I need a fast answer! HIV movie 2nd grade? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 112 Old 05-24-2008, 12:25 AM
 
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after reading the movie it is, i would definatly allow it.
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#62 of 112 Old 05-24-2008, 01:33 PM
 
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I would have no problem with my kids knowing about hiv. In second grade i knew what sex was and that it could result in pregnancies (in fact i thought it happened every time) and passing of illness. I probably didn't know about condoms, but it wouldn't have hurt me to know about them. Knowlege doesn't make children not innocent. I credit my parents' very open and no-nnonsense attitude towards sex with me waiting till my 20s to actually have sex (my friends were all haveing sex by age 15-16)

That said I imagine this film is not about sex but about tolerance.
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#63 of 112 Old 05-24-2008, 06:10 PM
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sad as it is, in this day and age there are still people who discriminate against others based on their HIV status. i would totally allow my son to watch a movie about HIV. yes, it is an STD but it is also something that is a major factor in the lives of those who have it. it's not all about sex. herpes doesn't really affect your identity that much and people won't refuse to give you jobs if they think your might have it. it's easily hidden and there's really no reason to tell anyone unless they're your doctor or you're sleeping with them. not so with HIV. for better or worse, it's something people talk about and know about. i think kids need to know what HIV is and what it isn't. at this point they don't need to know all about how to screen sexual partners but they do need to know that it's not scary to give someone with AIDS a hug. you know, liberals (of which i am not one) don't spend nearly as much time educating young people about HIV as they did when i was a child and hard core hate mongers and religious extremists (of which i am also not one) have only redoubled their efforts. they hear about it just living in our culture and i think some of us don't realize it because when we were kids in the 80's it was ALL we heard about.

also, they left the sex part out. that leaves it open for parents to discuss it if they wish or to let their children's awareness of AIDS as a primal rally STD develop naturally as they age and watch the news.
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#64 of 112 Old 05-24-2008, 08:11 PM
 
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I would say no and keep my child out of school for the day.
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#65 of 112 Old 05-24-2008, 08:15 PM
 
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I would have no problem with it, and fully support it.

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#66 of 112 Old 05-24-2008, 09:23 PM
 
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So are you going to see the movie first?

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#67 of 112 Old 05-24-2008, 10:44 PM
 
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Now that I see what the movie is, I am changing my answer to yes.
That seems perfectly reasonable for second grade...esp since (as pp's have pointed out) there may be students at the school who have it.

I did the blood sisters thing with several of my girlfriends when I was little (but I was only about 6)
I hadn't even thought about warning ds about not getting in contact with other people's blood. I get so many good ideas here!!!!


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#68 of 112 Old 05-24-2008, 11:48 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't think we're going to school that day. This is just one of those things that is what makes parenting so personal. I support everyone's decision for their own child, and I'm definitely glad this is out there for kids raised in super ignorant homes who hear awful things anyway.

That's all. I have no personal agenda against AIDS education. Far from it. I'm just saying it's one of many, many serious issues this world is facing, and I'm not trying to let him in on all of them as soon as possible. Also, the chance of my son swapping blood with someone who just happens to have a blood borne illness just doesn't seem very likely to me. That's all.

This all just makes me melancholy.

The "fast answer" in the title seems so silly now. No fast answers here.

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#69 of 112 Old 05-24-2008, 11:54 PM
 
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Considering the fact that my son knows at least one person who is HIV positive at the age of five, I would let him see it. It baffles me that anyone would even say no.
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#70 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 02:49 AM
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redebeth,

why does it make you sad?
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#71 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 05:25 AM
 
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I haven't read all the replies.

I really think it depends on your kid. I am pretty much with you about not having them worry unnecessarily at such a young age, and my older son is definitely a worrier. I don't hide things from him, and I don't lie to him, but I don't deliberately expose him to "scary" things either. If he asked me what AIDS was, I would tell him. But I see no reason to bring it up at this point.
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#72 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 05:54 AM
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I think its totally appropriate. My child will definatly know about AIDS/HIV well before he is 7 or 8. This would the case even if he did not have a family member with the disease.

It is a big thing to worry about and something that we should ALL have to be aware of.

There was an estimated 2.5 million children living with HIV/AIDS worldwide last year. How can you ignore something like that?

I think the video is a good step to breaking down stigma surrounding HIV/AIDS. I think, however, this should start *at home* at an earlier age.
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#73 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 10:47 AM
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I'll be blunt. I think that the people who are saying OH NOZ! OUR LITTLE ONEZ CANTZ BE EXPOSED TO THE EVIL HIV!

are actually hiding a great deal of bigotry towards their misinterpretation of the disease. It's a 'gay' disease, it's a 'sex' disease and sex is bad and immoral!

And that attitude makes me feel ill.
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#74 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 11:06 AM
 
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Originally Posted by ThreeBeans View Post
I'll be blunt. I think that the people who are saying OH NOZ! OUR LITTLE ONEZ CANTZ BE EXPOSED TO THE EVIL HIV!

are actually hiding a great deal of bigotry towards their misinterpretation of the disease. It's a 'gay' disease, it's a 'sex' disease and sex is bad and immoral!

And that attitude makes me feel ill.
I am not only ill but shocked because I suppose I live in my own little world where my kid's know quite a bit more than the average bear.

Do you guys listen to the news with your children around?

I keep the radio on NPR quite often. They know about the war going on and the realities of it beyond the ribbons on cars. I protect them from unnecessary evils but this doesn't seem like an evil to me. It's a reality. My oldest is almost six, he's not scared or depressed, he's just as happy and carefree as every other six year old boy he hangs out with. He just lives in the world with me.
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#75 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 11:31 AM
 
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I would have no problem with showing it. Accidents happen in gym class, sports, skinned bloody knee's at recess, etc. Kids should be taught WHY not to touch someone elses blood, and if they get it on them to immediately wash it off with hot soap and water.
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#76 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 02:00 PM
 
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Originally Posted by ThreeBeans View Post
I'll be blunt. I think that the people who are saying OH NOZ! OUR LITTLE ONEZ CANTZ BE EXPOSED TO THE EVIL HIV!

are actually hiding a great deal of bigotry towards their misinterpretation of the disease. It's a 'gay' disease, it's a 'sex' disease and sex is bad and immoral!

And that attitude makes me feel ill.
Oh Good Lord. That's not what I'm saying at all. I also don't make a point of bringing up drunk driving, war, murder, rape, cancer, heart failure or SIDS. If it comes up, we'll discuss it honestly. Until then, I'll follow his lead.

We've talked about sex, and we've had numerous discussion about families that have two mommies or two daddies, or one daddy or one mommy, or whatever. Sex and gay couples are nothing scary for him to be worried about. They are a healthy normal part of our world. From the very beginning we've discussed romantic love as two people who care deeply for each other. We discuss marriage in terms of two people, men or women. It's is a complete non issue in our household. HIV/AIDS is scary for even adults, and I don't see any reason that he needs to be exposed to it the age of 7.

Maybe for some people it's a sex or homophobic issue, but don't paint us all with the same brush. In our case you couldn't be further from the truth.
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#77 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 02:04 PM
 
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I am not only ill but shocked because I suppose I live in my own little world where my kid's know quite a bit more than the average bear.

Do you guys listen to the news with your children around?

I keep the radio on NPR quite often. They know about the war going on and the realities of it beyond the ribbons on cars. I protect them from unnecessary evils but this doesn't seem like an evil to me. It's a reality. My oldest is almost six, he's not scared or depressed, he's just as happy and carefree as every other six year old boy he hangs out with. He just lives in the world with me.
Yes, that's your child. Mine has terrifying nightmares about certain situations. Everything is "reality." The reality is someone could break into our house tonight and kill us all in our sleep, but that's not something I'm going to bring up unnecessarily.

And no, I don't listen to the news with my kids around. I don't listen to the news in general - I read it. If they ask, we discuss. If they need to know now, we discuss. For us, AIDS/HIV doesn't fit into either of these categories at the moment. (And I find most news to be fear mongering crap, so we choose not to have it our lives any more than necessary. We read to get the info we need.)
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#78 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 03:23 PM
 
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HIV/AIDS is scary for even adults, and I don't see any reason that he needs to be exposed to it the age of 7.
I havent read the whole thread...but for me, HIV isnt "scary"....its just a disease, one that can kill you if you dont get adequate treatment. I inquired about a child i saw on an Ohio adoption photolisting, who was HIV+, but he was adopted before i could find out more info. My first response wasnt "oohhh scary" but rather "oh, HIV, i think i could deal with that"...when i was growing up, "AIDS education" really hammered home that HIV is a death sentence...that isnt the case anymore, with proper health care. Its more of a chronic, manageable disease that kids are growing up with. There are babies who were HIV+ twenty years ago, who are now thriving as adults.

I dont know why talking about this disease would make someone very sad, or not want to expose their child to the information....i would just tell my child that its a disease you can get certain ways, that left untreated can kill you, but with treatment individuals can live long lives. And that you can't catch the disease from all the normal human interaction (hugging, kissing, touching etc) but that you should be sure never to share blood with someone because its not only HIV you can be exposed to.

I just dont get how thats scary.


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#79 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 03:47 PM
 
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You don't get how a disease that can kill you could be scary to a child? Kids aren't always rational. I've told ds a thousand times that little kids don't go to jail (and that I would never send him to jail - complete with discussions about how law enforcement and sentencing works), but every time I get mad at him for something he did "wrong" he gets all worried and says "Are you going to send me to jail?"

When the topic comes up, I will tell him pretty much what you said in your post. I just don't see the need to sit him down and show him a film about it at this particular time. When it's appropriate or relevant to him, we'll discuss it. I don't see why that's a big deal.
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#80 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 03:49 PM
 
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kids need to be exposed to the fact that its a scary disease because they could easily contract it from touching someones open wound on the playground! they need to be taught not to touch blood that isnt their own unless they have gloves on. I can't believe someone would bury their head in the sand and not teach their kids the safety aspects of this.
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#81 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 04:02 PM
 
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kids need to be exposed to the fact that its a scary disease because they could easily contract it from touching someones open wound on the playground! they need to be taught not to touch blood that isnt their own unless they have gloves on. I can't believe someone would bury their head in the sand and not teach their kids the safety aspects of this.
That's completely different than sitting kids down and showing them a movie. I can't speak for anyone else, but I'm not talking about refusing to discuss basic hygiene with my kids. We've already talked about why nurses/doctors wear gloves.
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#82 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 04:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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You know, I really wanted to give up on this thread because no one seemed to understand what I'm saying. I'm not a bigot, and I have no need or desire to try and prove that either.

Ocean baby seems to, though, so that is something.

When my son went to public school he became very germ fearing because of the teacher's attitude and all the purell everywhere. To this day, he will only share a drink with me, no one else. Forget food, or anything else. He knows all about germs and viruses. I hope he never takes microbiology because he will probably lose it completely. He has a tendency to take these things seriously.

When I listen to NPR in the car, my son has headphones on listening to the white stripes or something. I gave them for him for this purpose, because I don't let him listen to a lot of things reported on NPR.

This makes me sad because I didn't realize how many people seem to take pride in their children being exposed to 'more than the average bear'. My son is not sheltered, we deal with things as they come. Not when the school system dictates we should.

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#83 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 04:23 PM
 
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This makes me sad because I didn't realize how many people seem to take pride in their children being exposed to 'more than the average bear'. My son is not sheltered, we deal with things as they come. Not when the school system dictates we should.
It probably depends on how you were raised, your temperment, and your child's temperment. I imagine this is why teh school send the permission slip home. Different parents will go different ways on this.

I watched the news and listed to NPR with my parents from day one. I used to lie in bed at age 7 and imagine myself on crossfire convincing the opposing guest that the death penalty was wrong. At 8 I used to listen to Joan Baez songs (mabel joy was my favorite - about a prostitue and the georgia farm boy who fell in love with her and ended up getting shot - prison Trilogy was another favorite). It was a rich and wonderful childhood for me and I will provide the same for my children unless I see that tempermentally they can't handle seeing the world in all its complicated beauty and injustice at a young age.

It is fine if you don't want your son to see the movie. It is fine that the school is offering to show the movie.

Good luck.
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#84 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 04:39 PM
 
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You don't get how a disease that can kill you could be scary to a child?.
I was responding to this:

Quote:
HIV/AIDS is scary for even adults
Lots of things are scary for kids....the monster under the bed is scary, thunderstorms are scary.

But if a parent doesnt allow the child to see the film, and wants to protect them even from the idea of diseases, such as HIV,....dont you think when that kid goes to school the next day *someone* (another child) is going to mention it to him?! How are you going to protect him from *that*?

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#85 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 04:45 PM
 
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Ask around - lots of adults think that a potentially life threatening disease is scary. I do. I think cancer is scary. Doesn't mean I think a person with cancer is scary.

If the other kids are talking about it, and ds wants to ask me questions, then we'll talk about it.
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#86 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 04:59 PM
 
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Ask around - lots of adults think that a potentially life threatening disease is scary. I do. I think cancer is scary. Doesn't mean I think a person with cancer is scary.

If the other kids are talking about it, and ds wants to ask me questions, then we'll talk about it.
But you dont see how you can extrapolate "scary person with disease" from "scary disease"? Ryan White was harassed for the most part because people were scared, they were afraid for their children. Throw in some bigotry and ignorance, and it makes it that much worse.

I guess we're just different. I dont think its such a jump from labelling a disease scary to the person with the disease (you know, the person who can *infect* you with this scary disease) being considered scary.

I guess if you have the mindset that HIV is scary, then yeah, your kid might get scared when you are explaining it to them.

I just dont get how labelling any disease as "scary" is helpful to understanding that disease or to preventing discrimination against those with the disease.


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#87 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 05:09 PM
 
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We're just getting into semantics here. If no one was "scared" of getting HIV, then we wouldn't be talking about ways to protect ourselves from it. A lot of people think that something that can kill you is scary. You can substitute whatever word you like to use. I'm picking a word that my 7yo uses to describe things that worry him.
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#88 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 05:14 PM
 
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Ask around - lots of adults think that a potentially life threatening disease is scary. I do. I think cancer is scary. Doesn't mean I think a person with cancer is scary.

If the other kids are talking about it, and ds wants to ask me questions, then we'll talk about it.
when kids think something is scary and dont understand it, they shun the person with it, that is why it needs to be taught in school
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#89 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 05:16 PM
 
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Honestly, I agree with the concept of teaching some things as they come up. Some parents might actually be surprised at all the opportunities that can arise to bring up topics... at any age. It's more a matter of catering the teaching to the individual child, which can be EXTREMELY difficult in a public/private school setting. (My mom claims she spent a great deal of time un-teaching me and my sister while we were going to public school.)

Using HIV/AIDS as an example, I vaguely remember seeing news reports about Ryan White and others during the 80s and asking my mom about them. Mom would explain the basics to me of how the people were sick and other people were being stupid for not treating them like humans. After all, when someone gets the flu we should try to take care of them, give them medicine, make chicken soup, whatever. Why should another disease be different? Knowing it was a type of illness made me not want to go out and get it, but it didn't make me want to treat those people like less than dogs if I were to ever meet them or others like them.

My little sister opened the doors for conversation a little earlier. She was watching Saturday morning cartoons when one of the classic "Get drunk, get stupid, get AIDS" commercials came on. Since it was right in the middle of all the commercials about toys and cereals, she immediately said, "Mom, can I have AIDS?" That was a fun conversation that Mom still talks about.

As far as the movie, I agree with the previous posters about wanting to screen the film first or, at the very least, research the title online. If it's like most of the films we watched in school, a copy could probably be found at the public library. Is/was it a film geared specifically toward children like The Magic School Bus series or something? (I know there have been plenty of times favorite cartoon characters have been used in educational films.) If it were something like And the Band Played On, I would be iffy on the child seeing it depending on the child. That was a movie I actually didn't get to see until a college psychology class. I fully plan on having my child/children watching it when they are older, too, because it is the best one I've ever seen.

Regardless, since the OP did sign the slip allowing for the movie to be watched, I would make sure to discuss the movie thoroughly with the child as soon as school was out. It's always best to make sure the lines of communication remain open and that things can be clarified. It also gives the parent more ideas of what to talk about at home and if further study is immediately required. (Of course, this is all based completely on how I was raised since my first child has yet to arrive.)

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#90 of 112 Old 05-25-2008, 05:17 PM
 
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when kids think something is scary and dont understand it, they shun the person with it, that is why it needs to be taught in school
We homeschool, so I actually don't rely on school to teach my kids basic respect and acceptance of all human beings. We've got that covered.
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