Should we keep going with this or make a change? (gymnastics--long) - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 40 Old 05-02-2010, 01:12 AM
 
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Oh, that's so sad! I feel bad for her. I bet it hurts her feelings.

My daughter tried gymnastics, but had a hard time waiting her turn, and it stopped being fun.

She was also in dance class, which seemed easier on her. So, I put her in a tumbling class in her dance studio. SHE LOVED IT. It was all she thought about, all she wanted to do. I even got a phone call from the principal of her school when she was in kindergarten saying that whenever she is supposed to be WALKING down the halls that she does cartwheels instead. All the time.

The tumbling obsession lasted til fifth grade when it was taken over by a tap dancing obession.

We also moved from one dance studio where she couldn't make friends, to another one where she made lots of friends. It wasn't the studio... it was just that particular group of kids. She made friends at the second studio, and she's kept them for 12 years. Every August, when it was time to sign up for classes, they would get together to make sure they were always in the same class.

Sometimes, it isn't the school, or your child. You might need to keep trying new places til she finds her niche. Everybody has one.. you just need to find it.
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#32 of 40 Old 05-02-2010, 10:36 AM
 
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Swimming relaxes me too! I LOVE swimming!

Definitely get her on a team - there really is tons and tons of swimming happening during a team practice (with laps you just wait until the person in front of you is far enough ahead that you won't run into them, and the order is usually based on people's speed). It's a great sport, and really really fun!!
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#33 of 40 Old 05-03-2010, 12:34 PM
 
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There is another aspect to swimming that might appeal to your daughter. I was talking to a lady whose daughter started doing competitive gymnastics at a very young age, and when she turned 14 years old, decided to stop because she didn't want to move into the ultra competitive sphere. (Not sure what the proper term is.) She still wanted to be active, so she decided to go out for a high school sport. She chose diving. Boy did the swim/diving team just eat her up. All of her natural aptitude and years of disciplined training just clicked right in because the skills are complimentary. It is apparently very unusual to have a freshman in varsity diving, but she did fantastic. Maybe your daughter might eventually like to do diving.
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#34 of 40 Old 05-03-2010, 01:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for all of the responses re: swimming. Usually dh takes her to weekly lessons, but yesterday, I did. I was absolutely at how different she is in that class than in gymnastics. I told my husband, and he said it's that way all the time. She was calm...CALM. Patient--there are always 2 or 3 other kids in the class, so there is an element of waiting. She looked agreeable, and she looked so HAPPY. That's what got me the most. I mean she was all smiles. She took instruction from the teacher, and looked proud of her acheivements. She was liek a totally different kid. Only when I watched that class did I realize that she hardly ever smiled in gymnastics--it makes me sad to think about. So I'm pretty sure we made the right decision by pulling her out. If after a while, she misses artistic, I can try it out at the new gym.


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There is another aspect to swimming that might appeal to your daughter. I was talking to a lady whose daughter started doing competitive gymnastics at a very young age, and when she turned 14 years old, decided to stop because she didn't want to move into the ultra competitive sphere. (Not sure what the proper term is.) She still wanted to be active, so she decided to go out for a high school sport. She chose diving. Boy did the swim/diving team just eat her up. All of her natural aptitude and years of disciplined training just clicked right in because the skills are complimentary. It is apparently very unusual to have a freshman in varsity diving, but she did fantastic. Maybe your daughter might eventually like to do diving.
You know, she can't do any kind of diving team or lessons until 6, so that will be late next summer. But we've always felt she'd love diving and excel at it. She's the only kid in her gymnastics class who will go across the monkey bars 12 feet up then do a forward tumble into the pit . She's been doing that since she was 3, and also flips on the trampoline. We will definitely keep diving in mind for her as she gets older!
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#35 of 40 Old 05-03-2010, 05:10 PM
 
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You know, she can't do any kind of diving team or lessons until 6, so that will be late next summer. But we've always felt she'd love diving and excel at it. She's the only kid in her gymnastics class who will go across the monkey bars 12 feet up then do a forward tumble into the pit . She's been doing that since she was 3, and also flips on the trampoline. We will definitely keep diving in mind for her as she gets older!
I know this is controversial, but can't she just swim? I mean the idea of "no diving team until she's 6" is a bit unnerving to me, and I'm pretty flexible on kids being involved in activities. It seems that gymnastics got away from you until you were spending hours driving and having her unhappy in class, but no one noticed because she was "advanced."

Now you've realized that, and I think it's wonderful all around. I just don't see the need to jump into a diving or swimming team. She can just swim in the pool & have fun. I'm afraid you'd head right back into the same path where you really don't know if she likes it because swim team just becomes your life.

Really, does she have to decide at 4 or 5 what she wants her "thing" to be? As I said, my intention isn't to be harsh. My children are in organized activities as I was from an early age. I don't mind the concept, but I think it can become too much.

It's us: DH , DS ; DD ; and me . Also there's the . And the 3 . I . Oh, and .
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#36 of 40 Old 05-03-2010, 08:00 PM
 
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I know this is controversial, but can't she just swim? ...
Really, does she have to decide at 4 or 5 what she wants her "thing" to be? As I said, my intention isn't to be harsh. My children are in organized activities as I was from an early age. I don't mind the concept, but I think it can become too much.
I totally get where you are coming from and sort of agree with you, but....


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DD has strabismus which means that she sees and moves through the world differently than most kids. I also suspect that if evaluated, she might be considered ADHD. She jumps around a lot and has trouble not invading the other girls' personal space. She gets too close to them, has trouble keeping her place in line, sometimes cuts, etc.

I really think that swimming could be theraputic for her. It is fantasic for getting the hang of where you are in space and intense swimming is oddly relaxing (like a runners high).

Really high energy kids are often best behaved when they get LOTS of activity. If she were my child, I'd really push to get her on a summer swim team this year. She'd most likely practice 45 min. a day, 4 days a week, and have some swim meets where she'd spend most of her time hanging out with her new friends eating snacks from the snack bar (my kids LOVED meets). She'd most likely have a blast. The usual requirement is to be able to swim the length of the pool 1 time in one of the four competitive strokes. Check out your city parks and rec programs.

And summer swimming is nice because it has an end date. It's not like gynmastics that just keeps going and going and going.

but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif

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#37 of 40 Old 05-03-2010, 10:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I know this is controversial, but can't she just swim? I mean the idea of "no diving team until she's 6" is a bit unnerving to me, and I'm pretty flexible on kids being involved in activities. It seems that gymnastics got away from you until you were spending hours driving and having her unhappy in class, but no one noticed because she was "advanced."

Now you've realized that, and I think it's wonderful all around. I just don't see the need to jump into a diving or swimming team. She can just swim in the pool & have fun. I'm afraid you'd head right back into the same path where you really don't know if she likes it because swim team just becomes your life.

Really, does she have to decide at 4 or 5 what she wants her "thing" to be? As I said, my intention isn't to be harsh. My children are in organized activities as I was from an early age. I don't mind the concept, but I think it can become too much.
I understand what you're saying, but your assessment of our situation is not quite right.....gymnastics never really "got away from us." DD is a kid with a lot of heart. She is not the kind of kid to come home and cry because she doesn't like something; she's not a complainer (not that there's anything wrong at all with kids crying, just that I had to pull, I mean pull it out of her that things weren't quite right in gymnastics). She almost seems oblivious sometimes, just going about what she thinks it is she is supposed to be doing. I've had my eye on this the whole time, and dh and I have had many discussions about it. It's not like I just cluelessly kept my child in a bad situation, content that she was "advanced." Some children are just harder to read--even for their own parents.

Why is it "unnerving" that I would consider diving/ swimming team or lessons for my daughter? She is a very active child who is not in preschool. Our aim is to give her a physical outlet and get her around other kids so that she can make some friends. I have found that, where I live, that is best done in organized activities done consistently. We have a pool at home and she has plenty of opportunity to "just swim"!

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I really think that swimming could be theraputic for her. It is fantasic for getting the hang of where you are in space and intense swimming is oddly relaxing (like a runners high).

Really high energy kids are often best behaved when they get LOTS of activity. If she were my child, I'd really push to get her on a summer swim team this year. She'd most likely practice 45 min. a day, 4 days a week, and have some swim meets where she'd spend most of her time hanging out with her new friends eating snacks from the snack bar (my kids LOVED meets). She'd most likely have a blast. The usual requirement is to be able to swim the length of the pool 1 time in one of the four competitive strokes. Check out your city parks and rec programs.

And summer swimming is nice because it has an end date. It's not like gynmastics that just keeps going and going and going.
Yes. Where we live, a summer swim "team" is the best bet to get her swimming regularly. I don't even think a lot of the teams are competitive. And I do think swimming is very relaxing to her. I've had several therapists comment on dd's "anxiety," "rigidity," or "needing to relax." If there is a sport/ activity that helps to release some of that for her and get her some social interaction, I'm all for it, as long as she is enjoying herself.
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#38 of 40 Old 05-04-2010, 08:54 AM
 
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Around here, if my kid wants to try anything cool on the diving board he will have to be with a diving coach. Culture shift attempts to remove all danger except obesity and diabetes.

I do wonder what effect it would have had on my kids to not be able to train swimming and gymnastics from an early age. I grew up in the country without opportunity so I was "just" swimming and trying to do tricks in the tall grass. I think the answer is that they would be kids who are pretty much the same but without a lot of cool skills and with less plug-in to the community.

I think it's just a different mindset that probably is based on one's own childhood memories and the experience of our own kids' way of being. Some people would think nothing of 15 hours a week of preschool for a 4-5 year old but think 6 hours a week of gymnastics is too much. I think it depends on the kids. Some little kids will do better in the same amount of time in the gym than being in preschool.
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#39 of 40 Old 05-04-2010, 09:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So we just got back from dd's first co-ed "trampoline and tumbling" class at the gym near our home. Dd says she loved it! She said the kids were "much, much nicer" and she liked having a "boy coach because boy coaches are fun." The coach said she was at times distracted and had to be "brought back," but he also said her behavior was not very different from the other kids her age he coaches. He also said she really seems to want to get it right and do a good job. It is a developmental class (not recreational), so we'll have to keep an eye on it, but since she's young, it would be a long time before she got moved up. Plus, she only has to go once a week for an hour. So hopefully this works. Thanks again for all the insights.

--naismama
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#40 of 40 Old 05-04-2010, 10:03 PM
 
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I'm so glad to hear that it went well!

Trampoline is FUN!

but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif

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