|Originally posted by newmommy "Mainstream says formula versus breastfeeding is simply a lifestyle choice and that formula is "just as good" as breastmilk."Piglet, honestly where in the world are you getting this information? I have not heard 1 single doctor NOT encourage a mother to breastfeed. Including the AAP. Seriously...have you ever heard of Promoting National Breastfeeding Awareness Week? And WHO is Mainstream. Please tell me who this person is or who they are? Also can you find me some information that says this? Formula is a LAST LAST resort and for mamas who feel horrible to have to resort to it (for reasons beyond their control) They (the formula companies) say that they have tried to get formula (or the ingredients) as close as they possibly can to breastmilk 'but buyer beware, it will NEVER be the same so please try to breastfeed your baby'. This is promoted by most formula companies. Period.
Newmommy, Piglet didn't mention this, but upon reading her post I immediately agreed and thought of the most popular parenting books in the U.S. - all *mainstream* books, as mainstream (I believe in the sense Piglet meant) as it gets.
The single most popular and best-selling book is What To Expect when You're Expecting. I don't happen to have this book on hand here (ha ha!), so I will quote from the Kellymom (http://www.kellymom.com/reviews/revi...ttoexpect.html
|"... this series gives lip service to breastfeeding in the early months (though much of the info is quite outdated), but gets less and less supportive of breastfeeding as babies pass 6 months. Weaning is suggested well before 12 months. The authors also advocate letting baby cry (to do otherwise is "cowardly") and are very much against co-sleeping. Many moms I know have found that they have gone to the book with a question and come away feeling worried, inadequate and guilty. Here is a quote from What to Expect the First Year:
"'By the end of the first year, however, scientists tell us that breast milk ceases to be adequate--not only is its protein content is insufficient for the older baby, but it suffers from a decline in several vital nutrients including zinc, copper, and potassium. In the second year, infants require the nutrients in cow's milk, and the mother who is still breastfeeding should recognize that although both she and her baby may still be enjoying the experience, breast milk can't be considered a major source of nutrition for her baby. Nor do babies past a year appear to need the sucking breast feeding provides. In spite of much speculation, there's no solid evidence that nursing past the first year--or even well into the second or third or beyond--hinders a child's emotional development. But it does seem that prolonged breastfeeding, like prolonged bottlefeeding, can lead to dental decay.'"
Now THAT is mainstream. That is inarguably whaat the majority of Americans do and believe in (I don't wish to speak for other countries). The proof? This is the
top-selling pregnancy/childbirth/parenting series!
The other highly HIGHLY successful book series is "The Girlfriend's Guide." I myself actually read "The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy" from cover to cover during a particularly low point of my pregnancy and I can attest quite firmly that this book makes the choice between breastfeeding and formula feeding sound like the choice between two blouses to wear. I am throwing this in here because this is likewise one of the MOST POPULAR PREGNANCY/PARENTING book series out there. Americans are basically scarfing down the information in these - yes - mainstream books.
|Because these are just a FEW "AP" practices here. Consider this... What if she does not co-sleep? What if she vaccinates...ALL of them? What if she feels the urge to have some *her time* Is she still welcomed here? I really don't think so , again because of this STRICT adhered to label/term Attachment Parenting. I get the feeling here it is either ALL or nothing.
None of us is the "perfect APer." In fact, I do not even consider myself AP, have never used the term as a label, never once considered cloth diapering, ended up having a c-section and hospital pain medication up the wazoo, lack many MANY other "key AP credentials" ... and yet this is the only parenting forum I belong to. Because I can come here and get very knowledgable advice about whether organic calendula oil is the best thing for m son's eczema. Because I am committed to co-sleeping and gentle discipline and "full-fledged personhood for small people" and because I am *considering* not vaxing and need more info and input about it. Because no one here would have tsk-tsked me out for sticking to my vegetarian diet while pregnant, for leaving my OBGYN in favor of an attempted homebirth.
In short, I might fail, might pass the "AP entrance exam" if there were such a test. But my point is, I don't really see anyone here suggesting that we administer such an exam to keep the "undesirables" out. It's more that we need a forum of our own and, yes, a haven from the overwhelming world of mainstream ideas to discuss the ideas *we* embrace, ideas for the most part given very short shrift outside these webpages. Even if we all embrace slightly different ideas from one another - I think this diversity of thought is important, too!
Most of all, I come here because the people here are smart and funny and committed to a way of life that puts children first (and I DON'T think that has to mean "no time for Mommy, no me-time ever at all"!), that respects children, that is a "thinking woman's" (if you will) approach to raising kids. I come here because these boards are populated by people who live out their consciences, who trust their instincts and are constantly trying to figure out what the best thing to do is so they can do it.
Yeah, people - in isolated incidents - can be judgemental sometimes. I have seen that happen in threads, I have seen people fly off the handle, take offense, get their hackles up ... and attack other posters. But, hey, that happens in real life, too. Because we're not perfect. Because we can't sit across the living room or the park bench from one another and look each other in the eye while we speak. Too bad! I wish we could - I wish that 98% of you on these boards lived just down the street from me so we could have these talks while walking down the street or sharing a drink.
Well, rambling on here despite NAK. Let me just close by adding, Newmommy, that I hope you stick around. I think the groundswell that your OP and especially your updates inspired should convince you that this is a good, well-meaning, loving, thoughtful place to spend time. I'm sorry if you haven't felt welcome. If I, with all my faults and vices, can simply plop down and make myself at home, I don't see why you can't! Please reconsider.