We have a neighbor who we're good friends with. They have a daughter who is 6 months older than our DD (DD just turned 3), and they love playing together. The problem is that their daughter is really manipulative and our DD, having no reason to not trust her friend, goes right along with whatever her friend tells her to do. For example, its not uncommon for the friend to tell our DD to do something the friend knows is wrong, but she has my DD do it because then DD will get in trouble instead of her.
As of now we don't let DD play at their home if we're not there, since we found the kids are not well supervised (there was an incident where the friend told my DD to eat some "salad" from the back yard. Luckily it wasn't toxic, but we later found they were outside by themselves while the adults were inside.)
But should we not allow them to play together at all? DD also comes back with all sorts of annoying/inappropriate sayings after visiting with her friend, which doesn't help matters. I know if we say something to her parents they'll be offended, and I'm not sure its worth the confrontation.
I'm sure her willingness to trust her friend and do what she tells her is totally developmentally normal, so I'm not sure explaining the situation will help her be any more discriminating in her "following the leader". My husband gets irritated though, trying to explain to her that she shouldn't do what her friend tells her when she knows its wrong, etc., but I think its pointless. Thoughts?