What is the worst/dumbest thing anyone has ever said to you about parenting stuff? II - Mothering Forums
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Parenting > What is the worst/dumbest thing anyone has ever said to you about parenting stuff? II
sapphire_chan's Avatar sapphire_chan 02:15 AM 03-29-2008
I this topic, so here's a shiny new, non-server killing, thread. Everybody try to pay attention so we can start a new one at 500 posts or so next time and not break MDC.

The last topic from the old thread was on relatives claiming the baby as "theirs".

Sorry, I don't have anything myself yet, to really start this off properly.

kater07's Avatar kater07 02:26 AM 03-29-2008
Thanks for starting the new thread. I was going to do it and saw yours.

Last week, I was at a birthday party. A mom told me that she thinks her DD's immunity to her brother's strep-throat was stronger b/c she got 6 shots the day before he started to be ill. She said something like, it was only 6 shots but it was like 10 or so vaccines, so I know that's what made her immune to his strep throat.


sapphire_chan's Avatar sapphire_chan 02:40 AM 03-29-2008
Quote:
Originally Posted by kater07 View Post
Thanks for starting the new thread. I was going to do it and saw yours.

Last week, I was at a birthday party. A mom told me that she thinks her DD's immunity to her brother's strep-throat was stronger b/c she got 6 shots the day before he started to be ill. She said something like, it was only 6 shots but it was like 10 or so vaccines, so I know that's what made her immune to his strep throat.

For all the government's work in trying to convince people to vax, they certainly do a lousy job of educating people on how vaxes are supposed to work.
amberskyfire's Avatar amberskyfire 06:56 AM 03-29-2008
My MIL does the "my grandbaby" thing, too. My husband and I moved to Hawaii from Texas a few years ago and when I got pregnant in June, she freaked out and got really mad at my husband for being "so irresponsible." Um hello? We've been married EIGHT YEARS! She wouldn't talk to us for two months and then when she finally did speak to us again, she said she was mad because we had moved so far away and we were "keeping her grandbaby from her."

She's MY baby, not hers! :
beachmommy5's Avatar beachmommy5 10:09 AM 03-29-2008
Comming out of lurkdom to say my mil is the same way, this is "her" grandbaby and she is so excited about "her" litle girl comming blah blah blah, she was the same way with ds and it drives me nuts! She actually went so far last pregnancy as to thank me for taking pre-natal vitamins and growing "her" such a healthy baby. Give me a break.
In Exile's Avatar In Exile 03:47 PM 03-29-2008
Oh, I remembered a good one from being pregnant...

We have friends that love to play at a local bar, open mike night. Happens to be one of the last great dive bars with loooots of smoke. So, she said to me, oh, that's too bad, I would have loved for you guys to play with us, but it's such a smoked filled place...
Her husband heard that and "educated" her right away: "Honey, the baby is in her belly, there's no way the baby could get hurt".
Right...

Oh, by the way, she is a teacher in primary school...

But aside from that blooper nothing else came...
Pastrydemon's Avatar Pastrydemon 04:08 PM 03-29-2008
It always irked me a bit when DH's extended family would comment on DD's speedy running, etc. by asking if DH was athletic....huh? No? Then where did that come from (*ahem* -- me maybe?) My stupid MIL even asked "where DD's lovely blue eyes came from. DUH! Looking right at you!
annettemarie's Avatar annettemarie 05:21 PM 03-29-2008
Thanks so much for starting the new thread, and for doing it with good grace!
butterfly_mommy's Avatar butterfly_mommy 06:04 PM 03-29-2008
I had some great ones Last weekend from my grandmother

She asked me if I ever put my DS down and leave him to cry for a bit

Then she asked my mom when DH and I left to go to the store "Do they ever put him down?" My mom said "Mom, It's called attachment parenting so they try to have him in arms as much as possible" GM said "well in my day they told us to leave them in the crib to cry" My mom replies "Yeah and that is why we are all screwed up"

Another great one

GM "how long are you going to BF Julian for?"
Me "Well, I want to try child led weaning, right now I feel comfortable going till he is three but who knows maybe if he isn't ready to wean at three I can go longer"
GM making a scrunched up face "Oh, I don't like that"
My mom "Well you don't have to drink it"
Me "But you could if you want to"
GM looking shocked "Oh no thank you":

Then my GM is telling us how great my aunt's kids are, she has 5 that she natural parented including child led weaning with one of her daughters BF till 5. I turn to her and say "See that's what Attachment parenting and extended BF gets you"

My GM was always giving my aunt, her daughter, a hard time about parenting and she still doesn't get it! :
Bkwyrm's Avatar Bkwyrm 07:37 PM 03-29-2008
I finally told my MIL that if she'd be giving birth to the baby, it would be hers. Otherwise, it's my kid.

What's weird is that after fifteen years of bugging us to have a baby (DH and have been together a long time!), we got around to doing so. My MIL was over the moon about Fish's birth, came to visit a few times (she lives about an hour away), and then her mom got sick and died and....nothing. She saw Fish at Christmas, when we brought her out there, and she'll come to the baby's first birthday party, next month. After all that fuss, after making me CRAZY telling me what to do and how to do it......no interest in the kid at all. Weird!
nolonger's Avatar nolonger 09:12 PM 03-29-2008
We should cut my mother a bit of slack for being at that stage of pre-Alzheimer's where she gets mean when she's confused, but when she asked if Terran was "my great-grandchild" it kind of got to me; I composed a very carefully worded email reply explaining that 19yodd and 16yods simply weren't ready to be parents yet and that dd at least had put a lot of thought into her decision to postpone marriage and family until after college and a start in her career, but that I had no doubt that if she took good care of herself and "stuck around Hotel Life" a bit longer she would, indeed, live to see another generation of her descendants.

I was FURIOUS when I got back the one word reply of "Whew!"

He ain't your grandchild either, you mean old bat! The grandchildren you already have hate you so much they refuse to even use the overpriced gifts you send them, much less speak to you, and you know nothing about who they are and what they're interested in now that you can't control them any more. If I had known how easy it would be to protect my children from you three babies ago you wouldn't know about ANY of them!

/ rant over

Yea, but I love her anyway, even when she tells me that her dog is "like the daughter I never had", I just have to protect my youngest from her.
Odin's Avatar Odin 12:37 AM 03-30-2008
It was on Easter,and it's basically my DH and his family telling me that taking my DS to DH's Grandma's house (which every one that was there were smoking in, 9 people, I think) wouldn't hurt my DS (that is 2 months old almost). They said, it'll just be real quick, and then you can leave. I said NO WAY!!! And now DH's family thinks I'm even more of a bitch now.
big-mama's Avatar big-mama 12:52 AM 03-30-2008
Someone told DH "let the baby cry, its good for his lungs". He won't tell me who said it though. I think he is afraid I will chew out whoever said it and embarrass him. Its nauseating that some people believe this garbage.
NewMama2007's Avatar NewMama2007 12:56 AM 03-30-2008
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastrydemon View Post
It always irked me a bit when DH's extended family would comment on DD's speedy running, etc. by asking if DH was athletic....huh? No? Then where did that come from (*ahem* -- me maybe?) My stupid MIL even asked "where DD's lovely blue eyes came from. DUH! Looking right at you!
This bothers me soooo much! Every trait is something that can be explained away by something on DH's side. I have bright blue eyes, so does DD, but she got them from DH's second cousin. My biological father has red hair, but she gets it from some distant uncle. :::

I feel like I was just the oven for this child that belongs to DH's side 100 percent!
FREEmom1120's Avatar FREEmom1120 01:02 AM 03-30-2008
It's really weird but my MIL is the opposite. DD is the spitting image of dh, but she always says she looks like me. It's so strange because I thought she'd be all about saying she looked like dh no matter what.

I HATE when people say a baby looks like anyone other than the mother or father though.
NewMama2007's Avatar NewMama2007 01:03 AM 03-30-2008
We went to DH's grandmothers' house for Easter. We were all sitting in the living room talking about how we would NEVER give a child something to eat without asking their parents first. DH's grandmother is a kniving and manipulative woman, and while we were all talking, she picked up DD and went into the kitchen. I followed closely after, because I had an inkling what she was up to - she had given DD a WHOLE animal cracker ( I thought she was going to give her meat though - she knows we don't eat meat!), which DD shoved in her mouth and started to choke on.

DH's grandma's response? "Oh, she just needs to learn how to eat".

NO, she needs to grow a bigger mouth and more teeth in order to chew up that huge cracker! DH came in and saw my death look, took DD, and we started digging chunks of animal cracker out of her mouth. Then the crazy old bat tried to give her another one! We scooted after that.
NewMama2007's Avatar NewMama2007 01:05 AM 03-30-2008
Quote:
Originally Posted by Odin View Post
It was on Easter,and it's basically my DH and his family telling me that taking my DS to DH's Grandma's house (which every one that was there were smoking in, 9 people, I think) wouldn't hurt my DS (that is 2 months old almost). They said, it'll just be real quick, and then you can leave. I said NO WAY!!! And now DH's family thinks I'm even more of a bitch now.
Good for you for sticking to your guns! I flat out told my SIL that if she's been smoking, she can't hold DD. She asked why.
spmamma's Avatar spmamma 01:12 AM 03-30-2008
DH and I had met friends for dinner tonight and we were all standing outside the restaurant afterward. A lady looked at DD who was playing on the ground and said to me, "No socks?!"

We live in California. It was over 60 degrees out. She wasn't cold. I said, "It's okay."

Lady: "But it's cold. She should be wearing socks."
Me: "It's not cold. She's fine."


FREEmom1120's Avatar FREEmom1120 01:17 AM 03-30-2008
You don't get sick from cold feet anyway!!
amberskyfire's Avatar amberskyfire 01:19 AM 03-30-2008
Quote:
Originally Posted by FREEmom1120 View Post
I HATE when people say a baby looks like anyone other than the mother or father though.
This is funny because my baby looks absolutely nothing at all like me or my husband. She looks like nobody I've ever seen before. I always joke that I'm so glad I had her at home because if they had brought her to me in the hospital, I would have gone ballistic and told them to take it away and bring me my baby!
nolansmummy's Avatar nolansmummy 01:23 AM 03-30-2008
My mil does the same thing in regards to who the babes look like. She won't ever say dd or ds has one of my traits. The kids are tall, so she says to dh, "well your dad was tall", i'm like "hello, i'm 6'0, maybe they get it from ME!" Grr. Their hair color comes from some distant relative on dh's side, their eye color, everything. She just can't stand that the kids look so much like me. My son looks exactly like my younger brother, but apparantly he doesn't, he looks just like dh's great grandpas, uncles brothers , cousin or something. Its crazy.
minkajane's Avatar minkajane 01:50 AM 03-30-2008
Quote:
Originally Posted by FREEmom1120 View Post
I HATE when people say a baby looks like anyone other than the mother or father though.
That made me laugh because every time I show people a pic of me, DS, and DF, they start talking about how DS looks like DF. I've been with DF for 10 months - no, my 3-year-old is not his! People are always SO shocked.
FREEmom1120's Avatar FREEmom1120 02:01 AM 03-30-2008
Well that's different I think. Really sweet actually.

My MIL always says her dd looks like dd's aunt, and that dh looks like his cousin. They both look exactly like her.

I was prepared to be pissed when she told me my dd looked like some distant relative. Luckily it hasn't happened!
Dea's Avatar Dea 02:55 AM 03-30-2008
So far I've been pretty lucky and haven't had a lot of really irritating stuff to report. However I did call my mom to ask which vaccinations I was given as a child (all of them) and she made some off handed comment that "if you were smart you would get all of the inoculations you can". This irritated me becasue we were having a conversation about me learning about them and what they do and the affects. So if I were smart I would learn everything I could and then make an educated choice.
The conversation turned then to circumcision and she declared that uncirced men are gross, dirty and diseased. I corrected her and said that no, no and no, that an uncirced guy isn't any of those, and asked if that is what she thought of my DH.

So clearly my mother is not on board with my style of parenting.
aprilflowers's Avatar aprilflowers 03:09 AM 03-30-2008
I was told I should stop breastfeeding my 2 1/2 year old because he will remember it and resent me for allowing him to bf for so long.
MilkTrance's Avatar MilkTrance 03:31 AM 03-30-2008
MIL -- Oh, Baby's eyes are just so beautiful! What colour are they?
Me -- They're green.
MIL -- They look like they change colour with this clothes! Just like his Daddy! He must have his Daddy's eyes!
Me -- Baby has green eyes.
SIL -- MilkTrance, YOU have green eyes! I think he has your eyes!
MIL -- Colour changing eyes... just like his Daddy!


Smokering's Avatar Smokering 03:54 AM 03-30-2008
I'm sure this one's been said before, but it naively shocked me to hear it in real life (today, in fact):

Baby: [wails]
Me: I'll feed her in a minute, just got to get the cake out of the oven.
MIL: Maybe she's thirsty!
Me: Yeah, I'll feed her in a sec.
MIL: No, maybe she wants a drink of water.
[Baby is two weeks old]
Me: We don't give her water, just milk; I'll feed her in a second.
MIL: No, they get thirsty as well as hungry.
Me: Er, well, breastmilk is liquid...
MIL: No, they need to have water in between feeds, if they get thirsty.
Me: I'll feed her in a second...

*sigh*
LaurenB's Avatar LaurenB 04:07 AM 03-30-2008
Quote:
Originally Posted by Smokering View Post
I'm sure this one's been said before, but it naively shocked me to hear it in real life (today, in fact):

Baby: [wails]
Me: I'll feed her in a minute, just got to get the cake out of the oven.
MIL: Maybe she's thirsty!
Me: Yeah, I'll feed her in a sec.
MIL: No, maybe she wants a drink of water.
[Baby is two weeks old]
Me: We don't give her water, just milk; I'll feed her in a second.
MIL: No, they get thirsty as well as hungry.
Me: Er, well, breastmilk is liquid...
MIL: No, they need to have water in between feeds, if they get thirsty.
Me: I'll feed her in a second...

*sigh*
My mom is fixated on the idea that babies really want water. "I know when I'm thirsty I really want a glass of water! Milk isn't refreshing or thirst-quenching!" Good grief. It drives me crazy.
amberskyfire's Avatar amberskyfire 04:27 AM 03-30-2008
Quote:
Originally Posted by Smokering View Post

Baby: [wails]
Me: I'll feed her in a minute, just got to get the cake out of the oven.
MIL: Maybe she's thirsty!
Me: Yeah, I'll feed her in a sec.
MIL: No, maybe she wants a drink of water.
[Baby is two weeks old]
Me: We don't give her water, just milk; I'll feed her in a second.
MIL: No, they get thirsty as well as hungry.
Me: Er, well, breastmilk is liquid...
MIL: No, they need to have water in between feeds, if they get thirsty.
Me: I'll feed her in a second...

*sigh*
One of my clients said this to me a few days ago. She called to see how the baby and I were doing and every time she calls, she acts like my pediatrician and asks me a hundred questions about how I'm taking care of the baby (this woman doesn't even HAVE children and has never been around any). She's always asking how long the baby sleeps, how often, how often I'm feeding her, etc.

When she called a few days ago, she wanted to know if I was giving the baby (only 2 weeks old) water. I said no and she, utterly shocked, said "doesn't she ever get thirsty?"

Of course she does. My breast milk is made of saltine crackers, after all :
Smokering's Avatar Smokering 04:36 AM 03-30-2008
I know! It really threw me... I mean, what a weird thing to say. Baby kittens and puppies and so on don't drink water, do they? And we don't see them dehydrating all over the place. Plus, little Rowan isn't even back up to her birthweight yet--well, maybe she is, she's being weighed tomorrow--anyway she certainly isn't obese, so why would I want to fill her little tummy up with something which contains no nutrients or calories? Very odd...
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