February 2013 Rockstar Mamas Thread - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 06:27 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Welcome to the Rockstar Mamas thread! Our wonderful group of mamas started following each other in the Charting to Avoid thread over in fertility. Eventually we created "The Whatever Ladies!", a safe place for those of us who were not trying to prevent pregnancy, though not actively trying to conceive either. Spread out over a year, we all got pregnant and had our current babes- several whom are over a year old now!

We made the decision to switch to Rockstar Mamas, after a conversation about how each and every one of us was a Rockstar in some way, for living and thriving through the parenting challenges thrown our way every day. Feel free to join us in our thread, but be warned, the conversation moves fast!

Not really rules but something to consider if you join:

1. Need to be chatty

2. Know that we are all vastly different from one another but we've become friends so we respect those differences. We are vaxers and nonvaxers; homeschoolers, unschoolers, public schoolers; run the gamut from vegan to paleo; some of us want more kids, some don't, and some aren't sure...but we all manage to really get along and come together on things we DO agree on.

3. Aren't afraid to ask each other the hard questions or point out the obvious when/if we want advice!

Member List:

lyeterae ~ Baby boy born February 2011
annie ~ Baby girl born April 7, 2011
Barefootscientist ~ Baby boy born May 30, 2011
AnnieA (due 7/18) ~ Baby girl born July 17, 2011
MarineWife (due 7/30) ~ Baby boy born July 25, 2011
Baby_Cakes (due 8/16) ~ Baby boy born August 16, 2011
MovingMomma (due 8/9) ~ Baby girl born August 18, 2011
akind1 (due 9/28) ~ Baby girl born October 11, 2011
mom2one (due 10/23) ~ Baby boy born October 21, 2011
jeninejessica (due 12/01) ~ Baby girl born November 29, 2011
Kindermama (due 1/6) ~ Baby boy born January 1, 2012
Euromama

akind1 going around again ~ Baby BOY!! due 3/6/2013 but betting on 3/11 or 3/19

January thread: http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1371874/january-2013-rockstar-mamas#post_17225072

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#2 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 07:03 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Kat ~ This one is for you. DH tried to give me a pedicure yesterday. The thing he got for scrubbing my feet didn't work, though, so he just massaged them. Then he actually asked if I wanted to take a bath after dinner! We also had a nice lunch together Friday, which he suggested. Maybe he's beginning to realize that he had been neglecting us.

I reread The 5 Love Languages. My LL is quality time, which makes perfect sense because I complain the most that dh doesn't spend any time with us or pay us any attention. He's always busy. What's funny is that my 2nd LL is acts of service but I don't feel loved when he does things for me. Or maybe the problem is that I don't feel loved when he does things for me in lieu of spending time with me and the kids.

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#3 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 08:04 AM
 
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oh trust me, they are watching plenty of tv!!  

I'm still so sick.  Ugh.  I feel like poop.

 

Dh was going to try to go to Costco today but w/the superbowl today it sounds like a death sentence.

 

hmm...nm else going on here.  i just really need to start feeling better soon!!!  


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#4 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 10:00 AM
 
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Baby_Cakes, do you think it's the flu? That stinks being so sick.

MW, that's so awesome that he's puttingmore effort in to things. I hate it when DH and I are disconnected. The feeling of discord that permeates everything is awful.

AFM, finishing up the nanny job. Ava slept better last night. As soon as she woke up, she started saying "rrrwwwww? Rrrrwwww?" which is her way of asking for the dogs. She really likes them and they actually are doing better with her today. I still have to watch them together because I don't trust the dogs not to snap at her.

My friend that watches Ava texted me this morning that she started bleeding and was at the hospital about to go in to surgery for a D&C. greensad.gif They lost the baby. I feel so bad for her. I think she was 13 or 14 weeks. This feels weird to say but have you ever had a friend tell you they were pregnant and you had a gut feeling or intuition that the pregnancy wasn't going to last? That's happened to me a couple of times and every time I've felt that, I've been right. Kind of creepy.

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#5 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 11:03 AM
 
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Baby_Cakes : I'm sorry you're sick,I hope it passes soon!

 

MW: How nice of your hubyb to give you a pedicure! I can relate with the quality time as well, I'm glad he is trying to spend time with you.

 

Annie: I'm so sorry for your friend :(

 

B is refusing to nap this afternoon, on a day that we have plans in the evening of course. I'm cleaning house and getting ready to celebrate R's 7th birthday tomorrow. When did my kids start growing up?

 

We are NTNP again now in hopes of a sticky baby in the near future. Of course I missed a critical temping day (the thermometer and I had issues that morning) trying to pinpoint ovulation. I wasn't charting when we got pregnant last time and it  was frustrating for me to not be able to pinpoint how far along I was.


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#6 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 11:43 AM
 
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Hugs Lyterae!  Hoping for a sticky bean soon! 

 

Lauri - It's def not the flu, just a rotten cold.  I think the coughing and all is from post nasal drip and the congestion is just epic.  I just have such a headache from it.  That's the worst part, really.  And the no voice.  Hmm.  It all just kind of sucks, really.

I'm sorry about your friend!  Some ppl have a sense about this stuff, like you seem to.  It's odd, but not that odd, I don't think.  I'm believe in that kind of thing.

 

MW - makes total sense to me.  You can't appreciate the service if it's taking away from your quality time. 


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#7 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 12:59 PM
 
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Kat ~ This one is for you. DH tried to give me a pedicure yesterday. The thing he got for scrubbing my feet didn't work, though, so he just massaged them. Then he actually asked if I wanted to take a bath after dinner! We also had a nice lunch together Friday, which he suggested. Maybe he's beginning to realize that he had been neglecting us.

I reread The 5 Love Languages. My LL is quality time, which makes perfect sense because I complain the most that dh doesn't spend any time with us or pay us any attention. He's always busy. What's funny is that my 2nd LL is acts of service but I don't feel loved when he does things for me. Or maybe the problem is that I don't feel loved when he does things for me in lieu of spending time with me and the kids.

That sounds like progress!! Even small steps are good if theyre in the right direction!

 

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oh trust me, they are watching plenty of tv!!  

I'm still so sick.  Ugh.  I feel like poop.

*hugs* Carrie! It's so hard to be sick. That's the only times I actually -miss- pre-baby life. The ability to just tune out life for a bit while I recover. None of that with a dependent baby around!

 

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My friend that watches Ava texted me this morning that she started bleeding and was at the hospital about to go in to surgery for a D&C. greensad.gif They lost the baby. I feel so bad for her. I think she was 13 or 14 weeks. This feels weird to say but have you ever had a friend tell you they were pregnant and you had a gut feeling or intuition that the pregnancy wasn't going to last? That's happened to me a couple of times and every time I've felt that, I've been right. Kind of creepy.

So hard!! :(  I haven't had any sixth sense like that, but I also don't know a lot of people closely irl that have been pregnant, mostly internet friends! I can see how that would be creepy. 

 

 

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We are NTNP again now in hopes of a sticky baby in the near future. Of course I missed a critical temping day (the thermometer and I had issues that morning) trying to pinpoint ovulation. I wasn't charting when we got pregnant last time and it  was frustrating for me to not be able to pinpoint how far along I was.

It -sucks- to miss a day and then realize that it was a really important one!!  WIll think sticky thoughts for you!

 

 

 

 

Just spent the night with Tenley out at my moms house. Was supposed to be a bit of a relaxing "Here's grandma, go play!" Type day, and it wasn't AT ALL. My youngest brother had a basketball tournament, starting at 10am, so we met them there and stay for one game, then went for lunch, and then I thought we were going back to their place in ebtweem but we didn't, we stayed at the school until the second game was over, so we didn't get back to the house until almost 6pm. We originally thought we'd be at the school from maybe 10-12 then go back home, and then go back for a game at 6pm. Instead we were out all day, so I spent the whole time redirecting Tenley, and having to keep her off the court, etc. And my mom wasn't as helpful as I thought she would be. Then back home, we didn't eat until 715, so between 6-7 Ten was cranky because she was hungry and also wanted to sleep. Then she finally ate, and we got ready for bed, but because it wasn't her crib, she wouldn't settle, so she ended up playing until about 9om and then finally fell asleep. She was up every 2 hours or so duringt he night, and then up for good at 730am. Everyone else was still sleeping, so I got her breakfast and we played until 9ish when people finally woke up, and then ate a normal breakfast as a family, cleaned up, and Tenley and I got ready to go. 

 

Blah. So yeah... my mom didn't really take care of her at all, which sounds like me being whiney, but she's always talking about how I should go out there with Ten so I can get a break and take a nap or something, and then can spend some time with her. And then that didn't happen at all, so it was worse than me being home with her, because it's not as babyproofed as our house is. My mom tried, but there's always gonna be things people don't think of, and of course Ten found them. 

 

SOooooo... I'm more tired than before! I'm gonna go shower and then take an hour and lock myself in the bedroom alone and try to veg out a bit. I need it!!


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#8 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 02:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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lyterae ~ I hope you get a sticky bean soon!

Annie ~ I haven't had a sense of that specifically but I have had dreams that turned out to be more like premonitions.

JJ ~ That's how I feel going almost anywhere with Dylan, like when dh wants me to go to one of his work functions. It's supposed to be fun, family time but it's not for me. My dh is usually working so I'm left chasing Dylan around trying to keep him out of everything while also trying to keep and eye on Ethan and Kellen and wrangle them. Not fun at all, really, just exhausting!

My mom is pretty good about helping taking care of the littles. But if I want to actually get a nap, I have to specifically ask.

Carrie ~ We all got colds just before Christmas with coughs that lasted for many weeks. We still have a bit of the lingering cough. Ugh, I wish it would just go away. Have you been taking any immune boosters?

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#9 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 03:30 PM
 
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yes, been taking C and D to boost my immune system, as well as pounding cold calm.  Trying!!!  

 

Finn's eyes look terrible.  Way way worse than Nora's did.  I wasn't even considering going to the dr but now Chris put this bug in my ear that maybe he needs abx drops?  Idk. I've been alternating breast milk and the Similisan drops (which he hates both, so i'm not sure how much is actually getting in there) but he's got crazy amounts of pus coming out of both eyes.  And they are blood red.  He doesn't seem too bothered tho -- maybe it looks worse than it is?  Idk.  I'm nervous.  I don't know what to do.  WWYD?

 

JJ that sounds exhausting!!  Hope you have a better night.  


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#10 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 03:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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When I got that eye infection when I was at my mother's I got abx eye drops first. They didn't do a thing and I tried a couple different ones. The only thing that worked for me was breastmilk. It took several days of putting the milk in my eyes as many times as I could. I think I did it almost every time that Dylan nursed since that's when it was easiest for me to get a few drops. Are you using fresh or stored milk?

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#11 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 03:43 PM
 
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fresh, expressed right from the tap.  And while nursing, I do it every time.  It's only day 2.  I read online it can take 4-5 days to clear?  Am I right about that?


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#12 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 05:36 PM
 
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 onetwoten: How frustrating! I'm sorry that the visit didn't go as planned, I hope you're able to veg out and relax tonight.

 

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yes, been taking C and D to boost my immune system, as well as pounding cold calm.  Trying!!!  

 

Finn's eyes look terrible.  Way way worse than Nora's did.  I wasn't even considering going to the dr but now Chris put this bug in my ear that maybe he needs abx drops?  Idk. I've been alternating breast milk and the Similisan drops (which he hates both, so i'm not sure how much is actually getting in there) but he's got crazy amounts of pus coming out of both eyes.  And they are blood red.  He doesn't seem too bothered tho -- maybe it looks worse than it is?  Idk.  I'm nervous.  I don't know what to do.  WWYD?

 

 

  We started taking elderberry syrup when we were dealing with that awful cold and it seemed to really help kick it. Regarding Finn's eyes I personally would keep doing what you're doing, even with antibiotic drops it still takes days to get better. If he starts complaining that his eyes hurt then I might change my tune, or if you hit day 3 or 4 and they aren't clearing up. Personally I found the abx stung when applied, breastmilk would have been much nicer. I kept a bag of donor milk from when Ben was getting donor milk so I would have it next time somebody ended up with pink eye. 


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#13 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 05:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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fresh, expressed right from the tap.  And while nursing, I do it every time.  It's only day 2.  I read online it can take 4-5 days to clear?  Am I right about that?

Yes, it took several days before I started to feel like my eyes were getting better and probably two weeks before I felt like it was completely gone. Like lyterae said, the abx stung. The breastmilk was just wet.

Did I tell you all I squirted some in my eye a couple of weeks ago when it started to get itchy and then ran into Ryan's room while his girlfriend was there and said I was crying milk? Her reaction was hilarious! She whispered to Ryan, "Is that what I think it is?" She looked very scared. They moved out soon after that. Do you suppose that was part of the push? lol.gif

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#14 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 06:11 PM
 
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I got the abx drops for Ava when her eye was blood red and had lots of goop. It was also visibly swollen. It looked lots better within 24 hrs of the abx drops.

JJ, your weekend sounds like mine. Exhausting. Keeping up with a busy little one in an unfamiliar, non kid friendly environment sucks. I actually turned down an invite to a super bowl party tonight because the idea of micromanaging Ava any more this weekend made me want to cry. So DH went and Ava and I stayed home.

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#15 of 240 Old 02-03-2013, 06:18 PM
 
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Lyterae, I'm so happy someone else can vouch for elderberry syrup! I feel like such a pusher but that stuff is ah-mazing. Seriously. I wish I had known about it sooner.

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Annie, I admit I wasn't sure at first about the elderberry syrup but it's been wonderful! It is so sweet I don't think that the kids would fight me to take it either. 

 

I hope the evening has been calmer, we had two church services today I was so thankful when it was time to put kids to bed and enjoy a quiet house! There is a little girl at church that adores my daughter, but the little girl talks the whole time and drives me crazy. I don't want to parent other children, I almost wish I could say please don't sit right next to us at church! That seems mean though.


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#17 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 04:30 AM
 
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Anyone want to take a guess as to what day I ovulated? FF currently says one day and TCOYF says another, I know that I missed a couple (important) days when charting. We only stopped using protection recently so I don't even know if I should be considered in the TWW.


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#18 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 05:46 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Anyone want to take a guess as to what day I ovulated? FF currently says one day and TCOYF says another, I know that I missed a couple (important) days when charting. We only stopped using protection recently so I don't even know if I should be considered in the TWW.

I wouldn't put it before cd25. What O detector do you have FF set on? If it's on Advanced, try it on Fertility Awareness. That one is usually more conservative.

I don't think I am going to handle things well today. I get very irritable during my lp, a hormonal mess, I guess. Dylan is already driving me crazy. He kept me up tossing and turning and on and off nursing since probably 3:30 am. Then he woke for the day around 7:30. I tried to nurse him back to sleep but all he was doing was switching sides every few seconds. Any time I block him from pinching or twiddling the side he's not nursing on, he wants to switch sides. Then he immediately wants to start twiddling the other side. I told him he couldn't nurse anymore right now so now he's having a fit. I'm tired and my back hurts!

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#19 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 05:59 AM
 
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I wouldn't put it before cd25. What O detector do you have FF set on? If it's on Advanced, try it on Fertility Awareness. That one is usually more conservative.

I don't think I am going to handle things well today. I get very irritable during my lp, a hormonal mess, I guess. Dylan is already driving me crazy. He kept me up tossing and turning and on and off nursing since probably 3:30 am. Then he woke for the day around 7:30. I tried to nurse him back to sleep but all he was doing was switching sides every few seconds. Any time I block him from pinching or twiddling the side he's not nursing on, he wants to switch sides. Then he immediately wants to start twiddling the other side. I told him he couldn't nurse anymore right now so now he's having a fit. I'm tired and my back hurts!

 

 I just checked the detector and it is set to FAM, I was thinking it had to be at least CD25 as well.Thank you for confirming I'm not crazy. :)

 

I'm sorry you had a rough night MW, is it always rough nights and it's just harder during your LP or is this out of the ordinary?


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#20 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 06:32 AM - Thread Starter
 
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 I just checked the detector and it is set to FAM, I was thinking it had to be at least CD25 as well.Thank you for confirming I'm not crazy. smile.gif

I'm sorry you had a rough night MW, is it always rough nights and it's just harder during your LP or is this out of the ordinary?

That's why it's so important to know how to interpret charting data yourself. No matter how good a computer program might be, it is still just a computer program and can't possibly take everything into account every time.

Yes and no to the nights. It used to be like this every night until we switched to using sposies at night. Yesterday, everything got off track, though.

DH took Dylan grocery shopping in the middle of the day. Dylan fell asleep in the car on the way to the store and back so he didn't take a nap at home all day. That made him overly clingy and fussy all day. Then he fell asleep around 7:30 but he wasn't diapered for bed, not only did he have a cloth diaper on but it wasn't stuffed for night time. He became overly squirmy in the middle of the night because of the overly wet diaper. The diaper leaked. I had to get up and change him and then he would not completely settle and go back to sleep.

That's kind of how it used to be at night until we switched to sposies but it didn't start until later in the morning so I usually got more hours of sleep. Even with that, it's always much, much harder for me during my lp. I get extremely irritable and emotional. I am much more quick to get very angry and kind of explode and go on rants. It's really horrible. I spent the weekend feeling like I was constantly complaining to/about and nagging dh. It's like my mouth opens up and stuff just starts spewing out before I can stop it and no matter how much I tell myself to shut it, my mouth has a mind of it's own. Add horrible cramps that wake me up and keep me up at night and having to pop ibuprofen every few hours and it all just sucks. At least I know I definitely Oed, though.

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#21 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 06:38 AM
 
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Cloth at night can be so hard, for the longest time we were just having to wash everything come morning because he had soaked through it all. We're currently using a cotton prefold + a bamboo/cotton flat  and it's been wonderful! His pajamas can fit over his diaper and I don't have to wash his sheets everyday :)


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I don't usually have a problem with our cloth leaking. It only leaked last night because it wasn't a night diaper set up. The problem is that D has been getting irritated by the littlest bit of wetness/urine. His foreskin has been constantly red and swollen, sometimes even cracked and bleeding. We put him in sposies and it looked almost completely healed after just one night. I put him in cloth for the day and all the redness and irritation came back. After 3 days of sposies at night he was completely healed. I don't know if he is extremely sensitive to his own urine or what.

I've tried stripping my diapers but that doesn't seem to help. I use only Charlie's soap, which is supposed to be one of the gentlest, least irritating detergents there is, and always do extra rinses with every wash. I'm going to try Castile soap next time since I already have that in the house.

Ethan has sensitive skin and is circumcised didn't have an issue like this. Kellen is intact and never had an issue with any of it. It doesn't matter what kind of diapering system I use, either. I don't know what to other than switch to sposies.

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#23 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 07:30 AM
 
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Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post

That's kind of how it used to be at night until we switched to sposies but it didn't start until later in the morning so I usually got more hours of sleep. Even with that, it's always much, much harder for me during my lp. I get extremely irritable and emotional. I am much more quick to get very angry and kind of explode and go on rants. It's really horrible. I spent the weekend feeling like I was constantly complaining to/about and nagging dh. It's like my mouth opens up and stuff just starts spewing out before I can stop it and no matter how much I tell myself to shut it, my mouth has a mind of it's own. Add horrible cramps that wake me up and keep me up at night and having to pop ibuprofen every few hours and it all just sucks. At least I know I definitely Oed, though.

 

These are my PMS symptoms to a tee. I'm telling you, carrots!!  It helped me SO MUCH and it can't hurt.  I literally see red and can feel my mouth starting to flap before my brain could even stop it!  It's awful.  It's out of control!  I can't even begin to describe how much it changed just after 2 days of carrot juice. I was a new woman.  I drink it daily now and my moods are so even its redic.

 

I think I'm starting to feel human!!

 

Finn's eyes look slightly better and have less discharge.  He's still acting totally normal, barely bothered.  I'll keep up the bm in his eyes.  Fx'ed it clears up soon!


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#24 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 09:08 AM
 
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Carrots?? Really? I may need to get some also, any idea what is in them that makes such a difference? 


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#25 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 09:12 AM
 
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This is where I first heard about it:  http://mamanatural.com/a-carrot-a-day-keeps-pms-at-bay/

 

Idk how it works but it just does.  I feel amazing.  I make whole juice with about 1 cup of raw carrots and a handful of frozen strawberries in my Blend Tec.  I also usually add greens and protein powder.  


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#26 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 10:16 AM
 
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Very cool Carrie, I'm going to have to look into a juicer/blender type something! 

 

MW: Have you tried topping his diapers with a fleece liner? Most likely you have run the gamut of options, I just love our cloth and can't imagine not being able to use it :(


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I already eat lots of carrots. I eat them alone and in salads and in all kinds of dishes that I make.

Yes, lyterae, I have tried all my different diapers with various different materials. Nothing makes a difference except that PUL seems to make it worse. I am very upset at the prospect of not being able to use my cloth. I refuse to give up.

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lyterae-- I was thinkking the same as MW with day 25 or maybe even later. Hard to tell with the missing ones. 

 

MW-- that sucks about the diapers! When we were having stink issues, DH was at the point where he wanted to just switch to sposies and I was soooo unimpressed by the idea! Made me very sad at the idea of not using cloth anymore!!

 

Had a better day today. Ten actually spent some time playing with me and was in a really good mood. She did skip her afternoon nap and we paid for that, but otherwise it was good! And I got a lot of cleaning up done too! And... DH made cookies last night that are without a doubt the BEST cookies I've ever eaten. We ate almost the entire batch last night. 


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#29 of 240 Old 02-04-2013, 07:05 PM
 
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MW I have heard taking Vitex can help with PMS symptoms.  I believe it is safe while nursing since so many women who are ttc use it.  

 

So, we risked it and went to target today.  I think the days of Finn sitting in the cart while we shop are coming to an end!  He got out a few times and walked holding my hand.  No more leisurely strolls!   It's hard b/c Nora wants to linger and look at things, and he wants to GO!  We'll have to adjust.  It was fun tho.  I love hanging out with these kids!  They are just a barrel of laughs!  

I kept wiping finn's hands and trying to keep him from touching his eyes too much.  Hopefully we didn't spread our germs.  I was just going NUTS being cooped up indoors.  Im finally starting to feel better.  Just still a bit of a cough and my voice is hoarse, and a runny nose.  I think so far my eyes are ok.

 

I need to go dig up 11 points from the kitchen.  'Night ladies!!  See you tmw morning, coffee in hand!!

 

(PS.  I'm not telling school N had pinkeye.  They require a DR NOTE to come back.  FFS.  It's freaking pinkeye.  You can see it or you can't.  smh.  Finn can stay home tmw while I do drop off. NTM her case was so incredibly light -- she only had redness for 2 full days.  I think I'll just play dumb.)


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#30 of 240 Old 02-05-2013, 06:37 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Carrie ~ Do you know how long the virus/bacteria can hang around after symptoms are gone? I'm not afraid of germs but I would be more than a little upset if I found out someone knowlingly sent her child to school with a potentially contagious illness.

WRT diapers, there have been a few times when my diapers have come out of the dryer smelling like poo. I don't know what that's all about. I washed them yesterday with the Castile soap and a little bit of baking soda and they still smelled. I put cloth on D for bed last night and he tossed and turned all night. He doesn't look red or irritate this morning, though.

I'm not in the mood to start taking any new supplements. I'd rather just leave things the way they are for now and see what happens. I don't want to start taking any hormone adjusters before my cycles have even come fully back yet.

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