What is the worst/dumbest thing anyone has ever said to you about parenting stuff? V - Page 11 - Mothering Forums

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Old 06-07-2010, 03:51 PM
 
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"put a hat on the baby or they will catch a cold!"
I've had several older woman walk up to me and tell me that DD was cold because she didn't have a hat on, no matter the temperature outside. Fascinates me that they can tell she's cold from across the room (or parking lot!) but the parent holding her doesn't have a clue...

Same with the people who inform me DD is hot and/or uncomfortable when she's in her carrier.

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Old 06-07-2010, 04:04 PM
 
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Same with the people who inform me DD is hot and/or uncomfortable when she's in her carrier.
That doesn't bother me because I have no problem correcting nosy people, loudly and firmly.

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Old 06-07-2010, 06:13 PM
 
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I've had several older woman walk up to me and tell me that DD was cold because she didn't have a hat on, no matter the temperature outside. Fascinates me that they can tell she's cold from across the room (or parking lot!) but the parent holding her doesn't have a clue...

Same with the people who inform me DD is hot and/or uncomfortable when she's in her carrier.
Therefore, if all those people are correct, babies are only comfortable and at a safe temperature if you carry them in a hat with a baby carrier draped over their head.
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Old 06-07-2010, 06:28 PM
 
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The really sad thing about the people making mean remarks about kids with dolls of a race different than theirs is, what does it say about how they feel about mixed race adoptions and marriages??

One of dd's dollies is of color (probably AA, but the hair makes it hard to be sure) one is white. If someone comments rudely, I plan to look at them like they're being silly and say very slowly "you do know that she didn't actually give birth to dolls, right? She also cuddles a giraffe with a bell in it's tummy and a zebra filled with beans."
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Old 06-07-2010, 08:16 PM
 
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One of dd's dollies is of color (probably AA, but the hair makes it hard to be sure) one is white. If someone comments rudely, I plan to look at them like they're being silly and say very slowly "you do know that she didn't actually give birth to dolls, right? She also cuddles a giraffe with a bell in it's tummy and a zebra filled with beans."
ROTFL! Too funny.

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Old 06-08-2010, 03:27 AM
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Argh, the racist comments make me mad!

I am getting really really tired of all the gender propoganda being thrown at us. My parents love to buy my DD purses and baby dolls (she's 16mo) and then they get angry when DS wants to carry a purse around. DS is very interested in girly things right now. I took him to look at shoes the other day and he LOVED some gold and sparkly flip flops. The sales lady came over and said "You know, we do HAVE boy shoes." I said "I know, he likes the sparkly ones. Thank you!" And she walked away in a huff.

Today he was wearing a neighbor girls' flowery flip flops around (she is 8 and just dotes on both my kids). Her younger sister was yelling at him "STOP! YOU CAN'T WEAR THOSE SHOES! THEY ARE FOR GIIIIIIIRRRRLLLLLSSSS!" I thought she was going to break down, she was so upset about it. I said "Your sister said he can wear them. He likes them. And they fit him just fine, so why are they just for girls?" and she said "Because they're for girls." Best. logic. ever.
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Old 06-08-2010, 08:57 AM
 
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The sales lady came over and said "You know, we do HAVE boy shoes." I said "I know, he likes the sparkly ones. Thank you!" And she walked away in a huff.

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Old 06-09-2010, 03:10 AM
 
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you know even my DH has stopped with the negative baby-doll comments. I think the "well he *might* be a DADDY some day" kind of shut him up. (that and we now have a dd too...so I guess there's an 'excuse' to have them around?)

The children in question are tan, with brown eyes and curly brown hair. We currently have a couple white dolls, and ONE cabbage patch I found that actually has curly brown hair, complexion similar to DD's and the brown eyes. Also a newborn with no hair but "matched" to them. Why? well, because you can't find tan baby dolls with curls. Even a lot of the dark-skinned AA baby dolls have straight hair.

WHY, doll people, would I want to buy my child this and start her thinking 'straight hair is better hair?' grrr...

(there *is* more diversity in the little people collection in our house...need to work on the babies maybe. I just have a 'thing' about the ones that look like they've got the chemically straight hair....)

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Old 06-09-2010, 05:51 AM
 
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Haha yeah I don't understand that either. My SIL came to DS's bday party and I was sitting there BF'ing as usual and she went into my bedroom to feed her DS. Come to think of it, the very last time I saw them (last month) was the first time I ever saw her BF... and her son is 9 months old!!! (Can you IMAGINE going to another room to BF every. single. time? I'd go insane! )
When DS1 was a couple months old (he's 20 now!) my grandmother wondered how on earth I managed to never nurse him when we were around her. He was nursing when she asked that! I just lifted my shirt a little and she got it.

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Old 06-09-2010, 08:25 AM
 
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When DS1 was a couple months old (he's 20 now!) my grandmother wondered how on earth I managed to never nurse him when we were around her. He was nursing when she asked that! I just lifted my shirt a little and she got it.
Hahaha!

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Old 06-09-2010, 01:16 PM
 
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When DS1 was a couple months old (he's 20 now!) my grandmother wondered how on earth I managed to never nurse him when we were around her. He was nursing when she asked that! I just lifted my shirt a little and she got it.
awesome

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Old 06-09-2010, 01:27 PM
 
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you know even my DH has stopped with the negative baby-doll comments. I think the "well he *might* be a DADDY some day" kind of shut him up. (that and we now have a dd too...so I guess there's an 'excuse' to have them around?)

The children in question are tan, with brown eyes and curly brown hair. We currently have a couple white dolls, and ONE cabbage patch I found that actually has curly brown hair, complexion similar to DD's and the brown eyes. Also a newborn with no hair but "matched" to them. Why? well, because you can't find tan baby dolls with curls. Even a lot of the dark-skinned AA baby dolls have straight hair.

WHY, doll people, would I want to buy my child this and start her thinking 'straight hair is better hair?' grrr...

(there *is* more diversity in the little people collection in our house...need to work on the babies maybe. I just have a 'thing' about the ones that look like they've got the chemically straight hair....)
I remember being sad as a kid because all of the "pretty" dolls had curly blond hair and my hair was very brown and straight. I'm just glad that you can get dolls with brown hair now.

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Old 06-09-2010, 01:33 PM
 
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When my son had strep throat (lab confirmed strep, 104 fever, had been laying on the couch whimpering for days) my MIL said "blow the hair drier down his throat. It will kill the germs by over heating them. Then you don't have to go to the dr."

WTF???

My kids are late teethers, I've had some comments about how they can't eat until they have teeth, so what in the world do I feed them?

This one still really angers me...my middle son is special needs, and for a variety of reasons he uses sign language to communicate. My MIL (who does not live near us, so we see a few times a year) saw me signing with him, we finished our conversation and he wandered off to play. She said "wow, so it's like you're actually talking to each other?!" No, we ARE talking to each other, it's not "like" we're talking to each other. It's a flipping language, it's HIS language! If you could be bothered to learn it you'd know.

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Old 06-09-2010, 02:36 PM
 
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Wow, just read through this whole thing...unbelievable!

The one I got most recently was from MIL. We had planned to keep the "homebirth" aspect of this baby's entrance a secret until after she was born because DH nor I wanted to deal with the commentary that we KNEW would go along with it. But ...she ended up asking me straight out where the baby was going to be born, and I wasn't going to lie to her, so I told her at home. Her eyes got really big and she asked if I was joking, and then realized I wasn't. So I quickly reassured her that we would have a CNM, just like we did at the birth center for both the boys, and that she would have ALL the same equipment that they had at the birth center, and the ONLY difference would be that SHE would drive to ME when labor started, instead of me driving somewhere.

Her response?

"But...what if she's BREACH?!"

Cuz, you know, you can't figure something like that out ahead of time...

Vallere: Blessed Wife, Doula, Homeschool Mom to Ian Gray(11/20/05), Zollie Isaac(10/14/07), Anna Zophia (8/14/09):, and a GIRL coming June 2010!
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Old 06-09-2010, 02:52 PM
 
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"Why does she (my white dd) have a black baby doll?"

Me: "Because babies come in all colors...."
I've answered that same question with a matter-of-fact, "Because her husband is Black."

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Old 06-10-2010, 03:41 AM
 
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I'm not a nurse, but I thought that colds are spread through germs?
That's a dirty, dirty lie... everyone KNOWS it's called a "cold" cuz that's the temperature you are at when you get it...

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I am getting really really tired of all the gender propoganda being thrown at us. My parents love to buy my DD purses and baby dolls (she's 16mo) and then they get angry when DS wants to carry a purse around. DS is very interested in girly things right now. I took him to look at shoes the other day and he LOVED some gold and sparkly flip flops. The sales lady came over and said "You know, we do HAVE boy shoes." I said "I know, he likes the sparkly ones. Thank you!" And she walked away in a huff.
I know, right? It's like with all the violence going on, we shouldn't cultivate nurturing in ALL our children, regardless of their sex/gender.

Fortunately, I've managed to convinced both my parents of the wrongness of DS not having dolls... he now has two baby dolls.

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When my son had strep throat (lab confirmed strep, 104 fever, had been laying on the couch whimpering for days) my MIL said "blow the hair drier down his throat. It will kill the germs by over heating them. Then you don't have to go to the dr."

My kids are late teethers, I've had some comments about how they can't eat until they have teeth, so what in the world do I feed them?

This one still really angers me...my middle son is special needs, and for a variety of reasons he uses sign language to communicate. My MIL (who does not live near us, so we see a few times a year) saw me signing with him, we finished our conversation and he wandered off to play. She said "wow, so it's like you're actually talking to each other?!" No, we ARE talking to each other, it's not "like" we're talking to each other. It's a flipping language, it's HIS language! If you could be bothered to learn it you'd know.
I'm so glad people without medical degrees (and who apparently don't think things through before they open their mouths) are giving advice on treating illnesses...

I think you feed them mama-milk and, um, FOOD...

You mean, if people communicate in a way that I don't understand, they are still intelligent people? No way!!

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Old 06-10-2010, 10:19 AM
 
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Just had a new one. 82 degrees outside and the "put a hat on that baby" has started. I politely explained to the person that doctors now recommend not keeping a baby too hot. She explained..."you don't put a hat on her for warmth, it's because if wind gets in her ears she will get an ear infection."

And here I thought ear infections were caused by fluid and bacteria.
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Old 06-10-2010, 10:24 AM
 
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Just had a new one. 82 degrees outside and the "put a hat on that baby" has started. I politely explained to the person that doctors now recommend not keeping a baby too hot. She explained..."you don't put a hat on her for warmth, it's because if wind gets in her ears she will get an ear infection."

And here I thought ear infections were caused by fluid and bacteria.
eh, just take the advice of a PP's mother and blow her ears out with a blow dryer!

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Old 06-10-2010, 10:51 AM
 
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eh, just take the advice of a PP's mother and blow her ears out with a blow dryer!
Hahahahaha!

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Old 06-10-2010, 12:26 PM
 
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Just had a new one. 82 degrees outside and the "put a hat on that baby" has started. I politely explained to the person that doctors now recommend not keeping a baby too hot. She explained..."you don't put a hat on her for warmth, it's because if wind gets in her ears she will get an ear infection."

And here I thought ear infections were caused by fluid and bacteria.
LOL it seems to me their response should've been b/c of the sun! ...as in sunhat! i love the answer they did give you! though i will say if they already have an ear infection, the wind could cause some pain. it does for me! or if they have tubes in their ears or ears prone to getting infections or soreness, (excessive) wind can cause some pain. but otherwise, CAUSE an infection?????

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Old 06-10-2010, 05:05 PM
 
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I showed this picture of my son to a new woman at our temple - after repeatedly saying that I had a son. She says "OMG, your daughter is just lovely! Look at her hair!" Ooooohkay. Some people just don't pay attention, I think.
she thought that picture was of a girl????? he doesn't look girlish at all.

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Old 06-10-2010, 05:08 PM
 
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LOL. Adorable picture, though.

this is what my son was wearing that day at the library.
are these people nuts? he doesn't look girly either. LOL. i think the librarian and the lady at temple need new glasses...

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Old 06-11-2010, 10:24 AM
 
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: nope, those weren't "unspoiled" children either.

Here, let me find a picture of an "unspoiled" child for you...
here we are.
Where'd you find a picture of my "unspoiled" baby?! LOL
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Old 06-11-2010, 10:30 AM
 
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DD and I go to a local 99 cent store about three times a week. I always have a brief conversation with the same male cashier about the weather or some other basic topic. The day before yesterday he asks me if DD is a boy or girl. I guess the pigtails and the fact that she had on so much pink she could have been a Pepto Bismol bottle didn't matter. And that we are in that store frequently. I told him a girl and his response? "She looks like a boy!" I asked him what a boy looks like and he shrugged his shoulders. I am going to assume he doesn't see very well.Even when DD is not in a pastel color she looks like a girl to me!
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Old 06-12-2010, 05:13 AM
 
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The other day DS and I were at Baby Depot. I got up to the register to check out and DS was sitting in the cart, and I had a whole cart full of baby stuff. The cashier looked at me, and asked "Do you have kids?"

One of DP's co-workers has a son she brings into work. One time she was putting her DS into his bucket seat, and DP noticed the chest clip was shoved down as low as possible. He asked her if she knew the chest clip was supposed to be at chest level. She said she knew, but her DS has always been just fine with it like that. They also apparently bought the bucket seat used, and have never used a base with it, because it didn't come with one.

One of my co-workers bought a used car, that was well over 10 years old and came with a built in carseat. She kept telling me how great it was that the carseat was built into the car, and now she wouldn't have to worry about constantly moving and installing her grandson's carseat. I pointed out that the built in carseat was over 10 years old, and how safety standards have changed and it was unsafe to use, but she refused to listen.

The gender comments get old fast. Even when DS was dressed in head to toe blue people would still ask if he was a boy or a girl. I actually had one person tell me he was too pretty to be a boy and that it was a shame his big blue eyes and long eyelashes were wasted on a boy.
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Old 06-12-2010, 08:58 AM
 
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He asked her if she knew the chest clip was supposed to be at chest level. She said she knew, but her DS has always been just fine with it like that.
*wince*

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it was a shame his big blue eyes and long eyelashes were wasted on a boy.
Have a feeling that his future girlfriends won't think that.

My husband has enormous brown eyes with long eyelashes, and they are not a bit wasted.

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Old 06-12-2010, 01:24 PM
 
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In class the other day, we were working on individual projects. My teacher came up to the person next to me and said, "Hey, I know your son is about the same age as mine. Can I ask you something? Is he BAD?" (emphasis hers) The girl nodded emphatically and said, "Oh yes!" and they started talking about how defiant their kids are and what to do about it. Their kids are 18 months old. They're BABIES. They're not BAD.

To be fair, they did talk about using brief time-outs and natural consequences, but I was still sitting there cringing about the terminology used. I hate it when people refer to children as bad. Just because we don't like what they did doesn't make the person themselves bad!

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Old 06-12-2010, 04:46 PM
 
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I was at a playground w/ a good friend recently our dd's, both 21 months were hanging out and playing. We were chatting and her 6 month old dd was in her car seat watching everything.

The woman sitting next to us said many many dumb things in the 15 min we were there before she left. This was my favorite.

Several of the older kids, including this woman's daughter and an older toddler boy (maybe 3 or 4 years old) had come over and were playing with my friend's 6 month old. This was fine with my friend and the baby was happy. The woman's daughter said, "Look mama we're playing with baby!" the woman's brilliant response. . .

"Oh, he dosen't want to play with the baby! He's a BOY!"

I guess that despite the fact that this little boy was in fact playing with a baby and smiling and laughing, that boys never never like babies.
I have a friend with six children. As SOON as I get both of my kids out of the car, her 12-year-old son comes and kidnaps my one-year-old. I don't have to do anything but change him for 90% of the time we're at their house!!

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Old 06-12-2010, 05:13 PM
 
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In class the other day, we were working on individual projects. My teacher came up to the person next to me and said, "Hey, I know your son is about the same age as mine. Can I ask you something? Is he BAD?" (emphasis hers) The girl nodded emphatically and said, "Oh yes!" and they started talking about how defiant their kids are and what to do about it. Their kids are 18 months old. They're BABIES. They're not BAD.

To be fair, they did talk about using brief time-outs and natural consequences, but I was still sitting there cringing about the terminology used. I hate it when people refer to children as bad. Just because we don't like what they did doesn't make the person themselves bad!
When DS was just a few months old we went to a party with my mom & everyone was asking me, "Is he a good baby?" and I always smiled & said yes. My mom whipped around & said, "Don't say that!! He's not a good baby at all! Tell them what he's really like!" To be fair, he was (is) very very high needs but to say he's not "good", that he's "bad" when he's only a few months old?

Co-sleeping is really wonderful when your child actually SLEEPS!! familybed1.gif
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Old 06-12-2010, 05:21 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Stephenie View Post
Oh my goodness I think we have the same MIL.
My MIL will get out some stickers and a notebook and make my ds put one sticker per page. "No no, we can't put two stickers on the same page..." Or the last time we were there she wanted him to "finish" a page in the coloring book. "I won't put it on the fridge unless you finish it." As if he cared. He just flipped to the next page, scribbled a bit and the same fight started over. I always want to scream "Quit micromanaging my toddler!" at her. Thankfully we now live 2500 miles away. haha.
That sounds like my aunt. She and my uncle don't have any children (thank goodness). We were at my grandmothers house and my ODS was eating chocolate pudding, some of which got on the tablecloth. She FREAKED out, even though my gma didn't care at all-every time his fingers got near the table she would go "look out! he's going to get it on the table!!"

Sarah-Wife to Kelly, mostly organic crafty SAHMama to my angel, Canaan (11/01/07-03/15/2013) and Ezra (05-12-09).

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