What is the worst/dumbest thing anyone has ever said to you about parenting stuff? V - Page 25 - Mothering Forums

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#721 of 1072 Old 04-21-2011, 05:14 PM
 
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My DD was breech the last 3 months of my pregnancy.   When my mom and a friend were visiting the first week after she was born, my mom said to her friend, "See how strong her feet are?  That's from treading water in the womb for so long."  She was quite serious.

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#722 of 1072 Old 04-21-2011, 08:50 PM
 
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My DD (almost 4 at the time) was having a meltdown in a grocery store that we used to go to all the time. She has autism, and grocery stores are not her favorite places ever, but the store workers were used to her meltdowns and were awesome with helping me when I needed it regarding checking out or letting us have a moment or two when she lost her cool. 

 

This woman in line behind us asked if there was anything she could do to help.

 

Me: If you could just take a few steps back, she prefers to have her space.

Woman: What's wrong with her? (backing up)

Me: Thanks. She's just upset because she's a bit overstimulated. She'll be okay in a few minutes. 

Woman: Does she have that assburgers thing? (Really people, how hard is it to say Aspergers?)

Me: No, Alena has autism. It's a more severe form of Aspergers. (Note: I am not only trying to calm my kiddo down, but also trying to check out, so this woman is already getting on my nerves here.)

Woman: Oh, I'm so sorry. Don't you wish she just had cancer or something? At least cancer kids die.

 

I am not even kidding that my jaw hit the floor. I think I actually stood up from my daughter, which is just about the worst thing I could do for her. The clerk at the till and the people behind her all reacted about the same way. I swear you could hear a pin drop.

 

The woman never recanted or reacted in anyway. She honestly feels like this... I don't even remember what I said, but the cashier who knew my daughter and I really well checked us out super fast, and the last I saw of this woman, she was having a conversation with a very angry store manager.


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#723 of 1072 Old 04-21-2011, 10:06 PM
 
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OMG.

I don't know how I would even respond if I heard someone say such a thing.

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#724 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 12:29 AM
 
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Some older family member said something similar once, i don't remember who because I was really little the what she said stuck with me... But, My cousin has some sort of mental disorder- not sure what- but he is in some sort of institute and has been for as long as I can remember, at least since he was 6 or 7, and I remember one of them saying, "why couldn't he just be born with a physical handicap, then maybe no one would be having to pay for his care for the rest of his life" Like it was his fault, you know, he decided on day one that hey, i think I'd rather be handicapped for the rest of my life. Whatever he has, he basically has the mind of a 2 year old.

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#725 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 04:10 AM
 
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You're supposed to cut up grapes? I guess I should know that...DS just bites them in half.

 

 



lol.gif  My soon to be teenager still asks me to cut her grapes in half!  She says they taste better that way. 

 


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#726 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 06:14 AM
 
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Some older family member said something similar once, i don't remember who because I was really little the what she said stuck with me... But, My cousin has some sort of mental disorder- not sure what- but he is in some sort of institute and has been for as long as I can remember, at least since he was 6 or 7, and I remember one of them saying, "why couldn't he just be born with a physical handicap, then maybe no one would be having to pay for his care for the rest of his life" Like it was his fault, you know, he decided on day one that hey, i think I'd rather be handicapped for the rest of my life. Whatever he has, he basically has the mind of a 2 year old.



Well, yeah! Don't you know how awesome it is to be disabled and unable to care for yourself??

 

Seriously, some people are super ignorant...


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#727 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 10:00 AM
 
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Woman: Oh, I'm so sorry. Don't you wish she just had cancer or something? At least cancer kids die.

jaw2.gifThat by far takes the cake.  As if you would rather bury your DD than deal with a meltdown in a grocery store.  My god.
 

 


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#728 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 12:52 PM
 
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Originally Posted by JynxGirl View Post
 

Woman: Does she have that assburgers thing? (Really people, how hard is it to say Aspergers?)


That woman was atrocious, and I'm so sorry she said such a hurtful thing to you. Regarding the above, though, I've seen people say this before on MDC, so I've been paying close attention to the way parents of children with Aspergers say the word, and I cannot tell a difference between the two. Are you supposed to make the /p/ really pronounced, or change the vowel sound of the /a/ or something? redface.gif


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#729 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 01:03 PM
 
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I told my mom that we'd had an ultrasound and the tech told us baby was one of the most active babies she'd ever seen. My mom's response was a cheery "Ritalin!" As if there aren't enough things wrong with this, let's note that my mom had me diagnosed and medicated for psychiatric illnesses as a child and has persisted to blame all of our family problems on me, instead of on several generations of dysfunction. Sorry, Mom, I'm not putting my kid on Ritalin just because she doesn't understand my irrational demands. 

 

 

 

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#730 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 03:13 PM
 
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I never knew it until I was cutting them for my dd, but they actually DO taste better that way!

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#731 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 03:14 PM
 
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Grapes, cut, that is. Quote didn't work.

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#732 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 06:20 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JynxGirl View Post
the last I saw of this woman, she was having a conversation with a very angry store manager.

That grocery store ROCKS! Do you know how rare it is for a store manager to tell off a customer?

 

 

(Also, as I have a 12 year old friend with cancer, I probably would've gotten myself arrested if I'd been on of the other customers watching that.)

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#733 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 06:28 PM
 
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OT - The person with the "CLEAN ALL THE THINGS!" avatar; it has always made me smile and conjure up a soft belly laugh.

 

Now someone on this thread posted about it and I don't have the time to go find your screen names but, God bless you. I just laughed like I have never laughed before and I feel light again. You are awesometimesforeverland.

 

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#734 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 08:23 PM
 
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   The worst thing someone has ever said to me about parenting .. is that I dont raise my children white.(My children are half Puerto Rican and have white). This person thinks that I should not raise them with any of thier Puerto Rican Hertiage in their lives.. Thats very dumb to me.

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#735 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 08:48 PM
 
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twins.gif            tiphat.gif

 

Glad to share, yummus!

 

 

And Welcome.gif

to uticagirl- I just noticed this is your first post!

That IS baffling- why would anyone want to deny anyone their own heritage? headscratch.gif


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#736 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 08:59 PM
 
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oops, meant to share the link- I hadn't realized how many clicks it takes to get to the link under my pic:

 

heartbeat.gif     http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/06/this-is-why-ill-never-be-adult.html    heartbeat.gif

 

 

 

...I'm still bowled over by the "cancer kids" comment... reading that was like a punch in the stomach guilty.gif


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#737 of 1072 Old 04-22-2011, 09:19 PM
 
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My aunt said, "What do you do for intellectual stimulation?" (regarding my job as "Stay at Home Mom")


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#738 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 04:59 AM
 
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[quote name="

Woman: Oh, I'm so sorry. Don't you wish she just had cancer or something? At least cancer kids die.

 

I am not even kidding that my jaw hit the floor. I think I actually stood up from my daughter, which is just about the worst thing I could do for her. The clerk at the till and the people behind her all reacted about the same way. I swear you could hear a pin drop.

 

The woman never recanted or reacted in anyway. She honestly feels like this... I don't even remember what I said, but the cashier who knew my daughter and I really well checked us out super fast, and the last I saw of this woman, she was having a conversation with a very angry store manager.

[/quote]

I'm so sorry that happened. I can't believe anyone would actually say that. I don't think I would have been able to maintain my composure.

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#739 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 07:56 AM
 
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yeah, I have to say if someone told me 'don't you wish she had cancer?  at least cancer kids die?'  It would take all the energy I have not to shoot back 'no, but I wish you had cancer so that maybe you'd be dead instead of acting like a total b*tch right now.'  it takes a lot to get me to say something so horrible but I don't mess around with wishing death on innocent children.

 

pretty sure it would take everything I have to not say that as a customer watching.  I just can't even fathom.

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#740 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 08:27 AM
 
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I don't think she was being rude to you. I said the same thing to my husband about MY DD. That it'll be child abuse to use a hyphenated last name for DD; husband's last name is long enough. I was part joking of course, but his name already doesn't fit on forms. I have a middle name and the government cut the last 2 letters out because it wouldn't fit in their computer!!! She wasn't berating you for anything, nor telling you that you're ruining the baby's life. 
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by MissMaegie'sMama View Post

I always see this thread in the ranks, but I've never had a good enough story to post here. Until now. winky.gif

 

I have a hyphenated last name (my birth surname & my DH's surname). A couple weeks ago, I went to the polls to vote, and the elderly lady who volunteers at the polling place in my ward was trying to find my name among those of the other registered voters on her list. I jokingly told her, "Just look for the longest last name on the page." She found it and said, "That IS a long name. I hope you don't give your kids that name. You have to think of the little ones, you know." I couldn't believe it... she was giving me some rather meddlesome and rude advice on what I ought to not name my kids! I mean really- whether or not my kids have my name, my DH's name, or some combo of the two is NONE OF YOUR DANG BUSINESS, lady. eyesroll.gif



 


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#741 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 08:33 AM
 
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!!!!!!!!!! I've read several pages on this thread and this one takes the...not cake, that's too nice a word...flake??? Oh my! Did she expect that a mother would wish ill for her baby????

 

During pregnancy with DD, I went for the triple marker test and such, thinking, if something is out of usual, I'd like to be prepared. Good thing the probabilities came out much lower than would be expected for my age, because I'd just have worried. Next time, no such tests, thanks! I don't even think that I'll go for the NST at 12 w. 20 w is good. Doppler heart rate the rest of the time.
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by dairy2dogs View Post

[quote name="

Woman: Oh, I'm so sorry. Don't you wish she just had cancer or something? At least cancer kids die.

 

I am not even kidding that my jaw hit the floor. I think I actually stood up from my daughter, which is just about the worst thing I could do for her. The clerk at the till and the people behind her all reacted about the same way. I swear you could hear a pin drop.

 

The woman never recanted or reacted in anyway. She honestly feels like this... I don't even remember what I said, but the cashier who knew my daughter and I really well checked us out super fast, and the last I saw of this woman, she was having a conversation with a very angry store manager.

[/quote]

I'm so sorry that happened. I can't believe anyone would actually say that. I don't think I would have been able to maintain my composure.


 


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#742 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 09:04 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Litcrit View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jackies Ladybug View Post
my daughter still doesnt have teeth yet at 13 months, MIL is VERY concerned that there is definitely something wrong with her. never mind that i didnt get teeth until 15 months, the same time my mom and grandma popped their first teeth. i guess nothing about my child could possibly resemble anything from MY side of the family!
When dh's cousin was a year old and still had no teeth, a nice ped asked the parents 'Have you ever seen a person who never grew any teeth?'

This calmed them.


In terms of BF, give me a baby with no teeth at 12mos., over my step-son, who was BORN with a few!  Yikes!!

 


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#743 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 09:09 AM
 
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My Mom implored me not to make or buy any dress-up clothes for my twin sons, when they were little.  Evidently, playing dress-up (even with the likes of cowboy boots and medical scrubs) might "make them gay".  Now, one of the twins did love those sparkly red shoes Target sells, that look like something out of the Wizard of Oz.  But who wouldn't?  I figured he'd probably grow out of that love, sometime before he went to high school.  Or, if not, I clearly did not CREATE his interest in wearing such shoes, by buying them!  Sheesh!


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#744 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 10:48 AM
 
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My friend asked me the other day when I planned on weaning kiddo.  I said that we were doing child led weaning so whenever she was ready to be done she'd be done.  She said well just promise me you won't go past 6 years old!


Her reasoning was because she used to nanny for a boy a bit older than 6 who still nursed and whenever he misbehaved, he'd just run to his mom (she nannied while mom was working in a home office) and ask to nurse so he could get away with it and she'd always let him get away with it.  I really don't get how she thinks it is the nursing older than six that made him think he could get away with doing whatever he wanted, rather than a mom who would excuse any behavior.

 

I was offended, both by her thinking I should promise HER which age to wean at as if she has any real say and by her apparently thinking my nursing still means I also let my kid get away with anything... which is silly because she has seen my child disciplined before and my child doesn't even nurse except to sleep anymore.  Pretty sure nursing doesn't equal 'can do anything kid wants so long as they nurse right after they do it.'  that is a parenting problem, not a nursing problem.

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#745 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 11:17 AM
 
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My daughter was complaining to her grandpa (my Dad) the other day that she wouldn't get to feed her little sister once she was born, and that she had to wait until I went back to work before she could give her a bottle (I'm going to try to EBF while out of work for 12 weeks, and pump and store for when I go back to work).  My Dad told her "Oh I'm sure your Mommy will let you give her a bottle before then!"  She told him - "Nuh-uh! Madeline will get milk from Mommy's boobies and I don't make milk because I'm not a Mommy. So I have to wait until Mommy goes back to work and she has bottles."

 

I thought my Dad was going to pass out or go into a rage... He turned to me all red-faced and asked if I really thought that was appropriate to talk about or do in front of my daughter.  I asked him why in the world would it not be!?!?!?!? He said "well, you do whatever hippie thing you want, but it's healthier for the baby to have formula! You are going to make my granddaughter sickly!"  I informed him that it was healthiest for the baby to have breastmilk (and of course he flinched when I said the word "breast"). And he asked where I got some ridiculous idea like that from, why would they manufacture formula in the first place.  I replied with "Well, that ridiculous idea comes from every medical organization I can think of and every doctor, no matter how much of a flake, I have ever talked to agrees. And just because it's manufactured doesn't mean it's healthiest. People manufacture cigarettes, donuts, and cheeseburgers too."  He just stared at me and said "Just as long as you go in another room to do it when I'm around and you don't do it in public - you'll get d*** arrested and be out of a job!"

 

Now the kicker to this is - my Dad used to be a police officer where we live. Myself and DH *BOTH* are police officers. Our state actually has a law protecting breast feeding in public.  And we know this. And he SHOULD know this. I'm glad times are changing, but we still have so much further to go!!!

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#746 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 11:28 AM
 
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yes, heaven forbid a little girl knows that someday she'll have breasts which are intended to produce milk to feed a baby with.  We totally should be keeping that information from our children... along with not telling them that everyone poops... oh wait...

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#747 of 1072 Old 04-23-2011, 02:47 PM
 
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yes, heaven forbid a little girl knows that someday she'll have breasts which are intended to produce milk to feed a baby with.  We totally should be keeping that information from our children... along with not telling them that everyone poops... oh wait...



LOL! Exactly! Besides, DS was bottle-fed (so never really exposed to BFing, no pun intended) and yet is asking me WHY he has nipples. Why? What are they for? What do they do?? So yeah, it's terrible for a kid to know how babies get fed -- imagine how many more questions he'd have if he'd known the truth from the start!

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#748 of 1072 Old 04-24-2011, 05:55 AM
 
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1. I was weak after childbirth. (And not for just a few hours, but for weeks!)

2. If I ate certain fruits, yogurt, or anything cold, my baby would catch a cold. 

3. If I showered too much in the first month, my baby would get sick and I may have trouble getting pregnant again.

4. If I ate beans, peas, certain veggies, or nuts my baby would get gas.

5. If I didn't drink cow milk, I wouldn't make enough milk for my baby.

6. I was holding my baby wrong.

7. I was holding my baby too much.

8. My 2 week old baby was getting spoiled. 

9. All babies cry to have their diaper changed. 

10. I'm inexperienced and don't know what I'm doing.

 


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#749 of 1072 Old 04-24-2011, 07:32 AM
 
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9. All babies cry to have their diaper changed. 

 



hmmmm..... so EC babies don't cry? Cool!

 

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#750 of 1072 Old 04-24-2011, 11:16 AM
 
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Father (while I'm nursing DS) : So how old do you plan to keep feeding him til?

redface.gif

I really should have said 'Til he is 20 or can buy his own food.'

redface.gif

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