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Fess up! What do you do that doesn't jive with attachment parenting and/or natural family living?

11K views 125 replies 74 participants last post by  contactmaya 
#1 ·
I think most all of us believe that attachment parenting and natural family living is the best way to live and parent. However, there are certainly things that we disagree about and/or things we do not do for a variety of reasons. I'm the first to admit that I am far from the perfect AP/NFL parent and I think it's safe to assume that no one is 100% attachment parenting and natural family living all of the time. And I think that is okay. So, this thread is for sharing our shortcomings. What do you do that isn't AP/NFL?

I'll go first.

We drive an SUV.

We occasionally go to fast food restaurants.

We eat very little organic food.

We have a chlorinated pool.

I had all my babies in the hospital and I had a couple of pain-medicated births.

I had ultrasounds.

I weaned all my children when they were two, give or take a few months.

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#3 ·
I had ultrasounds in all of my pregnancies.

This baby will be born in a hospital (others were at home, but I'd have to have an illegal home birth here, and I'm not entirely comfortable with that).

Delay/selective vax.

My kids are allowed quite a bit of screen time. Not so much television, but devices/computers.

Not all of my cleaners are green. Some - like laundry and dish detergent - are, but toilet cleaners and shower scrub, no.

My kids are currently attending public schools.
 
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#5 ·
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moonridden View Post

I had ultrasounds in all of my pregnancies.

This baby will be born in a hospital (others were at home, but I'd have to have an illegal home birth here, and I'm not entirely comfortable with that).

Delay/selective vax.

My kids are allowed quite a bit of screen time. Not so much television, but devices/computers.

Not all of my cleaners are green. Some - like laundry and dish detergent - are, but toilet cleaners and shower scrub, no.

My kids are currently attending public schools.
Oh yeah i had so many ultrasounds in my ultra high risk pregnancy as well as pain meds and lots of other meds. during pregnancy and birth

Aside from white vinigar none of my cleaners are green
 
#6 ·
This is good.

Let's see.

She watches T.V., we all do. I like T.V., there I said it. Hate commercials, but like watching some shows, we all do in this little family. (But I also like to have lots of time without the set on, very firm about that.)

We eat a great mix of things and sometimes that includes soda, cookies, chips, candy. Used to be so hardcore, but couldn't keep up with my own self and actually didn't want to, it's in moderation, but more than it used to be which was none.

She has had all rounds of tetanus vax and I don't feel bad about it, might actually get the polio, too.

This about sums it up, but I'd say all in all I am way more laid back about everything than I used to be, I do what I want and don't stress out so much as I used to!
 
#7 ·
Love this post! I feel like sometimes we all need a reminder that what we do is normal even if it's not 100% AP/NFL all the time...

I do soooo much that is AP compared to most of my family & friends and then I sometimes feel like I do so little when I compare to other NFLer's.

We too love our TV here. It's on too much sometimes and then not at all other times. I'm ok with it. My kids could count in Spanish before English, my second could count in Japanese for a while too... TV can't be all that bad
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We allow junk. And probably go to McD's too much. But it's cold here 6-10 months a year and the only indoor playground.

We live a town driven by oil and gas and we travel a lot by car for things/appt.

Our first child was a typical "baby story" birth, our second was the complete opposite. If/when we manage to have a third, there are no midwives here and I don't feel comfortable birthing alone or with a "traditional birth attendant" so it will be hospital again. I'm ok with that
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We public school but skip preschool.

We use store bought toilet paper and paper towel and non green cleaners most of the time, although I do like using vinegar and baking soda.

I prefer the ease of store bought feminine products but like having cloth for back up. Same with diapers.
 
#13 ·
DH and I are movie lovers and we let the boys watch tv a lot. Nothing with commercials, we have DVDs of stuff. I use leappads to keep everyone calm during "quiet time" so I can breathe for a minute. We use sposies at night.

ETA: Oh and we don't allow "unlimited, unrestricted" food. We don't have money to let the kids eat all day and with 3 boys, they would.
 
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#18 ·
I could probably just copy some of the PPs!

DH and I both drive 4WDs. I *love* my Land Rover.

We used some disposable nappies for our first DD but we have used *all* disposables for DD2.

Too much sugar.

Occasional fast food.

Too much TV.

I am cranky and intolerant of normal 3yo behaviours too often.

I am severely limiting my 3yos breastfeeding due to a profound aversion.

No green cleaners here. I even bought a packet of special wipes to clean the glass shower screen
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I don't automatically medicate a fever but i don't hesitate to give neurofen if they are feeling miserable.

Some of those I am working on changing but others I'm good with and have no plans to change.
 
#19 ·
Totally going to add...

My kids are long out of diapers... I still buy cases of Huggies baby wipes. They help me keep my house clean.

We are often a bit too loud when it comes to discipline
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I bake/decorate cakes and I use regular gel icing colors.

I may be back again...
 
#20 ·
Quote:
Originally Posted by delightedbutterfly View Post

I may be back again...
Me too. I certainly didn't mean to suggest that yelling is the ONLY thing I do!
 
#22 ·
I say no a lot, but I don't think that jives against being AP. I see people mistaking permissive parenting for AP quite often.

We watch TV and eat sugar.

We used sposies on occasion.

I had 3 hospital births.

I would have an u/s if I had another baby (I can't) because my last had a missed near-previa that even scared my mw when the placenta came out. The first u/s missed it.

We use Western medicine when needed (abx, etc.).
 
#23 ·
  • Okay, my toddler watched 4 Maisey videos on the computer when I needed to pack up the house
  • When I get triggered emotionally, I sometimes forget to mindfully think. The other day My 2 year old grabbed one of his organic squeezy food pouch to eat but I needed to put his bib on so I said"give it to mama please " as I grabbed it and he started to yell while not letting go(squeezed harder) and I said numerous times"give it to me" and he wouldn't so the whole thing got squeezed all over both of us(blueberry...on my new shirt) all because I was being controlling.
 
#25 ·
My kids are vaccinated.

I think of myself as being permissive with snacks and unhealthy food but I think I'm actually pretty careful with that. They get a bit of garbage here and there but it's small amounts and occasionally. Maybe I'm middle of the road here.

Public school. I love it.

I'm fine with technology. One of my kids has an iPad and the other has a smaller and less expensive tablet. They don't use them constantly, but they can use them as they wish. The older one uses hers as an e-reader so she uses it pretty often as she reads a LOT.

I will keep thinking about this.
 
#26 ·
Quote:
Originally Posted by dauphinette View Post

Oh, yes, disposable wipes of any kind here. Hiney wipes, cleaning wipes, Swiffer wet pads......I use it all. And I tell myself it's because I'm "busy."
One warning on the swiffer wet pads - I got some as a baby present (making cleaning easier) and I did love them until they made my cat sick. She would walk on the floor, clean herself by licking her paws, and get sick. So now I use the swiffer mop thing but I just use rags on made wet it with a less harsh cleaner. (Mother Meyers cleaner.) The pads are awesome for convenience, and cleanliness is important to me and if you need convenience to get there I get it, but watch any pets you have and if they get sick then consider that as a possible source.
 
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