opinions on time out please - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#31 of 34 Old 10-31-2011, 03:57 AM
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Cover letter he!!
Posts: 6,387
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by Imakcerka View Post


I agree that working parents struggle with GD.  When DH and I were in the Military we were stressed 24/7.  Always something that we needed to do.  DH was a military brat so even he understood that Military kids are expected to behave even when it was hard for them to do so.  Working parents have less time to create a bond with their kids and less time to establish a good workable and fair routine.

 



Hmm....I'm less stressed when I am working - I really can't stand being at home with my ds for more than a few days (or a week or whatever I take for vacation).  He drives me NUTS. 

 

We do have an awesome evening routine though - its something I've spent a lot of time thinking about and implementing.  And we have a wonderful bond.  I'm beginning to hate being a working mom on MDC though, all I ever read is tons of judgments about working mom's, and how we can't possibly be good parents b/c we work and aren't taking care of our kids.  I think I'm going to stop coming to any forums other than the single parenting ones.  All the rest are pretty much useless for me.  (you know, b/c I work, and apparently that makes me a bad mom)

Super~Single~Mama is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
#32 of 34 Old 11-01-2011, 05:36 AM
 
hakeber's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Bogota, Colombia
Posts: 3,556
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by Super~Single~Mama View Post



Hmm....I'm less stressed when I am working - I really can't stand being at home with my ds for more than a few days (or a week or whatever I take for vacation).  He drives me NUTS. 

 

We do have an awesome evening routine though - its something I've spent a lot of time thinking about and implementing.  And we have a wonderful bond.  I'm beginning to hate being a working mom on MDC though, all I ever read is tons of judgments about working mom's, and how we can't possibly be good parents b/c we work and aren't taking care of our kids.  I think I'm going to stop coming to any forums other than the single parenting ones.  All the rest are pretty much useless for me.  (you know, b/c I work, and apparently that makes me a bad mom)



I work full time...and I don't think it makes me a bad mom, just a different mom.  What I may lack in preventitive measures I make up for in cuddles and kisses and special projects.  I too am less stressed when I work.  Being a SAHM is not good for me as a person and this, too, I think makes me a better mom than if I chose to SAH, because I am modelling for my children how to take care of myself and be respectful of my own needs. 

 

There are lots of ways to parent.  I don 't think being the zen-goddess of consensual, non-punitive, natural consequence GD is the only way to be a good mom.  It's just one of many. I think over all I have a good GD groove with my kids, but I am not afraid to admit my short comings.  There are somethings I am not so good at.  I don't think that makes anyone a bad mom.

 

 


Rebekah - mom to Ben 03/05 and Emily 01/10, a peace educator, and a veg*n and wife to Jamie.
hakeber is online now  
#33 of 34 Old 11-02-2011, 12:52 PM
 
meetoo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 753
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I use consequences like time out/room time as needed some times it 's timed, sometimes it a cool down period and when they are cool they get to come down. :) .  Many times it's logical. If your child is hitting you and pulling your hair it's logical to put her somewhere where she can't hurt anyone until she's done. It's not logical for you need to put yourself in timeout. Of course your going to be annoyed with someone treating you so badly!  Unlike what i heard from PD books/people consequences (not talking about spanking or other corp punishment)  have helped my relationship with my kids not hurt it! Kids need firm boundaries or they are constantly testing the limits which leads to a lot of child/parental frustration.

meetoo is offline  
#34 of 34 Old 11-06-2011, 02:49 PM
 
Zimbah's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: England
Posts: 263
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I've just started using time outs with my just-turned-3 year old.  I don't think I'm using them properly and it's not exactly helping!  On the few occasions I've used it, it's when things have escalated and DD1 is being extremely defiant/difficult.  The first time I did it, I sat with her on the bottom step.  I spent a long time making sure she sat with me while she tried to run off/cried/laughed.  Eventually she calmed down, sat quietly, and after a couple of minutes I explained to her about her behaviour etc.  That seemed to work on that occasion.  The problem now though is she thinks it's funny and starts messing around, and I do'nt know how to get her to take it seriously without getting really angry, which I am trying to stop myself from doing.  Aargh. 

Zimbah is offline  
Reply

Tags
Gentle Discipline

User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off