Parenting with Love and Logic and the "Uh-Oh" song. - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 34 Old 11-12-2009, 08:18 PM
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L&L is waaaay too authoritarian for me. However, I like some of the theory, just not the practice. I could see parents who were having a hard time letting their kids fail and experience consequences finding some strength in L&L.

I will maybe use 1% of the book that I think is respectful and GD friendly. The rest is not GD imo.

By the time you have to lock your kids in their room (and that was in the book), I think you've lost the war.


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#32 of 34 Old 11-12-2009, 10:15 PM
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This is soooo weird. I've never read the parenting version, but I have read the teaching version, and it doesn't sound like this at all. I liked a lot of the strategies it had. Of course, when you're teaching a room of 20 six-year-olds, you have to have a bit more control than if you're with one six-year-old. But I don't recall anything demeaning or anything of what people are describing.

One book I loved a whole lot more, though, was Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline by Becky A. Bailey. She does teaching stuff, too, but I bought the parenting book, because it was a lot cheaper, and I think it is fabulous. In fact, it was recommended to me by someone on here.

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#33 of 34 Old 11-13-2009, 12:55 PM
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I have to say we took this class offered by the preschool and while I don't agree with a lot of it, we have taken some of the ideas and used them. I don't agree with the punishment parts, but do like the choices, they have helped us get ready and accomplish other things. I do say, "oh man" in a sympathetic voice when one of my children are being destructive or hurtful toward someone or something and then they do get taken away from the situation.

Also, dh was raised in a very bad way, most of the time being screamed at or threatened. And while he completely disagrees with this, it is also what comes natural to him, so it was a great alternative to him to learn how to stay calm and parent in a loving way. I would LOVE suggestions to books or even better, videos (he doesn't read much) that are great loving ways to parent and do gentle discipline.

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#34 of 34 Old 11-15-2009, 07:21 PM
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Originally Posted by tiffani View Post
Labbemama, I just want to send you my condolences, and my congratulations on the steps you're currently taking (or maybe I'm inferring incorrect information from your post, but I gather you and your children are in the DV shelter?)... I used to volunteer at a DV shelter/hotline, and I know how hard it is to make the strides that you're making, so kudos to you, and ...
No, we just go there for the class and therapy. There isn't room. We are in our own apartment struggling to get by.

I do like that phrase about energy although, I don't like letting my kids know they have worn me down. LOL. I think it only encourages them to keep at it. But I do give them choices and tell them for example that the way they are behaving at home makes me not want to take them out in public.

Today I gave dd kudos for telling her brother in a respectful way that she needed our one restroom ASAP and he did respond by kindly getting out of the shower. I suggested that if it ever is enough of an emergency she can run to the gas station. I tend to emphasize thinking about other possible solutions. It's important to me that my kids learn to solve their own problems because I do not want to be a referee and some day they will be on their own without me. I agree with that part. Learn it now while the price is affordable.

I have some of Becky Bailey's books.
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