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#31 of 37 Old 06-13-2005, 01:41 PM
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Originally Posted by tug

when i was 27, my non-smoking mother died of lung cancer caused by my father's chain smoking for 25 years
I think this is an important point. If you smoke around your son, then he is already smoking--through you. My heavy-smoking grandmother died last year after 5+ years with severe emphysemia--watching her suffer was both sobering and profoundly frustrating--she had no other medical problems, so the last 10+ years of her life, she probably would have been healthy and mobile, had it not been for the cigarettes. My grandfather died when my mom was 22, of a heart attack. We don't know for sure if it was smoking related--but given that he smoked several packs a day, I wouldn't be surprised. It is terribly painful to my mom that I never got a chance to know him, because (as she says) we are very much alike. I'm very fearful for my own mom. Although she never smoked, both of her parents were 2+ pack-a-day smokers and all their friends smoked. At their weekly card games, my mom says, the smoke was so thick you couldn't even see the faces at the table. I pray that my mom doesn't develop lung cancer as a result of all the second-hand smoke she was subjected to.
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#32 of 37 Old 06-13-2005, 08:05 PM
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Just wanted to say I totally agree with the second hand smoke point. Your son is already exposed to it. It's already making his body sick. He doesn't have to start smoking for that to happen.

My parents didn't smoke when I was growing up. I did smoke a few cigarettes in high school, but nothing serious. My DS's dad's parents smoke a lot. DS's dad does too. Because of all the dangers of second hand smoke I now have a court order saying that ex is not allowed to A) bring DS in a car that someone has been smoking in (including his car because he refuses to stop smoking in it), B) bring DS into a house, any house- including his, that someone has been smoking in, and C) is not allowed to smoke around DS or allow anyone else to smoke around him. Now some may say that is an overreaction but he does not have the power/voice to stand up and say he doesn't want to be around second hand smoke. My job, as his parent, is to keep him healthy. I will not allow someone, anyone, to screw up his chances of having a healthy life. If he wants to smoke when he's an adult and out of my house fine, I won't stop him (strongly discourage it, but not stop him).

Steph, DH Jason (1-1-11), DS Owen (10-3-03) and DS Kai (10-13-11)

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#33 of 37 Old 06-14-2005, 08:38 PM
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has anyone tried this?
Easy way to stop smoking

I'll admit I haven't ever smoked, but I have read the Easy Way to Stop Smoking and it is how my ex stopped.
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#34 of 37 Old 06-14-2005, 08:47 PM
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Both of my parents smoke a pack a day. They have for as long as I can remember. I have never, ever tried a cigarette. My sister smokes. I think she started because she is a people pleaser and a pushover and did whatever her friends told her to do to fit in. I personally find smoking to be disgusting.
Hearing my dad practically hack up a lung every morning as a child/teen I knew that I never wanted to get to that point. I could hear him outside as I waited for the bus at the end of my driveway.
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#35 of 37 Old 06-15-2005, 04:41 PM
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Here's an FYI: Zyban/Wellbutrin is a very different medication than Zoloft. While Wellbutrin and Zoloft are both used for depression, they don't work the same. The each focus on different chemicals in the brain. Zoloft won't help you quit smoking. You can, however, add Wellbutrin daily with Zoloft if you are interested in using it to quit smoking. They can be taken in tandem.
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#36 of 37 Old 06-15-2005, 07:08 PM
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I grew up in a home where my dad smoked daily in front of us. My uncles did too. Mom never did. I hated it. It stunk and I thought it was gross. I also took the anti smoking lessons to heart while in school. I have pulled a Clinton before and held a cigarette, but never inhaled! :LOL

My brother, on the other hand, is a smoker. Mostly a stress smoker, but a smoker non the less. My dad did the whole "don't do this" speech regarding why it wasn't good and my brother also had all the same antismoking lessons I did. One of us started smoking, the other never did.
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#37 of 37 Old 06-16-2005, 10:22 AM
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Originally Posted by famousmockngbrd
My mom, on the other hand, smokes around him all the time. DS idolizes her and it really bums me out that she does this. The other day, he picked up the cap to a marker and held it in his mouth like a cigarette, and said he had a "cigarette butt like Grammy." I mentioned it to her but she still smokes around him. I'm not quite sure what to do about it. Sorry to go off on a tangent - just meant to say that it does have an effect on the kids.

We have the exact same situation. There are two things that break my heart about our situation. First of all, my mom LIVES with us, so dd is exposed continuously to this behavior. My dd, too, has "immitated" yaya with sticks or pencils. The other is that although mom smokes outside, it's all over her and the smell is horrible.

To the OP - I hope you can quit if you want to!! My mom has been smoking for 50 years (she's now 64 and started when she was a young teen) and she talks often that she wished she'd tried to quit when she was younger because she would like to quit now, and can't.
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