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#541 of 582 Old 02-05-2009, 10:25 PM
 
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Any chance of a new thread, or should I read 27 pages (y'all know how big an undertaking that is for mamas like us - procrastination and fear of failure = zero progress for me, these days!!)

Hi everyone...I was initial diagnosed with profound anxiety, and with an excellent psychologist realized (and OMG, did it FIT with the rest of my life, grade school through law school) that I have ADD as well. Actually, that's in large part what sets off anxiety - lack of filters.

I'm on meds (adderall - I tried Vyvanse and it just wasn't effective for me, that and strattera)- without them I'm a trainwreck. Just glad to have found this thread!

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#542 of 582 Old 02-06-2009, 01:32 AM
 
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Thanks for all of the links and info. I made an appointment with my doctor for tomorrow..hopefully he can refer me to someone that can help!
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#543 of 582 Old 02-06-2009, 05:56 AM
 
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I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. My eldest has mild case of ADD. I'm lucky that I have a very patient and understanding and sweet husband.
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#544 of 582 Old 02-06-2009, 12:24 PM
 
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Well, what i have to say may not be very popular here, but i will share what a psychiatrist and I discussed and decided.

I am breastfeeding my son, and I am having a hell of a time with my ADHD and all that comes with having that. So, she put me on ritalin, even tho i am breastfeeding.

There are NO human studies on pregnancy or breastfeeding mothers and the use of ritalin, however there is an animal study done using pregnant mice. Can you believe that, that this is the ONLY study?! I know that exposing pregnant and breastfeeding mothers would be a completely unethical study to undertake, but you would think that there was some type of information on the subject.

The results of the mice study was that there was a small effect on the offspring if the ritalin exposure was far higher than would be used by a human being.

Basically, the recommended course of action there is to take a pro vs con approach.

It is known by the psychiatrist that I am a very responsible person with medication and my children, so she recommended that I take ritalin as needed 10 mg at a time. I am very sensitive, so this is typically all I need for very bad days where i cannot seem to control my propensity to hyperfocus (to the detriment of all who depend on me). It is imperitive that I be able to disengage and to stay on task when i need to.

It ultra difficult to run a family of 7 for anyone, but especially for someone who has ADHD, and whose husband is not the patient sort and who works all the time. I also have no family support, so i basically do it all on my own.

Having meds is vital, i just cannot get things running smoothly unmedicated, hell even medicated it is an incredible challange.

My children are also very very disorganized, so i am working hard to teach them better and to manage themselves. One has been diagnosed with adhd on top of down syndrome (but i am not convinced,) another with anxiety (but i am positive she has distractable type ADHD as a primary issue) my youngest daughter is going through assessment, the doc thinks she may be ODD, i am unsure about that, but i say definately ADHD. So can you see, the absolute importance of being medicated?

When my son is finished nursing, i will be going back on wellbutrin, which does have an undesired effect on babies. Actually, the only thing i seen happen with my son and using the little dose of ritalin i do use (and very infrequently) is that he was over sleepy most of the day on two occassions.

I think the coffee i drink to self medicate has more of an effect on him than the ritalin does.

I do tend to look at mental health and functioning very deeply because i majored in psychology in university and have minors in woman's studies and sociology. I really hope to go back to school and get my graduate degree. School was very hard for me, but also kept me sane because my mind was being fed on a regular basis.

I am really trying not to go off topic here, so i will end this post. I hope this helps someone else.
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#545 of 582 Old 02-06-2009, 01:47 PM
 
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I have a theory about ADD/ADHD. I think that back when we lived in very family-centered communities, ADHD wasn't such a big deal. We were the distracted, intellectual people, who were allowed to wander around and do what needed to be done and hyperfocus, because we had family and friends always there to pick up the slack. So there was never any real slack, you know?

But now that we live in such a decentralized society (at least here, in the US) with more focus on the workplace than on the home, we have trouble fitting in. Because now, we're supposed to be fitting into this mold of "modern woman" who has the kids, the job, and still manages to look good doing it (: who DOES that, right??).

Anyways, that's my theory - society's screwed up, not us. What we need is a community.

Sharon, my DH is (undiagnosed) Asperger's. You're in good company.

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#546 of 582 Old 02-06-2009, 02:12 PM
 
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Originally Posted by heidirk View Post
but I was ready to throw the baby out a window. That's bad, especially when it's not your baby.

So get this! I got the Motivated Mom's thing, and I CAN"T FIND IT! I mean I got the PDF download, and I can't find it! How did I lose a DOWNLOAD???????????

Maggirayne, how's the babe?
Ugh, I know the feeling. I was babysitting a 3yo and 1 yo and the 3 yo was just getting to be too much, pushing and biting my DD. So he went to a daycare center with kids his age, which has been good, and then watched the little one for 2 more months until morning sickness and being tired just wore me out too much. And it was only 3 days a week.

Did you look in the Downloads folder? If you use Firefox, it saves all downloads to your desktop. The file is titled 2002 Book Motivated Moms, I think I just took the %20% out and put in spaces.

Baby is doing great. Elisabeth is so little, but she talks to the baby and kisses my tummy. She loooooves babies! I borrowed the HypnoBabies course from a friend and am excited about that. He's been kicking. We aren't finding out, but I think we've got a boy. Just a feeling. All the time w/DD, I called the baby she/her, and she was.

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Originally Posted by BlueStateMama View Post
Any chance of a new thread, or should I read 27 pages (y'all know how big an undertaking that is for mamas like us - procrastination and fear of failure = zero progress for me, these days!!)

Hi everyone...I was initial diagnosed with profound anxiety, and with an excellent psychologist realized (and OMG, did it FIT with the rest of my life, grade school through law school) that I have ADD as well. Actually, that's in large part what sets off anxiety - lack of filters.

I'm on meds (adderall - I tried Vyvanse and it just wasn't effective for me, that and strattera)- without them I'm a trainwreck. Just glad to have found this thread!
Hi! BlueStateMama, welcome!
Well, it depends what you're searching for. This is a mix of info and chit-chat. And oh, what else, well, anything a bunch of fun ADD mamas throw out. But you can search for supplements or meds or chores or ideas. And, for me, I like to have the threads set on 100 posts instead of 20, and then they aren't so dauntingly long. This one is only 6 pages long. Or just start asking questions. Most of us are still here. This isn't a thread you grow out of. Haha!

You can post your to do list, and we'll cheer with you.
Which is what I came to do this morning!

Quote:
Originally Posted by sharon.gmc View Post
I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. My eldest has mild case of ADD. I'm lucky that I have a very patient and understanding and sweet husband.
Welcome, ask away! We have fun here.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SquishyBuggles View Post
Hi...I don't know if I should be here or not yet as I haven't been diagnosed ADD. I never, EVER suspected that I had it until LAST NIGHT. I was reading something about adult ADD and it fit me to a T. I have been diagnosed with OCD in the past but I've wondered if that was accurate. Now that I am looking into ADD it seems like my OCD behaviors could fit in with that, too. I took an online ADD quiz (I know, online tests are in no way a diagnosis!) and it scored me as having a VERY HIGH possibility to having ADD.
My indicators:
I am VERY spacy. I am a horrible, horrible procrastinator. I am highly unorganized, highly stressed all the time. Very forgetful. I can forget something that someone is saying AS I am speaking to them. I tune things out. I have lots of problems with my short term memory.
Welcome! I found out I was ADD when I was in college an studying Exceptional Children or one of those classes and started going, "Huh? This sounds like me!"

Okay, my list for today:
Wash sheets
Sort piles in bedroom
Get rid of!
Fold laundry? nah, Sat, gotta make room, lol
Pack most of E's diapers, since she's out of them! :
Make a meal for a friend and deliver
Playdate after lunch whee!

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#547 of 582 Old 02-07-2009, 03:00 PM
 
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Okay, my list for today: Moved to Saturday
Done yesterday!
Pack most of E's diapers, since she's out of them! :
Make a meal for a friend and deliver
Playdate after lunch whee!
Get rid of! One bag gone!

Today!
Wash sheets
Sort piles in bedroom
Fold laundry? nah, Sat, gotta make room, lol

I'm debating if I should keep some out for nighttime, since she's not consistently dry all the time, but wets maybe 2x a week? Sigh. But she doesn't mind wearing them, but I think it's easier to potty in the morning w/o a dipe.

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#548 of 582 Old 02-08-2009, 03:31 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by smeisnotapirate View Post
I have a theory about ADD/ADHD. I think that back when we lived in very family-centered communities, ADHD wasn't such a big deal. We were the distracted, intellectual people, who were allowed to wander around and do what needed to be done and hyperfocus, because we had family and friends always there to pick up the slack. So there was never any real slack, you know?

But now that we live in such a decentralized society (at least here, in the US) with more focus on the workplace than on the home, we have trouble fitting in. Because now, we're supposed to be fitting into this mold of "modern woman" who has the kids, the job, and still manages to look good doing it (: who DOES that, right??).

Anyways, that's my theory - society's screwed up, not us. What we need is a community.

Sharon, my DH is (undiagnosed) Asperger's. You're in good company.
I say amen!

Pumpkinkat, you've got your hands full, for sure. You are nursing your 10 month old? Is he taking any solids or is he exclusively breastfed? If you're not nursing him exclusively, the risk is mitigated.

This might be unpopular to say, but would you consider weaning him before you start Ritalin? Maybe the benefits would be worth weaning?

Someone moved my effing cheese.
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#549 of 582 Old 02-08-2009, 10:07 AM
 
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Hey everyone! Welcome to the new "faces." We've been house hunting and we're about to find out the sex of the baby. i had an ultrasound friday at the hospital but I'm actually three weeks behind where they thought and things were hard to see...they thought girl but not sure. I'm going to a fun 3d ultrasound on wednesday and we will know for sure then cuz this lady really knows what she's doing.

We got the house SOOOO clean last weekend but now it's already a mess again, *sigh.*

We need to file our tax returns this week too, my W-2 finally came.

I'll try to post a to-do list tomorrow, I don't have time this morning. Gotta meet the realtor at the first house in 2 hours!

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#550 of 582 Old 02-08-2009, 11:16 PM
 
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Journeymom, I love your Siggy: How we spend our days is how we spend our years.

Mamabohl, what a fun week! House-hunting is a long process! How many weeks are you?

I'm at 24 weeks today! Where did the time go? And have hit a huge grumpy/hormone time. Sigh. Or else DH has. :P

Well, I saw on another forum a get-rid-of-2009 things in 2009, and woohoo, I got inspired! I also made a list of stuff I need to do before baby comes.

So far this week:
I got rid of a ton of non-nursing/pregnant friendly clothes
Sorted my winter and summer clothes and got rid of a ton
Sorted all DD's 2T clothes (got rid of a bunch of stuff I didn't like or use)
Packed up her diapers (she is in underwear almost 24/7 at 21 months, thank God for EC!
Got new baby's diaper stash ready (I've got small tubs I keep them in)
Got a bunch of stuff to put on DS (which I didn't count toward my tunnel)
Sorted Laundry
Am working on folding the clean pile that swallowed my loveseat

Yay, I got it done and mostly put away.
Now my bed is under a pile of clothes to hang and put in drawers.

To Do:
Must Do
Get Twin bed to put next to ours
Get birth kit
Go through toys
Figure out somewhere to put baby's clothes

Finish cleaning house
Clean second bedroom--sort tons of boxes :P

Wanna Do:
Post more books on PaperBackSwap
Finish painting detail on a desk I started stripping right before I got pg w/DD
Get drawers of desk shaved down so they fit back in

For my total this week, I am up to 114 things to get rid of!!!! :

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#551 of 582 Old 02-09-2009, 02:05 PM
 
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Oh I'm doing 2009 in 2009 too! So far I have decluttered 31 items, lol.

I'm almost 18 weeks now, I thought I was at 20 last week but then the ultrasound showed me at around 17ish.

I'm sure the grumpiness is your dh.

We are loving house hunting. We've already looked at 19 houses in 1 week!!

Today I need to

make empanandas for dinner (I love love this meal, but it takes soooo long, ug)
write the grocery list and I guess go grocery shopping tonight or have dh do it
Do lots of dishes
Pick up
turn off the dang TV. :

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#552 of 582 Old 02-09-2009, 02:10 PM
 
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oh, I forgot to add that I did get a shower today and file taxes.

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#553 of 582 Old 02-09-2009, 03:23 PM
 
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OMG, taxes. :

My DH is convinced, after a thorough reading of the US Tax Code (don't ask ), that the government is taxing us illegally according to their definitions, so he's declaring "no income" on taxes this year. I told him fine, do what he wants, but we're declaring my income.

Someone has to take care of Toby when he gets arrested.

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#554 of 582 Old 02-09-2009, 04:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by smeisnotapirate View Post
OMG, taxes. :

My DH is convinced, after a thorough reading of the US Tax Code (don't ask ), that the government is taxing us illegally according to their definitions, so he's declaring "no income" on taxes this year. I told him fine, do what he wants, but we're declaring my income.

Someone has to take care of Toby when he gets arrested.
:



BTW- I happen to agree with you about our society being the part that's messed up, not us. And if we had that community you'de like, we wouldn't have to pay taxes!



Well, I looked again for that file, and I can't find it anywhere. :

So today this is me- : I'm JUST a mommy today!(and a wife/housekeeper/cook/member of the clergy/soon to be student again)

OOPs, there goes Milo! bye!

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#555 of 582 Old 02-09-2009, 06:13 PM
 
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oh, I forgot to add that I did get a shower today and file taxes.
Yay, I wanna get a shower. I should have yesterday before church, but I hate going out in the cold with wet hair. And I hate showering in the morning. I loooove long hot baths, I wish maybe tonight? Hmm, I gotta do some shopping tonight, or tomorrow. We have one car while DH's going to get fixed. I'm rather spoiled; I like having my own car. So we play car tag.

Taxes, I'm glad DH does them. I guess I did do okay the one year I worked and wasn't in college and wasn't married. My dad did mine all through college. Which was nice and easy.

Quote:
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Oh I'm doing 2009 in 2009 too! So far I have decluttered 31 items, lol.
Yay! Are you on GCM or is there one going on in the forums here?

Is anyone else here on GCM?

Quote:
I'm almost 18 weeks now, I thought I was at 20 last week but then the ultrasound showed me at around 17ish.
Hey, better earlier than later. All I hear about people getting pushed to induce. You're not overdue until 42 weeks and 1 DAY! :

I lost track around Christmas and said I was 17 weeks for like three weeks and when I had my Jan. appt w/my MW I was 21 weeks.
Quote:
I'm sure the grumpiness is your dh.
Thanks. It is a bit of both. I was reading in the May DDC and someone asked if there was a huge hormone surge/mood change at 6 mos pg. And everyone was like yeah, at 24 or 26 weeks I turned into a mean ol' lady. I don't recall that with DD the first time around. Did you, Heidi?

Quote:
We are loving house hunting. We've already looked at 19 houses in 1 week!!
How can you keep them all straight?! We looked at 5 one day and shew!
Have you seen any you like?
IMO, houses are like spouses, when you find the right one, you know. But then we haven't found our house, so. . .
Quote:
Today I need to

make empanandas for dinner (I love love this meal, but it takes soooo long, ug)
write the grocery list and I guess go grocery shopping tonight or have dh do it
Do lots of dishes
Pick up
turn off the dang TV. :
Yay, DH got the dishwasher done so we can put dirty dishes straight in. It's usually got clean dishes.
I make Mexican hotdish that is really good and really easy, I can post the recipe if anyone's interested.
Sigh, I'm lying on the couch and wondering if I put PBS on for DD if she be quiet and let me rest. .

Quote:
Originally Posted by smeisnotapirate View Post
My DH is convinced, after a thorough reading of the US Tax Code (don't ask ), that the government is taxing us illegally according to their definitions, so he's declaring "no income" on taxes this year. I told him fine, do what he wants, but we're declaring my income.
Eeek. Altho' I kinda think taxes are unconstitutional, they were originally only for paying for the Revolutionary War, but I like paved roads and snow removal and well, enough things I don't worry about it.

Altho' I so don't get why it's a graduated tax and not uniform, but oh well.
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Originally Posted by heidirk View Post
And if we had that community you'd like, we wouldn't have to pay taxes!
ITA Personally, I think if people in churches took care of those like the early church did, there would be no need for welfare or unemployment or foster care or homeless shelters or. . . you get the idea. But we, and I include myself, don't think or live like that. I want to be able to offer a place to a teen mom to have her baby and help her change and keep her baby if she wants. I would love to create a community where single moms can work and be close to their kids and don't have to choose daycare. And where families live and grow their own food and help each other instead of this ridiculous isolated culture we live in.
Okay, Dream over.

Quote:
Well, I looked again for that file, and I can't find it anywhere. :
Heidi, don't be like me, just download it again.

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#556 of 582 Old 02-09-2009, 07:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I am too dang stubborn to download it again, and pay for it. Hrmph. Maybe if I emailed them andpled my case, they'd take pitty on me and send me a new one?


I share our dream, seriously, our wolrd has its priorities SOOOOOO off base by now, I think it's hopeless.

As for 24-27 weeks- I was pregnant then? I can hardly remember them. I was probably a witch on wheels the whole stinkin' time!


Well, I foprgopt to add thaty I've hired a mother's helper. !!!!!!! I'm so happy. She came over today, and I got Henry's room picked up, and VACUUMED!!! all in the same day! (where's the shining your fingernails on your sleeve smiley?) So three days a week, I will have an jour or two when I cannot under any circumstances make any excuses, I must clean!

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#557 of 582 Old 02-09-2009, 08:57 PM
 
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Motivated Moms download: I think they'd make a tidy sum if they'd offer loss insurance. You could pay an additional $1 when you first pay for it, then when you loose it you can download it again, one time, for free.

Someone moved my effing cheese.
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#558 of 582 Old 02-09-2009, 09:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by smeisnotapirate View Post
OMG, taxes. :

My DH is convinced, after a thorough reading of the US Tax Code (don't ask ), that the government is taxing us illegally according to their definitions, so he's declaring "no income" on taxes this year. I told him fine, do what he wants, but we're declaring my income.

Someone has to take care of Toby when he gets arrested.
I love that.

I happen to agree.
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#559 of 582 Old 02-10-2009, 08:01 PM
 
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I am too dang stubborn to download it again, and pay for it. Hrmph. Maybe if I emailed them andpled my case, they'd take pitty on me and send me a new one?

As for 24-27 weeks- I was pregnant then? I can hardly remember them. I was probably a witch on wheels the whole stinkin' time!

Well, I foprgopt to add thaty I've hired a mother's helper. !!!!!!! I'm so happy. She came over today, and I got Henry's room picked up, and VACUUMED!!! all in the same day! (where's the shining your fingernails on your sleeve smiley?) So three days a week, I will have an jour or two when I cannot under any circumstances make any excuses, I must clean!
Yay! Hmm, ya know, I do have friend who's daughter goes to middle school fairly close-ish, if she could get a ride to my place, or for having the help, I suppose I could pick her up, duh, she could be here an afternoon a week. And I could maybe nap or do whatever uninterrupted. Hmm. . .
And Elisabeth just loved her, the girl and her mom stopped by the other day. Altho' I don't if I can justify it now, well, considering I was so frustrated with E I wanted to spank her earlier today, and then maybe I wouldn't feel like checking out when DH comes home, and I just let him play with her. . .

Oh, I didn't realize you'd paid for the download. I would suggest emailing and explaining or asking for the file name so you can run a search for it.

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#560 of 582 Old 02-10-2009, 08:33 PM
 
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Sorry for crashing right in here (although, if anyone at MDC would be understanding of that, it would be you guys right? )

I was diagnosed with ADHD in the Summer 2007 as an adult. I had an 8 month old at the time so I didn't go on meds. Things have gotten really bad for me and I find I can't cope with life most days. I also have an SN child and I'm stretched incredibly thin.

So, I'm thinking I really so try the meds. But I'm terrified. What tests do I need to have done beforehand to make sure I don't drop dead? How do you decide which meds to take? What happens if you go off the meds? Is it possible or are you stuck taking them forever?

Sorry this seems so irrational, I'm a bit of a mess right now.

Martha
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#561 of 582 Old 02-10-2009, 11:38 PM
 
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Hey, welcome! Jump right on in! And yes, we do understand!

I can answer any questions re: meds. But some of the other gals can!

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#562 of 582 Old 02-11-2009, 05:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by kittynurse View Post
Sorry for crashing right in here (although, if anyone at MDC would be understanding of that, it would be you guys right? )

I was diagnosed with ADHD in the Summer 2007 as an adult. I had an 8 month old at the time so I didn't go on meds. Things have gotten really bad for me and I find I can't cope with life most days. I also have an SN child and I'm stretched incredibly thin.

So, I'm thinking I really so try the meds. But I'm terrified. What tests do I need to have done beforehand to make sure I don't drop dead? How do you decide which meds to take? What happens if you go off the meds? Is it possible or are you stuck taking them forever?

Sorry this seems so irrational, I'm a bit of a mess right now.

Martha

Here's me leaping into action- Well, my brain is anyway! Crash away! We welcome you!

Please, please, DON'T be terrified. The only tests you really need done sound like they've been done already- diagnostic tests by a qualified psychologist. If you've been diagnosed, have a few more tests run to rule out other possible diagnoses that might change the way you sould use medicines. Many adults with ADD are successfully traeted with anti-depressants first, and then when the depression passes, stimulants and anti anxiety meds.

From what I understand none of these carry death as a significant side effect risk. And yes it's possible to go off of them, I did. And if circumstances conspire against me, I will consider (am considering) going back on them.

As for being stretched thin, and irrational, I can almost guarrantee you that every parent ever has felt that way, even 'normals'! Some people hide it well, others lie! You are probably doing better than you realise.

Find some support! Well, we're here, but YKWIM, real life helping hands to fill in where you can't be.

Keep us posted, and we'd love to hear about your DC.


CHANGE OF SUBJECT

What do we think about starting a new thread? We're nowhere near the posts limit, but it IS unweildy for newcomers. I haveno idea how to do a poll, so please just post your vote. We'll stay in this forum most likely, unless you all feel we should move.

Thanks,
Heidi

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#563 of 582 Old 02-11-2009, 06:18 PM
 
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i'm fine with that... just make sure a link to the new thread is posted

I'm Andrea - I have three boys - 12 year old twins & an 11 year old

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#564 of 582 Old 02-11-2009, 07:05 PM
 
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Ditto Andrea.

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Mama of three, lover, student rabbi, spoonie, friend, musician, narcoleptic, space muffin, pretty much a dragon. Crunchy like matzoh.

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#565 of 582 Old 02-11-2009, 09:10 PM
 
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And that the new thread has a link to this one.
Good idea!

What if we did a monthly chatty thread? Just to throw out another idea to make all us ADDers : Hehe!

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#566 of 582 Old 02-11-2009, 10:58 PM
 
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And that the new thread has a link to this one.
Good idea!

What if we did a monthly chatty thread? Just to throw out another idea to make all us ADDers : Hehe!

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#567 of 582 Old 02-11-2009, 11:58 PM
 
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Decisive!

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...8#post13174828

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#568 of 582 Old 02-13-2009, 01:06 PM
 
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Pumpkinkat, you've got your hands full, for sure. You are nursing your 10 month old? Is he taking any solids or is he exclusively breastfed? If you're not nursing him exclusively, the risk is mitigated.

This might be unpopular to say, but would you consider weaning him before you start Ritalin? Maybe the benefits would be worth weaning?
Yes, he is a boy who loves to eat food. The doctor told me that until I wean i should only take a 10mg ritalin as needed, after he is weaned I go on wellbutrin and a higher dose of ritalin.

Ideally, having him weaned before i take any sort of medication would be optimal. However, he is so attached to nursing at this point in his life, i think it would be very traumatic on him to stop.

The doctor took the pro vs con approach and told me i should take this small amount once a day. So far, i have taken one 10 mg pill in the last 3 weeks. So I am doing ok there.

I probably could should have taken more, as i have not been able to keep up or keep my mind focused. Except the last 2 days, i have been more productive because i am keeping my bible open to some verses that are helping me get more done. Albeit, only some. Any change is good, right?

I too like your quote. It is very motivating, kinda like some of the verses i have been reading.
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#569 of 582 Old 02-13-2009, 01:35 PM
 
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ITA Personally, I think if people in churches took care of those like the early church did, there would be no need for welfare or unemployment or foster care or homeless shelters or. . . you get the idea. But we, and I include myself, don't think or live like that. I want to be able to offer a place to a teen mom to have her baby and help her change and keep her baby if she wants. I would love to create a community where single moms can work and be close to their kids and don't have to choose daycare. And where families live and grow their own food and help each other instead of this ridiculous isolated culture we live in.
Okay, Dream over.
I have some of these same thoughts. I had spent many years as a single mom.I am married now, but my husband is gone so much and we have so little money, it is very similar to when i was still a single mother. You know, the lack of money and being responsible for all of the childcare/homecare/homemaking etc. I have it in my heart to start some programs that do not exist in my community. There are supports and services that I have really needed that just are not available.

The early churches did help folks, but they also split people into groups such as the deserving and undeserving poor. They did reject those they deemed as undeserving. Hmmm, that still happens, doesn't it?

I really do long for change too. I wish that parents could stay home and generate income that way, with thier children next to them, assisting and learning their craft and skills. we really have lost that as a culture.

I am actually trying to teach myself to sew, garden, preserve, and to be more self reliant, as i feel these are very important skills to have and to pass on.

Many wisdoms are being lost, especially in native cultures. I live in an area that has a very high native population, so i see the effect of this, and it is heartbreaking. The people need their culture back. I know some who are working on this, but it is difficult being that something as vital as language is lost. There is no one who speaks the language indigenous this specific region. the people are being taught languages from first nations communities close to here, but not the original one. One of the most effective ways to destroy a culture is to take their language. This happened in Ireland, and has happened here in Canada with residential schools. My friend's father has scars on his arms from where pins were inserted by the nuns when he spoke his own language as a young boy. He could not speak any other language.

This is sad, very very sad indeed.

Yeah, i went off topic, i tend to do that, sorry. But I just wanted to say that the price we all pay for the loss of community is high, and i totally agree with all who mentioned it in this thread.
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#570 of 582 Old 02-13-2009, 01:36 PM
 
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i see you ladies quoting multiple people, but i cannot see how to do that in one post. How do i do this?
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