I was just looking for suggestions of resources for radical activist parents on how we can deconstruct systems of oppression (white supremacy, misogyny, heteronormativity, homophobia and transphobia, classism, etc.) through the way we raise our children. Thanks ahead of time.
Excited, anxious and proud to be pregnant for the first time! My partner and I can't wait to meet the little boy sometime around Sept 20th.
I plan to do these things:
- have frequent talks with my kids about these issues
- demonstrate activism
- stand up for myself and my kids whenever these forces try to oppress us
- books and films on these subjects
- ensure that my kids schools and play areas are diverse
- remove as much nonprogressive influences as possible (sexist/racist adults don't get access to my kids, negative tv and games will be restricted up to a certain age, etc)
- try to instill a sense of duty in my kids to work for a better world
Look for friends who are different than you.
Discuss situations as they arise (for example, we recently had to spend time around someone who is racist, and discussed that).
The Peace Book has some great ideas. I'm having to read it for school right now and I think you would like it.
Midwife (CPM, LDM) and homeschooling mama to:
13yo ds 10yo dd 8yo ds and 6yo ds and 1yo ds
one thing is important to remember.
as much as there are all that outside influence that will descend on our children, if you meet your child's needs and build a respectful family environment where everyone strives to meet everyone's needs (the word is strive, not do) - then the biggest influence is the parent.
my dd is 10. i have learnt so much from her. she has been my most important critic who has pointed out my fallacies and helped me grow into the person that i am today. today as a pretween (yeah she is very much there) while i struggle to figure out how to parent her i see two things. how she always falls back on my parenting philosophy - inspite of advertisement and her peer group - she stands by how i live my life. secondly OMG what i have done to my mother. i love her and respect her so much more now. gosh the very things that dd does that tears my heart out is the same exact thing i did to my mom.
so really mama - i quote you gandhi's 'the change begins with me.' all you have to do is stand tall for your beliefs, live the most ethical life you can. discover how you can be true to who you are. your children will pick up from your actions - not your words. many many things dont need to be taught to our children (many differ on this with me on this though). our children watch us and pick it up.
so live life fully and be true to yourself.
and please, please, please.
take care of yourself the best you can when your sweet baby arrives. our children are just trying to navigate the world. they are not 'hard' or 'difficult' (says the mother of an intense high needs child). if we can maintain our calm and reduce our frustrations (most of the time) we can figure out what to do, how to answer. the moment your needs dont get met - parenting becomes hard and frustrating. dont forget you are a person too - the most important one that your sweet baby needs in their life.
in other words focus now on how to connect with your baby. what you will do - and the rest will follow.
For me it's all about balance and modeling the behaviors I believe in. Making my own decisions that feel right for my family, not based on what others think is right.
Not being afraid to speak up when something is wrong.
Being an active participant and having my child by my side where appropriate.