Oh, my dear, dear son! - Mothering Forums
 
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#1 of 7 Old 08-18-2010, 01:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Why do you scream like that? It's dinner time, I know you're hungry, because you're eating, but why do you have to scream your high pitched scream. It makes mommy go crazy. And it make daddy laugh because he's not used to seeing mommy look so crazy.

It really makes me want to slap you, my dear lovely son. But I don't. Why don't I? Because deep down (somewhere) I know that it's only going to make you scream with anger or sadness or hurt. AND it will probably make you scared of me. I don't want you to be scared of me. I love you! I want you to grow up to be well adjusted my dear son!

And I don't want to hurt you. I'm not going to slap you. I'm not even going to yell at you

So PLEASE, STOP SCREAMING!

I understand that you're probably trying out your vocal cords right now, but you're also testing mommy's ears. My dear son, mommy's ears are going to break if you keep up this screaming!

Mommy doesn't want to have to hear you screaming for what seems like all the time. We were having fun, you were helping me garden, but why do you have to caww like a crow out on our balcony? There are no crows around, and you were helping me pick mint. Did you really have to keep screaming like that?

You know what else? It's pretty warm in the daytime, and it really bothers me that you have to push hard against me(and stay there while I'm trying to wash the dishes) when you walk by. Just had to get that off my chest.



(OH, and does anyone have any suggestions for discouraging(or simply dealing with(i.e. to preserve MY sanity)) this type of behavior?)
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#2 of 7 Old 08-18-2010, 05:09 AM
 
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Earplugs?
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#3 of 7 Old 08-18-2010, 08:27 AM
 
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Was completely going to suggest earplugs too! Does NOT make you a bad mom to preserve your eardrums. And I love your post btw, so honest and real, hope he gets thru with the screaming phase soon.

"When the external begins to define the internal, instead of the internal defining the external, one begins living as a mortal rather than as a universal being." ~ unknown
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#4 of 7 Old 08-18-2010, 10:44 AM
 
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DD is a screamer too. I tell her that I can't understand her when she screams/screeches at me and ask her to use her words. Sometimes I'll even suggest a sentence saying something like, "You can say, 'I would like a snack please.'" Obviously, when she was pre-verbal this wasn't applicable. I guess I just endured it.

It's getting better, but at 3 YO she still hasn't outgrown it.

SAHM to DD (6/07) and DS (10/09); happily married to DH since 2/04 .
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#5 of 7 Old 08-18-2010, 12:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lolar2 View Post
Earplugs?
this suggestion really made my day

Quote:
Originally Posted by spmamma View Post
DD is a screamer too. I tell her that I can't understand her when she screams/screeches at me and ask her to use her words. Sometimes I'll even suggest a sentence saying something like, "You can say, 'I would like a snack please.'" Obviously, when she was pre-verbal this wasn't applicable. I guess I just endured it.

It's getting better, but at 3 YO she still hasn't outgrown it.
Oh no! 2 more years of this? Ay! Is there any way to get him to STOP the screaming?

We're fasting right now, its Ramadan, so about 10 minutes before it was time to break the fast yesterday, he was screaming(for no apparent reason, of course) and I told him "you know what? you're fasting now. go." (and then 30 seconds later I gave him a piece of flatbread) I usually do give him words to say in lieu of screaming, (though he cant actually say them yet--hmm, maybe i should give him some signs for these things)though I think he's only screaming for fun or something. when he actually wants something, he grunts, sometimes handing the object to me, like yesterday he was dragging a huge bag of flatbread around (to me) and grunted at me because he wanted some.
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#6 of 7 Old 08-18-2010, 01:00 PM
 
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Oh no! 2 more years of this? Ay! Is there any way to get him to STOP the screaming?
I wish! Let me know if you figure out a way.

Seriously, though, these days the screeching is often an indicator to me that she needs something and is too overwhelmed by her body to remember to use her words. Hunger, over-stimulation, fatigue, etc. are all triggers for her. When she was little it was more a mode of communication: I want something or need mama's attention. Or, she did it just because she could: Check out this cool noise I can make!

SAHM to DD (6/07) and DS (10/09); happily married to DH since 2/04 .
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#7 of 7 Old 08-22-2010, 05:50 PM
 
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wow i have a screecher too. the worst is the in the car

mama to one '07 and one '09
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