Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: proud mama land
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Homeschooling, Homesteading Mama to DD ('02) and DS ('04)
|Originally posted by mamawanabe
But is the variable having a mom and a dad (and does it matter if these rolls are filled by the same gender or is the key differnt genders?) or is it that the child is in a stable household, which, in this society, tends to mean a nuclear family?
There shouldn't be anything innately superior about the two parent household except that such a household is the norm, and households that fall out of this norm do so in tangent with certain economic, emotional, and cultural risk factors. So the problem would not be teh norm, but the risk factors.
It does gets trickier when the todler becomes a pre-adolecent and adolecent. Opposite sex role models become extremely important as does having a family that fits the norm and thus can be quiet backdrop to your own fraught identity formations. But again, satbility is probably more important that mom-dad formula.
|Originally posted by Britishmum
Then I'd look for someone stable in dd's life to do the fatherly stuff with her - can a relative do this? Grandpa? Can you arrange activities for her to do with a male relative regularly?
|Originally posted by oatmeal
I guess this issue is coming to a head for us a lot earlier than I thought. I have been crying a lot today over it. Seeing her distraught that way and hollering desperately for a daddy who doesn't exist is more than gut wrenching. It's hard to describe how deeply and horribly it hurts me to see it, and to realize I have given her this life....<snip> I feel so awful that this is her deal in life. I feel like I would die to change it for her.