Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Barrie, Ontario
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So, I hate to even complain about this. Maybe I'm over-reacting or feeling a little bit sensitive. BUT....
my husband is driving me crazy. Apparently he thinks that b/c I'm home with the baby, it makes me his personal secretary and he can't figure out why I can't get things done throughout the day. I think I'm doing really well - I keep the house relatively clean, make dinner at night, get the diapers cleaned, follow-up with insurance, midwife & the hospital, pay bills, etc. And this is on top of feeding, cleaning, changing diapers, and keeping Caleigh as happy as possible. I'm doing this on about five or six hours of sleep a night and I don't ask that he gets up with me for a nightly feeding with her.
But he's just made some really irritating comments that to me seem a little underhanded. Before I got up this morning, he started the laundry. I hadn't had a chance to put away some of the baby clothes from the last time they were washed so he washed them again thinking they were dirty. When I mentioned that they were clean, he looked at me and said "What, you didn't have time to put them away in the last two days?!?" He also came across some things that need to go to the Salvation Army which I haven't had a chance to donate yet and he wants to know why they haven't been dropped off yet. He'll also call from work asking me to make phone calls, send out mail, print things off the computer, put his sister's car on ebay to sell it, etc. Writing this down doesn't make it sound like a lot, but it really seems to me that he doesn't have any idea how much work it is to keep the house running and take care of a baby. Today, as I was breast-feeding, he actually looked at me and asked me to get a phone number for him from our home office. (Um, hello? I'm BREAST FEEDNG RIGHT NOW.)
His dad is also being incredibly rude, I think. We were at their place the other day for dinner and he asks when I plan on going back to work. My DH and I decided I'd go back when we move up to my hometown in March. That gives me four months with the baby at home - totally reasonable and in fact, a little short if you ask me. I'd love to be home for at least the first year. When I mentioned that it wouldn't be until March, he looked at me and said "Well, I know lots of women who go back earlier, at about three months. What do you do all day that you need to be home for four months?"
I couldn't even respond to him. WTF is that kind of comment? Apparently raising a child isn't important enough in his mind and he needs to make that known? I am so tired of comments like this from him (there have been many over the last few months) and personally, can't wait to make the move up to Canada. I just find some of my husband's family members to be so toxic sometimes!!!
OK, I'm getting off topic. Do you think I'm being a little too sensitive? I feel as if there are any more offhand comments from my husband (I'll leave my husband's father out of this for now), I'm going to blow! Does anyone have any advice for how to deal with this???