Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: hiding in the bathroom
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Good question. In our family, I do almost all of the baby care, simply because dh is at work and I'm not. When he's home, though, he does a lot of it--this morning he got up with Alec and played while I got to sleep a little longer, changed his diaper a couple times, took a shower with him, etc.
What we've found is that as the kids get older, dads get more interested. Well, interested might not be the right word, but once the kids can *play* the dads get more enthusiastic. Dh plays with our twins (8 years old) MUCH more than I do, mainly because I'm busy with the baby while he's playing with them. They ride bikes together, scooter with him, have water gun fights, play Game Cube, build forts or Legos, build birdhouses, etc. Those are all stuff that I *could* do, but I would do them grudgingly. Meanwhile, he loves to do it and it's great for them to be bonding with their dad without me hovering.
In answer to your question, I think that there *should* be an equal balance, but I doubt that there usually *is* an equal balance at all times. I think that by the time the kids are grown, as long as both parents are putting forth their best efforts, the children will have received an equal balance. But, it's not going to be a 50/50 thing constantly; it fluctuates, just like the rest of life. KWIM?
Homeschooling mom to four kids, ages 18, 18, 10, and 6.