How awful for you! Each woman and each pregnancy is different, and I'm shocked that they were so judgemental of you!
Unfortunately, I have known a handful of women who had very little regard for the 'guidelines' when they were expecting. Some people I've known have indulged in DAILY glasses of wine, several glasses of wine on the same occasion, and in a couple of cases, recreational drugs. Of course I was personally horrified and scared for them, but never told them what I felt. Lucky for them, all babies came out just fine-as far as we know. Needless to say, there are lots and lots of things that you can do that would be so much worse than a half glass of wine here or there.
I agree with the PP about the European mentality on this issue. Our medical providers choose to err on the side of caution in the States because people are so ready for a law suit these days. Everything in moderation they say-caffeine, sun, food, alcohol, you name it.
Have your glass of wine! You'll be fine! I had a small glass of wine last night watching Taylor Hicks on American Idol.
It's not a daily (or even weekly) habit for me, but I love wine and I felt like a little, so I had some. Next time someone is so viciously critical of you, maybe a response like, 'I've done extensive reading and have talked with my doctor/midwife about having a small glass of wine once in a while in the second or third trimester, and WE agree that there is no harm in an occasional indulgence' will keep them quiet.
I'm with you! Hang in there!