please help, dont judge. - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

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#91 of 106 Old 10-23-2009, 04:31 PM
 
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I'm sorry the people on the parenting site were so horrible to you. Stuff happens sometimes, you know? Doesn't mean you're a bad person.

If you're happy with your boyfriend and the little family the two of you have together, then I see no reason to shake it up. And if your family is going to be acting in ways that are destructive to that, then I think a little distance is in order.

Anna , partner to Chad geek.gif , mommy to Aidan (10/12/04) and Nate (07/18/06) fencing.gif , and Violet fairy.gif(10/23/07) .

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#92 of 106 Old 10-23-2009, 04:53 PM
 
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adorable baby!! good luck, momma!
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#93 of 106 Old 10-23-2009, 06:27 PM
 
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Go to familydna.com. You can test the babies y chromosone and find his genetic history and deduce from that if his paternal ancestory is black or asian. Uh oh, is your child a son? if its a girl, then you can only find the maternal history.

Sorry if i am repeating info, i did not read all the posts....hth

Maya
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#94 of 106 Old 10-24-2009, 12:25 AM
 
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OMG, that is one cute baby. And I, too, would place all of my money on your current bf.

Also, mama- and this may not be a popular opinion- I wouldn't be too quick to spill the beans about that drunken maybe-hook-up with the Asian guy. I think a big part of why you doubt your man's paternity might be guilt about that other night? If you were on your period then and had been having daily sex with your bf without protection, I say it is simply soooo much more likely that your daughter is your bf's that I wouldn't worry about it.

I mean, if you feel that you were unfaithful to him, then make an effort to change that in the future and work on the aspects of yourself and your relationship that led you to hook up with someone else. But don't tell him something that will cast fear, doubt and anger into your little family together without being absolutely certain that there is a reason to do so- think about how this will affect your daughter, as well.

No judgment from me, btw! And to hell with anyone who sits on a high horse...

mummy to one sweet, beautiful, strong, clever, perfect
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#95 of 106 Old 10-24-2009, 01:08 AM
 
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I just got drawn into this thread by looking at your pictures. The one below could be my ds2. I even asked my husband and he thought so, too. It looks so similar to pictures of my son about that age. Not scientific, I know, but for what it's worth my son is 1/2 black, 1/2 white. He has light skin, brown eyes and curly blondish hair, although it was dark and straight for the first several months. I keep clicking on the link because the resemblance is really quite uncanny.

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Originally Posted by angelbaby1788 View Post
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#96 of 106 Old 10-24-2009, 01:39 AM
 
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Another "I think it's Victor's".

Also, your family doesn't know anything about genetic presentation if they think that a 1/2 white 1/2 black baby can't have white skin or "look white". And as far as I can tell, I bet her features will become clearer as she gets older.

Finally, she's just beautiful!!!!!!

Early intervention specialist and parent consultant since 2002.
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#97 of 106 Old 10-24-2009, 01:53 AM
 
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My DH is Korean and our kiddos are 1/2 white and 1/2 Korean.

I don't think your daughter is Korean

She's SO FREAKING CUTE though!!!

Good luck mama, I hope you stick around MDC! There's lots of support here, and plenty to learn about this awesome adventure of parenting.


GOOD moms let their kids lick the beaters. GREAT moms turn off the mixer first!
Humanist Woman Wife , & Friend Plus Mama to 6 (3 mos, 2, 9, 13, 17, 20)
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#98 of 106 Old 10-24-2009, 04:15 AM
 
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My DH's cousins are half black and half white. His female cousin has very light mocha (or possibly more like cafe au lait) skin and actually looks slightly Asian to me, although she's not actually Asian at all. Her younger brother has much darker skin and more typical AA features. So, I think there is a fairly wide range when it comes to what mixed race babies look like. Your daughter is gorgeous - enjoy her!

Anne wife to Phil & mama to Katie
Velvet Blue ::: Seattle Baby/Child/Family Portraits
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#99 of 106 Old 10-24-2009, 09:36 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Proud2BeAnAmerican View Post
Why not obtain a DNA test so that your daughter can know who her father is and you can get support?

Kill two (or three) birds with one stone.

Proud *single* mom to 3 amazing kiddos
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#100 of 106 Old 10-24-2009, 09:48 AM
 
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Oh hunny ((BIG BIG HUGS))....

Welcome to MDC. LEt me tell you first off I was legally married and very back and forth when conceived my daughters Abrielle is 2 and Annalise is 3 months). Because I was seeing other people as well as my husband (all involved knew) I did not know if DD 2 was his (DD1 is DEF not his). I did the DNA test. I used the one from the pharmacy and it was relatively cheap a total of 150$ and got results quickly. Your not a bad person, in fact this happens more than people want to let on, better your honest than just pretend that it never happened.

For what it's worth, your daughter looks African American. She also resembles the AA man. If you had sex on your period, it is highly unlikely you were ovulating, too.
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#101 of 106 Old 10-24-2009, 09:50 AM
 
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Your sweet daughter has her daddy's nose. In my opinion, she looks a lot like him.

Mama, Painter, Special Needs Coordinator
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#102 of 106 Old 10-24-2009, 09:53 AM
 
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Originally Posted by angelbaby1788 View Post
Thank you.
I got a Home DNA that i ordered but my grandma said these dont work.
Grandma is wrong, they test for the same genetic markers that my court one did (actually more markers than my court one).
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#103 of 106 Old 10-26-2009, 10:31 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Im scared i might do the test wrong because my daughter wont let me put the q-tip near her mouth
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#104 of 106 Old 10-26-2009, 10:40 AM
 
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Honey, just wait until she's playing and being silly. Tickle her and when she opens her mouth do a quick swab of the cheek. That's all it takes!

Keep us posted, good luck!

GOOD moms let their kids lick the beaters. GREAT moms turn off the mixer first!
Humanist Woman Wife , & Friend Plus Mama to 6 (3 mos, 2, 9, 13, 17, 20)
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#105 of 106 Old 10-26-2009, 01:47 PM
 
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Welcome to MDC! I hope you decide to stick around and post in some of the other forums!
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#106 of 106 Old 10-26-2009, 02:06 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by angelbaby1788 View Post
Im scared i might do the test wrong because my daughter wont let me put the q-tip near her mouth
I do things like that (trimming finger and toe nails, etc) while DS is sleeping. Just make sure she's in a good deep sleep.

Timmy's Mommy WARNINGyslexic typing with help of preschooler, beware of typos
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