Is anyone else scared? **Update post #18** - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 12:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm expecting our 4th baby, so you'd think I would be an expert by now.

I turned 38 weeks on Saturday. Sunday(yesterday) morning I woke up and felt kind of cruddy. I kept having diahrea and having a bunch of contractions. I tried to drink some water to make sure i wasn't dehydrated, then I took a bath to try to relax me. And then I started freaking out. : I got really overwhelmed thinking it was the real thing and that I really wasn't ready for labor right now(I totally want my baby here and can hardly wait, I just am not wanting the labor!!). My DH came in from cleaning the garage and I was talking to him and I said I want a c-section. : Our baby has been breech, the midwife turned him/her last Monday and I am 99% sure he/she turned back to breech. She will still do a home birth for a breech if we want that, as long as it's not a footling breech. So then my husband and I take a little walk around our yard and I said I could compromise and not have the c-section but have an epidural instead. My husband is telling me, you don't want a c-section, & you've given birth 3 times before without any kind of pain meds, vaginally, you don't want that. I honestly at the time felt like it would be the "easy" route to take. I don't know what the heck is wrong with me...of course I don't really WANT a c-section....I've paid all this money out of pocket to have a home birth....I don't even want to set foot into a hospital. I don't want an epidural either. I just wanted peace.

I sort of feel like I lost it for a bit there. I kept saying I wasn't ready and that I wanted to do this another day. Eventually the contractions slowed down, though I still had diahrea for the rest of the day. What's wrong with me? I really can hardly wait to meet my little one, but for some reason after 3 natural births, I'm scared of labor this time. (I've had 2 hospital births, and then one planned unassisted home birth...this one is planned home birth with a midwife).

Do you think it could be because I'm pretty sure the baby is breech and that just freaks me out a bit? I feel in my head that if the baby were to turn head down again that maybe I wouldn't be so scared? I've got an appointment with a Webster Certified Chiropractor for Wed(the soonest they could get me in). I've been reading they have great sucess with breech babies turning, so I'm hoping/praying that it will work for us too.

So if you got this far, thank you so much for caring enough to read!! Am I the only one that has had children before and is still scared??

Sara

Homeschooling Mama to 6. Waiting for baby #7 to arrive mid September.
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#2 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 12:52 PM
 
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Awwwwww Sara! Just hang in there! I hope your chiro is able to help your little Bean stay head down! I understand about being worried about the labor! I just want to see the baby too! Forget the whole labor thing... Just wake me up when she's out!!!

DH Cain Mamma to 3 girls LO due 2/15
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#3 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 12:58 PM
 
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Well, I've had a baby already and I'm starting to get nervous about the labor. If I think about it too much I start to get worried that I won't be able to "perform" this time. I'm actually going to see a therapist today who specializes in pregnancy and birth to process my last birth before I have this one.

I can understand being more nervous about having a breech baby. I would probably have a moment where I asked for a c-section, too. I hope the chiro is helpful to you. I believe you can have this baby vaginally!
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#4 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 01:49 PM
 
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i'm not scared. But I think I'm in denial

I'm sure it's perfectly understandable to have jitters!
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#5 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 02:19 PM
 
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's Sara!!! I'm scared too, and this is my 6th!! My baby is still breech as well (36 weeks on Saturday). I'm scared I'll end up with a C-section even though we're planning a HB. I have an appointment with our MW later today, and I hope baby has turned. She recommended a chiro that does the Webster technique, so if baby hasn't turned yet, I'm going to make an appointment even though I'm scared of chiros too.

I've been talking to baby, telling him/her that it's time to turn around now, and trying the different positions to help baby to turn. I just hope something works.

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#6 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 02:29 PM
 
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I understand where you are comign from. My midwife told me that sometimes the more you have (this is #4 for me, too) the more scared you get. You remember what labor was like. That birth amnesia is gone. She says that some of her clients that have had 7 or 8 or whatever are the ones with really long births, because they are holding back when they go into labor. They key is to be relaxed and let the baby come out. I had some blockage last time (mental) and my labor was long because of it.

Hang in there, you will do great! You know exactly what to do, and hopefully the baby is turned and everything will be fine. My chiro turned my baby a couple weeks ago with some simple ligament massage.
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#7 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 03:08 PM
 
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I am glad you posted this. I have been having these flashes of panic here and there, out of nowhere, when I think of labor. I have no reason to, both my DDs births were lovely.

I think it is just the brain's way of trying to process what it knows to be a huge and sometimes overwhelming physical process. It probably is even healthy and good to be having these feelings.

I know it has made me stop and do some visualization and thinking about this upcoming labor, which is always a good thing.

Also for breech, moxibustion is a great way to stimulate that babe to turn. Most women need a couple treatments, but it is very effective.

ND

Mama to 3 daughters, expecting #4chicken3.gif

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#8 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 03:22 PM
 
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Yes, I've been getting flashes of panic as well for the upcoming birth of #4. For me its the fact that, having BTDT, and having experienced not birth complications but pregnancy complications, I no longer take the whole process for granted. Also there is the definite lack of amnesia, I do remember how much work is involved. But I am also very excited to meet this new little one (although not for a couple more weeks at least) and I know that I have the strength necessary to help her transition from the womb to the world. And so do you Sara,(and all you other mamas) try to think about the amazing strength you had rather than the struggle of birth. I can't wait to read your great birth story.
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#9 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 03:30 PM
 
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I just started getting a little panicky today. I'm spending a lot of time remembering how I got through rock climbing... I know that imagery helped me a lot when I was in labor with DD.

I'm sure the baby's possible breech position is worrying you a bit. Chat with your midwife about it... lots of women give birth to breech babies, and you have a "proven" pelvis as they say. The baby will fit and be just fine. You'll make it through labor like a champ, just one contraction at a time. Don't even worry about how far you've come or how far you have to go. You can handle anything for 1 minute and that's how long a contraction lasts.

you can do it!
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#10 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 04:32 PM
 
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First of all !! I'm sorry you're feeling this way, hon. I'm on baby # 4, too, & have had similar feelings. It's hard because you want it to be easy & try to come up with ways to make it easier but those ways really aren't when you stop to really think about it. It's so conflicting, with all these thoughts & emotions going through you right now.

Just know everything will work out. I would be afraid of delivering a breech baby, too, even though it's a common occurance in other countries. It's just not practiced here in the states much & it's ingrained into us that it's not safe, so of course we're going to have some fears about it. Much more than we realize until we're faced with it.

I hope the baby turns back for you & you're able to grab ahold of some stable emotions & not let go. You'll be in my thoughts & prayers.

Shannon
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#11 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 05:18 PM
 
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I am feeling scared, too, also despite this being my 4th time. You are not alone! I can't even pinpoint what exactly is concerning me. Maybe that my last birth was so close to completely perfect that I am worried this time can only be worse in some way.

Maybe make up some affirmation/mantras for yourself? Mine include that my body knows what it is doing, that I just have to melt into the rushes once they start. I also find reading positive birth stories (I like UC stories best!) help me. And envisioning what the perfect birth would be like.

Hang in there!
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#12 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 08:15 PM
 
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Your fears sounds pretty normal! Having a baby is a scary, exciting thing. I bet everyone feels nervous. I know I do. I'm not too worried about my labor, I've had an easy time with my other two, but I'm really scared about the adjustment to three children, and our financial situation. My 3.5 year old is sooo excited, but I'm very sorried about my little guy, he'll only be 19 months, and I don't know how he'll take it all.

Mommy to kids

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#13 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 09:37 PM
 
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This will be my first, but I'm not at all scared of labor. I'm scared and intimidated by the idea of having this little bitty person who will be completely dependent on me for his every need!!!

I think having some fear is normal, regardless of what form it takes. Everything's gonna be fine mama!!
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#14 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 09:38 PM
 
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I'm not scared of the labor/delivery so much as I am adding another child to the two that already seem to take so much of my time and energy. I worry that I'll have a hard time meeting the needs of everyone, and I just want everything to do smoothly.

I think our fears are normal. (((HUGS))) to you and hopes that everything will be fine.
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#15 of 25 Old 11-20-2006, 10:15 PM
 
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I think that if you have had pretty easy births before it is pretty natural to think that something has got to go wrong now or there is a greater chance that something will go wrong just because you have been lucky before. At least this is how I think--I think I've had two pretty easy births without any complications so statistically, something has to go wrong now--no one can be this lucky...

Plus, you just know more about the whole process--I thought it would be easier this time, but I find my self more anxious/fearful about the pain and my ability to cope with it. You have other children to think of, too...

take a deep breath (keep taking them!) and relax. Baby will be here--

my brother was head down throughout my mom's entire pregnancy with him, and then 2 days before he was born he flipped into breach position! So, at least you know and can plan... my brother was delivered vaginally w/o any complications....

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#16 of 25 Old 11-21-2006, 06:42 PM
 
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I'm having #4 and you bet I'd be nervous if my babe were breech. I get flashes of panic now and then as it is. mama! You will get through it and do great!

Tracey, mama of 5 beloved children here with me on Earth and one precious son I will meet again in Heaven 6/17/09 - 9/6/09.

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#17 of 25 Old 11-21-2006, 07:56 PM
 
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Well, I'm having number one and I'm very nervous/scared, although I'm doing my darnedest to hypnotize myself in the other direction! (I'm doing hypnobabies!) AND my baby has been head down for weeks, and suddenly yesterday decided to turn TRANSVERSE which a) is very uncomfy for mama and b) what the heck ya doin' in there honey?!?! :roflmao I'm trying to keep a positive outlook on this.

I just started listening to the hypnobabies birth affirmations and that stuff... I mean, who knows? But it HELPS me calm down so much that no matter what else it does, I'm grateful for that. Maybe you could write out a little list of affirmations for yourself... about how your body gives birth perfectly! Your baby will turn! All will be wonderful! etc, etc, etc. It is amazing how it helps me relax, I tend to be suuuuuuuuuuuuuch a worrier.

I wonder if there is a biological (ie: hormonal) reason that as we approach the end of pregnancy we get nervous, even if we haven't been before. Like maybe it encourages us to withdraw from the world to help ensure we're in a safe place to give birth, or something! I love thinking about all the instincts and biology that go into all of this, it's just amazing to me

Anyways... hang in there, all the nervous mamas!
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#18 of 25 Old 11-22-2006, 01:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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This past Monday(38 weeks and 2 days), I had my midwife appointment. The baby was no longer breech!! Praise the Lord!! The midwife and I discussed things and we are wondering if Sunday when I was having so many contractions and freaking out if that was when the baby was turning head down on his/her own!!

I feel so much more peace now, knowing he/she isn't breech. Not to say I'm totally mentally ready for the labor, but I'm hoping that I will be when the time comes.

Thank you soooo much for all the prayers, kind words and encouragement. It was so nice to know I wasn't the only one scared.

Blessings Mamas & babies,
Sara

Homeschooling Mama to 6. Waiting for baby #7 to arrive mid September.
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#19 of 25 Old 11-22-2006, 02:09 PM
 
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YAY! I'm so glad for you!!!
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#20 of 25 Old 11-22-2006, 02:39 PM
 
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Woo-hoo! :
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#21 of 25 Old 11-22-2006, 03:19 PM
 
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That is truly wonderful!

mama to Ingrid (11/06) and Louisa (5/29/09):
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#22 of 25 Old 11-22-2006, 04:16 PM
 
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Yay!!! Glad baby turned for you Sara!!!


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#23 of 25 Old 11-22-2006, 07:57 PM
 
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Such good news!
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#24 of 25 Old 11-23-2006, 12:17 PM
 
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Oh, that's wonderful I'd be scared too.
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#25 of 25 Old 11-23-2006, 02:57 PM
 
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I'm so glad to hear that your babe is in the right position! What a relief for you.

"I got 99 problems, but the truth ain't one." - Stephen Colbert
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