Do you hide your SEX books from your kids? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 35 Old 03-16-2011, 08:24 AM
 
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If that's your introduction to sex, that is an odd way to be introduced.

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Originally Posted by sublimeliving View Post


I agree! I found my parent's sex books when I was 6 or 7, and I never thought of sex or my parents the same way. The whole incident was really disturbing, and I felt like I was introduced to sex in an odd and inappropriate way. 

 

 



 


Like a PP, I have been very very open with my son from a very early age about sex and sexuality. My husband and I have medical texts laying about and as soon as DS showed an interest, we read those to him and did not shy from showing him the human body, and let him pick what he wanted to learn about. He went through a phase at 4 or 5 where he wanted to know all about the penis and vagina and we told him about ejaculate and how sperm travels to the fallopian tube to get to the egg and the egg chooses which sperm it allows in and showed him pictures. Etc etc etc. We also have explained the renal system, the gastrointestinal system the cardiovascular system and tried to present each as just how the body functions.

 

He has seen naked pictures of human beings as well as medical illustrations from this early age and we have not been shy about being naked around him, though now that he is seven, I have started to dress at least in underwear. That has to do with *my* modesty though.

 

I have shown him art throughout the ages, from Michelangelo's David to Goya to Nan Goldin and I have discussed that some people think that sex is naughty and they develop neuroses concerning it which manifest as shame and they start to depict sex in art or even just talk about it as if it were a sin. We talk about the concept of sin.

 

I know lots of people who would disapprove of this sort of talk. I know a woman who won't let her kid see Spongebob because it's too dangerous, but I think that with my DS, he seems to be developing a very healthy sense of what is right and wrong *for him* and choosing to ignore what he doesn't agree with, instead of thinking that he needs to be like everyone else. He understands that mores are generational and that concepts of morality are not absolute, but very relative to the current culture.

 

My parents discussed nothing with me. I was left to fend for myself. They gave me a really silly book when I was in 4th grade, Where Did I Come From. It was ridiculous and I couldn't bear to look at it. THAT was my introduction to the concept of sex from my parents. By that time I had heard it all already from friends and this was a humiliating experience for me. It was much more humiliating than finding a stash of porn in a shed down the street, which I had found months earlier with two boys from the neighborhood.

 

 

 


Momma to DS 1, age 8 and rainbow baby DS2 4-21-11.
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#32 of 35 Old 03-16-2011, 11:34 AM
 
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The closest thing I have to sex books are two Suicide Girl books. (Naked models, no porn). I leave them in the book shelf with everything else. I also have other books with nudity, (pregnancy, bf'ing, hippie books, etc), that are also on the book shelf. I plan on keeping them there since nudity and sex are natural parts of life.

 

If I had graphic or personal sex books or pictures then I probably would keep them somewhere private, (like I would with sex toys or things of that nature), because even though it's natural it wouldn't necessarily be age appropriate.


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#33 of 35 Old 03-16-2011, 08:30 PM
 
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Originally Posted by ShadowMoon View Post

The closest thing I have to sex books are two Suicide Girl books. (Naked models, no porn). I leave them in the book shelf with everything else. I also have other books with nudity, (pregnancy, bf'ing, hippie books, etc), that are also on the book shelf. I plan on keeping them there since nudity and sex are natural parts of life.

 

If I had graphic or personal sex books or pictures then I probably would keep them somewhere private, (like I would with sex toys or things of that nature), because even though it's natural it wouldn't necessarily be age appropriate.


^This.  I think age appropriateness is the biggest issue here.  I want my son to know all about wars and history and how terrible some things (like the Holocaust) were, but the "whole truth" so to speak with all the gory details will come down the line.   I feel the same way about sex.  So if a book wasn't in line with what I felt was age appropriate and building a solid foundation for him, I would probably keep them where he could reach or see.

 


Alissa: married to dh since 05/2006 and mama to Solomon (08/2009) and Ezra (04/2012).

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#34 of 35 Old 03-19-2011, 08:16 AM
 
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I only have one manual and it's on a shelf in my room. Ds is only 6 doesn't pay attention to that shelf, but at some point the title will grab him so I guess I'll put it away. I think there are some illustrations he won't need to see until later. My friend actually bought him a copy of the book for his time capsule we put together on his 1st bday to be opened on his 18th birthday. I will probably take it out and have him get it privately then, so he's not embarassed when he opens the time capsule.

It's very much a manual. My friend loves it because she married her first boyfriend and they were each other's first, so she gives it to people, it's not a very shocking manual.

 

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#35 of 35 Old 03-19-2011, 08:26 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoopin' Mama View Post

It's very much a manual. My friend loves it because she married her first boyfriend and they were each other's first, so she gives it to people, it's not a very shocking manual.

 


ooh curious minds want to know what it is.

 

and i would probably be giving that to my child at 14 (or whatever age i felt she was getting active sexually), not 18. i recall reading that kinda book (no pictures, just words) when i was in 8th grade. it was informational as well as about positions. 

 


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