple syrup as a house gift. I've even called myself a syrup snob when I've prsented it/used it. You could even bring a whole pancake breakfast as a hostess gift - include a buckwheat pancake mix, TF sausage, maybe bring along your waffle iron and offer to make them with the children. (I've done this, too, as I am a pancake snob, goes with the syrup, I guess!)

If breakfast isn't your thing, you might do this with another meal. I've brought along the ingredients for Moosewood Chili (Red, Black, Green and Gold, if you want to google the recipe) and offered to assemble it for Friday night's dinner. This assures me at least one good meal, and if I make a large enough batch, there will be leftovers for Saturday lunch (for at least myself and, in this case, a child or 2 of mine!).

ETA - Areia - you beat me to the post. You posted while I was prattling on about syrup.

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#6 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:22 PM
 
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Let it go. The one thing I might do is bring sandwich stuff for lunches but my kids absolutely hate hot dogs.

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#7 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:23 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amila View Post
Jiffy pop (12 grams of trans fat per CUP)
Pancakes with ... sugar free (aspartame) syrup
The juxtaposition of those two things just cracks me up.

That food does sound gross, but I agree to let it go. It sounds like that's what you've done in the past, right? Maybe stop at a roadside fruit stand and stock up, then rave about the great deals and how yummy everything looked so you bought enough for everyone for the weekend. My mom always does that when she visits me, and I never think anything of it (and we keep lots of healthy food in the house, so I know she's not trying to send me a message ).

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#8 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:27 PM
 
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Is it possible that this is their go-to convenience food since they're about to have house guests? I know when we have people over, my husband always argues for easy, heat and eat type snacks and food and I have to talk him down. Perhaps if you said ahead of time, hey, I'd like to trade off meals with you, how about I do one b'fast, one lunch, one dinner and bring some snacks?

Otherwise, I'd let it go and keep chanting, it's just a weekend, it's just a weekend.
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#9 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:30 PM
 
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I'd let it go. It's one weekend, and not worth the hurt feelings. If it were me, I'd probably ask for something else for the kids to drink, like water, but that's about it.

What is Jiffy pop?

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#10 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:31 PM
 
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I would personally have a really hard time letting it go. So don't feel bad if you do too.

How many meals are we talking about? If it was just a couple, maybe I could let it slide and talk myself down in my head , but if we're talking about a FULL weekend of meals, I would definitely bring some food along and just present it as this is what my kids like and such.

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#11 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:37 PM
 
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Well, I wouldn't be able to let it go, especially the hot dogs. I would call them ahead of time and say that some of the foods they eat you and your kids don't eat/like and ask if they have any alternatives, or if you could buy some groceries once you get there and ask to store them in the fridge. I know its only a weekend, but it could make your kids sick if they don't have this type of food, I know it would make me sick with my sensative stomach and being sensative to artificial foods.
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#12 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:38 PM
 
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I'd pretty much let it go, but I would also offer to cook some meals while you are there. We're going out of town with my in-laws for a week. MIL asked what my kids would eat and we told her, but then she mentioned getting hot dogs to be cut in the mac & cheese (boxed.) Now I don't mind hot dogs or boxed mac & cheese, but I did let her know that those things weren't necessary for the kids. She's cooking dinner 3 times and I'll cook it 3 times. Lunch will probably be mac & cheese or sandwhiches. And I'm okay with them eating crap (well crapier things than I already buy since I am far from perfect in the food department) for a week.

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#13 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:38 PM
 
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What is Jiffy pop?
It's popcorn you pop on the stove top. I had no idea they even still made it. When we were kids, it was a huge treat because it pops up into a big tin foil ball. Sort of.
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#14 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:38 PM
 
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I am not a food snob either but I could not let the fake syrup (I am from Vermont-no way we have that stuff), and Jiffy pop go. Everything else I would not sweat.

I would bring real syrup and offer to cook breakfast like Areia suggested. Also, instead of Jiffy Pop maybe you could make kettle corn to bring along instead?
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#15 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:41 PM
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I didn't know that there were any hotdogs that were actually good

The syrup thing would drive me crazy and I would definitely bring my own of that but I am a self confessed syrup snob. I didn't know Jiffy Pop was so full of fat, I used to love that as a treat when I was a kid.

I'd say bring what you want your kids to eat and just say they are particular about snacks etc..Whats the harm in that?
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#16 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:49 PM
 
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I'd probably let it go since it's just the weekend. I'd definitely insist on cooking a couple of the meals as a kind gesture for them hosting you. They may be relieved.

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#17 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 12:54 PM
 
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Does a cup of popped Jiffy Pop even weigh 12 grams? How could it have 12 grams of fat in it?!

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#18 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:05 PM
 
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When we visit friends, we always offer to cook a meal or two and to take them out for dinner as a thank you for their hospitality. Bring along your favourite granola and tell them that they just HAVE to try it, lol! Bringing a big fruit basket from the market sounds like a great idea. The farmer's markets are amazing this time of year.

You may still have to endure some unhealthy meals, but at least they won't all be like that.
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#19 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't remember buy i know the last time I looked at nutrition facts for it I was horrified. Here are the ingredients:

Popcorn, partially hydrogenated soybean oil, less than 2% of: salt, hydrogenated cottonseed oil, natural flavor, color added, freshness preserved with TBHQ, methyl silicone.

I have too much time on my hands!

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#20 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:16 PM
 
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Agreed that offering to cook a meal or take everyone out as a treat/thank-you is a good idea.

Otherwise, one weekend isn't going to kill anyone.

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#21 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:16 PM
 
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Originally Posted by ASusan View Post
Ditto everyone else, unless you have allergies and can justify intervening.

Except the syrup. YIK. I would (and have) bring a jug of real maple syrup as a house gift. I've even called myself a syrup snob when I've prsented it/used it. You could even bring a whole pancake breakfast as a hostess gift - include a buckwheat pancake mix, TF sausage, maybe bring along your waffle iron and offer to make them with the children. (I've done this, too, as I am a pancake snob, goes with the syrup, I guess!)

If breakfast isn't your thing, you might do this with another meal. I've brought along the ingredients for Moosewood Chili (Red, Black, Green and Gold, if you want to google the recipe) and offered to assemble it for Friday night's dinner. This assures me at least one good meal, and if I make a large enough batch, there will be leftovers for Saturday lunch (for at least myself and, in this case, a child or 2 of mine!).

ETA - Areia - you beat me to the post. You posted while I was prattling on about syrup.
This is such a nice way of doing it!
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#22 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:25 PM
 
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Originally Posted by JennTheMomma View Post
Well, I wouldn't be able to let it go, especially the hot dogs. I would call them ahead of time and say that some of the foods they eat you and your kids don't eat/like and ask if they have any alternatives, or if you could buy some groceries once you get there and ask to store them in the fridge. I know its only a weekend, but it could make your kids sick if they don't have this type of food, I know it would make me sick with my sensative stomach and being sensative to artificial foods.
It would be nice if our culture allowed such honesty without hurt feelings but I bet this could cause some awkwardness. I like the idea of bringing food along for a "thank-you" meal. I wouldn't allow my kids to have artificial sugar but I would probably cringe through the rest of it.
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#23 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:41 PM
 
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Sorry, I couldn't resist looking at the NI for Jiffy pop. Looks like there are 10g of transfats in the whole pan not one cup. I think others are spot on with their advice - try to be a gracious guest just for one weekend, but do offer to cook something. Maybe come up with some meals in mind that you can make more along your comfort lines but won't be received as holier-than-thou, IYKWIM? Like instead of super cheap hot-dogs, maybe some subltly all-beef franks? I think if you get too far out there, it could be cause hurt and awkwardness.

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#24 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:48 PM
 
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I'd bring (or buy there) my own food for breakfast and lunch and try to suffer through dinner with the "it won't kill us" attitude and I'd tell my kids no if they asked for things I didn't want them to have. I'm pretty picky about food though and I *do* believe some of those things kill people.......

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#25 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:49 PM
 
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Bring a fruit basket and some maple syrup, and take the family out for lunch one day to some place healthy to thank them for hosting your family.

Other than that, one weekend is not even going to harm you, unless any of you are easily constipated. My son gets constipated very easily if we don't eat well enough while on vacation, so I make sure to bring lots of raw fruit, veggies, raisins, etc., for him to snack on.
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#26 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:51 PM
 
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I'm not super strict, but 2 of the things really jump out at me. I could probably look past the drink once, but not more than that. I would bring back up drinks or insist upon water.

The aspartame is a huge NO for me. Not a chance would I let my kids eat that. I would either take my own syrup or have something else for my kids to eat.

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#27 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:57 PM
 
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I'd let it go. It's one weekend, and not worth the hurt feelings. If it were me, I'd probably ask for something else for the kids to drink, like water, but that's about it.

What is Jiffy pop?
It must be like a peanut butter soda.

Took me awhile to remember what it was also.LOL It's popcorn I think.

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#28 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 01:59 PM
 
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I make my mom get real syrup for when we visit It's one of my main requests on a very short list, but she can't believe the price.

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#29 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 02:09 PM
 
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Originally Posted by ollyoxenfree View Post
When we visit friends, we always offer to cook a meal or two and to take them out for dinner as a thank you for their hospitality. Bring along your favourite granola and tell them that they just HAVE to try it, lol! Bringing a big fruit basket from the market sounds like a great idea. The farmer's markets are amazing this time of year.

You may still have to endure some unhealthy meals, but at least they won't all be like that.
I like this approach. I guess I'm a jerk but there's no way I could endure an entire weekend of eating that crap. One meal, maybe. As many as nine meals? Not a chance. Junk food makes me feel terrible and there's no way I'd eat in a way that I know would make me feel physically sick just to be polite.

I'd show up bearing a basket of healthy food like fruit and real syrup and maybe some local cider or something to replace the mystery powder sugar water. We always bring hostess gifts when we stay with friends and family anyway, so it wouldn't raise any suspicions--but if it did, oh well.

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#30 of 86 Old 09-24-2009, 02:13 PM
 
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I also think it would be extremely gracious if you go grocery shopping and make a big breakfast one day for everyone and a nice dinner another night. It would be a nice thank you and a way of getting some real food into your children.

I loooove Jiffy Pop. I will have to pick some up soon. We only had it about once a year growing up but it was always so special to me. Thanks for reminding me of that stuff!

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