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#1 of 12 Old 06-19-2010, 12:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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assuming i even practiced gd correctly here which is probably not the case...

dd knocks over her baby brother, gives him a lump on the forehead. so i bring her into her room with me while i pack some clothes. i sit her in her bed and tell her it doesn't fly to hurt her brother so she needs to stay there until she calms down. i guess this is kind of a time out but i was there next to her. she gets defiant, tries to bolt out of the bed so i sit her back down. she flails in the other direction and smacks her forehead on the edge of the toddler bed. four stitches.

the flailing and defiance are recurring themes here. when it involves her brother being injured, i'm far less likely to want to sympathize or honor her needs. though in this situation i did keep my cool, i guess i'd like some feedback on how i could have handled better? has anybody come out of the toddler years with a psychotic switch-flipper and lived to tell the tale?

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#2 of 12 Old 06-19-2010, 03:16 PM
 
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Nak on iPod but didn't want to read and not reply. Not your fault re the stitches. Wish I had some good advice.

Sandra SAHM to Kayleigh and welcoming Emily January 2010
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#3 of 12 Old 06-19-2010, 03:45 PM
 
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When my DS was 2, he was getting into something, so I took his hand to lead him away from whatever it was. He wasn't to happy so screamed "NO" and threw himself on the ground, it happened so quick that I didn't have time to let go, and he dislocated his elbow . I was so worried about CPS when we went to the ER, but its pretty common lol, there's even a name for it "nursemaids elbow" heh. Don't feel too bad. Its somewhat normal for that age...at least in my experience.

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#4 of 12 Old 06-19-2010, 03:53 PM
 
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I think you handled the situation well. Sometimes kids just don't know the power of their bodies - she was using hers to express her frustration and it turned out bad. Look at what toddlers do when they are having tantrums! It is amazing they don't hurt themselve MORE often.

I often think it is a miracle kids don't get hurt more often on the sheer force of their own body movement. Sometimes I look at DH and ask him if survival of the fittest really is true, because our kids' actions seem to test that theory regularly.
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#5 of 12 Old 06-19-2010, 10:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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thanks for the support, mamas. i feel just terrible, of course... i'm still reeling from holding my baby down in the ER. funny about CPS, i had ds wrapped on my back and ended up chatting with a lady who thought it looked so cool and comfy. and had a 3-month old...and oh yeah, was actually the hospital social worker!

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#6 of 12 Old 06-21-2010, 12:02 AM
 
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Oh mama, it hasn't happened to me but I can imagine it will...

We've been going through similar stuff with the flailing and in our cases kicking. Cant wait for the phase to pass.
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#7 of 12 Old 06-21-2010, 12:54 AM
 
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Ugh, I know how that goes, thank goodness not ER level hurting.

And it isn't just themselves, if you ask "please give me that fragile object that will shatter sharp bits all over the place if you drop it" dd is just as likely to go to throw it.
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#8 of 12 Old 06-21-2010, 01:31 AM
 
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DS had a big lump on his forehead from something similar. I told him to stop jumping on my bed, and he threw himself down throwing a fit. Smacked his head on the windowsill. Thankfully not stitches level!

I find it a little easier to do time outs in a specific room and then basically ignore sitting position/location. If it's a total ridiculous thing (DD has been put in time out on the couch but started sitting such that she was going to fall off the couch onto her head ) then the time out location changes and/or the time out officially doesn't start "until you sit correctly." If I physically tried to make them sit correctly though, I bet they would do the same thing yours did though.

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#9 of 12 Old 06-21-2010, 12:25 PM
 
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I usually start with something like "so I see you're angry/upset/whatever with your baby brother(while I pick baby up to console him). It seems to kind of slow them down a bit b/c you're calm and saying what you see, rather than focusing on what she did "wrong". If you were there watching you can continue to explain what you saw or perhaps she will chime in and explain what drove her to lose control. Then you could move on to what sort of thing she could do next time and just make sure for now you closely supervise. 3 is a rough age sometimes.

Cathy mom to 13 y/o DD, 10 y/o DD, 7 y/o DS

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#10 of 12 Old 06-21-2010, 04:55 PM
 
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I am coming out of the psychotic switch flipper toddler years currently. I see your DD is 2.5. yes you will survive, it will be rough and it isn't fun. My DD was a CRAZY 18m-almost 3 y/o, she was exponentially more intense than most other kids I know. I'm surprised she didn't ever have to get stitches due to her flailing, screamfests. Being a very pg mama with a bolting toddler is no fun.

We just went through a rough month, DH and I both went back to work, DH was laid off for 6 months and I had been a SAHM. That brought out DD's chaos again, she spazzed one day and hit her shin really hard, all her own doing-it sucks that they can hurt themselves from their freakouts.

I used to have to put DD in her room, it was the safest place for her to flail, she flopped on her bed-at least it was soft.

Me Wife to T (14 years)Mama to Princess(4) and Monster Boy(my 1 year old ):
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#11 of 12 Old 06-21-2010, 05:04 PM
 
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I got stitches a few times as a kid. Don't worry about it! Just be glad it was only 4 stitches and not more.
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#12 of 12 Old 06-22-2010, 04:02 PM
 
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i'm surprised ds hasn't required stitches yet with some of the stunts he has pulled, including the flailing/wall-punching/kicking screamfests that he frequently performs for us. I also try to keep my cool and calmly lead him to a safe place and ignore the tantrum (for him it has to be waited out, he can't e reasoned with), but I have to admit it doesn't feel very much like "gentle" discipline when "calmly leading him to a safe place" means I drag him by the hand to his room and pull the door shut while he wailsand kicks and claws at walls and furniture.

Very blessed mama to one bouncin' boy bouncy.gif (12/07) one angel3.gif who didn't get to stay (6/09), one potty learning, mess making divaenergy.gif(4/10), and one cheerful milk monster. aabfwoman.gif (12/11) Happy partner to the love of my lifedp_malesling.GIF.  

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