How can I get him to stop pushing me to the edge? Update in post 27 - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 35 Old 04-14-2010, 09:13 PM
 
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What a great thread! I feel the same things many times. your update!

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#32 of 35 Old 04-14-2010, 11:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That makes two relatively fight free nights in a ROW!

I'm just like this:

and a little bit like this:

Let's hope I can actually learn from my mistakes, and get DH on board who after witnessing my quick diffusing of two incidents that days ago would have been major meltdowns this evening, and hearing my story about this morning, is skeptically optimistic but still laments "I must be the most patient father ever! When did I lose control of you people?!"

As if he was ever in control.

I am also very proud of ds today...he was playing with the play-doh in school with a few friends and they mixed up all the colors which apparently they are not allowed to do, so when it was time to clean up ds chucked it all away (that's not the proud moment) and the teacher was looking for it and getting (according to him) VERY frustrated and angry and even though he was really scared, he raised his hand and admitted to throwing it away, and he didn't rat out his friends for mixing the play-doh up.

These are moments I am going to hold on to for when I feel like throwing him to the wolves.

Rebekah - mom to Ben 03/05 and Emily 01/10, a peace educator, and a veg*n and wife to Jamie.
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#33 of 35 Old 04-15-2010, 08:21 PM
 
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I'm subbing to this thread and saving it, b/c I know I'll need it in a few years. Thank you for updating and that sweet, sweet story about walking to school!
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#34 of 35 Old 04-16-2010, 05:13 PM
 
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What a great and timely thread! My 5yo has been getting on dp's and my last nerves recently. The rudeness, and the "I want I want" and "that's not fair".... I've noticed that dp and I are speaking to him with very irritated tones, even over really minor things. (that's really uncharacteristic of dp- he's usually so respectful and gentle). I'm also guilty of saying no to something because it's more convenient for me.
It clicked last night that I NEED to change myself. I need to be more respectful and considerate of him (including finding more mutually agreeable ways to say yes!). I told ds that I was going to try to be more respectful to him, and I wanted him to be more respectful to me. And I know that he'll try. That's just the kind of person he is. It hadn't really occurred to me before reading Just1more's posts that I need to be *very* specific about what I want from him. I'm so good about giving acceptable alternatives for smaller kids, but I forgot that a 5yo doesn't just know everything I want him to know.

So thanks for starting this thread, and to Just1more for sharing her ideas!

Becky, partner to Teague, SAHM to Keagan (7yo), Jonah (2yo)
 

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#35 of 35 Old 04-16-2010, 06:36 PM
 
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wash.gif  Me  + bikenew.gif Dh =  broc1.gif  Dd1(9 yrs) + hearts.gif  Dd2(6 yrs) and blowkiss.gif Ds(3.5 yrs)
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