Do you have 3 or more, with two who have birthdays close together? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 04:22 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have two sons, born in Jan and Aug. We have been ttc for five months now. If I get pregnant this month, I will be due with in a week of ds2's birthday in Aug. I feel like it wouldn't be fair to ds2 or future ds to have birthdays so close together. I also have this opportunity to get pregnant again (like tonight or tomorrow) and I don't want to waste it. What is your experience with kids who have birthdays near the same date? Are you able to separate the celebrations? Do they feel cheated, since another child gets a birthday month all to himself?

Marie-Mom to two boys and a girl.
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#2 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 04:29 PM
 
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I wouldn't let the fear of shared birthdays interfere with the chance to grow your family.

Ruth, single mommy to Leah, 19, Hannah, 18, and Jack, 12
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#3 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 04:34 PM
 
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We just call it birthday season and enjoy it.

You don’t owe them an explanation, just a response.
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#4 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 04:40 PM
 
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I have 2 sons w/ birthdays 5 days apart and my bday is in the same month. When we were thinking about #3 I did NOT want another March baby but once that baby fever hit I didn't care. We've only dealt w/ 1 bday, but they get to pick what's for dinner/dessert on their bday (when they can talk) and we have extended family over for a joint party.

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#5 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 04:41 PM
 
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dh's bday is Sep 6, ds3's is the 10th, and ds2's is the 16th.
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#6 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 05:00 PM
 
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My DS was due on DD1's birthday. Luckily he came 4 days early so that they have their own birthdays. They've never said anything about it bothering them that their birthdays are so close. Parties can be a little challenging since their birthdays are often the same week as Easter. We try to arrange it so that DS has his party the week before his birthday and DD the week after.

My brothers' birthdays are May 21, May 27, and June 19. Mine is June 7. We always called it birthday season at our house too. I do remember feeling a little jealous of my sister whose birthday was in February--it always seemed like she got better presents. I think my mom was sick of birthdays by June.

Honestly, I don't think it's anything to worry about..

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#7 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 05:11 PM
 
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Sorry, I hit send when I was called away. It honestly hasn't been a big deal. We don't do big parties, though. I don't think it would be that big of a deal even thn.
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#8 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 05:34 PM
 
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Well here's my story on that. We already had a son born in January and a daughter born in November. We decided to try for a third and decided not to try in April because then our children would both be born in January. So we tried in May, figuring it would take months to conceive. Nope, we conceived the first try. And then she was born a month early! So my son's birthday is January 18 and my DD2's birthday is January 22. Yep, FOUR days apart. The lesson learned from this experience - you just can't plan these things. Go ahead and do your baby dance. A child is a blessing no matter when they arrive.

Shawna, married to Michael, mommy to Elijah 1/18/01, Olivia 11/9/02, and Eliana 1/22/06
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#9 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 05:37 PM
 
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My dd and ds have b-days about 3 weeks apart. This baby will probably be born right in between then! We planned it this way, so obviously we are happy with it We still plan on giving the kids their own special birthday dinner, but if they want we can do group birthday parties. We aren't super into big birthday celebrations though!

~Rebecca~
mama to a sweet girl , & 4 silly boys

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#10 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 06:00 PM
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My 6yo and my 10month old were both born January 23. Since the 6yo had a twin that died when they were 3 months old, I actually had 3 kids born on the same day. My 2yo was born February 8. To make matters worse, I was born February 3 and DH was born December 25 so all of our birthdays fall within a month and a half of each other :
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#11 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 06:03 PM
 
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My three kids' birthdays are all within six weeks of each other, and it's never been an issue. Like a previous poster, we just have a "birthday season."

At-home mom to a teenager, an infant, and three in between!
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#12 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 06:24 PM
 
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DS is my only so far, but in my family nt birthday is in March and my siblings birthday's are October 3rd, 7th and 7th (twins). My Mom's birthday is October 25th and my Dad's birthday is November 20th. Honestly having birthday's 4 days apart (or the same day) didn't bother my siblings at all, they had separate parties or sometimes the twins had a dual party. I was probably the most annoyed by all the birthday's then since everyone but me had a party in October, and I had to buy lots of presents then .

I really don't think close birthdays make that big of a difference, which is good now since DS' birthday is 10 days after mine.

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#13 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 06:31 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mommajb View Post
We just call it birthday season and enjoy it.
This is us!

August: Ds#2 (and Aunt, 1st cousin, and Grandma)
September: Ds#1 (and 1st cousin, Grandpa, and Aunt)
October: Ds#3 and Dh

My birthday is 2 weeks after my younger brother's, whose b-day is two days after Christmas -- that was a tough one!

Anyway, I think it's all in how you approach it!

Amanda and Dh, ds 09/00, ds 08/03, ds 10/05, and ds 05/08, and 3 :
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#14 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 06:33 PM
 
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my first two are 2 years minus 4 days apart, and it's never been an issue (they're 6 and 4). We homeschool, so they mostly have the same friends at this point anyway. So far we do one party for the two of them, but if they start objecting to that at some point, I'll just suck it up and do separate celebrations a week apart or something. My third's b-day is exactly six months away from my first's, but it's in December, so he doesn't really come out any better I don't think, sharing a birthday with xmas season.
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#15 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 06:34 PM
 
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My 2 youngest have b-days 2 weeks apart in June. Gotta say if it were my oldest and youngest having b-days that close together it might be easier for me, but as far as the kids go I have never gotten the impression that one feels slighted in any way. They have made it pretty clear that they do not want their parties combined, and since one is a boy and one a girl it actually works out OK (only have had 1 "kid" party for dd so far).

I'd say go for it, esp since you've been trying for awhile. Your kids may actually enjoy having b-days close together.
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#16 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 06:36 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mommajb View Post
We just call it birthday season and enjoy it.


Ds2 Oct 22
Dd2 Nov 21
Ds1 and Me Nov 25
Dh Jan 6
Dd1 Jan 10

We love it!

Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#17 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 07:48 PM
 
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My sister and I have birthdays 9 days apart (I am 1 year and 9 days older). We had several joint parties and our only issue was that people usually gave us the same thing as birthday presents. Not a problem for me, but my sister whose birthday was after mine, got bummed out sometimes that she no longer had a surprise to open. So I would just say to make things different somehow, and other than that, it is great. My dad has 5 brothers and a sister, and of the 6 boys, 2 were born on the same birthday (not twins), 2 had birthdays 1 day apart, and my dad and his other brother have birthdays just over a week apart. I don't think any of them ever had issues either, and they just did family parties.

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#18 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 09:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for all of the replies! I didn't even think of the fact that ds1 has a birthday 2 weeks after Christmas. So he would share with xmas, and the other two would share with each other! I've been finding the thought of not ttc this month rather difficult. Now, if only my dh doesn't get home super late from work tonight...

Marie-Mom to two boys and a girl.
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#19 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 09:22 PM
 
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I was born 5 ys and 16 days after my brother. His bday is mid-march, and mine's late march.

I can't speak for him, but I always thought it was cool having my birthday so close to his.

His birthday celebrations always got me excited about my own birthday.

My sister's birthday is 5 days after my mother's.

My son's is 10 days before my husband's.


Can't really control when birthdays are!


Right before my son was born, and I was lamenting to a friend that the baby might be born on my husband's birthday and so DS would never have his own special day, she told me that her husband was born on his father's birthday, and that he always LOVED sharing a day with Dad!

I'm actually kind of sad that my daughter's birthday is all alone in February.... her name looks so lonely on the calendar since there's no other family birthdays then! I was hoping she could hang on for 3 more days, and then she and I would share March! (Along with my brother! )
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#20 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 09:45 PM
 
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I have three.

My daughter's birthday is September 16.
My sons' birthdays are November 16 and 28.

Most of their cousins have fall birthdays. Throw in Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's, and the kids think fall/early winter is just one long party! No one seems to mind .
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#21 of 39 Old 12-10-2007, 11:44 PM
 
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My son is end of June and my daughter is middle of July. It's never been a problem. The first few years we did a combined birthday party (they're two years apart). Last year I was sick of doing birthdays so I took them to the beach for their birthday and we ate out and generally had a really special day. This year we'll probably do the same thing. The biggest problem actually comes with their little sister having a Feb birthday. They are happy for her birthday, but wish theirs was sooner!

It's never been a problem before. I assume in the future, when they each have their own set of friends, they'll each have their own party- a small one.

My sister and I are a month apart in birthdays. I never even really noticed it.

Married, college student, part time work from home mom to DS (12), DD1 (10) and DD2 (9) and a giant dopey newfoundland, a crazy border collie mix, 3 black cats and two rats.
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#22 of 39 Old 12-11-2007, 12:56 PM
 
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My two older kids have birthdays 4 days apart. They are 4 years 4 days apart in age. Last year, we had their 5th & 1st birthday party together, but this year we had our DS's 6th birthday party at the bowling alley and then did DD's 2nd birthday party at our house, but on the same day. They don't seem to mind at all. It's really not a big deal, IMO. Actually, I think it's kind of cool, because you don't have the one birthday child getting all the presents and the sad other child not getting any.
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#23 of 39 Old 12-11-2007, 02:16 PM
 
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Briar is 12/8/95 and Grayson is 12/9/97. We have one big party for both and then smaller family celebrations on each of their days. So far they have not complained.
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#24 of 39 Old 12-11-2007, 02:45 PM
 
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Dd's share a birthday (twins) and mine is the day before - hasn't been a problem yet, but I'm thinking for a few years coming I may have to celebrate the day AFTER theirs to be able to enjoy it without dd's wanting it to be their birthday.
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#25 of 39 Old 12-11-2007, 02:46 PM
 
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don't give it another thought.

babies come when they come and even with the best planning the little bugger can come early or late and still land on their siblings birthday. such is life.

The truest answer to violence is love. The truest answer to death is life. The only prevention for violence is for the heart to have no violence within it.  We cannot prevent evil through any system devised by mankind. But we can grapple with evil and defeat it, but only with love—real love.

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#26 of 39 Old 12-11-2007, 03:56 PM
 
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My grandmother's birthday is March 15. Mine is March 19. My sister is March 20. Another sister is March 26. Now my nephew is March 1.

Mind you, the only reason my first sister's birthday is the 20th and not the 19th is because my mother refused to go to the hospital until midnight so we wouldn't share a birthday (she knew she was going to have a c-section because of prior medical history). Was her doctor ever mad!

We loved it growing up because it meant that our grandparents from far away always came to visit during our birthday season. My older brother's birthday is August, and our youngest siblings are twins born in November. Sometimes there would be a visit around the twins' birthday too (which also happens to be my DS's birthday), but never for my brother, because his birthday was all alone.
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#27 of 39 Old 12-11-2007, 05:35 PM
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My parents had thee kids, and two of us had the same birth date. My one other brother was born on my parents' anniversary.
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#28 of 39 Old 12-11-2007, 06:46 PM
 
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My three oldest kids and dh's birthdays are all within two weeks of each other. Dh Sept. 13, DD sept 19, DD Sept 27, DS Oct 2. Week do something special on each persons real birthday. Usually just a special dinner and grandparents come over we have cake and a few family gifts. Then the kids usually have a group party with all of their friends. This year the two oldest each had small slumber parties on different weekends and the 3 year old had a small party in the middle of a weekday with just her preschool friends. It always works out fine and no one feels short changed. We are pretty sick of cake by Oct 3.:
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#29 of 39 Old 12-11-2007, 07:13 PM
 
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DS1 was born on November 24th, DS2 on August 23rd (1st birthday babe) and DD on November 26th. It's kind of cool having the midwife who caught you at your seventh birthday party because mummy might be in labour with your sibling, apparently That said, cake is bad and evil I still haven't recovered from the overload.
Because Isaac's birthday is in the middle of the school holiday, he had an unbirthday party this year on Nov 25th. That was fun

Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.
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#30 of 39 Old 12-11-2007, 07:41 PM
 
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I've got three kids.

My oldest two have birthdays just 4 days apart. So far, we've only done combined birthday 'parties' with family - they've not complained. But they are only 3 and 5, so the complaints may come yet.

Of those two - the younger was born on my sister's birthday.
Which is followed just 4 days later by my brother-in-laws birthday.

Canadian mom to Boo (Aug '02), Bug (Aug '04) and Bear (Dec '06).
Jesse (July '09)
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