Why Is It Hypocrisy To Have Different Rules For Adults Than Children?? - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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#121 of 125 Old 04-06-2007, 01:17 AM
 
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My DS definitely has different rules than we do, and I have no problem with that. I think that's part of good parenting.

I wouldn't eat french fries in front of him without offering, because I think that's rude, but as I consider them very unhealthy, I don't eat them myself, either. We do not necessarily eat the same things as him, but he is always welcome to a bite of what we're eating.

However, drinks are an entirely different matter. Wine is for grownups, and he knows that. He knows there are drinks he can't have, and is okay with it.

I'd never, ever, ever offer a young child alcohol for the simple reason that it is a complete health hazard to young kids. A child who got into a bottle of wine and drank too much could die or suffer serious injury from alcohol poisoning. I would never want to make it remotely attractive to young children. Kids die from alcohol poisoning. I mean, I wouldn't let him drink dangerous chemicals, either. Why is alcohol different? :

Older teens, fine, but never young kids. I would not want to set up that positive association.
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#122 of 125 Old 04-06-2007, 11:16 AM
 
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Originally Posted by lab View Post
hhhhhoooooo....... I really like this post.


I really liked your first post!


I have a 13 year old son and an 11 year old daughter (and a smaller son who is 9 - but yours is only 4 so I should stop)..

Anyway. I'm going to totally start stalking you on MDC now! Coolness!
: Awww, shucks!

If you follow me around, you'll find that I post heated, lengthy diatribes under the influence of narcotic pain killers. I'm awaiting my second surgery for crippling endometriosis pain, and something about spending so much time stapled to my couch makes me even more opinionated than I am in normal life! Today, I am pondering the verrry important question: is it the couch, the pain, or the narcotics that make me so verbose?

Oh, and I have a 9 year old, too! My SS9 lives with us half of the time.

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#123 of 125 Old 04-06-2007, 05:43 PM
 
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My parents' method was similar to the one Yooper explains. It worked great on me, but not at all on my sister. Later on in life, when I asked my father why he didn't make rules, he said he wanted her to learn to manage herself. I really think it was too bad for my sister that my parents couldn't re-evaluate their technique at some point. They just assumed that if it worked well on me, the technique was great, and it was just that my sister had issues.

Leigh, mama to Rostislav homeborn Aug 9 2007, and Oksana homeborn Feb 24 2011.
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#124 of 125 Old 04-06-2007, 05:47 PM
 
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I really think it was too bad for my sister that my parents couldn't re-evaluate their technique at some point
i think that maybe the most imporant aspect of child-rearing in a nutshell.

to see what wroks with each indivdual child..... and treat them differently as they each need.



Aimee

Aimee + Scott = Theodore Roosevelt (11/05) and 23 months later Charles Abraham (10/07)....praying for a little sister; the search starts May 2014
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#125 of 125 Old 04-07-2007, 09:52 AM
 
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Absolutely.

As I begin my time as a SAHM, my goal is to make choices that stem from awareness and consciousness. I don't want to do things without thinking. I definitely do not want to find myself just reacting to behaviors and circumstances. I want to evaluate and, keeping an eye on the goal, determine a decent course of action. I don't think my parents were very thoughtful parents. They just did without thinking, and looking back I feel like my sister's needs were neglected because they were simply unaware that she was not being satisfied.

Leigh, mama to Rostislav homeborn Aug 9 2007, and Oksana homeborn Feb 24 2011.
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