And he told me his Teacher slapped his arm twice, and then calmly I said what did you do (he looked down and said I told her she's not allowed to hit me), and then I asked what the teacher said apparantly she told him he isn't allowed to say that either and put him in time out.
I have no idea what happend to cause the woman to slap my child but my son says he was playing with something sharp.
Mind you he's only been in this Daycare 3 days. I just recently went back to work full time, and had worked at this daycare previously in the past. I feel comfortable with the facility, but DO NOT WANT THIS TEACHER GETTING AWAY WITH THIS. What do I do? How would you address the issue.
I am planning on going to the director and demanding this be taken care of immediatley in a non threatening way. I do not want her around him un supervised.
Am I overreacting? I sure hope this isn't allowed and the Director doesn't blow it off!
Thank you for your time
And good for your ds for standing up for himself! It stinks that he was put in that position but he certainly seems to have handled it well!
Sorry for getting so upset, but these daycare workers are there to help your children, not slap them around.
I am sorry this happened, I can only imagine what you are feeling.
mom to dd-99, dd-01, dd-born still@40w 7/04, ds-05, dd-08, dd-10, dd-13
love and light
One might think a warning was in order and than to wait to see if things improve but my personal oppinion, If it were MY dd, we'd be gone because that lady needs a re-education, Her whole concept of relating with children is flawed, unfortunately it's more common than not probably.
Just teaching her that hitting children is not going to fix the problem. The way she thinks about children is wrong and it would take a lot to change it. Even if she were to quit hitting she would probably resort to some other innappropriate method.
I would call for a meeting immediately for you, the director and the teacher.
I would look for another place for my child. There are plenty of places for your child that are wonderful.
|Originally posted by Justice2
Oh girl. No way would anyone slap my child (hell, I don't even slap my children). I am a very hotheaded person and that daycare lady would not only loose her job, but wouldn't be working with children EVER again.
Yes, OK, that was not very constructive and absolutely not behaviour I'd want to model for my children, but stuff like this makes me REALLY mad! So sorry this happened to you and your little boy, mama. But I am so impressed that he's so assertive - right on!
Let us know how it goes.
|Originally posted by Jeffiner
I'd just like to add that once I got through with her, she wouldn't be WALKING again either.
Yes, OK, that was not very constructive and absolutely not behaviour I'd want to model for my children, but stuff like this makes me REALLY mad!
I am sorry. Normally I do not condone violence. These are our children and if we don't take up for them, who will? This lady had absolutely NO RIGHT to touch your child whatsoever. It's great that your little boy knows that noone is allowed to slap him! Good job mama for instilling that into your child! Go go put the fear of mama in that woman!
Can you gives us and update? What did you do?
ITA with everyone else here that no way in he** would anyone get away with hitting my ds.......
UGH..the nerve of some adults!!!!!!!!
Free To Be~
"Living is learning and when kids are living fully and energetically and happily they are learning a lot, even if we don't always know what it is."
You also need to demonstrate to DS that there are consequences for this type of behavior and that his complaints are taken seriously (that he was not only right in reporting it to you, but that something will happen if he comes forward). Demonstrate your outrage to confirm to DS that it *was* outrageous and he will definately say again "you can't hit me/touch me there/etc..." when/if he is in that same situation again!
Good luck & Good job raising a child who *knows* that his body is his own!!!
All of your suggestions and support has helped!!
I'm so sorry this happened...
Parent you have the POWER, don't let them intimidate you
I would never put my daughter back in the room with her or she would learn not to trust me.
I wouldn't move him out of daycare unless you don't feel comfortable.
Talk again with the director.
I say this as I've seen teachers accused of all sorts of things, which were just not true. I"m not saying that your child is lying, but that there can be all shades of grey - eg if a child is doing something dangerous and the adult taps him on the arm, or if he isn't turning to listen.
'Tap' could mean all sorts of things. I often tap my dd on the shoulder - but I'd never hit her, not in a million years!
I'm just saying that I'd check it out calmly before jumping to conclusions. Indeed, if she did hit a child, she should be fired, but only after an investigation. Otherwise just about every teacher in the land would be out of work!
T: I once carried a very difficult child out of an assembly, because she was screaming and hitting the children around her. She hit me, kicked me, and tried to bite me as I carried her, as gently as I could, but a tantruming seven year old can be difficult to carry! This was in front of about 500 students and 25 adults. She went home and told her mother I'd hurt her and that she'd been doing nothing wrong. The mother to this day believes her, above the 525 people who witnessed the incident.: :
Now my situation is different because of my close relationship with this caregiver but I still think anyone in the child care profession should know to take a child's story very seriously and not just brush it off. If it is a difference of perception than the teacher still must apologise and tell the child they will endeavour to not over step the child's boundaries again. But really the telling thing here is that she put him in time out for speaking up. That's enough reason right there for me to leave this daycare.
I am not saying she is innocent. But I can see how i could be totally innocent too. She taps his hand, (he said he had a sharp object, she may have even paniced a little and tapped harder than nessecary but still not intentionally hitting him) he says "hey you aren't allowed to hit me" because any sort of physical reprimand is new to him, she precieves it as just sassy and him avoiding the instruction he was given, and sends him to time out. Never relizing that he actually thought she was hitting him.
of course she may have slapped him, which led your son to gently remind her that we don't hit, and she could have been insulted at being rightly corrected by a four year old and sent him to time out. in which case she has no bussness ever taking care of children again.
definitely get boith sdides of the story before you report her though.
The truest answer to violence is love. The truest answer to death is life. The only prevention for violence is for the heart to have no violence within it. We cannot prevent evil through any system devised by mankind. But we can grapple with evil and defeat it, but only with love—real love.