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#181 of 582 Old 10-07-2008, 12:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh, my goodness, yes! And the first time it caused me a real emotional crisis, because I had things under control before that, and suddenly it was, I'm-sticking-milk-in-the-pantry-and-salting-my-coffee kind of a deal. I locked myself out of my house no less than three times while preggo with DS. Can you imagine an 8 mos peggo woman up on a ladder prying open the screen on her kitchen window? I split my pants crawling in, too!

At least this time, I knew it was comeing!

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#182 of 582 Old 10-07-2008, 12:45 AM
 
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Yeah, I can imagine, being that I was 6 month pregnant lady climbing up on a picnic cooler trying to get into a window while my 3yo stood outside and watched in amusement, when the cooler fell away, and my legs got stuck/hooked in the window, and scraped my legs all the way down, almost fell and broke my neck, had to make efforts to fall so that I wouldn't fall on my big swole stomach. I can definitely imagine. Sigh. I had to leave and go to my husband's job and bring him back to get into the window for me. He told one of his older (elderly?) coworkers what I had done, and she like to had a fit on me. Fussed me out. She was right.

Yeah, in retrospect, this did seem to start quite some time ago.

I lost my wallet. Have no idea where that is at this point. Lost my brand new prepay credit card my husband got for me, with the roses on it.

Some things are on autopilot now. Like, it physically doesn't feel right to me to lock the door going out unless my keys are in my hand at the same time.

Other things just flew into the wind.

But typing is so weird these last few days. I keep leaving out whole words and whole phrases in my sentences. I usually love writing in message boards. But I feel like such a dunce, it's not working.

Also, when people are trying to explain something complex to me, I am nearly incapable of comprehending. I forget what I was talking about a lot, and when I do say something, my brain skips a beat or something and I miss say a lot of my words or leave entire phrases or thoughts out of what I was trying to say.

It's so hard to explain. I'm stuck in my head and need a nap. Sigh.
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#183 of 582 Old 10-07-2008, 01:59 AM
 
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Hi!

This thread has tested my ADHD... I didn't make it through the whole thing, but I WILL. Just wanted to post and get in on the talking, right away!
Quote:
Originally Posted by heidirk View Post
Hooray!

I find having ADD helpful in caring for kids. I remember vividly how being a kid was, so it's easy for me to look at him and say, OK...He's upset about X let's try THIS.

I also found a neat book, The Gift of ADHD. I recommend reading that while you still have brain cells left!
I'm looking into that book... I find my ADHD to be like a massive engine that propels me through my hectic schedule at break-neck speeds that would crush the average human will.

I semi-jokingly refer to my ADHD as my super-power.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 636Jen View Post
<snip>
She could be very thankful that it's just not "HER" it's a chemical imbalance that is treatable. She could just be relieved. I know my oldest was!
<snip>
The feeling that accompanied my diagnosis of ADHD 15 years ago (when I was about 18) is the same feeling that accompanied being diagnosed with asthma 7 years before that: "Oh, ok... well it explains a LOT, and I'm relieved. BUT, there is a certain view of people with this diagnosis, and that bugs me..."

I still feel the same way about both diagnoses.

Do any of you think about your diagnosis as you would a diagnosis of any other imbalance or ailment? So may folks still perceive ADHD as a defect... a defficiency (Attention Defficit), that it seems difficult for some to bridge the gap between imbalance and imperfection.

I'm for redefining ADHD as a 'divergent mind-set'... or even as a different skill-set.

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Originally Posted by annettemarie View Post
Hi there! In the interest of limiting FYT to subjects not hosted elsewhere on the board, we have moved your tribe here. You're still a tribe, which means you're still support-only. If you have any questions about the move, please do not discuss it on the boards. Rather, contact an administrator or start a thread in Questions and Suggestions. Thanks, and happy posting!
SO glad you all moved over here...

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Originally Posted by Maggirayne View Post
<snip> We were in tribes and got moved, here, which has been good because more mamas have found us.
.......And, had you not moved, I would NOT have found you, as I just don't go into the Tribes area much... never been much of a joiner, kwim?

I was pretty surprised when I saw this thread... I love this feeling, of having found my people... I have experienced it in a couple other threads, but it's a rarity, even here on MDC.

So.........
At the risk of getting long-winded (and I do get long-winded), I am anxious to share with you all, and look forward to your insights...




I have a pediatrician FIL who is a self-made, self-proclaimed expert on ADHD. He attends seminar after seminar, conference after conference; writes and speaks publicly on the topic extensively, (FIL has comented that experts in the field no longer differentiate between ADD and ADHD, and that ADHD is the preferred term, ADD being basically discarded by those in the profession... take that as you like) and has (in some ways) inspired me to follow my childhood dream (with a bit of amending) of being a pediatrician. I, too, am currently in school (in addition to the multitude of things I'm involved in), and pursuing a doctorate in pediatric clinical/developmental psychology. (Tho, I might go for IandO instead, more money!) Dh jokes that my primary motivation for following this path is to take FIL to school...

Dh has ADHD as well... we have heard every joking reference to or inquiry regarding how life must be at our house with muted annoyance and some humor... but it gets old. I had to rein FIL in a bit around dd's 6th month, as he was pretty continuously referring to her as "double-gene-loaded," and openly anticipating the imminent diagnosis of ADHD.

Dh and I illustrate 2 ends on a continuum... Both of us with the ADHD diagnosis; he was medicated (aggressively, and by his own father...) for much of his childhood and adolescence, while my mother yanked me from a therapist (I was 16) that pointed her in the direction of medicating me with Ritalin before a diagnosis had ever been given, or treatment options. I pursued a behavioral path in my own treatment around 18, which is when I was diagnosed, and have used conscious behavioral modification as a means to manage my ADHD symptoms ever since, with mostly success, and some rough patches. Dh was medicated and we both self-medicated, illegally, when we got together. Then, while I was pregnant, there was no medicating of any kind, for me, and dh chose to go off his meds, citing the aggression he felt while medicated as a primary reason to be off them. His family was not pleased, and has made issue of his "unmedicated ADHD" ever since, specifically his dad.

Recently, dh and I hit rough patch. It was becoming more and more apparent to me that dh was suffering severe depression and anxiety, and he was loathe to get any help (having been theraputically burned by one's dad could do that I think) but we had reached critical mass. So he went to FIL and StepMIL to see if they might have colleagues to recommend (as they are both in the field). They did, he went, it was great. He's on Celexa (sp?) and quite proud of that... he tells everyone. "How you doing these days?" they ask... (for example his big sister); his reply: "GREAT! I'm on Celexa! And stuff that used to send me over the top just kind of bounces off, now... and I stopped hating myself!" He's had such a turn-around... It's like the man I married is back.

When asking after dh's "wellness" FIL and StepMIL constantly ask "So, what are you doing about the ADHD?" "When are you planning to treat the ADHD?" "What's his plan for the ADHD piece?" REALLY???? Seriously??? He's happy!!! He's GOOD. He might not ever do anything about the ADHD piece!! It just makes my head wanna

And now, dh is doing the same crap to me...

I was a SAHM until 20 months ago when I went to school. I held down a small direct sales consultant biz, during that time, and was very active in our community.

I am in school full-time, with 16 credits this term, 3 classes, 4 days a week. (Psy202, Math243, and Speech) I work as a part-time home-blesser/house-cleaner for MDC moms in my area, 3 days a week. (SIL thinks I should name my biz "Play-Date Cleaning Service" because generally, dd comes along, and has a play-date while I clean.) I volunteer at dd's pre-school 1 day a week, teach-assist at Baha'i school on Sundays, volunteer for dd's ballet/tap school performances, and work in women's mentoring, guided meditation, Virtues Parenting, and spiritual consultation. Sometimes, especially the first few weeks of school, I get a little addle-brained and forget things, lock the keys in the car, etc... Dh has been on me, recently, saying he thinks I need to medicate (with totally awesome side-notes about how ADHD meds will "help with your weight, too"). I am trying to be understanding that he has found renewed faith in the mental-health industry and medication; that he just wants to share that with me, is enthusiastic about it (like a born-again). But, suddenly, I find myself in doubt... should I medicate? Is there something wrong? And I feel like that adolescent girl again, suddenly unsure of my identity, tho I've felt such strong convictions regarding how I manage my ADHD for so long; wondering if I'm missing out on maximizing my potential via medication, or robbing dd of a more "together" mama........

I mean, I feel pretty together (if fact FIL once tried to tell me that he didn't believe I had ADHD... he wanted to know who diagnosed me, what were her credentials, etc... ). But I do forget things. The other day I had forgotten to grab dd's packed and ready lunch off the counter as we dashed out the door to school (she comes to my school and is in the on-site day-care, and they do sack lunch there). As we got out of the car I said "Whoops! I forgot your lunch! I guess I'll have to bring you one at lunch time." She says, "Mama, you've gotta stop being so forgetful!"

Can't I just have a bad day?? I mean 'normal' people have them, too!


Thoughts? On any of it...?



I'm very excited about this thread... I feel as tho I have found a treasure trove, and I look forward to conversations...




(now... back to reading this thread)
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#184 of 582 Old 10-07-2008, 02:03 AM
 
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Originally Posted by gabysmom617 View Post
So your, ad/hdishness got worse with pregnancy too? Ok, at least I'm not alone.
So... I've seen data to suggest that the hormones washing over an ADHD woman's brain while pregnant mimic the effects of ADHD meds, and that's what I exerienced... it was after I delivered dd that the ADHD reared its head so thoroughly, again.
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#185 of 582 Old 10-08-2008, 09:15 AM
 
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Hi all! I think I belong over here. I am pretty sure I have ADD, but I've never deen diagnosed. I don't have time right now, but I'll try to come back and write a real intro today or tomorrow. Just wanted to pop in and sub.

Genie, mama to T (4/02), I (10/04) and T (7/09)
 
 
 

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#186 of 582 Old 10-08-2008, 04:32 PM
 
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Originally Posted by samanthamommaof3 View Post
<snip>i have a TERRIBLE time multitasking... or actually i can multitask but none of my tasks EVER get completed.... and i have a hard time feeling motivated. if i drink caffiene i can GO GO GO and be fine and finish all my odd jobs in a day... but otherwise its like all of a sudden the day is gone and i've not done the dishes or not done the laundry and not done the yardwork etc.... and i'm like wth did i do all day? i mean i spend my days with my kids... but i feel so inadequet because my hubby comes home and is like um.... why are you jus sitting there with the kids/ playing online/ this or that... should i ask my doc about this? and if you do have add can you cope no meds?
I hate getting up and doing stuff, it's much easier to sit and do nothing. I can get stuff done when I have someone to talk to, so it's nice to call someone on the phone.
But when you are changing diapers, that takes a lot of time, gee! I get more done at lunch when DH is home and occupying DD or helping than all day, most days. I guess I'm a 'social' worker.

Quote:
Originally Posted by heidirk View Post
Maggirayne- I just realised I never answered one of your questions! (see the advantages of having a conversation in writing!).

I'll be birthing at a birth center, this time, last time was in a hospital, but I achieved my goal of an unmedicated birth. I am REALLY excited about this one!

I was just thinking, pregnancy and birth being such out of control events, you'd think they'd stress me out more than they do. Maybe it's easier to accept because it IS inherantly uncontrollable?

Where have you all birthed, and how has it effected your deliveries?

And who else has HUGE issues Post partum?
Heh, I never answered you!

My first birth was an unmedicated, fairly un-interventive hospital birth, which was somewhat disappointing, not the delivery, but after birth. I've dealt with a lot of anger at the unnecessary separation of my DD and me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by heidirk View Post
If you scan the thread, you'll see references to self medicating, prescriptions, etc. I don't know if this'll make you feel better or not, but here's what I accomplished today:

-I napped
-I gave my toes one coat of polish while DS napped
-I made lunch (go me)
-I threw a load of training pants in the wash at 7:30 am. . . they're still there.
-Oh, I did sort some nursing/fall clothes.

I wanted to get so much more done, but I didn't. I totally know what you mean about the whole, 'where did my day go?' thing.


Pumpkincat- you're allowed a minirant now and then! Unfortunately that happens so often in big churches, I know a woman who had the exact same thing happen to her. She had a baby at age 18, she was alone, no help, and when her mom asked the church if someone could at least deliver a meal for them, she was told, "Noone does that right now" My church is tiny by a lot of standards, but when someone needs help, everyone pitches in.

Unfortunately, this one experience with my mentor at church is the absolute best to have happened in some time. As far as she and the requirements she's placed on me are concerned, it's been horrendous.
Wow, I hate it when churches are un-Christlike. It makes me mad.

Is the mentor refusing to work with your ADD? Grr.

I am pretty excited when I get a load of laundry washed and hung/dried the same day.

Quote:
Originally Posted by gabysmom617 View Post
Yeah, I can imagine, being that I was 6 month pregnant lady climbing up on a picnic cooler trying to get into a window while my 3yo stood outside and watched in amusement, when the cooler fell away, and my legs got stuck/hooked in the window, and scraped my legs all the way down, almost fell and broke my neck, had to make efforts to fall so that I wouldn't fall on my big swole stomach.
Some things are on autopilot now. Like, it physically doesn't feel right to me to lock the door going out unless my keys are in my hand at the same time.

But typing is so weird these last few days. I keep leaving out whole words and whole phrases in my sentences. I usually love writing in message boards. But I feel like such a dunce, it's not working.
I can forget what I'm saying in the middle of a sentence. I hate it!
I never ock doors without knowing exactly where my keys are, having just visually check at I'm standing in front of it, etc. And I haven't locked myself out of my car in over two years or our apartment!

Did you know that if you have a remote starter, it works over the phone? Just hold it close to the phone on the other end and click it and hold the phone by the car.

Oh my word, I'm sorry but that mental image of pregnant woman stuck had me :

[QUOTE=heidirk;12331934]Oh, my goodness, yes! And the first time it caused me a real emotional crisis, because I had things under control before that, and suddenly it was, I'm-sticking-milk-in-the-pantry-and-salting-my-coffee kind of a deal. I locked myself out of my house no less than three times while preggo with DS. Can you imagine an 8 mos peggo woman up on a ladder prying open the screen on her kitchen window? I split my pants crawling in, too! /QUOTE]
Ugh, twice I've turned the wrong burner on and melted something. Twice!

Quote:
Originally Posted by PrennaMama View Post
The feeling that accompanied my diagnosis of ADHD 15 years ago (when I was about 18) is the same feeling that accompanied being diagnosed with asthma 7 years before that: "Oh, ok... well it explains a LOT, and I'm relieved. BUT, there is a certain view of people with this diagnosis, and that bugs me..."
Yup, ITA. I was very, very relieved when I read and self-diagnosed, I was failing classes and so frustrated that I could not self-motivate to attain my goals. It wasn't an excuse, but an explanation. My mom thought it was a cop-out then. Not sure what she thinks now.
Quote:
Originally Posted by PrennaMama View Post
I'm for redefining ADHD as a 'divergent mind-set'... or even as a different skill-set.
ITA, and I even mention later about ADD 'interfering' sigh, it's ingrained in us that we're not normal. Gag.
[QUOTE=PrennaMama;12332379]Then, while I was pregnant, there was no medicating of any kind, for me, and dh chose to go off his meds, citing the aggression he felt while medicated as a primary reason to be off them. His family was not pleased, and has made issue of his "unmedicated ADHD" ever since, specifically his dad.

[QUOTE=PrennaMama;12332379]Recently, dh and I hit rough patch. It was becoming more and more apparent to me that dh was suffering severe depression and anxiety, and he was loathe to get any help (having been theraputically burned by one's dad could do that I think) but we had reached critical mass. So he went to FIL and StepMIL to see if they might have colleagues to recommend (as they are both in the field). They did, he went, it was great. He's on Celexa (sp?) and quite proud of that... he tells everyone. "How you doing these days?" they ask... (for example his big sister); his reply: "GREAT! I'm on Celexa! And stuff that used to send me over the top just kind of bounces off, now... and I stopped hating myself!" He's had such a turn-around... It's like the man I married is back.

Quote:
Originally Posted by PrennaMama View Post
When asking after dh's "wellness" FIL and StepMIL constantly ask "So, what are you doing about the ADHD?" "When are you planning to treat the ADHD?" "What's his plan for the ADHD piece?" REALLY???? Seriously??? He's happy!!! He's GOOD. He might not ever do anything about the ADHD piece!! It just makes my head wanna

And now, dh is doing the same crap to me...

Sometimes, especially the first few weeks of school, I get a little addle-brained and forget things, lock the keys in the car, etc... Dh has been on me, recently, saying he thinks I need to medicate (with totally awesome side-notes about how ADHD meds will "help with your weight, too"). I am trying to be understanding that he has found renewed faith in the mental-health industry and medication; that he just wants to share that with me, is enthusiastic about it (like a born-again). But, suddenly, I find myself in doubt... should I medicate? Is there something wrong? And I feel like that adolescent girl again, suddenly unsure of my identity, tho I've felt such strong convictions regarding how I manage my ADHD for so long; wondering if I'm missing out on maximizing my potential via medication, or robbing dd of a more "together" mama........

I mean, I feel pretty together (if fact FIL once tried to tell me that he didn't believe I had ADHD... he wanted to know who diagnosed me, what were her credentials, etc... ). But I do forget things.
FIL isn't your dr. and DH should not discuss either of your medical (or not) choices, IMO. I'm glad the Celexa is helping. But yeesh, unless the ADD is still interfering, why worry. and if the meds caused anger issues, yikes, I wouldn't touch them.

I think, see bolded, that ILs have no respect for your boundaries/personal business. And DH is pushing on you, or it sounds like you feel he is. But then the fat comments, well, that is just uncalled for and unkind and make me mad for you. I mean, there are "things you do not say to your wife" and those are some of them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by PrennaMama View Post
Can't I just have a bad day?? I mean 'normal' people have them, too!
Heh, yup! Just come see us, we'll tell you you're fine!

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#187 of 582 Old 10-09-2008, 12:29 AM
 
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My mom thought it was a cop-out then. Not sure what she thinks now.
My mom also thought (and after some wine, still thinks) ADD is a myth.... a cop-out.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Maggirayne View Post
FIL isn't your dr. and DH should not discuss either of your medical (or not) choices, IMO. I'm glad the Celexa is helping. But yeesh, unless the ADD is still interfering, why worry. and if the meds caused anger issues, yikes, I wouldn't touch them.
Right? The ADHD just isn't his issue, right now; and his therapist (another ADHD Specialist) specifically chose Celexa as it's an searonin reuptake inhibitor and works well for folks with multiple issues, like ADHD and depression. I haven't been giev an opportunity since the last time they asked, but I'm ready should they again... I want to respond:"What is your concern, really? In our home, in our life, ADHD is not a problem to us, and we're managing fine. But it seems to be a major source of concern for you, so what is it exactly that you're concerned about?"

Quote:
Originally Posted by Maggirayne View Post
<snip>ILs have no respect for your boundaries/personal business. And DH is pushing on you, or it sounds like you feel he is. But then the fat comments, well, that is just uncalled for and unkind and make me mad for you. I mean, there are "things you do not say to your wife" and those are some of them.

<snip>Just come see us, we'll tell you you're fine!
Girl! Thank you so much!! I don't know how to express my gratitude... seriously. I have never in my entire life felt as understood as I just did reading your reply... I have a lump in my throat. You're right. They really have very little respect for dh at all, and only slightly more for me, as I'm not actually theirs, so they still put on airs a little.

As for dh's comments about my weight... I've lost 40 lbs in the last year, and have kept it off, but I still remain plus-sized. I am conscious about my weight, and always a little worried about trying to lose more, but in no big hurry. When he says stuff like that, I believe it comes from a place of support, like trying to come up with ideas to help me with something he knows I would like to accomplish. He was raised by people who did that to him, and doesn't realize (until I tell him straight out) that it's not really something I want or need to hear. When he says stuff like "Do you really need a dessert, honey?" I dead-eye him and say, "Do you really need to say anything to me about my food choices? I'm the one who has lost 40 lbs, while you have gained 45... who here should be worrying about what they eat?" Either that or I jokingly point out that one of the perks of being a grown up is that I can eat whatever I want, and no one can stop me... I could eat gum off the ground if I wanted...

I just realized, typing this, that I have never (even in therapy) felt that I had anyone to talk to about what life is like for me, and for us, and the situation with his family (which is embarassingly toxic for one whose entering the mental health, family therapy field).

I feel valididated, and I appreciate your input very much... Thank you. Thank you, ladies, for this thread...
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#188 of 582 Old 10-09-2008, 10:52 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Wow! SO much to respond to!

Welcome Prennamomma! Nice to have you join us!
And hello to Mommabohl! We're happy to provide you a place to fit in!


Prennamomma- I wanted to say I very much liked your reference to ADD/ADHD being a 'divergent mind-set' I think I'd combine your two terms, and call it a 'divergent skill-set'! It really is. There are things I can do, that 'normals' can't do, and I can do them specifically because I have ADD- Like store massive amounts of seemingly unconnected information! It doesn't matter to me if it's not exactly relevant to my life at the moment, I can connect it up later. Most people, in order to learn something, it has to have something to connect to immediately, or it can't be integrated. That's why school works for lots of people, but not US. We don't really need all the background, if you give us the whole picture, we are entirely capable of sorting it out later! We just process info differently, and can do different things with it.

I also liked this question-
"Do any of you think about your diagnosis as you would a diagnosis of any other imbalance or ailment? So may folks still perceive ADHD as a defect... a defficiency (Attention Defficit), that it seems difficult for some to bridge the gap between imbalance and imperfection."

I guess I do think of it that way, but maybe I think of all of my 'diagnosis' the same way- just something special about me that means I need to take care of myself in certain ways. I don;t see it as a defect, just as something that m,akes me different. And what earns us label of different is totally controlled by our environment. If I lived in Mexico, I'd be fine- It's totally acceptable to be hyper speedy for a period of time, and then everyone takes a nap! Maybe that's why I do so well with toddlers!

It's interesting you had a different effect from the preggo hormones than me and gaby'smom did. Hhmmmm......... Not that mine got any better after DS came, but it definately started in early pregnancy.

I'm so glad your husband's doing better. . .I wish they made a medication for responsibility- I'd give it to MY DH. Your IL's seem. . . frustrating. I don't even talk to mine about my ADD, they have a hard time accepting that I need to eat protein every few hours or I get very very cranky! They already think of me as high maintainance. . .: Oh yeah, Ritalin caused major rages for me, too! I will be open to a serotonin reuptake inhibitor if I get PPD this time around. Last time was a hell I do not ever want to experience again.


So- what is is with us and keys anyway? Remember when I lost my keys for like a month, Maggirayne? Oh, my. . . I repeatedly ask DH as we're going out the door, "You have your keys, right?" He's learned to just show them to me, or I keep asking. He's quite understanding about it actually. And as for getting stuck in the window, it's good my house is old, and has very tall windows, or I'd have been out of luck.

Maggirayne- Hi! You asked if my mentor was 'not dealing' with my ADD. SHe is, but my senior pastor sees it as a cop out. He just does not understand. The absolutely hysterical part about that is that I'd bet my last dollar that his WIFE has ADD. She and I trying to have a conversation is like two ships passing in the night. I recongized the whole 'drifting off' thing so I can't be offended, but I wonder how he doesn';t see the similarities? Course, when it's someone you're that close to, you just kind of accept it as part of them, and don't notice it anymore. I will have to educate Him!

No, my mentor has responded by micromanaging. : I'll be setting some boundaries when we pick up our meetings again. She means well, but I'm not an idiot.


gaby'smom- hey, girly, don't get so down on yourself, we make some awesome typo's here, or haven't you noticed that my hyphens are often semicolons! Noone's grading your work- just join us, and say what you need to say! And for pete's sake, don't go editing your work and stressing yourself out! I've also had quite a few of those 'mouth-hanging-open' moments this PG, and at first it really bothered me. Then I told myslef, 'you know what?, this is me, and if they can't handle me, than I don't need their opinion!' God made me this way, and I have a lot to offer, so I refuse to be embarassed about it!


AAM- just for a moment, I fell and sprained my ankle! Geesh, do I have to be a clutz on top of everything else? And my friend's son is sick, so she can't watch DS today for my appointments. DH finally sadi, 'look, why don't I just stay home?' cause there's no way I could cart a cranky from no nap toddler around to three appointments with a gimpy ankle, and borderline blood pressure! I'd be a complete, bawling-in-a-heap-on-the-floor mess!


Here's to another exciting day! :

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#189 of 582 Old 10-09-2008, 11:07 AM
 
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its nice to read your posts .
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#190 of 582 Old 10-09-2008, 11:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi back!

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#191 of 582 Old 10-09-2008, 12:50 PM
 
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So, I think I've found a group of women who might understand me!! YEA! I haven't read the entire thread yet, but what I have read I totally relate to! I have not been diagnosed w/ADD yet, but my aunt who has ADD says I have it, and it seems to run in the family. My dad has it too even though he won't admit it. It seems so obvious after reading some of the threads, and I finally believe my Aunt's diagnosis. I too suffer from really bad anxiety, and have had depression before. The anxiety when it gets bad enough turns into the depression it seems. The only meds I'm currently taking are lorazipam for the anxiety. I've been on SSRIs before and I hate them, and they were harder to get off of when I was pregnant them the supposed addictive meds (lorazipam). Having this self diagnosis is difficult because I don't quite know what to do with it yet.
Anyway I also wanted to add some other ways that I can relate before this gets to long. I too have a really hard time getting things done around the house, and the thought of what I have to do is just to daunting, so I don't do anything and that just makes things worse. Also, I get so frustrated when I clean and then things are a mess the next day, because I hate cleaning!!!! I feel the only reason I've gotten better at it is because of the societal pressure placed on mothers to have a nice clean home, and I babysit for my friends daughter so I feel an obligation there to keep my house a little neater at least on the first floor, the second floor is a mess. I also will forget mid sentence what I'm talking about or I won't be able to think of a word I need to use mid sentence and then I totally will lose my point because I can't think of the word. I'm also really forgetful sometimes, it was the worst when I was pregnant, and again it seems to be getting better. But sometimes I feel that things are getting better as far as my ADD symptoms because I'm a sahm and life just seems simpler now then when I was working. The only reason I'm currently worried about having this treated is because I'm going to school to be a Waldorf teacher, and I am really going to need to learn how to mulitask, and organize better or I'm going to have a really hard time being a teacher. Thanks for giving me a place to ramble. -Nicole

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#192 of 582 Old 10-14-2008, 07:49 PM
 
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sonrisa- What is dexedrine? Isn't that a stimulant/weightloss drug? Any scary side effects?
It is a stimulant and it was used as a weight loss drug during the 1970's. Most of the drugs used to treat ADD/ADHD are stimulants. I've tried Ritalin and it doesn't work for me. Dexedrine works to clear that fog and helps me focus and get things done.
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#193 of 582 Old 10-17-2008, 06:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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High All!

No I haven't dropped off the face of the Earth, I just had my baby!!! :

Milo Wallace, born October 10, 2008, at 6:15pm. He weighed 8lbs, 12.7 oz.s, and was 20.5 inches long. He's nursing well, with the help of a sheild.


I'll probably post later!

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#194 of 582 Old 10-18-2008, 06:23 PM
 
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Congrats! : :

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#195 of 582 Old 10-19-2008, 07:43 PM
 
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High All!

No I haven't dropped off the face of the Earth, I just had my baby!!! :

Milo Wallace, born October 10, 2008, at 6:15pm. He weighed 8lbs, 12.7 oz.s, and was 20.5 inches long. He's nursing well, with the help of a sheild.


I'll probably post later!
I love the name you picked! Milo was on my baby name list, so was Marlo and Mateo, and Jonah, and Quinby etc. We went to the hospital with the name Jonah decided upon, but when we seen him, he was a "Mateo" We call him "Tao" for short. He was 10 lbs and born march 30th 08.

You little guy was pretty big too, is everything going well? Do you have help?

Congrats on your new little!
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#196 of 582 Old 10-19-2008, 08:30 PM
 
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I was dxed about 4 years ago in the 98% range with ADHD.

It has been a blessing and a curse my whole life.

I have never been medicated, but have fantisized being on something and being "normal"

Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#197 of 582 Old 10-20-2008, 02:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I was dxed about 4 years ago in the 98% range with ADHD.

It has been a blessing and a curse my whole life.

I have never been medicated, but have fantisized being on something and being "normal"
Normal is relative. In fact, our lifestyle is very abnormal in most of the rest of the world! Even when I was 'on something' I was never very close to most people's idea of normal.

Welcome!


Pumkincat- Thanks! In the hospital, I thought for a second that maybe he was a Moses instead of a Milo, but I really never liked the biblical Moses. He was too much of a whiner and a wuss for me! So Milo it is. It supposed to mean 'mild or peaceful' which I didn't know when I picked it, but I sure could use some peace hereabouts!

I like Mateo, but DH's name is Matthew, so that was not an option! (stubborn husbandperson!)

Things are going pretty well. No real crying jags or anything. Today is the first day I don't have help, and it's going ok-ish. Milo had to cry for a few minutes while I got DS1 down for a nap, but he needs his nap so badly, it wass just not an option to quit! I don't feel quite as frantic when Milo cries as I did with DS. I guess I just have some momma practice? I dunno.

I'll have to get him used to the mei-tai, so far, he hasn't been very happy in it. I actually ran the dishwasher! I'm making myself play/rest while both the boys are sleeping, I don't see any other way to stay sane, really!

Oooh, I forgot- yes, he's nice sized, but he seems like a peanut to me, b/c DS1 was 9lbs 5 ozs! DS1 was long and lanky, and Milo is a tiny pudgeball! He's so snuggable! Your new LO is a10 pounder! Wow!

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#198 of 582 Old 10-21-2008, 12:01 AM
 
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Oh my, Elisabeth was 6 lbs 7 oz! I can't imagine a baby that big! He sounds like he's cuddly tho'!

Hi Angelbee! I've seen you around a lot. And I love your siggy.

Mama to 2 year old and :: June 14th!
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#199 of 582 Old 10-22-2008, 08:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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bumpity bump!

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#200 of 582 Old 10-22-2008, 08:42 PM
 
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I was dxed about 4 years ago in the 98% range with ADHD.

It has been a blessing and a curse my whole life.

I have never been medicated, but have fantisized being on something and being "normal"
Oh hi Angelbee, welcome to our funhouse! And hello to everyone else.

OMG. Someone please focus me. Like right now.

I am child-free tonight, and I planned to take the opportunity to get caught up on the housework.

So far, my house looks like crap still. But I have managed to make cat toys out of old baby socks and catnip, I have distributed some TP to the bathroom upstairs, and have searched endlessly for the plug for my iPod.

The kids will be home in 5 hours and I feel like that is too soon for me to get things done.

AAAAACCCCKKKK! Here I am complaining about being distracted and not getting anything done but being on this stupid computer is not helping!!

ETA::: The cats tore holes in the baby socks in a matter of 5 minutes and there is catnip all over my kitchen floor. So much for being clever

I want to find my iPod plug so I can listen to some tunes! Music helps me block out distractions and helps me focus.
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#201 of 582 Old 10-23-2008, 04:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh, Honeydee!! A woman after my own heart! At least you did something nice for your cats!

I have had this exact problem, as in, "OK, I have this huge chunk of time, and ten things to do, where do I start?" and I end up getting nothing done. Or at least not enough to justify the time I spent!



I have actually done some laundry today, and while the boys are asleep, I need to write thank you cards. So what do I do? I sit down at the computer to see how everyone else is doing!


Oh, my. . . well, off I go then!

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#202 of 582 Old 10-23-2008, 11:20 PM
 
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Hmmm.... I think I might belong here.

Not diagnosed, but WOW do I get what you're saying. Just yesterday, I had an important meeting at 6. I spent the whole week whining about it because yesterday was DH's birthday, and it meant we couldn't go out to dinner - that I'd have to cook.

So DH gets home, we start putzing around, and I say "hey, we've got all this time now! Dinner won't be ready until 7:30, let's go do something!"........... and miss the meeting.

Unreal.

I also constantly forget things, and am on the anxiety side of this - I'll freak out about something for a long time, and instead of getting things done I'll just obsess.

I'm going to finish reading everything. I'm very interested in vitamins/supplements. How did you guys figure out what this was?

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#203 of 582 Old 10-23-2008, 11:54 PM
 
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Hey there Sara!

Well, I can completely relate to your post.

How did I figure out how I had this and what exactly it was? Well, it all began with this thread that I started last year.

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=827848

This was the start of me seeking a diagnosis. The funny thing is, I had never really considered it seriously until I spoke to my therapist about it. I told her that I had read Driven to Distraction so I could learn how to deal with my DH (who has ADD) and when I went through the checklist of symptoms and stuff I think I could answer yes to about 90% of them. So I said to her, "You know, I don't know if I buy it. I mean, doesn't everyone operate this way?" And she stifled a giggle and said, "Nope."

OH. And the lightbulb went on and the door opened to the wonderful world of "what do I do with myself now that I have learned that the executive centers of my brain don't work right?"
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#204 of 582 Old 10-24-2008, 12:05 AM
 
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Wow, honeydee. We're kindred spirits.

Here's a list off one of the sites I googled after reading your post.

Some symptoms of ADHD but not commonly described in articles about ADHD include:

* Hypersensitivity to noise, touch, and smell
* Low feeling of self-worth
* Easily overwhelmed
* Hypersensitive to criticism
* Poor sense of time – often runs late
* Starts projects but can’t seem to finish them
* Takes on too much
* Difficulty remembering names
* Says things without thinking, often hurting others’ feelings
* Appears self-absorbed
* Poor math and/or writing skills
* Doesn’t seem to hear what others are saying
* Addictive behaviors: shopping, eating
* Problems with word retrieval
* Poor handwriting
* Difficulty with boring, repetitive tasks
* Thinks things over and over
* Difficulty making decisions
* Clumsy, poor coordination
* Tires easily or conversely, can’t sit still
* Has problems falling asleep and difficulty waking up the next morning

DEFINITELY that last one. Which is why it's 11 and I'm still up.

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#205 of 582 Old 10-24-2008, 01:08 AM
 
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Wow, honeydee. We're kindred spirits.

Here's a list off one of the sites I googled after reading your post.

Some symptoms of ADHD but not commonly described in articles about ADHD include:

* Hypersensitivity to noise, touch, and smell
* Low feeling of self-worth
* Easily overwhelmed
* Hypersensitive to criticism
* Poor sense of time – often runs late
* Starts projects but can’t seem to finish them
* Takes on too much
* Difficulty remembering names
* Says things without thinking, often hurting others’ feelings
* Appears self-absorbed
* Poor math and/or writing skills
* Doesn’t seem to hear what others are saying
* Addictive behaviors: shopping, eating
* Problems with word retrieval
* Poor handwriting
* Difficulty with boring, repetitive tasks
* Thinks things over and over
* Difficulty making decisions
* Clumsy, poor coordination
* Tires easily or conversely, can’t sit still
* Has problems falling asleep and difficulty waking up the next morning

DEFINITELY that last one. Which is why it's 11 and I'm still up.
You know, there's a Nocturnal Mama's Tribe around here too. You could always check that out as well . BTW, where did you come up with your user name?

Oh! Word retrieval! I forgot about that. I'd like to think that I am an articulate person, but I cannot make the thought and my hand/mouth connect. It's really weird. My thoughts, especially on something intellectual are crystal clear, but to get them out of my head is pointless sometimes. I will rarely post anything in debate form in Politics because I know what I want to say but I cannot articulate it. I feel like there is a brick right in the center of my forehead when I need to say something.

I can't sit still either.

You know what would be funny? To see what would happen if all of us were in the same room together. We would probably invent a revolutionary idea that the world has never heard of before but walk out completely bruised from walking into each other so much because we can't sit still.
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#206 of 582 Old 10-24-2008, 01:18 AM
 
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You know, there's a Nocturnal Mama's Tribe around here too. You could always check that out as well . BTW, where did you come up with your user name?

Oh! Word retrieval! I forgot about that. I'd like to think that I am an articulate person, but I cannot make the thought and my hand/mouth connect. It's really weird. My thoughts, especially on something intellectual are crystal clear, but to get them out of my head is pointless sometimes. I will rarely post anything in debate form in Politics because I know what I want to say but I cannot articulate it. I feel like there is a brick right in the center of my forehead when I need to say something.

I can't sit still either.

You know what would be funny? To see what would happen if all of us were in the same room together. We would probably invent a revolutionary idea that the world has never heard of before but walk out completely bruised from walking into each other so much because we can't sit still.
Gee, honeydee, THANKS. Give me YET ANOTHER reason to be addicted to MDC. Have you seen my join date and post count? And I've had at least 2 jobs at the same time, was pregnant, and now have a baby and am STILL posting here.

I used to walk down the hallways in high school reading a book and never run into anyone. In normal life? BAM! BANG! I swear, all our animals say to themselves "Uh oh, that little owner is up again! Get out of the way!" They watch me like a hawk.

Oh man, I just go down in flames over in Politics, but I can't help myself. I can't tell you how many threads have been closed because I've said something, people have picked things apart, and it's become a total flame-war. And I'm on the sidelines going "wait! not what i meant! aack!"

Oh, my username? Long story, actually. My nickname in high school was SMO. I had an LLBean backpack with my initials monogrammed across the back - SMO. It stuck through college, and when I got married, DH (to be a butt-head ) started calling me SME. You know - like the pirate from Hook? Smee? So I came up with smeisnotaipirate. Can we say crazy connections? Everything in my life has a weird, convoluted story like that.

I do that stuff all the time. DH's AIM name, which I picked out, is organeiser. Our last name is "Eiser" and he plays the organ. So he's an organeiser. Organizer.

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#207 of 582 Old 10-24-2008, 01:32 AM
 
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I used to walk down the hallways in high school reading a book and never run into anyone. In normal life? BAM! BANG! I swear, all our animals say to themselves "Uh oh, that little owner is up again! Get out of the way!" They watch me like a hawk.

Oh man, I just go down in flames over in Politics, but I can't help myself. I can't tell you how many threads have been closed because I've said something, people have picked things apart, and it's become a total flame-war. And I'm on the sidelines going "wait! not what i meant! aack!"
Oh my god, I think you are my twin.

I walk into stuff all the time. I step on my cats, my toddler (well they're underfoot I can't help it). I hurt myself on a regular basis. I hurt others on a regular basis. I have no spatial awareness at all. I suggested to my husband that he wear a cup when he's around me .

Do you ever feel like you could just : people all the time in Politics because they said it so much better than you could ever dream of? I do.
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#208 of 582 Old 10-24-2008, 01:42 AM
 
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Oh my god, I think you are my twin.

I walk into stuff all the time. I step on my cats, my toddler (well they're underfoot I can't help it). I hurt myself on a regular basis. I hurt others on a regular basis. I have no spatial awareness at all. I suggested to my husband that he wear a cup when he's around me .

Do you ever feel like you could just : people all the time in Politics because they said it so much better than you could ever dream of? I do.
Oh, absolutely.

I am SO enjoying this thread. This really makes me feel so... ok about myself. The cheer and camaraderie is great.

ETA: I've been wondering if I've got PPD recently. It makes a LOT of sense within ADD now.

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#209 of 582 Old 10-24-2008, 01:56 AM
 
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Oh, absolutely.

I am SO enjoying this thread. This really makes me feel so... ok about myself. The cheer and camaraderie is great.

ETA: I've been wondering if I've got PPD recently. It makes a LOT of sense within ADD now.

Oh, I'm so glad you found us! It's so nice to fit in somewhere, YK?

I'd look into the PPD thing for sure. I noticed that the ADHD stuff I had going on just seemed completely out of control around 3 months post partum with my last baby. That is when I seriously started wondering WTH was up with me. Those hormones will make you nuts.

Well, good night everyone. I'm going to attempt sleeping now.
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#210 of 582 Old 10-24-2008, 02:09 AM
 
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honeydee, yes. That's about when it all came to a head. DH came home one day and I shoved the baby into his arms (screaming, of course) and just rocked myself in the corner of our bedroom. I'm usually so rock-steady that these feelings of utter lack of control are just so strange. Ugh. That means I need to find a doctor.

You guys were talking about births, etc, a little while back. I had a birth worse than my "worst fear" birth I had to write out in my birthing class. I don't feel like looking it up now, but it's in the birth stories under "Tobias Benjamin" if you're interested. Luckily, it hasn't affected my bonding with him - he's such a sweet and special little guy.

I think that's what this PPD or whatever is from, and I'm wondering if it's aggravating the ADD. Stress just makes things worse for me, and I've noticed that since Toby was born, I don't sleep well, sleep for long periods of time and don't feel rested, forget more appointments, and my number 1 problem - I obsess about how much time I have left to do stuff, and it'll be 10am and I have to be at a meeting at 3pm, and I'll start freaking out that I can't start anything because I won't have time to finish before I have to go. Little things, like laundry or cleaning the bathroom.

heidirk, are you in my neck of the woods? I totally forgot if it was you or someone else. If so, let me know if you need help with your LO.

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