Dd will be 3 in two days-lately, we have been having a really hard time getting her to listen to what we ask her to do/not do-or for that matter, having her do the opposite of what we tell her. I know part of this is normal 3-year-old behavior, and part of it is a normal reaction to having a new baby (1 month old) around. But-I feel like I am losing it. This morning was seriuosly awful-I have never raised my voice/yelled at her so much in her whole life and this is NOT the parent I want to be. So, a couple of main questions I would like some advice on-
1. What to do when she won't listen (i.e. get dressed to go somewhere necessary? Brush teeth before bed? I'm talking about necessary things here, we are down to the bare minimum, lol)
2. What to do when she does the exact opposite of what I tell her (i.e. please keep your voice down, she screams)
3. How to stop threatening her all the time (can't think of a good example, but I feel like she wont' listen because it is the right thing to do, but because I threaten to take something away from her-i.e. don't throw the toy, I tell her I will take it away if she throws it, I count to three, she throws it anyway, I take it away, she starts screaming, I feel like she still doesn't learn anything). It seems like I am doing this ALL day long for EVERYTHING! Just once I'd like her to listen the first time!
So, this is not all the time, we have just had a couple of really really bad days lately and I feel like we need to make a change. I think part of this is that dp has told me her whole life that I am not strict enough, she needs more discipline, etc., and I finally caved in and got stricter and now I feel like things have gotten worse! She is very bright and funny, maybe a little too smart sometimes-so any help would be hugely appreciated!