For those of us who are still pg...anyone scared? - Mothering Forums

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Old 07-27-2006, 06:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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As much as I want this baby to come already, I am so scared about the actual labor. Sure, this is my 4th child, but I had two medicated births & a c/s & this time I am trying to have an unmedicated VBAC so I am a little worried. Could this fear be keeping my body from going into labor? I doubt it because otherwise every first time mother would never go into labor, am I right?? So as much as I want this baby, I keep thinking, if he wants to stay in a little longer that is fine because I don't want to have to experience the labor & healing afterwards. Does anyone else feel this way? Also, I keep thinking, I hope labor doesn't strat when I am shopping or out running errands. My mother keeps telling me to put plastic over my mattress so if m y water breaks in the night, I won't ruin it. I say, better my water breaks in bed then while shopping at Target I think I might have too much time on my hands. Must stop thinking so much. Ok, time to go clean the bathroom, maybe that will get something going.
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Old 07-27-2006, 07:18 PM
 
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I don't think worrying will keep a baby in. It will make YOU more uncomfortable, though... Do you have any relaxation techniques you planto use? I'd start now, and get in the zone. This will be my third unmedicated labor, and I'm not worried about the labor at all. I know I don't particularly enjoy it, it's not that much fun, it takes forever no matter how fast it goes, but it does end and there's a baby at the end, so it's fine. And the exhilaration when it's over - it's the best thing in the world.

I'm much more scared of what I'll do to myself, my house and my poor family if I have to stay pregnant for much longer. I actually hope my water will break every time I leave the house (and every time I stay home, for that matter) - Target, the grocery store, I don't care just bring it on!!! Amniotic fluid smells better than pee, in my opinon
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Old 07-27-2006, 08:09 PM
 
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I worried until I got this article...


The rules of gestation.
With Cadan my cycles were an average 28 days...with trying to conceive this one it was anywhere from 32-49 days....lol

EDD Theory #1 7/22/06

EDD Theory # 2 7/30/06

EDD ZTheory # 3 7/26/06



This info came out of the book Heart & Hands by Elizabeth Davis. I just thought I'd share since so many women tend to go past their doc's EDD (Unless you induce.)
Most docs go by Naegale's rule which is that pregnancy lasts 40 weeks. To get your EDD you take your LMP and count back 3 months and add one week.

"A word of caution-don't take the EDD too seriously. The Mittendorf study showed the average length of human gestation to be forty-one weeks plus one day. No wonder only 5 percent of women give birth on their due date! Frustrated by the confines of Naegale's Rule, midwifery professor Carol Wood Nichols developed a method of calculating the EDD that takes into account variations in cycle length as well as previous childbearing. Here is her formula, known as Nichols' rule:
First time moms with 28 day cycles:LMP + 12 months - 2 months, 14 days = EDD
Second time moms or more with 28 day cycles: LMP + 12 months - 2 months, 18 days = EDD
Cycles longer than 28 days: EDD + (days in cycle - 28 days) = EDD
Cycles shorter than 28 days: EDD - (28 days - days in cycle) = EDD

carlie~33 DP~40 mom to Cadan Riley 7/22/04, Kailin Naiya 8/05/06,, Ronen Blake12/13/08 , Rosen Blythe 7/26/10.
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Old 07-27-2006, 10:06 PM
 
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I'm so glad you started this thread, because I feel this way too. I have some specific things that are making me nervous. This is my 3rd full-term birth. My first was medicated (induced, etc.) and my second was a medication-free stillbirth, except for being induced. Now here I am, trying to go naturally for the first time. I don't know what not being induced is like and I'm over my due date facing possible induction. Not only that, but I am nervous to flashback to my daughter's birth from last year and panic in the middle of this birth. I wonder if all of this is stopping me from going into labor. I try to rationalize it the same way as you did - then many women would never go into labor - but it doesn't help me. I just hope this baby will decide to come out on his own and soon so that I don't have to face any decision, like sweeping membranes and induction that I don't want to decide on.
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Old 07-27-2006, 10:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by coleslaw
I'm so glad you started this thread, because I feel this way too. I have some specific things that are making me nervous. This is my 3rd full-term birth. My first was medicated (induced, etc.) and my second was a medication-free stillbirth, except for being induced. Now here I am, trying to go naturally for the first time. I don't know what not being induced is like and I'm over my due date facing possible induction. Not only that, but I am nervous to flashback to my daughter's birth from last year and panic in the middle of this birth. I wonder if all of this is stopping me from going into labor. I try to rationalize it the same way as you did - then many women would never go into labor - but it doesn't help me. I just hope this baby will decide to come out on his own and soon so that I don't have to face any decision, like sweeping membranes and induction that I don't want to decide on.
I'm glad I'm not the only one. My Mw's are also starting to talk about sweeping my membranes since I can only stay in their care for 41 weeks due to my VBAC status. At my appt tomorrow, they are going to try to get me to schedule a c/s for 41 weeks & I am thinking of the best way to push that off. I have never been on a time clock before & I am wondering if maybe there is something to it that is stopping my body from going into labor. I feel like there is so much pressure to have the baby this week or I lose my chance, that I can't relax enough to let it happen. Only time will tell....
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Old 07-28-2006, 12:04 AM
 
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I've had a birth augmented with pitocin and an unmedicated birth. They are light years apart pain-wise. I was much better prepared with knowledge the second time which significantly lessened my fear of the pain of childbirth. I was not expecting labor to be excessively painful, but for it to be a lot of work for my body. I think that helped my perception of pain at the time.

My biggest fear last time was of a repeat c-section. Unmedicated birth really was secondary to my goal of avoiding another traumatic experience. BUT, having already experienced it there is no way I would do anything else. Other posts have already mentioned the unbelievable feeling when you can feel everything. Nothing short of amazing.

You don't have to schedule the c-section. Tell them you need to check with your childcare arrangements first. Or schedule it and then either cancel at the last minute or don't show. It takes a lot of strength to do something like that, but women are amazingly strong. Your body will birth this baby if the baby is given enough time. And I know that you already know that just because you are at 41 weeks is not a valid reason for surgery. It is sad that this time of your life is filled with this kind of stress. Lots of hugs to you!

ETA: The other night I had a bout of nausea and bowel cleansing and I panicked about the birth. I got that out of my system, but the fear I think is normal as other posts have said.
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Old 07-28-2006, 12:11 AM
 
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I was induced the first time, but no meds. The second time I so freaking scared! I had been told it would be a piece of cake with no induction, but all I could think of was: not wanting to go into labor in the middle of the night, not having the one midwife out of three that I liked, but not the best, the pain that lay ahead. I ended up being in prelabor for two days (contractions every 30 minutes) then going from every 30 to every 5 within a matter of minutes. Then with my fear still accompanying me, I was in labor for 12 hours. Once I talked things over with my midwife and finally decided I could do it, I had my ds within an hour! So, I don't know if fear keeps you from going into labor, but I think it prolonged mine. Talk this out with your midwife or doctor, it might help!
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