Funny things your kids say - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 03:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I've not seen one of these here ina while, and I know we can all use a good laugh now and then. Who better to entertain us than our littles?

DSS has been practicing his typing on a rock-star typing game. He was sitting at the computer, and DD was sitting at the table eating.

Computer game: "Are you ready to rock?!!"
DD: "No, I'm not. I'm eating dippy eggs." hahah!

What are your funnies?

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#2 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 03:51 PM
 
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My 4 year old always asks, "mama, can I give you a question?" It is too cute and I don't want to correct her because one day she'll say it right, and for now it's a cute thing she does.

Me Wife to T (14 years)Mama to Princess(4) and Monster Boy(my 1 year old ):
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#3 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 03:55 PM
 
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right now, my not quite 2YO favorite response is NO WAY. Not no, or nope, but no way.

And its also the way he says it.

Matthew you want your gummy? (vit c) No way.

matthew are you playing with Charlie? No way.

Cracks me up.

Instead of "What happened Mama?" Charlies used to say, MAMA, Boppin? Gosh I miss that. Hes so articulate now.
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#4 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 04:08 PM
 
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2.5 year old DS asks, "you wrap me round a towel?" when he wants to get out of the tub.

Also, when DS started to call the baby Oss (for Oscar) instead of just Aw, I tried to get him to say Oscar by drawing attention to the fact that it was Oss-car... since DS can say oss and car he should be able to say Oscar. Nope. Instead, DS informed me, in no uncertain terms, that "Aw not a car, cars go outside, drive on the road, Aw is Ossy". Now we call the baby Ozzy sometimes.... which I guess is better than Aw or Oss.

Our second DD calls centipedes censa-pedes. For the longest time she couldn't say Tattoo either. It came out Two-Two-Tat. She also tells us all the time about the parts of nursery rhymes that they forgot to write down... there's apparently a pumpkin in Hey Diddle Diddle.

Julie - Mom to Elizabeth (Libby) age 6, Penelope (Penny) age 5, Elliott age 29 months, and Oscar who is 1 year old!
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#5 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 04:09 PM
 
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The other day after Halloween costume shopping with me. My dd (6) starts telling me in the car: "mama, someday I'm going to have a Halloween costume shop with tons of costumes". Then she added: "and don't worry mom, I'll make sure and have plenty of trashy costumes in it for you".



No idea where she gets this stuff from.


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#6 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 04:15 PM
 
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When DH does something for DD she replies, "thanks babe" to her dad. I think it's so cute because she's imitating what she hears me say to him. It's cute but a reminder to watch what I say in front of her so anything I don't want her to repeat doesn't come out of her mouth.
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#7 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 04:21 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CrazyCatLady View Post
"and don't worry mom, I'll make sure and have plenty of trashy costumes in it for you".




ROTFLMAO!!!

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#8 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 04:23 PM
 
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not toward me, but hysterical nonetheless -

8yo niece to her mom "i wish my arm jiggled like that when i brush my teeth"

mom to Andrew   born Feb 6th, already a mom to child with fur; and still missing and still wondering about the lost possibilities Mar 17, 2009
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#9 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 04:29 PM
 
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my three year old son pointed me and his dad out to an acquaintance across a room. He said, "That's my Dad. That's my Mom." waited a beat, then said, "They're good guys." Cracked me up!

After a particularly rambunctious jump onto the couch, he slid down and said, “Oh man! What is going on with me?”

If he’s full, he says, “I’m full up to my neck.”

all of which is made even funnier by his very expressive face and voice. Kid is a drama king)
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#10 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 07:35 PM
 
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DD's recent one is "I died". She'll roll her eyes back in her head, collapse face-down on the couch, and say in a matter-of-fact but muffled way from under her curls, "I died". She's 2.5. Don't know where she got it from, but it's very cute.

She's also been known to say sweetly "I want to shoot you in the head. Pkew pkew! Aww, poor Mummy. Get a hug?" Which I suspect would horrify many of you fine ladies, but we're nasty and morbid and maladjusted and think it's amusing.

She also requested the other day that I "draw nekkid Superman!". I said "Dude, I'm not drawing naked Superman", and she put my hand, holding the pen, to the page and firmly said "Try".

I don't know what we did wrong.

If decomposition persists please see your necromancer.

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#11 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 07:51 PM
 
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A few gems from DS (almost 2.5) as of late...

*slams doll repeatedly on coffee table* "Awww, poor baby. He bumped his head. He needs a snuggle."

DS: I love you, mama.
Me: I love you, Isaac.
DS: I love you, mama.
Me: I love you, Isaac.
DS: I love you, mama.
Me: I love you, Isaac.
DS: I love you, mama.
Me: I love you, Isaac.
DS: I love you, mama.
Me: I love you, Isaac.
DS: I love... COOKIES! Can I have a cookie?

DS (to visiting friend): I want to play with my penis. Gonna go in my bedroom.

Me+DH+DS1+DS2+Dog=me and a house full of guys, which is really just peachy, thanks.
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#12 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 09:04 PM
 
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DS (26 months) is another one who enjoys saying "No way!" in answer to yes or no questions.

He also has recently started exclaiming "Oh my god!" - which is a little puzzling since DH and I usually don't use that phrase much, though I do say "oh my goodness" fairly often. A funny example...we were recently on vacation and our hotel room had a microwave in it. DS was looking at the time on the microwave and said, "It's an upside-down 6, Mommy." I walked over and said, "really? where?" He pointed and I said, "Actually, that's a right-side-up 6." With a voice full of surprise and absolute delight he exclaimed, "Oh My God!"

Another cute one...over the weekend, DH went to get DS when he woke up in the morning. I stayed in bed and DH came back in and deposited DS into our bed so he (DH) could go pee and stuff. DS snuggled up to me and said, "Hi, Mommy. It's good to see you."

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#13 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 09:05 PM
 
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Quote:
DS (to visiting friend): I want to play with my penis. Gonna go in my bedroom.



My dd did the same thing when she was four. She announced to a whole house full of people: "I am going to go to the bedroom and play with myself now!"

Melaya (29) - Mom to Z (9) and soon to be I (due Nov 2013) stork-boy.gif

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#14 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 09:17 PM
 
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#15 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 09:36 PM
 
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My 4.5yo says he likes to have a messy room. The other day I was sweeping the kitchen.

DS: What are you doing mama?
Me: Cleaning the floor so DS2 (16 mo) doesn't eat stuff off it.
DS: Oh don't worry then mama. DS2 can be our own personal vacuum! And you won't have to clean any more. Do you want to play with me now?

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#16 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 09:45 PM
 
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No full sentences yet, but DD seems to be trying out words a whole lot these days.

Can you say "glasses"? "Dasses!"

What's a cat say? "Melow, melow."

Want some cheese? "Tseese!"

Who's that over there? "Bampa!"

"Mama!" is still my favourite, though.

Woman, Wife, Mom to beautiful DD (10/14/09), Copywriter, occasionally tearing my hair out but usually pretty happy about it all
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#17 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 09:52 PM
 
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DD (2.5) Is interested in breasts lately, like how I have breasts and she has nipples, etc. Dh got dd up the other morning and brought her into bed for a snuggle. He didn't have a shirt on and dd looks at me and says, " Mommy. You have nipples...and daddy has BIG boobs!"

I have a good friend T who is quite a bit taller than I am. DD said to me the other day, " Mommy some day you'll grow up to be big like T!" Thanks honey!

Let's see... what else? She told me that Cocos ( coconut) milk makes the batteries in her tummy run better. My favorite thing though was when I was telling her she is beautiful, but most importantly she has a beautiful heart. She turns to me and says, " Oh Mommy! You beautiful in your tummy!"

Mother to one Little Flower Childdust.gif 3/08 and one little squirmy boy babyf.gif 4/12 homebirth.jpg, Wife to fuzmalesling.gif,I am a Vegan Pagan. We familybed1.gifnovaxnocirc.gif mdcblog5.gif!

 

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#18 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 10:28 PM
 
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#19 of 23 Old 09-29-2010, 10:37 PM
 
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I love this story.

We went on vacation last week, and DH and I were doing some planning at dinner. We decided to set off at 5am to avoid rush hour.

Me: "... we won't even get the kids dressed, we'll just throw them in the car in their PJs..."

here my 3yo interrupted, looking VERY worried. "I don't want to be thrown in the car. I want to be placed gently in the car."

We assured her that we would not actually "throw" her in the car. It takes a little bit of convincing, but eventually the worry lines on her little face cleared, and she very confidently says:

"And then you can throw my brother in the car."

I think she was really looking forward to seeing us literally toss my 18mo into the back seat and drive off.

Trying to live a simple life in a messy house in a complicated world with : DH, DD (b. 07/07), DS (b. 02/09), and DD (b. 10/10)
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#20 of 23 Old 09-30-2010, 08:44 PM
 
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It just amazes me to wonder what's going on in her head sometimes....

Yesterday, I took 3 year old DD out for pizza for lunch. We're in the car afterwards, going home.
Me: Did you like the pizza?
DD: Yes, it was very good. [long pause] When am I going to get my brown skin?
Me: Huh? What do you mean?
DD: Well, my white skin is ok but I want to know when I'm going to get my brown skin.

She was rather disappointed to learn that you can't change colors later when you get tired of the old one.

Mama to DD (06/30/07).
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#21 of 23 Old 10-01-2010, 06:11 PM
 
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DD, yesterday: "I got a baby in my tummy! Hmm... not very much. Maybe just a doughnut."

If decomposition persists please see your necromancer.

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#22 of 23 Old 10-02-2010, 01:17 PM
 
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While listening to "You Can't Say That on the Radio" by Trick Pony (in which there are a lot of strategic "bleeps" to demonstrate you can't say *that* on the radio)......


DS (8) "Mom, I've never been able to figure out where curse words go in a sentence. I mean, are they nouns, verbs, adjectives....?"
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#23 of 23 Old 10-03-2010, 12:07 AM
 
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DD is 6 and we're all still sharing the family bed/s. I asked her the other day when she'd be ready for her own bed and her reply was, "When I'm 24." 24?!?
I'm so never going to make baby number 3...

A wandering magazine salesman came to the door a couple of days ago. He had a cane and he walked up our 1/2 mile driveway. I could tell DD was fascinated. He was a little creepy though so I tried to get rid of him faster. Then he got out the REALLY hard sale by telling me how nice my yard looked, etc. He remarked that all the fresh air must be why I didn't look a day over 30. That's when DD piped up with, "How long have you been walking?!?!"

I'm 38...
And I look it too. Even DD thinks so!

secular classical-ish mama to an incredible 5 year old DS and an amazing 6 year old DD.
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