WWYD if....... - Mothering Forums
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Parenting > WWYD if.......
MammaB21's Avatar MammaB21 12:00 PM 11-17-2010

Your DC wet their pants at a public play place/play ground? Today we went to an indoor playplace and one of the kids had had an accident while playing there. The parents seemingly didn't have a change of clothes, but chose to let the child continue to play. I can see not wanting to pull your DC from the fun, especially if you don't live close enough to run home for a change of clothing. But it's not a decision I would have made for my DC and I was just curious what everyone else would do. I see a couple things wrong with allowing the play to continue. 1) It's not sanitary for the rest of the kids. This child was going down slides and such and I saw other parents really freaked out about it. To the point where they were steering their kids away from this child. 2) I'd be afraid my DC would get teased. This did end up happenig today. A few kids were teasing and I heard my DD say to him, "I feel bad for you." I told her afterward that I was glad she didn't join in on the teasing because everyone has accidents and it's not nice to tease.

Other than not wanting my DC to feel 'punished' for having an accident, I can't think of a reason to make the decision not to pull my DC from the play and head home to clean up and change. Would any of you make the same decision these parents did, and if so enlighten me as to why?


S



earthmama369's Avatar earthmama369 12:02 PM 11-17-2010

No way. Unsanitary. I don't want to sit or put my hands on someone else's pee, and it was incredibly inconsiderate that the parents thought it was ok for everyone else's children to do so. And that the employees would appreciate having to sanitize the entire play area rather than just the one area where the accident first occurred.


mamalisa's Avatar mamalisa 12:06 PM 11-17-2010

Depending on the situation, I'd most likely scurry to the closest McDonald's and blow dry their pants or run over to the closest Target and grab new pants and head back to the happy fun place if it was a "big deal" kind of place to be or far from home.  


BunnySlippers's Avatar BunnySlippers 12:18 PM 11-17-2010

I would take my child home; both for her confort and safety (who wants cold wet pants irritating their skin?), and for teh health and safety of other kids.

 

I would have engaged the caregeiver/parent in finding a solution that results in no urine being smeared around a playground, where kids touch with thier hands then rub thier eyes or put thier fingers in their mouths. Eew.


Caneel's Avatar Caneel 12:25 PM 11-17-2010


Quote:
Originally Posted by mamalisa View Post

Depending on the situation, I'd most likely scurry to the closest McDonald's and blow dry their pants or run over to the closest Target and grab new pants and head back to the happy fun place if it was a "big deal" kind of place to be or far from home.  



It happened to us once and I did what mamalisa describes, I washed his shorts in the sink and dried them with the blower.

 

Not only must it have been uncomfortable for that child to be urine-soaked, it is completely unacceptable to intentionally let bodily fluids be smeared all over a public play area.


jeanine123's Avatar jeanine123 12:55 PM 11-17-2010

We'd go home.  There's no way I'd knowingly allow my child to continue to play if they had wet their pants.  It's disgusting, unsanitary and unfair for the other kids.


Mama Lo's Avatar Mama Lo 01:02 PM 11-17-2010

I would definately not allow my child to continue playing on the playground with pee-soaked pants, yuck!

I would have either left and went home to change if I didn't have clothes with me or drove the closest cheap place to pick up a new pair of pants.

Just last weekend my dd had an accident in a hardware store and we were on our way to work on our new house, so instead of making the trek back home and I stopped at Dollar General and picked up a cheap outfit and pack on undies. 


lyterae's Avatar lyterae 01:05 PM 11-17-2010

Depending on how far from home we were, we would either a.) find the closest place to buy her a change of clothes or b.) head directly home.

 

Besides the fact that I would not allow her to continue playing in wet clothes, she would be throwing an absolute fit. She does not enjoy having wet clothes of any kind.


EdnaMarie's Avatar EdnaMarie 01:09 PM 11-17-2010

Unsanitary and unhealthy: who keeps their kid in urine-soaked clothes?  You could get a rash.  Sorry, you have an accident, the consequence is changing clothes and yes you have to leave for a short time.  That's not a punishment, that's life.

 

We live in a pretty rural area.  I like the idea of picking up a cheap pair of leggings and underwear at the nearest dollar store or whatever.  Or borrowing clothes, even!  I would totally loan extra clothes, if I had them, to a child in need.  Even give them.

 

Note to self: Doesn't matter if child has not had an accident in years.  Bring a change of clothes.  I really should just keep one in the car.


limabean's Avatar limabean 01:16 PM 11-17-2010

This happened to me once -- it was awful! I took my DS and two of his friends (who were brothers) miniature golfing for my DS's birthday. All the boys went pee right before we left, and the drive to the mini golf place was 10 minutes. The younger boy (4yo) had an accident on the way there, but I didn't notice his wet shorts until we were playing the first hole of the golf course. I rushed back to the desk and asked if they sold shorts or sweats or something, or if there was a lost and found we could scrounge a pair of shorts from, but they said no. I stood around wondering what to do for a few minutes, and then I checked his shorts again and they were pretty much dry (it was over 100 degrees that day) so we just played on.

 

I felt terrible, but at least he was standing the whole time so the urine didn't get on any play equipment, and it dried really fast due to the heat. I brought his booster seat inside his parents' house when I dropped him off so they could clean it, and the mom didn't seem surprised at all and mentioned that this sort of thing happens with him all the time -- I was actually pretty annoyed that she didn't warn me and send some extra clothes so that I wouldn't have to deal with that in the middle of my DS's birthday celebration. 


neetling's Avatar neetling 01:25 PM 11-17-2010

 We were at an outdoor park the summer before last and this little boy just whipped it out and peed down a slide.  In my OCDish horror I shouted "Hey!  He's peeing down the slide" to his adult.  They didn't bother to walk to the restroom 20 feet away and try to clean it up.  They just left.  I found a maintenance worker and told them and warned other near parents not to let their kids slide in the pee puddle. Then we left,   An accident I would have understood, but I saw this kid doing it on purpose.  I was more angry with his adults than him because he seemed young, though clearly older than a toddler.  And he was playing with his urine stream, clearly not having an accident.

 

If it happened to one of my kids, I'd either go home or stop and get them an inexpensive replacement.  I'd also try to clean it up.


tabrizia's Avatar tabrizia 01:33 PM 11-17-2010

We've actually gotten to the playground before and I realized DS' diaper wasn't put on quite right so he peed his pants.  Which since I didn't have a change of pants for him meant we went home.  I felt bad about it for him, but he isn't going to play in peed in pants.  Not sanitary for him or the other kids.  That being said, I normally try to have an extra change of clothes in the car for both DS and DD, just in case.

 

I would never just let him or DD continue to play after peeing their pants.  It sucks for them especially since it was just an accident, but it happens.


Latte Mama's Avatar Latte Mama 02:53 PM 11-17-2010

Those parents were very inconsiderate.  I would have talked to an employee there.  If it happened to my DS I would either take him home, get him a new pair of pants, or do the wash in the sink/dryer deal.  No way would I let him run around in pee soaked clothes.


Youngfrankenstein's Avatar Youngfrankenstein 02:58 PM 11-17-2010

So I probably shouldn't tell all of you about the time my ds, age three at the time, took off his poopy underwear and left it in the play place.hide.gif  I found out later when I asked him where his underpants were.  Fun times....


waiting2bemommy's Avatar waiting2bemommy 03:10 PM 11-17-2010

ok I would never intentionally allow my kid to continue to play wet. But when ds was newly potty trained a couple of times he did wet himself at the mcdonalds playplace. I usually took him into the bathroom, rinsed the underwear out and wrung them out for later washing, then blow dried the pants and put him back in them commando to play. This is very embarrassing to admit but we didn't have a car at that time, I had no moeny to buy new clothes and the mcdonalds was a 3 mile walk from my house.

 

once he actually pooped in the tunnel and one of the other kids told me. I had to crawl into the tunnel myself to retrieve the poop and throw it out, then crawl in a second time to sanitize it. I probably could have insisted that one of the employees do it, but I didn't think would be fair. It was really, really embarrassing though.


MusicianDad's Avatar MusicianDad 04:54 PM 11-17-2010

For my child I would take them home so they can change pants and be clean and dry again. Before leaving though, I would alert the staff that my child had an accident and for health and safety reasons they should clean up.


St. Margaret 05:56 PM 11-17-2010

EW.  I would have said something to the employees pretty quickly, and demanded they do something.  And I might expect a pass for a free time to come back, if something like that went on for very long unaddressed. 

 

We were actually at a play place this weekend and our friends' kid had an accident.  They just dashed to the store right there to get her clean leggings.  I told them when I heard that I always have a change for DD in our backpack and they could always ask for it.  We might be getting to the point before long (esp as we add baby #2 and his diapers) where we'll leave it in the trunk of the car all the time, instead, because she is 3.5 and she's been pretty good for a while.  I would never stay-- I like the tip about washing them out and drying in the bathroom!  That's life sometimes.  If it were something REALLY important where you NEEDED to be at a store or post office or whatever, for not just a regular errand, I might push through if the pee were contained to just my kid, and hope they were not too uncomfy or got a rash, but I would never do what they did in the OP.  CRAZY inconsiderate all around.


Super~Single~Mama 06:01 PM 11-17-2010


Quote:
Originally Posted by Youngfrankenstein View Post

So I probably shouldn't tell all of you about the time my ds, age three at the time, took off his poopy underwear and left it in the play place.hide.gif  I found out later when I asked him where his underpants were.  Fun times....



This just made me laugh out loud - literally!!  Kids do the darndest things.  Seriously, sometimes I just don't get it!


colleen2851's Avatar colleen2851 06:27 PM 11-17-2010
I wouldn't sped to the nearest store - with my cold - to get a new pair of pants.
cappuccinosmom's Avatar cappuccinosmom 06:58 PM 11-17-2010

None of my kids would keep playing with wet pants.  They'd come to me wanting to go home (or to the car for fresh clothes, if I had them).

 

My middle kid taught me to keep clean clothes that were seasonally appropriate and properly sized in the car.  We were at a fall festival at a farm.  He told me he had to pee, but too late, and he soaked himself right down to his shoes and socks.  I did have clean clothes in the car, but they were shorts, and it was November.  So he looked a little funny in his jacket, boots, and shorts.  But he didn't want to leave and we stayed until he was too cold.

 

I think it would be unfair to the child in question, and unfair to the other children playing (and their parents) to let the kid continue playing in pee-soaked pants.  Yes, urine is sterile when it comes out, but it doesn't *stay* sterile.  And it can't be enjoyable playing in wet pants. 


Everrgreen's Avatar Everrgreen 07:17 PM 11-17-2010

Yeah, even my 21 month old will come and tell me when his pants are wet from a diaper leak.  I guess all kids are different about that kind of thing though.  But definitely as the parent I would be going home or going somewhere nearby to get a clean pair.  My ds actually did have a diaper leak at a public play place and I hadn't even brought an extra diaper with me (dumb, I know).  Luckily the play place had a diaper I could use and they even searched through a bin of extra pants but none of them would fit my ds, so he just played in his shirt and a diaper. 


Llyra's Avatar Llyra 07:13 AM 11-18-2010
I don't think that urine is a huge health risk. But it's still gross, and humiliating to the child, to leave a child running around in urine-soaked clothing. If it were me-- I always have changes of clothes in the car. Always. I've learned, through hard knocks, that even older kids should have a change, if they're going anywhere that's too far to just drop home. Things happen-- and not just pee. Kids get sick and throw up. They have ugly encounters with mud. They spill food on themselves.

If I didn't have clothes- we'd go home. If we were far from home, we'd go straight to wherever we could get clean clothes-- a Wal-mart, if need be. Those are everywhere. I like the idea of rinsing and drying out the clothes, too, if nothing else is going to work.

I wouldn't just dry, though, without rinsing. Even if the clothes are dry, the child still smells like urine, and the ammonia in the fabric still chafes and irritates the skin.
mamazee's Avatar mamazee 07:19 AM 11-18-2010

Go home or go somewhere nearby to buy new pants, and let the people there know so they could clean it up properly.


MammaB21's Avatar MammaB21 10:15 AM 11-18-2010

Wow, I was half expecting at least one person to harp on me about this post. I was prepared for comments like, "how do you know it was pee and not a spill in a bad spot?" and "how do you know the parents didn't know?" I know the parents saw because the child ran back and forth to his parents several times while there. They had a baby with them as well and a back pack and laptop so I was under the impression they were far from home. But we were at a McDonalds so they could have brought him to the bathroom and did the quick rinse and wash in the sink and then blow dry. I was just really surprised to see any parent putting their child and other children in that position.



kcstar's Avatar kcstar 10:36 AM 11-18-2010

The one time so far that it's happened to us, we took DS home.  He wasn't happy about it, but it got him clean, and he didn't contaminate the play equipment.


pianojazzgirl's Avatar pianojazzgirl 01:00 PM 11-18-2010

I'd definitely take my kid home for a change, or possibly go buy a cheap new pair of pants if it was somewhere super-fun that we had planned to stay at for a lot longer (assuming also that cheap pants store was closer than home!).

 

I wouldn't have thought of the wash-in-sink-and-dry-with-dryer idea, but I'll store it in the back of my head for future use!


kcparker's Avatar kcparker 01:05 PM 11-18-2010

Well, gosh, we don't go ANYWHERE without a change of clothes in either my purse or the baby's diaper bag. Accidents happen, ketchup happens, water happens. If we didn't have any though, we'd leave to go get cleaned up. It's not hygienic for the kid to be in soiled underwear, nor to be spreading bacteria all over the public place (but don't kid yourself that those places aren't covered in germs anyway).


broodymama's Avatar broodymama 01:14 PM 11-18-2010

I wouldn't let the child stay there and play, both for sanitary reasons and just because it would be embarrassing for them. 

 

That being said, I keep a gallon sized Ziploc bag (2 bags if they won't fit in 1) in the van with a season-appropriate change of clothes for my kids, even for my 6 year old.  My 2 year old and even occasionally my 4 year old will still need them for an accident.  Or we'll end up at a park that has a lake or beach and they all end up soaked (or caught in the rain playing in the park) and need a dry change of clothes for the ride home.  Or someone spills something, or gets sick.  In the back of the van I have a small under the bed storage container that has our emergency supplies and also has extra jackets and some towels.  And an old pail liner for toting home all the wet clothes.  And a pair of dry pants for me, on the off-chance I have to go wading into some freezing cold lake after a kid.  It doesn't take up as much room as it sounds.  redface.gif  We go on day trips up to the mountains frequently, and all this stuff comes in handy.


Storm Bride's Avatar Storm Bride 01:21 PM 11-18-2010

We'd leave. I can't imagine leaving a child to play in wet pants, especially in a public play space. Mind you, I'm also pretty anal about having a change of clothes for any child that's even remotely likely to wet their pants, for precisely this reason. (I kept a change of clothes for ds2 with me for months after the last time he had an accident, just in case.)

 

Most kids I've known wouldn't have wanted to keep playing in wet pants, but ds2 was mostly unbothered by it, and one of my nephews doesn't care at all.


ParisApril 01:22 PM 11-18-2010


Quote:
Originally Posted by limabean View Post

This happened to me once -- it was awful! I took my DS and two of his friends (who were brothers) miniature golfing for my DS's birthday. All the boys went pee right before we left, and the drive to the mini golf place was 10 minutes. The younger boy (4yo) had an accident on the way there, but I didn't notice his wet shorts until we were playing the first hole of the golf course. I rushed back to the desk and asked if they sold shorts or sweats or something, or if there was a lost and found we could scrounge a pair of shorts from, but they said no. I stood around wondering what to do for a few minutes, and then I checked his shorts again and they were pretty much dry (it was over 100 degrees that day) so we just played on.

 

I felt terrible, but at least he was standing the whole time so the urine didn't get on any play equipment, and it dried really fast due to the heat. I brought his booster seat inside his parents' house when I dropped him off so they could clean it, and the mom didn't seem surprised at all and mentioned that this sort of thing happens with him all the time -- I was actually pretty annoyed that she didn't warn me and send some extra clothes so that I wouldn't have to deal with that in the middle of my DS's birthday celebration. 


This happened to DS this summer as well.  We had been talking about go carting and mini golfing on the last night of our vacation for the whole week.  We went go carting and then made it to the mini golf place just at the cutoff for closing and the guy was nice and let us play.  Two holes in DS(5) potty trained since 15 months, had an accident.  We had biked there from the cottage.  Option 1 - Take DS back to the cottage and call it a night.  We would never have made it back and been able to play.  He would have been devastated.  Option 2 - Play on.  Since we were the last people playing for the night and DS insisted he was good to go we stayed and played.  It was warm out and DS dried quickly.   I would never in a million years have even considered that had it been indoors.

 

I was at a playgroup one time and a little girl had an accident.  The mom was going to make her stay in the wet clothes because that was her punishment for wetting herself!  The girl was sitting on a fabric couch beside her mom and the lady who ran the group had to tell her that was unacceptable to leave her in soiled clothing and gave her some clean pants to wear.


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