Funny things kids say.... - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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Old 06-20-2010, 08:14 PM
 
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Oh man, these are funny.

Right now dd2 is into saying "Dammit!". A Lot. All the time. For almost everything she gets frustrated with. And for a 2 y.o., that's a lot. E.g., she can't get her remote control car to fit in the trunk of another car she's playing with: "DAMMIT!"

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Old 06-21-2010, 12:16 AM
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Last night I made rainbow chard for dinner. DS says:

Him: Hey mom, what's that?
Me: It's chard. Isn't it pretty?
Him: Uh huh. It's fresh! and green! and tastes SOOOOO GOOOD!

He really did eat a giant pile of it, but I have no idea where he got the rest.

We went on a hike today and DS said

Him: Will we see any animals on our adventure walk?
DH: Maybe some birds or squirrels.
Him: What about lions?
DH: I suppose there might be a mountain lion.
Him: Or a yeti.



My other favorite was driving in the car the other day. He says

Him: Hey mommy, our car is dirty. We should wash it.
Me: It's not that dirty.
Him: It is very dirty INDEED.

Whoa, you're 3! Did you just say INDEED?
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Old 06-21-2010, 01:32 AM
 
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I love these!!

A nifty quote from my daughter (around 4-ish at the time): "Mommy, I can see in the dark, that means I'm nocturnal. They said on Aminal Planet that cats see in the dark because they're nocturnal, and since I'm a Kat, that means I am, too." (The "Aminal" is on purpose, too-- and her first name is actually Katarina, but she gets tired of correcting and insists she is "Just Kat")

Before we found out we were pregnant with DD2, DD1 begged and pleaded with us to let her have a sibling or, at the very least, a puppy-- but she'd rather have a sibling. So we finally feel comfortable letting her know that we're expecting, and I decide to ask her just one more time, "if you could choose, what would you pick: a baby, or a puppy." She threw me for a loop, and said a puppy! Okay, so I let her know that we're going to have a baby, and she says, "oh, okay..........are we still getting a puppy?"

A borrowed one from my friend's 5 year old: Friend's DD had been playing tag with my DD and some other friends, and hit a slippery spot in the grass. Friend's BF says, "heads up, there's a puddle there!" Not totally being a smart-alec, but as a general idea, because the park had all sorts of hidden low spots. Friend's DD turns to him and says, "Thanks, Captain Olivia!"

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Old 06-21-2010, 05:07 AM
 
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My nephew is 7. Long story short, a few days ago my sister and I were explaining transexuality/transgender/gender roles to him. I had explained that sometimes people have surgery if they really wanna change sexes. The next day they're at the doc's office, located in a big medical complex, and he sees the sign saying "outpatient surgery" and asks his mom, "is that where you go to have surgery to become a girl?"

I laughed so hard when my sis told me this. Now she doesn't want me talking about "this stuff" with him. Nevermind that we'd been talking about it and he overheard and started asking questions. Actually, he has a much better understanding of these things than I think a lot of adults do now.
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Old 06-21-2010, 05:37 AM
 
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Ds was about 3 and we were at the park. He was scared of dogs, and there was someone walking his dog at the park. I explained to ds that it was OK because the owner had the dog on a leash and the dog wasn't coming near us.

"What's an owner?" ds asked.
"Someone who takes care of a dog and makes sure it does what it's supposed to do," I replied.
"Are you my owner?" he asked.

And just about a month ago, dh was out of town. I'd had a long, hard week up late grading/getting ready to teach and really needed some sleep. So, on Saturday evening I said to ds (9) (who's an early riser):

"Tomorrow morning, you can do anything you want in the morning (thinking he'd play computer games) as long as it doesn't involve the stove or waking me up before 8 am."
He looked at me with a sly grin and said "Can I drive the car?"
The little imp! I see a future lawyer.

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Old 06-21-2010, 01:07 PM
 
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We're driving down my parents' dirt road, way out in the sticks. Two very large bucks jump in front of us. DS2, 3.75yo, yells OH MY GOD MOM! KANGAROOS!!!!! I guess he thought they were kangaroos because of the way deer bound and jump?

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Old 06-21-2010, 02:26 PM
 
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Originally Posted by LynnS6 View Post


"Are you my owner?" he asked.

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Old 06-21-2010, 05:43 PM
 
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A few days ago, I was getting ready for work, walking around the house in my underwear and DD pipes up, wide-eyed and serious, "Mommy, those panties are waaaaaaaay too small for you, I can see your bum hanging out, they're waaaaaay too small!" Ok, I am pregnant and do have a little junk in the trunk anyway...so I tell my coworker this later on and we laugh about it and when I see DD later that day I say, "I told Jane what you said about my underwear being too small and she thought it was really funny." DD, very seriously replied, "It's not!" I guess I need to get some bigger underwear!

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Old 06-21-2010, 06:57 PM
 
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I have to share this . My DS is 18 months old. We live in Serbia, which was bombed by NATO a decade back. There are still some bombed buildings around the city, which have just been left there, and we pass them in the bus often. Today, there was something of a traffic jam. My little son intensely looked at one of the bombed buildings, started pulling very serious faces, and in the end pointed at the building and said: "Building is hurting".

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Old 06-21-2010, 11:22 PM
 
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Originally Posted by MittensKittens View Post
I have to share this . My DS is 18 months old. We live in Serbia, which was bombed by NATO a decade back. There are still some bombed buildings around the city, which have just been left there, and we pass them in the bus often. Today, there was something of a traffic jam. My little son intensely looked at one of the bombed buildings, started pulling very serious faces, and in the end pointed at the building and said: "Building is hurting".
ooohh...that is just so sweet!!!!
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Old 06-22-2010, 03:14 AM
 
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DD mostly amuses us by being more adult than we expect - she's 26 months and very verbal.

So, the other day we were all in bed, and she was on the far side giving Daddy a kiss on the cheek. I said "Can Mummy have a kiss too?" and DD off-handedly said "No. Can't reach." OK then!

She also asks me to sing "Row row a boat genna downa stream CROTADILE!" - it comes out in a great rush because I only sang her the crocodile version recently, and she panics that I might accidentally sing the regular, boring verse unless she remind me. So one hears, ten times a day in ever-increasing pitch and franticness "Mummy sing a row row a boat gennadownastreamCROTADILE!!........ pease".

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Old 06-22-2010, 05:23 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Surfacing View Post
Oh man, these are funny.

Right now dd2 is into saying "Dammit!". A Lot. All the time. For almost everything she gets frustrated with. And for a 2 y.o., that's a lot. E.g., she can't get her remote control car to fit in the trunk of another car she's playing with: "DAMMIT!"
ROTFL, I still remeber when I learned that word- my father took me canoeing and dropped the canoe on his foot and let it fly. It became my favorite word for some time after, I thought it must be a really cool word if my Dad had said it. My parents took me aside after awhile and had to explain that its not REALLY the kind of word you say ALL THE TIME.


I also remember, when I was in Elementary School- third grade maybe? My parents serve us sauerkraut for dinner. I thought it was disgusting. The next day, some other kids tricked the teacher into eating an Atomic Fireball. Her face contorted up and she said "It tastes like..." And I chimed in- "Sour Crap?!?" The teacher looked at me and asked if I was SURE I was allowed to say that word, to which I replied, "Oh yes, we had some for dinner last night!"
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Old 06-22-2010, 01:21 PM
 
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"It tastes like..." And I chimed in- "Sour Crap?!?" The teacher looked at me and asked if I was SURE I was allowed to say that word, to which I replied, "Oh yes, we had some for dinner last night!"


Another word both kids have heard us say inadvertantly is "Sh!t". I'll never forget the first time I heard dd1 who was not quite 2 y.o. peering at our air purifier, playing with the buttons, and muttering, "Sh!T! Sh!T!" really emphasizing the "T". Oh man, that was funny!

The other day dd2 said it too. I just ignored it but thought it was hilarious.

Aah children.

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Old 06-23-2010, 11:31 PM
 
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My 2 (almost 3) year old has a 2 piece bathing suit and when we get ready to go swimming she will bring me her swim suit top and say:

"WAIT, I need my swim nursers first!"



Here's another one from my lovely Evelyn:

E: "Hey I see me in my baby sister"
Me: "Oh, do you mean she looks like you?"
E: "Ya! She looks just like my butt!"

Upon further investigation I figured out she was trying to tell me that her and her sissy had butts that looked the same... but what she actually said was funnier

-T, Wife and Best Friend to R 3/2005; Mommie to E 8/2007; and G 3/2009

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Old 06-23-2010, 11:59 PM
 
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GOOD moms let their kids lick the beaters. GREAT moms turn off the mixer first!
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