Feeling Very Overwhelmed Today - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-24-2010, 01:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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DD (11 Mo) and I have both been fighting a minor cold, so that may add to it, but I'm having one of those "I want to run away and braid hair on the beach for a living" kind of days. I'm a first time mom and there are some days that I feel like a tidal wave is about to crash on my head. DD is lovely and fantastic and obviously the best child ever born, but she is also extremely high needs and extremely attached to mama. I am with her 24x7 every.single.day. When my hubby is in charge, he just brings here wherever I am because "she misses me so much". This means I am *never* alone. I eat with company, talk on the phone with company, read, write and pray with company, poop with company - there is a reason there is no adult loving going on in this house - we would probably do that with company, too. I desperately need a break.

I've asked my husband repeatedly to take the baby, but he firmly believes that the baby needs access to my boobs or the world will fall apart. I don't know what else to do - we are living in a new state, so I have no friends or family to help. I've tried leaving her in daycare at church, but she freaked out, so I ended up staying in daycare with her (Hence the cold. Literally all 8 kids in there had runny noses. That's another rant for another day).

I've decided that when hubby gets done playing Call of Duty (must be nice to have that kind of free time! Sorry, bitterness is coming out) that I am laying down the law. Every evening from today on, Daddy will be in charge for the 1 hour between bath time and bed time. I will be taking my gelatinous rear end down to the gym to work out, and if the baby freaks out, her father will have to comfort her.

Sorry for my brain dump, but I needed to get it out.
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Old 01-24-2010, 01:41 AM
 
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For a very long time, I had this issue with dh. He wouldn't bring me ds, but if ds started crying, he wouldn't necessarily do enough to try and calm him down or comfort him. I work from home, so I'm home all the time. At some point, I just went on meetup.com, joined a bookclub and told dh that I would be going to those meetings. He coped just fine, and they both survived. I got to go meet with interesting adults and enjoy intelligent conversation. So, I agree with getting out of the house.
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Old 01-24-2010, 05:56 AM
 
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You definitely need your own time!! Do you pump? Then DH wouldn't have the "baby needs your boobs" excuse.

He may also be feeling insecure about his ability to calm or entertain your DD. Just leave them and they'll figure it out. Good luck!

Stacy mom to Isa 5/07 and Maya 5/09 DP to Rebeca
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