spinning children by their arms - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 06:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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ok so my mom saw a picture of my sisters boyfriend swinging my daughter around and around. my mom (as we knew she would be) was upset. but i was just wondering how many of you swing your kids around or know an adult who swings your child around. and has the child's arm ever been dislocated or has the adult lost grip of the child sending the child flying? my mom insists this will happen and i just think that well possible is a little far fetched. opinions?

courtney

ps i will post the picture later

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#2 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 06:28 PM
 
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From http://www.emedicinehealth.com/articles/10123-2.asp

Quote:
Nursemaid elbow occurs after a sudden pulling force is applied to the extended upper arm of the child while the arm is slightly twisted.

[...]

* Some examples of typical situations that can produce the mechanism of force required to cause this injury are these

[...]

# Swinging the child while holding the child by the hands
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#3 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 06:29 PM
 
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I have heard of it happening. Seems like last year or so there was a mamma who had it happen to their dc.

I do it as does dh to all 3 of our children. No, our children have never gotten loose of our gripe nor has the childs arm been dislocated. They love it.

Accidents happen. You just never know when.
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#4 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 06:29 PM
 
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Yes - on the lost grip part.

I can remember spinning a young cousin of mine arond and totally losing my grip on him and watching him going flying. Luckily he had a soft landing, and other than both being scared silly, nobody was hurt (we were in a grassy area, so fairly soft landing).

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#5 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 06:30 PM
 
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When I was a teenager I spun my baby brother (1-2ish) around like that and pulled his arm out of socket. I STILL feel bad about it!!!
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#6 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 06:31 PM
 
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We do not swing our Dd by the arms. I wish I had mentioned this fact to a friend of mine who's Dh used to pick their toddlers up by the arms to swing them over the safety gate. They must have done that dozens, maybe even hundreds of times before it pulled the one boy's elbow out of socket, which was extremely painful and now that elbow pulls out of socket more easily than it should, like when you're just holding hands to cross the street and he pulls away.

The pedi said that the swinging likely slowly lengthened the connecting tendons (or ligaments?) until now he has this chronic problem that took months to show up.

Anyway, my mom never allowed us to swing because the same thing had happened to her sibling's shoulder.
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#7 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 06:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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oh man my mom is always right!!!

i remember being swung around and it was always so fun and my dd can't get enough of it

Courtney and Cree, baby made 3, added one more then there were 4, sakes alive, then we had 5, another in the mix now we have 6!

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#8 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 06:45 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jewelysmommy
oh man my mom is always right!!!

i remember being swung around and it was always so fun and my dd can't get enough of it
You can still hold them under the arms and swing around holding the armpits, but my dad always did this in a place where it wouldn't be a tragedy if we slipped, not that that ever happened.
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#9 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 06:45 PM
 
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nak...

i usually grab ds under his armpits when he wants to swing
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#10 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 07:02 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RubyWild
You can still hold them under the arms and swing around holding the armpits, but my dad always did this in a place where it wouldn't be a tragedy if we slipped, not that that ever happened.
:

My DS loves to spin around like that. He also loves to sit on my lap and spin around in my computer chair. Sometimes he'll even come up and start spinning me around when I'm trying to do something here!
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#11 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 07:24 PM
 
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I think it's totally fine to swing kids by their arms. I used to do it all the time with my cousins... they loved it. I don't like to be so overly paranoid about everything that "might possibly" hurt my DDs. I think I read in the Continuum Concept book, that mothers in all those "3rd world" countries regularly swing their babies by their arms... to pick them up, usually. That's why we sling our babies, right? Because it's so natural, and simple and easy.
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#12 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 07:36 PM
 
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We're swingers.
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#13 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 07:47 PM
 
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my daugher got nursemaids elbow once when i was holding her hand and she tried to jerk away from me. I read once that it's most common in children under the age of 4.

we dont swing her by her arms like others said we try to grab her under her armpits since that happened, it was VERY scary. Her arm was completely limp and she couldn't move it and she was crying bloody murder. I thought it was broken

but we do toss her in the air and flip her over and stuff, she loves it and we're always careful
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#14 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 07:50 PM
 
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Hi, chersolly.
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#15 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 08:04 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FreeThinkinMama
my daugher got nursemaids elbow once when i was holding her hand and she tried to jerk away from me. I read once that it's most common in children under the age of 4.
Yep my ds did this. He has had it happen a couple times. We never swing by the arms, but do under the armpits!
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#16 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 08:08 PM
 
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My BIL did this to one of DH's cousins and dislocated her arm. I admit that I do this with my son because he loves it so much. I have tried to do the under the armpit thing and he says "no mommy, by the hands!"
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#17 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 08:10 PM
 
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On the letting go- We used to do this deliberately to each other. However, we were kids spinning kids so I doubt we were spinning with anywhere near the same force. Didn't anyone else ever play swinging statues? We were never hurt.
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#18 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 08:11 PM
 
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We don't swing our children by the arms either. Just a few weeks ago, my dd's elbow became dislocated when my ds pulled her (very gently--I was watching) by the arm. It took hardly any force and she was in agony.
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#19 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 08:13 PM
 
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Until a baby is old enough to hold on to something and lift their own feet up (hold themselves up on their own). Their shoulders are not developed properly enough to handle such things. I see people helping their babies learn to walk by holding just their hands all of the time. Or picking kids up by their arms. The shoulders aren't ready for that sort of thing and it can be very damaging. Holding on to them under their armpits is perfectly fine, and spinning motions are good for the development of their eqilibrium.

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#20 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 08:28 PM
 
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DH's mother hurt him this way, when he was young. It's one of those stories that she always guiltily tells. She was swinging him by his arms, and pulled one out of the socket. When she took him to the hospital, they seperated mother and child, and asked baby DH some questions alone. "Did your mother hurt you?" *sniff sniff sob* "Yesssss." Yeah, it wasn't good. She was a wreck, lol. She thought they were going to haul her away. But eventually they beleived her version of the story, and she never played that game with him again.

When DD wants to spin, I always pick her up under the armpits. I just don't want to risk hurting her.
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#21 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 08:40 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Nikki~
DH's mother hurt him this way, when he was young. It's one of those stories that she always guiltily tells. She was swinging him by his arms, and pulled one out of the socket. When she took him to the hospital, they seperated mother and child, and asked baby DH some questions alone. "Did your mother hurt you?" *sniff sniff sob* "Yesssss." Yeah, it wasn't good. She was a wreck, lol. She thought they were going to haul her away. But eventually they beleived her version of the story, and she never played that game with him again.

When DD wants to spin, I always pick her up under the armpits. I just don't want to risk hurting her.
OH, how scary. I 100% understand the need to separate for questioning, yet that would have been the most terrifying thing in the world for my Dd and for me to have been separated from each other like that. I never thought of that happening.
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#22 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 08:45 PM
 
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I have always heard that it is not safe for kids under 4, b/c of the dislocating issue, so we do always do under the armpits. After 4 they are supposed to be developed enough to handle it

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#23 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 08:54 PM
 
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I don't anymore.
My friends dd arm did come out of socket when she was spinned around. She is 2, it happened this summmer and she had to wear a cast.
She usually has this thing where one arm dislocates on ocassion and pops back in on its own. It did not this time.
So after that I wont spin anyones kids around.
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#24 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 09:38 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Melaya
Until a baby is old enough to hold on to something and lift their own feet up (hold themselves up on their own). Their shoulders are not developed properly enough to handle such things. I see people helping their babies learn to walk by holding just their hands all of the time. Or picking kids up by their arms. The shoulders aren't ready for that sort of thing and it can be very damaging. Holding on to them under their armpits is perfectly fine, and spinning motions are good for the development of their eqilibrium.
Even longer then that. My daughter was 2 when she had this happen, she was able to hold on to things and lift her own feet up, she was walking on her own, which is why she was trying to run away from me when I was holding her hand.
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#25 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 09:40 PM
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My cousins arm came out of the socket this way.

Kids ask for lots of things they can't have. My kids were told WHY and then I'd spin them holding them near the armpits.
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#26 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 09:48 PM
 
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Absolutely, two of my boys have had "nursemaid's elbow." And once it happens a first time, they're prone to it for years to come.

And it hurts.




We don't swing our children by the arms. At all. And don't allow anybody else to, either.
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#27 of 49 Old 12-17-2005, 11:54 PM
 
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When I was two our neighbor did it to me and dislocated my arm as well. I had to go to the hospital and have X-rays and they wouldn't let my parents stay with me. It is my most traumatic and vivid childhood memory. So, no, I do not swing my kids by their arms.
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#28 of 49 Old 12-18-2005, 12:07 AM
 
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yep. happened to dd2 about 2 weeks ago. i don't know if i was swinging her or we were just pulling in opposite directions. we had been in the toy store and dd1 needed to go potty so we HAD to leave right then. i should have just picked dd2 up, but i was holding her hand and trying to get her to come along and somehow it happened. didn't realize it at first since she was fussing enough about leaving the store. i knew what it was after a bit, though, and i KNEW there was a quick fix for it, but couldn't find it online and it was 4pm on friday so we skedaddled to the dr's office before it turned into a trip to the ER. dr bob fixed her in 30 seconds or less. she loves to be swung under the arms, too.

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#29 of 49 Old 12-18-2005, 12:23 AM
 
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I live with chronic shoulder pain (including dislocations), and have since I was 12. Swinging may have been a contributer, although the pain began years after I was too big to be swung. I also remember that it hurt a lot when I was picked up under the armpit. In fact one of my few childhood memories is the distinctive thought that because it hurt so much to be picked up under the armpit, that I would make a point to always remeber that, and to never do that to a kid when I grew up!

That said, dh swings dd, and carries her (sometimes for quite a distance) by her hands...and she loves it. I always cringe, but I realize that I cannot, never have and never will, control many aspects of her life. I have expressed my discomfort to dh, and he is empathetic, but also sees that dd loves it. And I have to admit that in a pinch I sometimes pick her up by her hands briefly.

I think there can be a balance, as long as we are aware of our actions.
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#30 of 49 Old 12-18-2005, 11:58 AM
 
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Yep. Happened to my brother when he was little. Holding my mom's hand, then dropped to the ground in a temper tantrum. Dislocated his arm. She warned me over and over to be careful with my kids....then.....

Has happened to my DD1 twice. I was being careful, but it still happened. First time with me when I was pregnant with DD2, then the second time she was with a babysitter. Luckily I was home that second time, and we all drove to the hospital. (Babysitter was being a mother's helper.) Both times it popped back into place while we were still in the waiting room at the hospital. Both times DD was 2yo.

I am still very careful about it, and I never swing my kids by the arms. Only if I am holding under their arms. And I never let anyone else do it either.

For those who say it is worrying too much... It only takes one trip to the ER with both of you sobbing. Then you never forget it. I thought they were going to think I was abusing her.
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