Consequences for not doing chores? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 33 Old 09-04-2009, 11:35 AM
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Originally Posted by Ruthla View Post
Oh, we have those constantly! Sometimes we get things accomplished, sometimes kids space out and nothing is acheived, and sometimes they agree to things and then later they don't follow through.

Go ahead and crash away! Part of the point of asking for advice on a message board was to get a discussion going and help other parents with similar issues.
What do all of you do to minimize arguing when it comes to chores (and everything else)?

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#32 of 33 Old 09-04-2009, 02:38 PM
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I can't help but think the "assigned chores" is part of the problem. What about a rotating schedule? That way no one ends up permanently stuck with something they hate to do. Just make a list of what you need them to do - even put yourself on the list to really make the point that this is a FAMILY endeavor - and then rotate the chores through EVERYONE's names based on how often they need doing. And of course, the rule being that you don't get to "trade" - you do your task for today, and tomorrow it will be something different. If there's a good reason, like being sick, then an exemption can be made, but otherwise, you take your lot.
You could also do something similar but randomized - all chores go on a piece of paper in a jar, and right after breakfast, everyone draws. You get what you get, no discussions. (And if it was me, everything gets done RIGHT AWAY, before anyone has a chance to "forget" their job or run out of time or whatever.) Then, of course, the slips go right back in the jar to prevent you making new ones every day!
"Assigned" chores caused a big problem for awhile in my home growing up, and something on these lines helped.
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#33 of 33 Old 09-05-2009, 12:09 AM
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I haven't had a chance to read all of the replies, but this is what I do with my two 7-year-olds. There are 2 chore times, both right before a meal. They have the same chores every day. There is no breakfast served until they have dressed, brushed teeth, made beds, and folded and put away their laundry. In the evening, while I make dinner, one of my sons has to: pick up dog poop in the yard, and go across the street and fetch the mail. The other has to sweep the kitchen and the hallway and set the table. The latter son is very dis-tractable and needs me there in the kitchen to ensure that he stays on track (hence the way the chores were divided). The consequences of not doing the chores is not getting a meal - so far, that hasn't happened yet. Additionally, their allowance is tied to helping around the house (share the money, share the work load), and if they complain or I have to remind them more than one to get it done, they have to pay me some of their allowance. So far so good, but it is not easy to keep them on track even with these things built in . . .

** I just saw in some of the posts above that some think that "assigned chores" is a bad idea. I think it depends. These chores were agreed upon at a family meeting, with the idea that it they might rotate at a later date. For me, the mom, the person who has to help see them through, it is easier to have the same kid helping daily with the same thing**
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