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#1 of 28 Old 09-07-2010, 11:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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True or not? What exceptions, if any, are there? (BTW, DS is 21 mo)
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#2 of 28 Old 09-07-2010, 11:02 PM
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At 21 months I would totally wake my kid, if it was the right time to avoid being up all night. Like I'd encourage her to get up from a nap so that she'd go to be before 10pm. But that also had to do with DH's preferences, and I know at times I'd happily let her sleep and I'd relax and take some me time and rest and get things done-- and then be okay with being up late with her. But at that age she was dropping her nap and it started to be that if she napped and stayed up really late, she'd wake even earlier the next morning, and get even less sleep as each day went on... so it depends!
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#3 of 28 Old 09-07-2010, 11:19 PM
 
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When my dd was that age we had to wake for daycare and my early class so I would wake her when the alarm went off. If we didn't have something that I needed to do though I would be asleep with her and I would not be happy if someone or something woke her before she was ready to wake on her own.
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#4 of 28 Old 09-07-2010, 11:20 PM
 
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NEVER, NEVER, NEVER!!!! My goodness, you know how long it took me to get her to sleep???

(Except I'm going to try it tomorrow morning, to try to get her nap in before we leave for our first Mommy & Me get-together.)

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#5 of 28 Old 09-07-2010, 11:24 PM
 
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In general, no definetly not. Heck, I avoid waking ds1 up whenever possible and he's 3.5 I will though, if he's slept particularly long or didn't go down till late... just to avoid having him up at like 9 or 10pm
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#6 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 12:07 AM
 
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All depends on the child. I could take Joy anywhere asleep or awake. If she woke up, she'd just go back to sleep. She was known to fall asleep in the middle of Christmas celebrations nestled in the midst of all the wrapping paper. We didn't wake Erica unless it was a matter of life or death. The results weren't pretty and lasted hours. Angela and Dylan were fine with getting woken up before they were ready. But waking up early from their nap didn't mean that they would go to bed any earlier. Neither did putting them down early insure that they would get in the same amount of nap. It was either wake them up early for the event or not schedule the event until the after their normal wake up from the nap. Dylan usual bedtime was 10 pm whether or not he had a nap that day or how long the nap was. Getting his usual nap meant that he was a more pleasant child in the evening instead of a walking, cranky zombie.

Chris--extended breastfeeding, cloth diapering, babywearing, co-sleeping, APing, CLW, homeschooling before any of this was a trend mom to Joy (1/78), Erica (8/80), Angela (9/84), Dylan (2/98)
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#7 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 12:46 AM
 
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No way. If DD was sleeping at 21 months I would have been thankful, gosh the girl was up 3xs alone last night and she's almost 4.

The only time I woke DS up was when he was a day old and had slept 7 hours w/out eating, my boobs needed him to eat, so I woke him up.

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#8 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 12:47 AM
 
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absolutely wake them. I had my kids sleeping and napping on a schedule (they slept so much better this way) and part of getting them to bed at the right time was waking them up so they wouldn't sleep too long. Granted the only time they did not wake up on their own when it was time was when they were or had been sick (if they were sick I would never wake them, but if they were readjusting I would wake them at the proper time so they would nap at the proper time), if we were cutting a nap or changing a bed time. otherwise they usually woke up around the same time every day (give or take an hour. it was a pretty flexible schedule)

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#9 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 12:52 AM
 
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never ever. DS is 11 months old, and I still thank god (out loud) if I mention or even remember that he is sleeping. it's 11pm and he's still up.

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#10 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 05:08 AM
 
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Never, ever when they were a baby. At 21 months old? It would depend what time it was, how long they had been asleep for etc.

With DS1, who is 5yo, it's easier just to keep him awake because if he sleeps he'll be up until I go to bed and if I wake him up he has an hour long screaming, crying tantrum. So not fun.

It's complicated.
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#11 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 10:15 AM
 
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No. I have woken my kids if we absolutely have to go somewhere, but normally, no. Even when my 4 year old falls asleep at 5pm, I let him sleep and deal with him staying up late.
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#12 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 10:19 AM
 
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We wake DS (19mos) sometimes -- he sleeps late & we have to wake him up to get places occasionally, though I try to schedule around him as much as possible, and sometimes we have to wake him if he took a late nap, so he's not up 'til 2am. I don't care if he's up late but 2am is just way too late for ME.

I hate doing it & I almost always regret it. If at all possible, I try to catch him between sleep cycles. He wakes frequently so if he wakes up & I know I'd have to wake him anyway within a half hour or so, I encourage him to fully wake rather than go back to sleep. That seems way easier on him than waking him out of a dead sleep!

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#13 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 11:06 AM
 
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Usually not. I've almost never had the occasion to wake DS (9.5 mo) from a nap, because they're rarely longer than 45 min! I will wake him in the morning, though, if he sleeps much past seven. I find it difficult to get him to nap later in the day if he sleeps in. He's always been a good nighttime sleeper, though. But I only need to wake him in the morning once every week or two.
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#14 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 12:30 PM
 
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I would wake a sleeping baby to take them out of the car and put them into a baby carrier. If they were tired they always went right back to sleep.

We didn't do scheduled naps. I always found that a schedule just emerged for the most part, and changed as the child's needs changed. I tried very hard to respect the sleep cues we got from our kids, but sometimes it just wasn't possible.

Especially when a child was in the process of gradually dropping a nap I found that it was necessary to wake them as the alternative was a steady downward spiral with regard to their sleep... late nap, late night, early morning, overtired child, restless sleep from being overtired, bad mood, resisting sleep when tired, etc.

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#15 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 12:39 PM
 
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I do it to manipulate nap schedules. I wake them in the morning so they will fall asleep at everybody else's nap time.

I wake them gently though.
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#16 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 12:55 PM
 
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I only do it if we need to get somewhere on time. It makes DD so grumpy and her napping never seems to effect her sleeping she's never slept too long, I didn't know that was possible, naps seem too short.

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#17 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 01:05 PM
 
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I think it depends on the child and the situation.

There are good reasons for waking a baby/toddler, such as needing to leave the house. If your baby happens to be asleep and you have a doctor's appointment, it's fine to wake them so you can go, for example.

Some children do best if they are woken up in the morning or after a nap so they can be on some sort of schedule (even a mellow one). One of my kids was like that. If she had a busy morning, she could sleep ALL afternoon and half the evening. If I allowed her to do that, she be up all night and things would just go down hill. It really was more compassionate to limit nap time.

but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif

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#18 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 02:56 PM
 
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DS1 was a very placid laid back baby. He had to be woken. Mostly to eat. Or I bet he would just sleep for days without eating! lol He also likes routine - still does at 5. I used to often wake him from a nap because he could sleep for HOURS and if I just let him sleep and sleep, then a whole lot of things could get all wacky for us and he would really be a very unhappy bunny!

DS2 is the kind of baby that when he finally DOES fall asleep - don't wake him! For the love of God... let him sleep! Cause chances are, hes been awake for the past 8 hours 100% attached to a boob! lol Hes not so fussed about routine. Hes mostly in a sling so he is pretty portable that way. The only time I worry about when to leave/go/come back from somewhere is when it invovles the car - because he hates that. So far, I havn't found any consistancy there though! lol

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#19 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 03:20 PM
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Yes, exactly-- BIG difference between a little baby and a bigger toddler and trying to ease them up during a light phase in sleep can help a lot.
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#20 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 04:58 PM
 
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I generally go by the never wake a sleeping baby rule, but of course there are times when it must/should be broken. For me those might be: a late nap that (if you don't wake them now) will mean bedtime will be pushed back to midnight, or needing to get out of the house for an appointment (picking up an older kid from school, etc). It changes as they get older too. Now my ds is almost three and never naps at home, but sometimes in the car. When he was smaller I would sit with him in the car and let him continue to sleep. Now I just wake him up when we get wherever we're going.

Kate, mom to 7 year old Djuna and 4 yr old Alden. Missing our good friend Hal the cat who died June 2, 2010

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#21 of 28 Old 09-08-2010, 05:05 PM
 
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When dd1 was a baby, and she fell asleep in the car, I would wake her up every.single.time and put her in the sling. I thought I was trying to be AP mother of the world.
This time around I realized how selfish I had been the first time. If she falls asleep, I click the bucket into the stroller. I stash the Ergo, Moby, sling, whatever, at the bottom for when she wakes up. This way we are all happy and not just me.
I wold avoid waking a 21-month-old baby unless the baby had slept for a really, really loooooong time and it would screw up his schedule.

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#22 of 28 Old 09-09-2010, 09:16 AM
 
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Dh and I joke all thet ime abotu this. We use the never shake a baby slogan but change shake to wake.

SO for us its a big fat no.

Mamma to dd1 3/8/07, one 9.5.08, and dd2 9/9/09
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#23 of 28 Old 09-09-2010, 09:47 AM
 
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I have no qualms about waking a sleeping baby at all.

Toddlers are different, they are harder to get to sleep and not likely to fall back asleep, so I tried to avoid waking a sleeping toddler and plan stuff around naps. It wasn't always possible though.

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#24 of 28 Old 09-09-2010, 02:35 PM
 
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I prettty much stick to never wake a sleeping baby. With older kids being run around to various activities/outings, I can't stick to it as well as I'd like, but I try. I lugged dd2 around in her "bucket" far longer than I ever would have in the past, simply because she was asleep when I picked ds2 up from preschool, and there was no way I was spending a whole afternoon dealing with a cranky baby, because I wanted to make it easy for myself by putting her in the Ergo. Fortunately, I don't have that many errands of that sort these days.

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#25 of 28 Old 09-09-2010, 02:38 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ameliabedelia View Post
Toddlers are different, they are harder to get to sleep and not likely to fall back asleep,
Oh, my...three of my four were like this from the get go. Actually, make that two...ds1 never took real naps. He cat napped, even as a newborn - usually about 10 minutes at a time, and almost never more than 15-20. OTOH, he very rarely woke more than once at night, so there were upsides. DD1 woke up at the drop of a hat. Sleep was really hard for her when she was a baby, but got better as she got older (including as a toddler). DS2 was a great sleeper...six hours the night he was born, woke up ravenous, nursed a long time, then slept for 2-3 hours again. DD2 has been rough that way. She's hard to get down for a nap, and if something wakes her up, it's going to be hellish for hours.

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#26 of 28 Old 09-09-2010, 11:01 PM
 
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Waking my DD up never turns out well. She is over 3 and having to stay up late is better than dealing with her behavior when you wake her before she is ready.
My baby, who is now 1, I haven't yet ever needed to wake him so I have never tried.
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#27 of 28 Old 09-11-2010, 10:04 PM
 
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Only if there's really no other choice. Bad enough with babies, but waking up a sleeping toddler before he or she is ready to get up is guaranteed to end up with an overtired, cranky kid, often with either temper tantrums or hyper, obnoxious behavior as a result. A few times we've just had no choice--event we all had to go to together, either scheduled at an inopportune time for nap or the kid's nap just went unexpectedly long or started late. We do our best to get the kid in question to soldier through, but it's really not ideal.

Once we were on our way back from somewhere, trying to get home to get the 2yo down for a nap, when both the 2yo and 4yo fell asleep in their car seats. These are not kids who can be transferred from car seat to bed and stay asleep. I was such a kid, but they're not. We decided to go for a loooooooong drive. So the environmental footprint of their naps that day was tragic, but our sanity was preserved.

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#28 of 28 Old 09-12-2010, 07:49 AM
 
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Definitely, I will wake a sleeping baby. From about 9 months old, I wake them if they are napping any later than about 4pm, just to ensure a smooth bedtime around 7-8pm.

Both my kids fall asleep almost instantly when we get in the car also, so I'm always having to wake them when we arrive at our destination. Sometimes it's 2 minutes after they've fallen asleep, but aside from driving around aimlessly, there's not a lot I can do about that

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