Parents with kids who have 'weird' names. - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

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#91 of 111 Old 05-23-2011, 02:21 PM
 
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My mother allowed me to switch to my middle name at 10 years old because I was teased mercilessly.  My eldest (Johnathan) has chosen to go by several different names in his 8 years. He knows that I will endeavor to call him by any name he chooses. The same goes for all of my children. I name them, but they can decide what they'd like to be called.

The difference I guess is that I make sure my kids know that at an early age. Plus, I choose to surround my family with non-judgmental, loving, accepting people. There is no place in my life for negative people. One of the many reasons I choose to homeschool (not their names, but the negativity)

I am sorry your name caused you pain. Like so many things, what causes one person pain can bring joy to another. Many have expressed that they would have loved to have my first name - go figure!

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#92 of 111 Old 05-23-2011, 09:57 PM
 
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Let's just say that my name was misspelled on my wedding ring and we had to have it re-engraved! irked.gif

 

It's actually a totally common name in my culture (as are my kids names, although they are slightly less common even there), but not in the English-speaking world. DD1 and DD2 both have the ethnic first names - people pause at first, but then usually comment about them being pretty names. Yes, they get misspelled all the time, too. DD1's middle is very common in several cultures (one of the top names in the US now, although it was my grandma's name), so she could eventually go with that if she wanted to, but I highly doubt she will. DD2's middle is more difficult than her first because it sounds like a type of bean in English, so I think she'll definitely stick with her first name! Not bad having options (I have no middle name).We know several people who go by one name in our culture and another name in their dealings with English speakers. I didn't want to have to do that. DH agreed with ethnic names, so we picked ones we liked and thought were pronounceable in English by his family while keeping their original spelling with an easily anglicized pronunciation.

 

Honestly, even though I have to repeat and re-spell my name all the time, I'm glad our names are meaningful to us, and I was not and my kids won't have to be referred to by their last initials because there are 3 kids with the same name in class.


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#93 of 111 Old 05-24-2011, 01:52 AM
 
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He knows that I will endeavor to call him by any name he chooses. The same goes for all of my children. I name them, but they can decide what they'd like to be called.

Slightly OT, but I like this attitude. Neither DH nor I like our first names - they're both fairly common, mine ridiculously so - and call each other by our internet nicks or nicknames derived thereof. A fair few of our friends call us by those names. Both our parents seem faintly disapproving of the practice. :p I don't exactly expect my mother to start calling me Smokering, but I don't feel the need to go by a name I dislike for my entire life just because she chose it for me, either. I've occasionally thought that if I broke all ties and moved to Tahiti, I might start going by my middle name (given that Smokering is problematic for daily life!); but currently it's too much bother.

 

So, while I certainly hope my children will grow up liking their names, I guess I won't really be able to complain if they change them! Hopefully I'll be able to graciously refer to them as whatever they choose.


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#94 of 111 Old 05-24-2011, 04:09 AM
 
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Slightly OT, but I like this attitude. Neither DH nor I like our first names - they're both fairly common, mine ridiculously so - and call each other by our internet nicks or nicknames derived thereof. A fair few of our friends call us by those names. Both our parents seem faintly disapproving of the practice. :p I don't exactly expect my mother to start calling me Smokering, but I don't feel the need to go by a name I dislike for my entire life just because she chose it for me, either. I've occasionally thought that if I broke all ties and moved to Tahiti, I might start going by my middle name (given that Smokering is problematic for daily life!); but currently it's too much bother.


For some reason I've come to hate my given name... it's not the name itself, it's the way it sounds and the feelings it conjures up in me when I hear it applied to ME. So I go exclusively by a nickname... I've been thinking of legally changing my name but I feel like my mom would be CRUSHED. Instead, I just cringe every time someone uses it... that name is NOT me. But anyway, my name was uncommon growing up (much more common now with younger kids though!) and I had to spell it and correct pronunciation a million and one times -- not fun for someone who's very shy!! But I wouldn't have wanted a common name... just something easily pronounceable or weird enough that it wouldn't be confused with a common variation that I can't stand...

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#95 of 111 Old 05-24-2011, 10:22 AM
 
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Weeds is the reason I love the name Silas.  love.gif

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#96 of 111 Old 05-24-2011, 10:48 AM
 
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I had parents who thought I would see an unusual name as a gift. Too bad my classmates didn't appreciate it and teased me horribly, even though they tried to raise me to not care. It got bad enough I changed my name legally when I was 24 and had trouble bring taken seriously when job-hunting. As a 30-year-old, I can see how adults see it as a cool name, but I was teased and taunted so bad that when I hear it, my heart clenches. Unusual names belong in the middle with a normal name first. Your kids won't thank you when they're teens. They're the ones who will have to live with the weird names.


My two elder sisters were given uncommon but simple names; my mother named them. My father named me, and it's a name I was teased about all through school. My TWO middle names weren't good fallbacks either. I changed my name at 18, but my family refuses to even acknowledge it's existence. However, they love to reminisce about how I used to cry and beg them to change my name when I was 6-8.

I've since decided while I want uncommon, special names for my kids I will make sure it's normal enough not to induce schoolyard heckling.

 

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#97 of 111 Old 05-24-2011, 12:14 PM
 
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Weeds is the reason I love the name Silas.  love.gif



me, too!  It wasn't even on my radar until Weeds.  I just wish our last name didn't contain 2 S's - making it sound too sssss-y.

 


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#98 of 111 Old 05-24-2011, 01:29 PM
 
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I think uncommon names are great (I certainly don't want my kids to be one of 3 or 4 with the same name in their grade). A lot of people here have chosen such nice names for their kids!

 

However I personally hate the name my parents chose for me (Heidi). Its a perfectly fine name when I am with English or German speakers, but fully half my family is French and I live in the French part of Canada and my last name is French and it is such a pain to deal with my name with French speakers (also Spanish speakers, Italian spearks, etc) because nobody can pronounce it or spell it. I really really really wish my parents had considered this when they named me. My middle name is also not an option for the opposite reason... Marie is way too common since every second person here has a name that is composed of Marie and hyphenated with something else (among a small group of coworkers I have Marie-Josée, Marie-Claire, Marie-Pierre, and I could go on).

 

So while I think unusual names that are easy to pronouce are great (such as Sage or Silas to take some of the many wonderful examples I saw on this thread), I personally would never give my child a name that is hard to pronounce just because I wouldn't want to put them through what I experienced with my name!

 

Now I have the challenge of coming up with a names that are both uncommon and easy to pronounce in French, English and Italian (DH is Italian) for my future kids... lol... wish me luck!!!!


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#99 of 111 Old 05-24-2011, 02:32 PM
 
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I agree with pp here that no matter what you name your child, whether common or uncommon, there will be resistance and mis-spelling/pronunciation.  But once the baby's here, they will get used to it, I think because you're now associating that name with a cute little baby!

 

Funny story, the kid I used to nanny had a unique name and when he was 2 we were at the park and another little boy asked what his name was and nanny kid told him.  The other little boy started using his name you know "nannykid come here!  look at this nannykid!" (his name isn't nannykid just because I'm not disclosing his real name).  Anyway, the mom who heard it when nanny kid said his name kept telling her kid that she was saying nanny kid's name wrong and that it was actually a super common name.  I had to stop her and say NO that's NOT his name!  Your kid heard it right.  It took me a couple of times saying it for the mom to get it.  BTW, we'd never had any problems anywhere else.

 

Both myself and dd have "normal" names (common enough that people should have encountered them in their lives as they're both traditional names, but there probably won't be another in her class or anything) and if I use my full first name people sound like they're sneezing (which is why I go by a shortened version) and they always emphasize funny vowels in dd's name (in ways that I've NEVER heard her name pronounced).  No matter what people are going to have difficulty with names!


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#100 of 111 Old 05-24-2011, 04:02 PM
 
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Funny story, the kid I used to nanny had a unique name and when he was 2 we were at the park and another little boy asked what his name was and nanny kid told him.  The other little boy started using his name you know "nannykid come here!  look at this nannykid!" (his name isn't nannykid just because I'm not disclosing his real name).  Anyway, the mom who heard it when nanny kid said his name kept telling her kid that she was saying nanny kid's name wrong and that it was actually a super common name.  I had to stop her and say NO that's NOT his name!  Your kid heard it right.  It took me a couple of times saying it for the mom to get it.  BTW, we'd never had any problems anywhere else.


LOL

Totally OT but you just reminded me of this -- we took DS to the zoo recently, some kid referred to him as 'that boy' and his mom whipped around to correct him, "That's not a boy, that's a girl!"... Well actually he IS a boy. lol.gif (She sounded super annoyed so I didn't bother correcting her!)

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#101 of 111 Old 05-25-2011, 05:15 AM
 
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Slightly OT, but I like this attitude. Neither DH nor I like our first names - they're both fairly common, mine ridiculously so - and call each other by our internet nicks or nicknames derived thereof. A fair few of our friends call us by those names. Both our parents seem faintly disapproving of the practice. :p I don't exactly expect my mother to start calling me Smokering, but I don't feel the need to go by a name I dislike for my entire life just because she chose it for me, either. I've occasionally thought that if I broke all ties and moved to Tahiti, I might start going by my middle name (given that Smokering is problematic for daily life!); but currently it's too much bother.


For some reason I've come to hate my given name... it's not the name itself, it's the way it sounds and the feelings it conjures up in me when I hear it applied to ME. So I go exclusively by a nickname... I've been thinking of legally changing my name but I feel like my mom would be CRUSHED. Instead, I just cringe every time someone uses it... that name is NOT me. But anyway, my name was uncommon growing up (much more common now with younger kids though!) and I had to spell it and correct pronunciation a million and one times -- not fun for someone who's very shy!! But I wouldn't have wanted a common name... just something easily pronounceable or weird enough that it wouldn't be confused with a common variation that I can't stand...

I changed my name, too. My parents called me Jennifer and I was born in the early 70s ( that sounds like the start of a 12-step confession, doesn't it?!). This was perfectly fine until we moved to the US when I was a teenager. It felt like I ceased to exist as an individual and became a management problem; Which Jennifer? Jennifer M? Oh, and which Jennifer M?! Jen? Jenny, Jennie or Jenni?. I hated it. So I changed it to Gwen after I played a character by that name in a production. When I discovered that Gwenhwyfar (or Guinever, whatever) means roughly the same thing as Jennifer, it sealed the deal. I've been Gwen for longer than I was ever Jennifer now. I never changed it legally, though I considered it when I got married. It is nice to know that when I answer the phone and hear who they ask for, I can immediately determine if I ought to just hang up....anyone asking for Jennifer undoubtedly wants money. Or wants to discuss money, which is just never any fun.

Maybe this is why I called my son Peregrine? But I also feel that, like all parenting decisions, they are mine to make but theirs to confirm. If my kids change their names, that is fine by me.

Gwen , partner to D ; Mamma to T (6) , J (4) , and baby P
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#102 of 111 Old 05-25-2011, 05:58 AM
 
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I made the mistake of telling my family that I was going to use "family names" albeit likely changed.  One of our top contenders for a girl was to be named after the grandmothers "Carla Isabel".  I didn't realize how excited my mother was hoping to have a granddaughter with her name, thus how disappointed she was when she didn't.  To add insult to injury we ended up nicknaming her Ali (pronounced Allie, but with only one L since her real name has only one L) my mother was mortified we had named her after the boxer (of course we hadn't), then right after she was born Ally McBeal came out on television and suddenly Ally was one of the most common names around so we dropped the nickname it was crazy.

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#103 of 111 Old 05-25-2011, 05:08 PM
 
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I have a "weird" name, so no one questioned our kids names, Isla and Finn, which I don't think are so strange. We didn't really share until they were born, though. FWIW, as an adult, I love having a strange name, and didn't mind it when I was a kid. Just another thing that made me different, and that's a good thing.

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#104 of 111 Old 05-25-2011, 05:17 PM
 
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We didn't tell anyone our name choices until they were born. And they weren't named until we saw them, either. In fact, our third was 12 hours old before we decided. We have gotten a bit of confusion with our kids names but not much flak. They really aren't that different and since my oldest now has a "popular" name though it was 7 years ago when we picked it out. Their names are Adisyn, Gage and Dellan.  Our biggest problems are usually Alison, Gabe and Dillon.  It bugs me, but whatever, people just don't pay attention. Go with your gut, don't worry about people. They won't say much after your baby is born. For whatever reason, people feel they can have a say in what parenting choices you make and I think that's ridiculous. I don't think your name choices are so weird. I wish people didn't judge so much. 


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#105 of 111 Old 05-26-2011, 01:17 PM
 
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my 2nd boys middle name is Cuauhtemoc which really drives people nuts. my side of the family made us say it over and over until they semi pronounced it right lol

 

i love it.

 


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#106 of 111 Old 05-26-2011, 02:42 PM
 
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So, how do you pronounce it? :p


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#107 of 111 Old 05-26-2011, 07:40 PM
 
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So, how do you pronounce it? :p

 

if i had to sound it out i would write quak-them-oke 

 

 

and not "quack" like a duck but quaaaaak. long a. 

and "oke" like "poke" 

 

LOL


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#108 of 111 Old 05-30-2011, 10:13 AM
 
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Casius & Silas aren't weird.  Those are fine.

There was an Indian-looking girl about 10yo being sworn in at my citizenship ceremony.  Her name was something like Twinkletoes. 

That's a little weird...

I badly wanted Raymond for DS2, but DH wouldn't have it.  If you live in Britain it's hard to get more weird & uncool than Raymond. (sigh)


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#109 of 111 Old 05-30-2011, 10:14 AM
 
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And apologies to his mother... but I once met a little Saguaro which made me snirk a bit.  If you grew up in California (his mother had) you can understand why that sounds strange... But I'm sure he'll make it his own.


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#110 of 111 Old 05-30-2011, 10:18 AM
 
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And apologies to his mother... but I once met a little Saguaro which made me snirk a bit.  If you grew up in California (his mother had) you can understand why that sounds strange... But I'm sure he'll make it his own.



I live in California and I actually think its pretty cool to be named after a cactus.

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#111 of 111 Old 05-30-2011, 02:13 PM
 
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I badly wanted Raymond for DS2, but DH wouldn't have it.  If you live in Britain it's hard to get more weird & uncool than Raymond. (sigh)



my second boy's middle name is raymond.  i think it is a fantastic name, we were this close to using it as a first. 

 

also, cassius and silas are also fine names, not weird at all and very good IMO.  we know kids with weird names, those are not even on the edge of the realm of weird.

 

my kids have unusual names.  the first boy's name has never been in the top 1000 in the US, and the second boy's name was 9hundred and somethingth in the late 1800s.  they both have "real" names, just uncommon ones.  we live in an area where this is the norm rather than the exception.

 

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