I'm not in your DDC, but I was a couple years ago and I would *love* for someone to be able to learn from my mistakes.
DD was due 12/4ish and made her appearance unexpectedly on 11/23, a few days before Thanksgiving. We were released Thanksgiving morning. Our parents were ok with us just going home (because they'd already gotten to meet her!) but other family members wanted us to come straight from the hospital to the family dinner!! It's a good thing we didn't, because it turns out the two most insistent ones had the flu.
But I was feeling guilty, so the next day I said some friends and family could come by, as long as no one was sick, anyone who smoked washed and changed first, etc. I figured if they staggered their visits, what could be the harm of it? Well, dh's cousins showed up with their 1-year-old son, who had a cold and was rubbing his nose and then touching *everything.* Smokers showed up and washed their hands, but hadn't washed their hair or clothes. I got so stressed out trying to be polite and social but feeling like a mama bear wanting to protect my child at the same time. To top it off, my milk came in that day! All of a sudden I was engorged and sore, my breasts were too big for dd to latch on easily, so I'm sitting there trying to learn how to nurse for the first time with people and noise and distractions . . . ugh. It was horrible. I was exhausted and stressed, dd was stressed; I finally fled into the bedroom in tears. DD went on a 19-hour nursing strike on the right side and we ended up back at the hospital the next day for a SEVEN HOUR consultation with an LC.
We knew better with ds. I came home and holed up in bed with him for a solid week. DH politely kicked out anyone who stayed more than a few minutes. All visitors were asked to bring food or clean something when they got here.
Even though we had a much rougher start with ds and I had some more healing to do, I recovered much faster and was in better spirits this time.
Claim your babymoon, mama. If anyone gives you flak, remind them that aside from labor(!) and giving birth(!!), your placenta is the size of a dinner plate so that's the size wound your uterus is healing from after birth after the placenta detaches. No one would expect anyone with a surgical wound that size to be up and about immediately, would they? Much less drive 4 hours (which would be more like 8 with a newborn needing to stop and nurse every 1-2 hours for up to 45 minutes at a time).