Revisiting to yell again:
Please don't use me as playground equipment!!! Every time I bend over to run your bath, pick something up (i.e. 100's of times a day), you jump on my head and back like a crazed monkey. You will hurt yourself!! You will hurt me!! In addition, if you ask to be 'swung' into the air by your hands - DO NOT swing in the air and then quickly raise and plant your feet in my face or stomach or boobs with the force of a ten-tonne truck!!
Repeat after me: Mummy is not playground equipment. Mummy is not playground equipment.
This thread is brilliant, sad, hilarious, and too late. I already yelled tonight.
GO THE F&*(&^K TO SLEEP! STOP UNPLUGGING THINGS AND THEN PLUGGING THEM BACK IN! STOP PULLING MY HAIR!!!!! GO TO SLEEP AND SLEEP THE WHOLE NIGHT FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THREE #*%!(& YEARS! PLEASE. JUST PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.
Wife to one amazing husband , SAHM to DS 10/09, DS 10/19, one furbaby , and lots of !
It is not necessary to turn on even one of the bathroom lights, let alone both, when it is full daylight, as the skylight makes it one of the brightest rooms in the house. If you did turn on the lights, TURN THEM OFF WHEN YOU LEAVE THE BATHROOM!!!! And when I refrain from yelling like this but use my pleasant, neutral voice to say, "Please turn off the bathroom lights," DON'T CLAIM YOU DIDN'T DO IT!! YOU'RE THE ONLY PERSON IN THIS HOUSE WHO TURNS ON LIGHTS FOR NO REASON!!
Stop asking me to measure you every couple of days. Remember how the last time we measured you, it seemed you were actually a bit shorter? Just wait a month at least, please, and STOP TWIRLING THE YARDSTICK THREE INCHES FROM THE STOVE!!!
I agree, that's an awful song. Yes, the singer's harsh, warbling voice is indeed dreadful. Absolutely, the lyrics are inane. Daddy agrees too. We all hate that song in our family. SO STOP SINGING THAT SONG OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND GROTESQUELY EXAGGERATING ALL ITS WORST FEATURES!!!
Mama to a boy EnviroKid 9 years old and a new little girl EnviroBaby !
I write about parenting, environment, cooking, and more.
STOP STANDING 100 TIMES A DAY WITH THE DOOR OPEN TO TALK TO ME WHILE YOU LET EVERY FREAKING MOSQUITO IN THE WORLD INTO THE HOUSE!!! YOUR BROTHER IS ALLERGIC TO MOSQUITOES!!! IT'S A FREAKING SCREEN DOOR! YOU CAN TALK TO ME THROUGH IT!!!!