Preparing dd for a move - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 02-12-2003, 05:39 PM - Thread Starter
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My husband is a scientist and while he is only a few years into a 5-year postdoc position, he is applying for jobs this year. We may be moving to another state in the fall (or may not.)

I know this is going to be extremely difficult for my dd -- she's very territorial, really likes to have things the way she wants them, really likes routine, etc. I'm trying to figure out how to make this as easy as possible for her.

One of the places we may move is near my parents, so that would be a plus, as we can emphasize that aspect (she loves her grandparents.) But at this point we just don't know.

Should I wait until we know for sure before saying anything? If so, there will possibly be as little as 4 months before finding out for sure and moving. Is there anything more general I can do to prepare her? We may not be going anywhere for another 2+ years, so would bringing it up be pointless-to-counterproductive?

I'm really worried about this, so any advice would be appreciated.

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#2 of 4 Old 02-12-2003, 05:49 PM
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I think you should wait until you have all the facts and details worked out. That way you can answer any of her questions and put her mind at ease. My dd will "chew" on an unknown for days/weeks/months and always imagines the worst. The fewer the "unknowns" the better.
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#3 of 4 Old 02-13-2003, 03:42 AM
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We had to move our dd 3 times from age 1-4, all due to boring,unfortunate circumstances....

I would definitely wait to tell her/talk to her...until you know for sure....

And then, approach it matter of afactly and like it will be a fun adventure! Let her feel/express her feelings, but just don't dwell oon or expect negativity.

We found a few books at the library helpful...2 I can remember are Moving Day by the Berenstain Bears and another one by Mr. Fred Rodgers(as in t.v. fred!)...another one I remember being good also but can't remember title or author...but anyway, do a search at the library and you'll find some gems.

WQe also made a book about each place we lived...another way to help the processing and also makes a good keepsake.

Good luck!!

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#4 of 4 Old 02-13-2003, 12:13 PM - Thread Starter
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Thanks for the book recommendations!

Do you guys think 4 months is enough preparation time, though? If we move this fall, it probably won't be much more than that between when we know for sure and when the moving truck rolls up.

I think I am going to start by getting some books on the subject -- my dd reads a ton and we have already read a few Bearenstain Bears books (school, doctor), and that could help introduce the concept without anything specific. I think I might then organically work in the concept of moving to everyday conversation; "Look at that beautiful new house! [one is being built on our block] Who do you think will move into that house?"

4 months just doesn't feel like enough to me. I want to lay some groundwork.
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