It strikes me that you know when you start yelling --- dinner time, especially when going solo. My dh had a year of lots of out of town time and I took to doing things a bit differently when he was away. Dinnertime came earlier and was on paper plates (i know i know, bad bad bad) or was at least more simple to prepare. I often took them to the park in the afternoon, after naps, with a ton of snacks and let them run and play and play until it was cold and getting dark. Then home, bath, and another healthy snack and bed. Did you notice, we never ate dinner those nights. We just ate. Or what if you took a break for yourself before or while preparing dinner. Your favorite music and some quiet activity for the kids - coloring, playdough, etc. where you can get them busy then supervise while you stir up some noodles? Give a bit of slack to yourself and the kids in the evenings. Sometimes we just need to check in with our own bodies/minds about 4pm and see what WE need. SOmetimes I realllly need to pee and I've been putting it off too long. SOmetimes I need to have a snack myself because I'm getting short tempered from hunger. Sometimes I need to sit down and let the kids run amok while I gather my strength, then I'm ready to fact the evening. I'm carrying on too long. Hope something in there was mildly helpful. You are not alone. I was never ever a loud mouth type person and my kids have brought me to yelling on more occasions than I care to count. But not so much when I do a little bit of self care.