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#121 of 221 Old 11-10-2007, 07:43 PM
 
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One thing that always bugs me about these threads. The question was "what would you do if you had sextuplets?"
Not, would you keep the sextuplets or would you reduce? Not, would you do IVF or IUI?
The question was what would you do if you DID have them. I've just never understood why the actual question at hand can't be answered. If you'd reduce, then obviously you wouldn't HAVE them, thus the question is irrelevent.

I think the IVF/infertility bashing on this thread is just awful, whether or not it was intended.

:
THANK YOU!!!!!! I know!!!!!! I thought it was going to be a fun thread about *HOW* would you try to care for that many kids at once. My goodness!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Didn't the OP even say something about what kinds of AP things would you do or not be able to do?
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#122 of 221 Old 11-10-2007, 07:59 PM
 
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if I had them, I would do whatever worked for our familys needs, even if that ment formula feeding, cribs and schedules. I would do it in a heartbeat if my singleton child needed it, so with 6, I would definatly do it.
Yep. I believe it's virtually impossible to plan how I would parent sextuplets, I would do anything that allowed me to survive with sextuplets. Not only are there 6 babies to take care of but a strong possibility of health issues with some because of prematurity, I have no qualms about doing almost anything that would allow us to get through each day. I had one very ill baby for months, your best laid plans get thrown out the window, and you go into survival mode, anything that gets us through this minute, hour, day... It was the worst time of my life, and months later I am still picking up the pieces of my life. I know too much now to ever say what I would do, because you truly have no idea what you will do when it is reality.

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#123 of 221 Old 11-10-2007, 08:02 PM
 
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I'll answer the ACTUAL question!

I would breastfeed as much as possible. I would probably have a rotation, making sure they each got the same amount of breastmilk. I would supplement with formula (hopefully organic). I would probably do some form of co-sleeping - I can't imagine sleeping with six infants and trying to nurse them all on demand thoughout the night. The same with slinging them - all on some sort of rotating schedule.

I would definitely schedule naps and meals. I cannot imagine the chaos of sporadic feeding and sleeping with that many LOs! We would eat as much organic food as our budget allowed.

If we had an extra washer and dryer for diapers I would try to cloth diaper, but the thought of the amount of laundry makes my head spin!

I would simply do the best I could and I have to admit that I would probably choose convenience if it meant saving my sanity!
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#124 of 221 Old 11-10-2007, 08:57 PM
 
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After checking out costs online, I'd get an au pair. About the same cost as a nanny, but they live with you (and are cheaper than a live-in nanny). We already have a big enough house, thank goodness. And like homeschoolmama, I'd get another washer and dryer (hopefully sponsored by some company).

And I would sure as heck pimp us out to any company willing to help with the cost of feeding that many kids.

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#125 of 221 Old 11-10-2007, 08:59 PM
 
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And I would sure as heck pimp us out to any company willing to help with the cost of feeding that many kids.
corprate sponsership and tv apperances and dontations can be your freind whatever it takes to survive! if they wanna offer me the stuff or money, why not?
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#126 of 221 Old 11-10-2007, 09:30 PM
 
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And I would sure as heck pimp us out to any company willing to help with the cost of feeding that many kids.
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#127 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 02:33 AM
 
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Having twins and knowing the limitations I had there, basically whatever it took to keep us all happy and healthy.
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#128 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 11:38 AM
 
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And I would sure as heck pimp us out to any company willing to help with the cost of feeding that many kids.
And there's the best idea yet!

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#129 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 04:39 PM
 
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And if you got one of those kid harness things (like they sell in school catalogs), and a pair of roller skates, you'd never have to walk uphill again!
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oh and id have a placenta dinner party because i cant eat that much placenta...


If I had sextuplets I would have to be woken from my catatonic state. My mind would just shut down.

I would make sure that all of them got some bm, but I know I couldn't ebf.
I would have them sleep together in my room so I could get to them quickly.
I would hold them as much as possible, rotating them through a sling.
I would have to hire help, at least with cooking and cleaning.
I would cloth diaper because I like it and the thought of the mountain of disposibles makes me cry.
I would schedule meals when they were older.

I think I would be numb until they were potty trained and sleeping through the night. I can't even imagine how difficult HOM are. I have two that are 5 yrs apart and I still have to just close my eyes, hold my breath and hang on for the ride a lot.:

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#130 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 06:13 PM
 
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If I had sextuplets I think I would run away from home. I wish I were kidding, but I'm not, really. I can't even imagine being a remotely sane or contented parent to six babies at once.
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#131 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 06:52 PM
 
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I'd do what I did with one -- follow his cues as much as possible, trust in my instinct, prioritize attachment, and suffer from sleeplessness.

What exactly would that look like? I don't know. Would I attempt to get breastmilk into all of them or save it for the sickest? Would I wear them alternatively to be "fair" or choose who was the neediest? Until I know the specific six children, their health needs and the personalities I can't answer that question.

One thing I know I'd do is invite others to help, whether through donations, or by coming over to hold little ones.
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#132 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 10:07 PM
 
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so im thinking... you could totally have sextuplets vaginally right?
what are the birth options there?
at what week would out of hospital birth be an option?

gee i guess i would be that crazy woman on that website who fought to ubac her sextuplets

oh and.... where would you buy your clothes? would a 5'3 woman even be able to walk around at the end?
i would definitely have a section if i had 4 or more babies!!!! and i am of the opinion that low/moderate risk women should/can deliver OOH ( i had both mine at home) but i would be camping out at the hospy if i had sextuplets. however, if they were born healthy and fine i would refuse any and all interventions and i would not let them out of my sight until i got home.

once we were home. . .. . i dont know what i would do. i would probably "adopt" 4 of them out (in pairs) to my mom, sisters, SIL and/or MIL.

i would certainly not try to do it alone. i dont think that would be fair to the kids. babies need individual care. there is no way me and dp could provide that to 6 kids, plus the 2 we already have.

if i couldnt stand (emotionally) to give them to family members, i would need live in help, preferable 2 or more dedicated adults. i would nurse of course, but the reality is they would all be getting at least half formula, if not more.

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#133 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 10:21 PM
 
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And try to find an OB/GYN who would continue having me as a patient knowing I would birth vaginally, even if any of the babies were breech or came early. No way would I consent to routine surgery. Worst coming to worst, and not having a care provider willing to take me on, I'd exercise my rights under EMTALA and birth vaginally anyway, with whatever care provider happened to be in the hospital at the time.
<snip>

Birth: The usual plans would apply, minus the UC if the birth was premature, and minus the lotus birth if the hospital were involved. If NICU stays were needed... - that would be truly awful.
i can't let this go without commenting. a sextuplet birth is super high risk. there is an extremely high probability of complications, even at term. i am talking major complications. our bodies are not designed to give birth to 6 kids at once.

also, premature breech babies are at a way higher risk of head entrapment than term breech babies, because their heads are so much bigger in relation to their body.


i am 300% in favor of HB (i've had 2 of them), but i feel it is important to realize that there are limits to the safety of HB, and that hospitals and c/s really do have their place.

i hope i don't sound snotty or b!tchy, i don't mean to. :

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#134 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 10:31 PM
 
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If I had sextuplets I think I would run away from home. I wish I were kidding, but I'm not, really. I can't even imagine being a remotely sane or contented parent to six babies at once.
Me too. I don't think I'd be a good parent to 6 healthy babies let alone if any of them had health issues. Just the sleep deprivation alone would do me in.

If I didn't run away, I'd very seriously consider adopting most of them out.
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#135 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 11:01 PM
 
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Things like the sleep deprivation are short term problems though. And I'd be willing to engage in some "sleep training" close to a year if they weren't all sleeping through the night yet (sorry). Maybe it's because I'm young, but I can deal with a year of sh*tty sleep.

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#136 of 221 Old 11-11-2007, 11:57 PM
 
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Things like the sleep deprivation are short term problems though. And I'd be willing to engage in some "sleep training" close to a year if they weren't all sleeping through the night yet (sorry). Maybe it's because I'm young, but I can deal with a year of sh*tty sleep.
I'm younger too, and I could live through it, but I would not be any sort of a decent parent or spouse in the meantime.
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#137 of 221 Old 11-12-2007, 11:44 AM
 
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What would I do? Go a little bit nuts. But, I would deal and be happy. I am sure the first year I would probably forget my own name though.
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#138 of 221 Old 11-12-2007, 03:47 PM
 
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If I didn't run away, I'd very seriously consider adopting most of them out.
Me, too. Two would be my limit, period.
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#139 of 221 Old 11-12-2007, 08:07 PM
 
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I'd pump like a fool while they were in the hospital, but then rely on donated milk and formula.

There's no way I'd even consider cloth diapering unless we were gifted regular visits from a diaper service. All that time spent doing laundry I could spend with my kids.

I'd have to sleep train. Not only for my own sanity, but theirs. My singleton wakes up 3-4x a night. If there were 6 babies waking up that many times a night, it wouldn't be healthy for anyone involved as it just wouldn't be possible to get to everybody. There would be less crying if they were sleep trained than if not. I'd hope to god that something other than CIO would work, but if not I'd probably resort to CIO in the most loving way possible. Again, it would be for their benefit and only if it would result in less overall crying.

Dh does the cooking so I'd have him make huge batches of everything on his days off and freeze. Hopefully we'd be gifted (another) deep freezer or two.

I'd schedule feedings. If everyone fed on demand, I'd never do anything else, so in order to spend the max amount of time with them, I'd schedule.

I'd make a rule that there were to be absolutely no visitors unless they either 1. Brought food or 2. Cleaned something.

I'd still GD, not spank, limit yelling.

I'd make at least one large room in the house 100% baby proofed and spend most of our time in there, letting them do what babies and toddlers do.

I'd scrimp and save to hire a nanny or aupair for as often as I could.

Just curious, for those that said they'd selectively reduce, how many would you reduce/abort/whatever the proper name is for it?
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#140 of 221 Old 11-12-2007, 11:06 PM
 
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After having twins and knowing how exhausting it is, I cannot even imagine what I would do with 6 babies. I think it is a little arrogant for me to even assume to know how I would handle it, but I will give it a go!

My main priority would be to breastfeed as much as possible. Obviously, supplementing would be necessary but I would want the babies to get as much breastmilk as possible for as long as possible.

I would prefer to cloth diaper, but it would be nowhere near a priorty.

I would prefer to co-sleep, but not at the expense of my sanity. Ideally I would have nightime help so the babies would need to cry as little as possible. I know how frantic I got trying to meet the needs of 2 crying newborn twins in the middle of the night-what would I do with 6? :

I would try to alternate wearing all the babies a little and ideally anyone who came to help would be willing to wear them as well.

Basically my first priority would be to breastfeed them and then go from there. I just thank God I will never have that many babies at once!

Oh, and I homebirthed twins, but I would not fight to birth sextuplets naturally. I would prefer to give it a try, even if only one could be born vaginally and the others came by c-section. But I defenitely would not demand a vaginal birth. I believe that if our bodies can conceive babies naturally, we can birth them naturally, even 3 or 4. But no one conceives 6 naturally, so it would be foolish to think our bodies are fully capable of birthing them without complications.

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#141 of 221 Old 11-12-2007, 11:39 PM
 
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okay so ive been thinking about this and i think i could totally wear sextuplet newborns... im thinking... first you put on a ring sling or pouch...not putting in babies... then swaddle three of the babies... youd need help for this step...
with the three babies tightly swaddled in thier blankets have helpers hold them on your back while you put on a wide blanket podegi in the traditional torso carry... you should know how to do this one beforehand... adjust as needed and then situate the pouch or rs...im thinking a rs would work better... stack in the babies froggy and upright in a modified tummy to tummy position. tighten rs and go!

im thinking a wrap or sarong tied around the whole thing would help with any weight issues...

im really tempted to borrow some newborns and try this now

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#142 of 221 Old 11-13-2007, 12:06 AM
 
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Gosh, some of the things in this thread are pretty mean, especially since we are all MDC friends with at least 2 triplet moms on here. Some of the stuff said could certainly apply to them as well - more than twins, etc.

I think I would be terrified if I found out I was pregnant with 6 babies. That would bring up a lot of my fears, like prematurity, disability, the loss of my attractiveness, the inability to parent well, the loss of my previous life with my dh, financial fears, etc. And all that in one neat tidy package!

I think I'd start with the financials - medical care, etc. I might want to start a volunteer list for people to help out, I think I'd childproof everything I could. Perhaps a storage unit for all those things I don't really need?

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#143 of 221 Old 11-13-2007, 12:53 AM
 
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You'd still be attractive, Apricot.

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#144 of 221 Old 11-13-2007, 01:07 AM
 
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You'd still be attractive, Apricot.
I'd make sure to put a fresh coat of paint on the wheelbarrow that would hold up my belly.

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#145 of 221 Old 11-13-2007, 01:32 AM
 
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I think screaming tantrums are kind of cute. And if you got one of those kid harness things (like they sell in school catalogs), and a pair of roller skates, you'd never have to walk uphill again! And the sibling-enhanced childproofing testing team would be like having the Cirque du Soleil in your own living room. If two kids can boost each other over the gate, think what 6 could accomplish! You could be extremely popular on YouTube.
:::


I like your style of parenting.

I'd be more . But I think anything that can/should be done with one can/should be done with 2, or 6, or 43. You just might have to prioritize more. So, do everything as much as you can, and fill in the gaps just to get by. Of course I would PLAN to breastfeed, and try cosleeping, but wherever everyone gets the most sleep and the best fed is how things would happen.

PS - I am actually naturally inclined towards multiples (I have multiple ripening of eggs every month, and one or two twin splits would make it sextuplets) and I really don't think I could selectively reduce. Ever.
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#146 of 221 Old 11-15-2007, 04:34 PM
 
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Just for the record, it's not IVF that produces sextuplets. IVF transfers back 2-3 embryos the vast majority of the time (occasionally four in an "older" woman with many failures.) Never six.

Injectables + IUI gives you sextuplets, if poorly monitored.
That was my thought... If you are doing injectables and IUI they are supposed to cancel if you have more than three eggs.

My second son is an IVF baby. We had two embryos, transferred both, but only one implanted.

Honestly, I can't imagine what I would do, mostly because I could never be so irresponsible with fertility treatments to end up with such a high order multiple.

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#147 of 221 Old 11-15-2007, 04:47 PM
 
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I would selectively reduce to twins. If that wasn't an option, I would probably shift into survival mode. I would hire or recruit as many helpers as possible and turn our basement into a big bedroom with futons on the floor. I would try to give each sextuplet one or two sessions of nursing a day, and pump between times as much as I could.
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#148 of 221 Old 11-15-2007, 08:59 PM
 
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I would never do fertility treatments, but *if* I was someone who did, I would just accept my fate, as the Gosselins did and do the best I could every day. I *LOVE* watching that show, btw, and think they are doing a great job given their situation.
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#149 of 221 Old 11-16-2007, 02:24 PM
 
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I'd be more . But I think anything that can/should be done with one can/should be done with 2, or 6, or 43. You just might have to prioritize more.
You may believe that but the reality is for many, it just isn't possible. One child vs two or more is vastly different. It's a helluva lot harder too.

I'm a twin mom. I'm AP, co-sleeping, baby wearing, nonvaxing, etc... All the things I did with my singletons went out the window with twins.

I put them on the same feeding schedule from birth. If one nursed, I put the other to the breast as well. I taught them to eat at the same time.

I planned on co-sleeping in bed with dh and the twins. I could not figure out how to nurse them both in my bed, prop all the pillows, not wake up dh who has to be up for work at 4:30. So I ended up sleeping upstairs on the couch - recliners on each end - with the twins for about 14 months.

I planned on wearing both babies. My stepmom bought me a lovely twin carrier that I'd researched and wanted. I couldn't even figure out how to put it on so I never used it. I couldn't sling as I didn't have any and no money to buy any.

I had never used bouncy chairs or saucers or baby Einstein. I did with the twins so that I could cook dinner and shower.

Things were very different for me in terms of parenting. My twins fussed/cried more than my other kids simply because there was not enough of me to go around.

I started solids early so that they'd go a bit longer between night feeds so I could get more than 2.5 - 3 hours of sleep a night.

I had little to no help. I had a baby with colic. My dh works rotating shifts day or night and is gone for nearly 15 hours on a work day. I had 4 other kids to take care of.

All the kids were in weekly therapy appointments to help them deal with their sister's suicide only 8 months before the twins were born.

I did the best I could.

Even without all those stressful things, doing for multiples what you would do with one isn't very realistic. Mom is only capable of so much. She has to eat, shower, sleep, take care of herself too or else there won't be much left of mom and she will be worthless to her family and herself. You can't run off of idealism.

It's easy to say what you think you would do in any given situation, but until you are there, in the trenches, you just don't know.

:
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#150 of 221 Old 11-18-2007, 02:04 AM
 
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Dragonfly, thanks for weighing in. I was hoping a twin mum would come and contribute.

I've only looked after other people's twins, but it was enough to show me that as you said, almost everything you can do with one goes out the window with two. And you have two breasts and two arms. I cannot see how you could physically and logistically co-sleep with six newborns without someone getting smothered when you try and figure out who just cried out at three AM.

And as for a homebirth with sextuplets - do you think the hospital would call for an injunction as you disconnected the terbutaline pump and all the monitors and attempted to go home when it was clear labour was going to not be stopped today? And then calling the ambulances to transport the six babies beck to the NICU?
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