This is a mix between a vent; needing to get my feelings out; and a bit of a need for some compassion/support.
Edited to add: To clarify- I'm not posting this to get advice on how ds's father should parent. This was posted to get my feelings out and to get some hugs.
My son loves music. He's had a passion for music from the very beginning. He's expressed a love of violins and piano's since he was a toddler.
For years, ds's father (we are not partners) has been promising to get him lessons and an instrument for his 5th birthday.
Ds has been getting SO excited as the time draws near (his birthday is in December).
My son finally decided on piano lessons and we got some suggestions on what kind of digital keyboard to buy (for daily home practice). It can't be a cheapy one but it is possible to find a good one (full size, weighted keys) for around $299. (even though the teachers were strongly suggesting ones that cost $600-700).
So, we had a couple picked out from the Guitar Center.
My son's father suddenly tells ds that he won't be buying him a keyboard/piano and lessons.
Ds is heartbroken. I'm not talking about a spoiled kid ticked off because he can't get the toy he wants. I'm talking about the deep sadness that instantly appeared in ds's eyes. His eyes started watering as he was trying not to cry. Ds quietly came over to me and just held on to me while he cried.
My son is on the autism spectrum. Music is something that brings him out of his shell.
I'm so incredibly sad for my sweet boy. He's crushed...and I can't make it better. I found out that a local music school has financial aid and I even told that to ds's father but he doesn't care.
I know that there are more important things in the world. But my son doesn't know that. This is
Thanks for reading. I just needed to get my feelings out. (this all just happened a couple of hours ago so it's very fresh in my heart).