Support thread: Trusting your baby and your body's timing - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
Old 09-19-2006, 11:14 PM
 
mojumi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Chesapeake Bay, EUS
Posts: 614
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I trust my baby's timing but it makes me nuts to feel like my due date was my 'expiration' date. Immediately everyone starts asking when I'm going to be induced, or acting like I'm going to explode. (Now, true enough that emotionally I may be ready to explode but not physically ... ) And of course everyone wants to know if I'm effaced, dialated, etc. I say 'well, we know I'm not in labor so that's irrelevant" and people stare like I have three heads. (I've had no internals since my initial prenatal exam 30-odd wks ago. And no intention of having one to satisfy strangers in the grocery check out line.) Everyone wants to tell me a horror story about how 'late' they were, or their friend, how the baby was too big, they needed a section, blah blah blah. And then I want to shake them when they tell me they went to 39 weeks and had to induce because the baby was almost 8 pounds. Oh, really? My first was over 9 pounds and a day shy of 42 weeks, but that worked out fine I'm sure this will too, thank you very much.

Rant over. Deep breath. Thank you.

IBCLC, LLLL, Mom to 3, obsessive baker, where's my coffee
mojumi is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 09-20-2006, 12:32 PM
 
time4another's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Between Here and There
Posts: 677
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Well...today's my "due date" whatever the heck that means...

What it means is this: DD's classmate's parents start telling me that they hope they don't see me 'next week', they tell me I look 'done', I don't even want to show my face for dance or to pick DD up from school.

DH asks me on a daily, almost hourly basis 'how I'm feeling' um, yeah dear, I think I'd tell you if I felt any different than when you asked this morning...

I'm getting sad because of all the 'predictions' that friends/family members are making...DH predicted last Saturday boy was he wrong, his sister choose the same weekend and MIL thinks that 'today's the day' (um sorry MIL, but *I have no signs at ALL* of giving birth within the next 12-14hrs).

I'm also EXTREMELY upset by people telling me when I can or can't have the baby, including myself I admit. Except now, I have my calendar cleared and she's free to arrive at any moment. I'm annoyed that I have to keep the Patriot's home schedule in my head for the next few weeks. I'm annoyed at myself because I am utterly aware of what days would be better than others (Mondays and Fridays DDs have dance). :

I'm anxious for her to be born. I can't wait to see her. I can't wait to nurse her. I can't wait to have the whole HB experience. I know perfectly well she'll choose her birthday when she's ready. Its hard right now though because, well I'm tired, cranky, my body is just huge and achy-heck, I bent over the other night to pick something up off the floor and almost fell onto my face! : My other two were both born within 3 days of thier due dates so I know it could be very soon too...

I feel like a watch pot & I want to go hide and not talk to anyone until she's born.:



Heather
time4another is offline  
Old 09-20-2006, 02:14 PM
 
maciascl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: The Land of Confusion
Posts: 3,544
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mojumi View Post
I trust my baby's timing but it makes me nuts to feel like my due date was my 'expiration' date. Immediately everyone starts asking when I'm going to be induced, or acting like I'm going to explode. (Now, true enough that emotionally I may be ready to explode but not physically ... )
: My MIL is calling me literally EVERY DAY to see how I am feeling. She knows she is one of the 1st people that will get a call when I go into labor becuase she is going to help take care of DS. Yesterday my mom AND my Step-dad called too. MY SILs called over the weekend so I am sure they are due to call again soon.

What do these people want me to tell them??? I am crabby & I don't want to talk to you!!! Because that is how I feel Oddly enough when my friends call I am totally fine, but I don't think my friends are expecting me to 'explode' at any moment quite like my family is. Truely I appreciate that my family cares & is intrested, but I just don't know what they expect me to say to them. I realize I've not had my baby yet & I am TRYING to remain calm & relaxed about it...and your calls are not helping me!!!!

OK I am done now I kep telling DH I am just going to put a message on the answering mach saying that I am still preg & will let people know when I am not anymore & stop answering the phone, but I'm afraid to hurt peoples feelings because I know they are only calling because they care...grrrrr...so frustrating

Cheryl, wife to an amazing man, homeschooling SAHM to Gavin 12/03, Rhys 09/06, and Ian Aug 11, 2010.

maciascl is offline  
Old 09-20-2006, 02:39 PM
 
elanorh's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 2,235
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
DH asks me on a daily, almost hourly basis 'how I'm feeling' um, yeah dear, I think I'd tell you if I felt any different than when you asked this morning...
I told dh last night (about the tenth time he asked me this yesterday) - "You know, honey - you're the person I am MOST going to need with me when I go into labor, don't worry, I will definitely tell you if things start changing!!" He keeps hoping/wondering/worrying. And was horrified when I told him yesterday that, just because in retrospect I was having some signs of early labor (a couple contractions) earlier in the day before I knew I was going into labor with Ina --- doesn't mean I'll have any signs like that *this* time and I could very well just go into labor and deliver a few hours later. His reaction: !!

And, all the calls and emails from friends "just checking in" with us - not so frustrating as family. I can understand friends wondering, "Well, did they have the baby but forget to call or email?" But relatives -- obviously they're going to get a call.

Anyway - we're approaching the due date quickly now. I've been calling it the "due estimate" with people. Wish I'd heard that suggestion back when we first HAD a due date. Our Ina-watchers are all super-busy this weekend, so it's pretty likely that baby will arrive sometime this weekend (and quickly) since it is more likely that this weekend, we would have a situation where we couldn't contact anyone fast enough to get her cared for.

Not all who wander are lost.
elanorh is offline  
Old 09-23-2006, 12:07 AM
 
elanorh's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 2,235
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thought I'd check in again ....

SIL has a friend who is due the same day we are - at her appointment today the doctor wanted to schedule the induction for next week "in case" she doesn't deliver before then. : Friend thinks this is ridiculous, fortunately. And so does SIL.

DH told his dad tonight that, "You do realize that we could have this baby even in October, there's a two week window after the due date?" His dad was flabbergasted. What's with treating the due date like it's an absolute finish line and if you haven't had babe by 12:01 that next day, something's wrong??? : Fortunately, dh is on board with the "no induction without a medical indication (distress)" approach.

OB is also quite laid-back. At my appointment yesterday he said, "Well, I'll see you next Thursday if not sooner!" No talk about inductions, etc. at all. I suppose if I'm in the office next Thursday, we'll talk about it a bit - but I think he'll respect our want not to induce unless there's a medical concern; he's pretty laid-back.

I really think next time I'll "over" estimate by about 2 weeks with everyone (except dh and maybe my mom) -- and just remind people that babies have about a month+ window for when they will decide, on their own, when to come.

We're getting a lot of calls. DH is getting annoyed even! He's the one who answers the phone most of the time.

And my "to do" list has gotten much shorter. All I have "left" to do now, is scrub the kitchen floor -- everything else is frosting on the cake (extra sewing projects completed etc.).

Not all who wander are lost.
elanorh is offline  
Old 09-23-2006, 03:45 PM
 
maciascl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: The Land of Confusion
Posts: 3,544
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by elanorh View Post

We're getting a lot of calls. DH is getting annoyed even! He's the one who answers the phone most of the time.
Uggg...the phone calls are insane!!! My MIL is calling everyday & DH got really ticked yesterday because my MIL called me in a panic because I didn't answer the home phone (duh I was out : ) & he didn't answer his cell, which never rang...I think she is making things up now. I appreciate that they care, but don't they realize how draining their constant calls are? Oddly enough friends calling doesn't bother me. I think becuse they are not acting like I am about to expode at any moment & my family is.

Anyway I had my first session of real strong, painful, timeable ctx that petered out last night: : I got up to go pee & when I tried to get off the toilet I couldn't move. It was very strange I felt very open & it seemed to last forever. Finally I went back to bed & timed them for about an hour. they were mostly about 10 min apart & 1 min long. Then I had to pee again & I was hungry so went potty & had a snack & the ctx disapeared. I am very bummed because I really kinda hoped they'd just start up again this morning...but nothing yet. Please baby please :

Cheryl, wife to an amazing man, homeschooling SAHM to Gavin 12/03, Rhys 09/06, and Ian Aug 11, 2010.

maciascl is offline  
Old 09-23-2006, 05:01 PM
 
Diprincess's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Vancouver, WA
Posts: 193
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I really thought last night/this morning was it. My dh and I went for a 3 mile walk Wednesday (my due date) and a 3.5 mile walk last night. Nothing happened after Wednesday's walk, but last night I started having contractions every 4-5 minutes for 2 hours. They started slowing down at about 1am, so I made myself some RRL tea, and they started up again around 2:30am or so. They were every 5 minutes for the next 3 hours, and have been pretty much gone since then. I've been pretty disappointed today because of that, but my mom said she'd come watch our ds again so we could go for another walk. Hopefully that will help.
Diprincess is offline  
Old 09-23-2006, 05:20 PM
 
time4another's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Between Here and There
Posts: 677
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
well my body's practicing too. Nothing too close together, just very noticeable and crampy. I felt very different yesterday afternoon, she's dropped some more. Nothing today though...getting depressed. This is officially my longest pg yet, as both DDs were born by this GA. I keep thinking that next weekend at this time I'll be holding her...and muttering behind my breath 'I sure hope so'.

I wanted to walk a couple times today but its raining out. I've finished up everything I could think of to do. The only things I've got on my list now are ordering invitations and party favors for DD1s BDay party next month and weed & tend to my roses, which I can't do now, cuz its raining of course. We're going out in a bit to do some window shopping for a new fridge (write down model #s and such), then have really bad for you food. That'll accomplish some walking at least.

Tomorrow, if I'm still pg then i'll do my rose garden. Its also suposed to thunder tomorrow...so I'm hoping for a big storm & big change in barometric pressure.

sigh...

Heather
time4another is offline  
Old 09-23-2006, 06:36 PM
 
ComaWhite's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 2,005
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Well, its my due date today and my body is doing NOTHING!!!!! no bh, no nothing at all. Ah well!
I wonder how much longer this little one needs to cook?

Im anxious to meet him/her but I really am enjoying these last few days alone with and totally focused on my dd. I really love my girl and Im so excited because I know shes going to be a great big sister
ComaWhite is offline  
Old 09-23-2006, 09:54 PM
 
quinbearzmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 617
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
It is such a relief to read these posts and know that I'm not alone in becoming really anxious. I feel like my mood swings have hit an all time record as I try to stay positive but 30 minutes later have convinced myself that this baby is going to be 2 weeks late. : Glad I have all of you for support

J - Birth doula and *very* grateful mama to bouncy Q, fancy F, and mighty F!

quinbearzmama is offline  
 
User Tag List

Thread Tools


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off